Finally decided to ttc... feeling excited/sad...

[brigmaman]

Hooray! We have finally decided to ttc #2 next cycle! Please don't get the wrong idea by the title of this post. I am extremely excited that dh and I have decided to ttc. I do not take this decision lightly as conceiving ds came after a few years of trying and an ectopic pregnancy. I also want to preface this by saying that I appreciate so much the fact that I even have this decision to make, and feel lucky that I have a wonderful ds that I enjoy very much.
That said, I am having mixed emotions. There is no doubt in my mind that I want to have more children, and I have always wanted them to be fairly close. The only way I can describe it is the way I felt the last time I nursed and when ds turned 1 and started walking. I guess I feel like I am slighting Brig or something. Is this normal? It may just be the uncertainty/excitement of what is to come.
I am having trouble articulating how I feel. Anyone ever feel anything close to this?
This may seem over-emotional and over-dramatic and therefore can probably be blamed on my impending "visit" this week. :)

[bluej]

Your emotions are perfectly normal! Excitement b/c you want a new baby to do it all over again and sadness b/c right now all of your attention is focused on one child and you can't imgine taking any of that attention away from him. Trust me, very normal. And in the end, it all works out. You end up having enough attention and love for the both of them. Good luck w/ the whole ttc process!

[starrynight]

Good luck!!! :)

[amp]

I haven't been there yet, but I think your feelings are totally normal. Congrats on your decision and good luck! We'll be looking forward to big news one of these days!

[jojo2324]

Congrats Trish!! I know how much you want this...I'll talk to you more on Friday, if illness doesn't prevail. (No playgroup tomorrow I'm afraid.)

[Momof3Labs]

I completely understand how you feel, Trish! We have talked off and on about ttc #2 but are waiting because I just don't feel ready - mostly for the reasons that you mention (although I DO feel ready for many of the other reasons that you mention). But so many of my friends with babies Colin's age are pregnant or trying, it makes me wonder what is wrong with ME!!

Good luck and +++ thoughts to you - may it happen more quickly this time around!

[kristine_elen]

I have similar feelings when I think about trying for #2. I look at Jack while he's sleeping and almost begin weeping at the thought of doing anything that would remove him from the center of our universe. Then I try to reassure myself by remembering that I was an only child until I was 18 (I now have a sister from my dad's second marriage) and that I'd always wanted a sibling. And I think about my husband and his sister and what a great relationship they have and it makes me feel better. I read on some message board that the love you have for your children is like a candle flame. That flame can light one or 100 other candles and never diminish. (Kind of cheesy, but apropos, I think.) Everyone I know who has more than one child says you have an endless reservoir of love and there's more than enough to go around. A brother or sister will only enrich his life, not take away from it.
Good luck!

[Marisa6826]

Trish-

I'm right there with you. We're going to see the fertility doc on Wednesday about starting the whole three-ring-fertility-treatment-circus again.

On one hand, I love the idea of a new baby sister/brother for Sophie. On the other, I am positively horrified at the thought of a newborn, a toddler and a c/s at the same time!!!

Hopefully we will both have good news soon!!

-m

[houseof3boys]

Trish I wish you the best of luck with this and send positive baby vibes your way!!! I think your emotions are totally normal and not at all dramatic or emotional.

[brigmaman]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts... I actually got my monthly visit (what a stupid term for it!) today, a few days early, so I know I can attribute being overemotional to that.
Glad to hear I am not the only one with mixed emotions. I guess we are all just really loving parents!

[ddmarsh]

Chiming in a bit late to say that it is one of those things that is, in the end, largely a leap of faith. Beforehand it seems barely impossible to imagine life beyond one child and your feelings are completely normal. It's truly something that cannot be fathomed until experienced, much like becoming a parent for the first time. I can only say that watching your children have one another and become part of one another's world is quite simply breathtaking.

Best wishes to you -