Can Anyone Advise Me Here?HELP!

[elvisfan]

My 27 year old sister has a bad case of "everyoneelseexceptformeismarriedorengaged" fever and is longing to be a in a decent relationship. I am trying to help her find ways to meet some nice guys......Any suggestions?
PS-She already tried match.com and refuses to do anything like that again........

[deborah_r]

Maybe if she took some classes at a local college, she might meet people that way?

[elvisfan]

>Maybe if she took some classes at a local college, she might
>meet people that way?
That's a good idea.She already has a college degree but I'm sure some non-college-credit type classes might be fun. She's a lovely girl-pretty and smart. She's just in a rut,kwim?

[Momof3Labs]

She should do what she enjoys. I met DH while doing some volunteer work for a dog rescue group.

And tell her that when she finds Mr. Right, she'll know that he was worth the wait. Hard to imagine, I know, but I was in her shoes 4 years ago and then met DH!

[janeybwild]

I agree with Lori. Perhaps it depends on where she lives, but I know of girl friends who have enjoyed singles groups that are geared around activities. For instance, one does Habitat for Humanity, another does Soup Kitchen stuff. Neither has met a match yet (perhaps best not to pass that bit on to your sister!) but both have said thay are having fun and have made some new single girlfriends with which to pal around with. Five minute speed dating seems to be popular here also, my girlfriend said although it was a bit exhausting, it was a great way to meet lots of people in one night. I met my husband on-line (which is something I never thought I would do), and 4 years later here we are. So, never say never. I am sure she is sick of hearing that one! Good luck.

[JMarie]

Are you anywhere near Chicago???!!?

My best friend is a guy in the same situation. He's a little younger in age but I tell ya - if I weren't happily married, *I* would date him! He's such a catch - I'll set them up!

Jennifer
Mom to Aidan Christopher
01/28/03

[Marisa6826]

Hmmm. I know she already tried and didn't like it, but I found Jonathan through match.com!! I am the fifth married couple from match that I know of.

Honestly, the more you look, the less likely you are to find... I always trolled for single guys in the laundromat! At least they were clean! :)

Good luck to her. It's hard to find a good one!

-m

[kransden]

Tell your sister to read this book: What Every Woman Ought to Know About Love & Marriage by Joyce, Dr. Brothers http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0345321138/qid=1070556202/sr=1-10/ref=sr_1_10/002-2563305-1778409?v=glance&s=books

It is an excellent book and has very practical advice. My dh and I did the question part before we got married. It is amazing how many people don't think about what they want in a life mate.

One of my co-workers btw, a PhD in her late 40s, met her husband of several years on match.com when it was in beta test. They travel all over the world on vacations. So there are good guys on there if your selection critria is right. Of course there was the friend that only found guys that wanted sex, but that is another story.

Karin and Katie 10/24/02

[amp]

Too bad she's soured on the online dating. It's how my met my DH! I didn't use match.com, but americansingles.com, which was free when I used it (I don't think it is anymore). I guess you could say I am a walking advertisement for online dating!

[dogmom]

Get a dog. I'm very serious. I decided in my mid 30's that I was sick of "looking" for someone and decided get a dog for companionship and date for, well, other reasons. I had met, started dating, and got engaged to my DH about 6 months after that. I think being much more relaxed about it and not feeling so alone definately helped me make that happen. I'm convinced if I hadn't gotten my dog I would either not be married or be unhappily married to the wrong person. It was much easier to go "NEXT!" to the guys I met when there was a big, lovable lab waiting at home for me.

Jeanne
Mom to Harvey
1/16/03

[NancyJ_redo]

Add another to the "married due to online dating" column. DH and I met through [email protected], which was match.com's predecessor. I met a handful of lemons through online dating, but then came my husband. He's incredible...I couldn't have dreamed up someone better for me than him, we are incredibly compatible and he's perfect in my eyes (well...not "perfect", but you know what I mean :) ). I was 32 when I met him, so I definitely did my time with "everyoneelseexceptformeismarriedorengaged" fever. My only regret is that I wish I hadn't worried so much about when I'd meet the right person. My suggestion is to tell your sister to try match.com again, lots of my husband's friends do it (most of them doctors, and good looking to boot!) and I think there are truly great guys on there.

edited to add: I agree with the dog recommendation as well. My best friend did that about 2 years ago, and not only did it help take some of the pressure off meeting the right guy, it largely alleviated her depression and gave her a companion. She's now on the verge of getting engaged to someone I set her up with a year ago.

[nola]

Plus the dog makes for a good conversation piece when taken downtown on Sunday mornings or to the park, the ballgame, the walk/run event, etc.

[nola]

Has she got guy friends? Guys know other guys. And often they know whether they are nice to other girls or not.
N

[Momof3Labs]

Well, if it is a guy-friendly dog. A poodle dressed in pink bows with pink nail polish probably won't attract nearly as much attention as a "guy's dog." LOL!