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View Full Version : horrid er saga-very long, sorry



emilyf
01-15-2004, 01:21 PM
Tuesday night I was out at a friend's house for a rare girls night and I got the dreaded phone call from dh, you've got to come home. He was walking down the stairs to put Charlie down for the night and slipped. They both fell down the stairs, ds seemed ok but every time he tried to pick him up, move him etc. he cried. So, I rushed home to find ds lying on the bed cheerful as can be, but sure enough when I picked him up he cried-not screaming, but definitely not right.

We took him to Hopkins, which is close to our house and our ped is an affiliate there so even though it has a reputation of having a crazy er we went there. After going through the whole waiting routine-triage, registration, etc. We finally saw a resident. She thought it seemed like his left leg was bothering him so she sent us down for x-rays. Initally she only wanted the leg, but while we were there she called down to have a whole body series done. Ds was screaming his head off, and after we were about halfway through they were trying to get a shot of his hand and he would not hold still so the tech brought out some tape. At that point I said, enough is enough, his arms and hands are fine. Let's take what we have and see. He was completely hysterical at this point.
So, we go upstairs and wait. For a really long time. It was now one am and I almost walked out, dh insisted we stay. Finally the resident, the attending and another woman came in and we found out why we had waited so long. The dr. said it appeared that ds had a fractured femur, but that it had not occurred that night and that he had several other stress factors. The other woman was a social worker and the police had been called. What a terrifying moment! They sent us down for more x-rays. We were so angry and scared. I was thinking of all the bad lifetime movies I had seen, and was also thinking about brittle bone disease, searching my memory for other occasions he may have hurt himself etc. We came back upstairs with the x-rays and were met by a police officer. Fortunately, he was terrific and on our side almost immediately. He was asking us questions but I could tell he believed us and did not think there was any abuse involved, we were all just so puzzled. Soon the orthopedic guy arrived, and he quickly calmed the whole situation down. He said the fracture WAS current, was completely consistent with the accident description and there were no other stress fractures. I was so relieved, and pretty angry with the initial dr. We had to meet with a child abuse detective, she wrote up the whole thing as an injured person report w/out even mentioning the abuse part. The ortho guy said he would need a whole leg cast but we would need to wait 10 hours since it would involve sedation and I had just given Charlie some cookies. At that point, I said we would like to go home and get some sleep and come back. He seemed really surprised and said I would have to sign out ama. I said fine. In came the original er doc who said he advised against it, and that it would make us "look bad" since the police and dss had been involved. I was furious. We had been cooped up in a tiny exam room with plastic chairs and an exam table and it was now 2:30 in the morning. DS was exhausted. I said we would need a room and a crib, which we finally did get. The ortho guy came by at 7:30 and said he had discussed the case, and they had decided they could scale back the cast (which originally would have involved both legs and his waist) and do just the injured leg and a waist band, also he could just get a shot of morphine so we wouldn't have to wait. So, that's what we did and poor ds is finally home, wiped out from the whole experience and dragging a big old cast around. I feel so badly for him, he had just gotten the hang of standing without holding on, and was so thrilled with himself. It seemed like he was only a few weeks from walking, and now is totally sidelined for 4-6 weeks. Dh is bruised and miserable too. Fortunately, my ped said we are now hooked up with a very good ortho group and that he will probably mend just fine. Of course we had to cancel our Cancun trip too. Anyway, thanks for reading the saga-it helped me to write it out!
Emily \r\nmom of Charlie born 11/02

deborah_r
01-15-2004, 01:29 PM
Oh, Emily, that is horrific...I'm so sorry. And I totally understand your "bad Lifetime movie" images. I actually had images of "ER" as I read your story. That is a nightmare for any parent. Poor Charlie and poor you and your DH. Try to get some rest, if you can.

Calmegja2
01-15-2004, 01:29 PM
How scary. I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that, but I'm glad you are all back home safe and sound.

sntm
01-15-2004, 01:34 PM
Oh, poor Charlie! What an awful experience for everyone! And feel so bad that you had such a terrible ER experience. It's probably not much of a consolation, but at least you know that if there had been an abuse issue there, they are vigilant (militant?) about investigating, but I'm sure that doesn't make up for the embarrassment and exhaustion of going through that.

I feel so bad for the little guy having to miss out on standing for a while. A friend of mine slipped on the stairs while carrying his baby son -- luckily they were not hurt, but his wife instituted a no-socks policy to minimize slipping. Still, I think about that everytime I'm on the stairs, as my pj bottoms always tend to drag and I've come close to slipping more than once.

Hope things look up today and that Cancun can be rescheduled...
{{{{{{hugs}}}}}

shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03

TaChapm2
01-15-2004, 01:35 PM
Hugs! I'm so sorry you are had to go through this. Poor Charlie! I hope he feels better soon.

Tara
Mommy to Jackson (11-10-02)

cchavez
01-15-2004, 01:39 PM
What a terrible experience. I hope Charlie heals quickly.

I fell down the last two steps of our stairs w/ Diego about a month ago. He was fine but I was sore for days!!!

twins r fun
01-15-2004, 01:39 PM
Oh my god, Emily! The ER viist sounds awful, but so does everything else-the cast, the cancelled trip. But the social services thing sounds like something that should only happen in a nightmare or like you said a movie. You must have been terrified. I hope Charlie learns to get comfortable with his cast on and heals quickly. I'll be thinking of you guys. Who was your orthopedist? We're going to see Dr. Sponceller (sp?) up there in a few weeks.

MartiesMom2B
01-15-2004, 01:45 PM
Emily:

So sorry. I hope Charlie heals quickly.

I know what you mean by those Lifetime stories. Too scary! I'm glad that everything was able to be straightened out even though you had to go through h#ll for it.

Sonia
Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03

heva
01-15-2004, 01:54 PM
Emily, I'm so sorry! I must say I've almost tripped myself going down our own stairs, and I think about it every time. I can only imagine how your DH must feel... Glad that telling all of us about it was therapeutic - I totally understand that feeling, and it makes me so happy to participate in these boards!

Hugs and prayers for all of you!

Marisa6826
01-15-2004, 01:59 PM
Oh YUCK

I'm so sorry to hear about such a horrible time.

The more I read about stairs the more I'm freaking about carrying Sophie up and down them!

Sending feel better vibes from Sophie to Charlie!

-m

todzwife
01-15-2004, 02:34 PM
Oh my gosh ! I almost started cryine when I read this! I am so sorry!!! Your poor DH! Hugs and prayers for a speedy recovery!

momathome
01-15-2004, 02:36 PM
Oh, man, Emily, I am so sorry to hear about yout terrible experience. What a nightmare! I really hope that Charlie feels better soon. {{{HUGS}}}
-Lauren

parkersmama
01-15-2004, 02:59 PM
Oh, Emily!! That is so awful!! Poor little Charlie dragging that cast around. A fractured femur...no wonder he cried when you picked him up! I feel so bad for your dh, too. and you. Oh, my. It must have been very frightening for you to have been confronted with the social worker and the police! I think you did great holding it all together! {{{BIG HUGS}}} Hope the little guy is feeling better quickly!

bluej
01-15-2004, 03:14 PM
What a horrifying experience! I would have been scared to death! Of what was wrong w/ my baby, of the doctors, of the social workers, of the police! I'm so impressed by how you handled it all! I hope that Charlie mends quickly and in the meantime adjusts to life in a cast. Hugs to you, DH and Charlie.

peanut4us
01-15-2004, 03:33 PM
Emily, how awful. I can only imagine how scared and angry you must have been...not to mention concerned with poor Charlie's leg. I'm glad that it all turned out OK in the end. Kids are so resilient... I'm sure Charlie will be able to get around much easier in that cast than you think.

amp
01-15-2004, 03:42 PM
Oh, Emily, what a terrifying ordeal! I don't know if I'm the only one, but I got choked up reading your post! Poor little Charlie. And how frightening for all three of you! I am so relieved that, in the end, everything turned out ok, save for a cast, major frustration and a cancelled trip. It sounds like it could have turned out so much worse! I hope Charlie is on the mend soon and you guys should enjoy some rest time to recoup from your experience. Charlie will be on the go and standing again in no time! Keep us posted!

jojo2324
01-15-2004, 03:46 PM
Emily, that's awful!!! I'm so glad everything "worked out" in the end (ie, they didn't think you were hurting your precious babe!!). But poor Charlie! It must be so hard to see him with his little cast. But he'll bounce back, and the 4-6 weeks will fly...It'll give him time to work on other stuff maybe, like language?

Thinking of you all, and I hope things settle down soon!!! Big hugs!! Cancun will be waiting for you, don't worry! :)

NEVE and TRISTAN
01-15-2004, 03:52 PM
OHH Charlie's avatar and those dimples just make me gush - you know his avatar makes me melt!!!!

Emily I am so so so sorry that you had to go thru first of all his getting hurt but what you had to experience in the ER. When Tristan surfed off the sofa at less that a week old I knew if I needed to go to the ER the chances were high that such a thing would take place. I've worked in an ER and have experienced many of those kind of calls and situations...my ER was very busy and very much like the flow at Hopkins I am certain...

I am so glad that the police officer was kind, understanding and just doing the routine vs being intimidating. ER staff such as Hopkins and where I worked see it all...it is sad what they see and have to live with seeing. I am not defending them in the slightest becasue had that happened to me I would be mad mad mad too!!! (hurt , embarrased, defensive just to name a few!!!)...

But in aftermath (and this is easier said than done) look at that awful experience as "taking one" for the children that can't speak in real abuse cases, I think that would be the only way I could come to terms with it. Just that you had to go thru that for the chance of them possibly being saved...(I don't know if that makes sense it's hard for me to communicate my thoughts at times)...

ALSO...to everyone...and I hope that an insurance person here can educate you better than I can on this. If you check out AMA (Against medical Advice) you are setting yourself up for insurance to deny the claim. It is awful, and I have wanted to go home from ERs quicker than they were ready more times than I can count. BUT insurance companies look for ways out of paying many times, and such an action allows them to "chalk it up" as a non emergency. They can say "well if she was good enough to go home then it wasn't an emergency"...or if the ER had Charlie down for the first slot in the OR to open there is probably a fee for that (charged to insurance)...if you went home they could say "we aren't paying that STAT/ASAP portion (which would be a huge chunk, it could involve calling in staff, over time etc...) ...
Just a little note about that since I suspect all of us at some time in the night are going to be in the ER with our children- at night when we so desperatly want to go home...

Again I am sorry!!!
Big hugs to you all...
Neve
AKA "mama2be"-forgot password
and Baby Boy Tristan born @UNC
Feb 25, 2003
Brother to 3 pups "gees" and 2 kitties

Roleysmom
01-15-2004, 04:21 PM
Oh, Emily, what a horrible, horrible night. I'm glad the three of you are now home where you belong. It does sound like you did a great job being a good advocate for your babe in a very stressful situation and holding it all together. I'm sure Charlie will bounce back in no time and this will be a funny story at some point (maybe a while from now, but at some point!) in the future. I hope you will be able to reschedule Cancun.

Take care --


Paula-- mom to Roley Julia 01-04-02

mharling
01-15-2004, 04:25 PM
Oh, Emily! I can't believe what all of you have been through. I am very impressed with how you handled it. Lots of hugs to you, your dh and Charlie!

http://www.auction-pix.com/katasha/stuff/snowman.gif Mary & Lane 4/6/03

new_mommy25
01-15-2004, 04:30 PM
OMG, what a horrible experience and so scary! That is one of the things I fear most, tripping while carrying DS. I am so angry at that DR. who called social services. I mean, I guess they do have to be careful in certain situations, but it sounds to me like she really jumped the gun and caused a lot of unneccassary hassle, esp. since the other doc said everything was consistent with a current fracture.

Hugs to you and your family. I hope poor Charlie doesn't have to wear his cast too long. :( And boo about the Cancun trip.

khakismom
01-15-2004, 05:20 PM
OMG Emily! I cannot believe your horrible experience--what a nightmare! I cannot even fathom the suspected abuse part--that would have sent me over the edge. How terrifying!

I hope poor Charlie is on his way to feeling better. Big hugs to all of you--you, DS and DH too! :)

jd11365
01-15-2004, 05:42 PM
My jaw was open for the whole saga and I kept gasping at every sentence! What a horrible and horrifying experience! I was having visions of hundreds of BBB members swarming Hopkins for your defense! I'm thankful that all turned out ok and I hope Charlie is on the mend quickly!

Big hugs to you, Charlie...and your DH too!

Jamie
Mommy to Kayla
5-1-03

mamahill
01-15-2004, 05:48 PM
Oh my gosh Emily - what a nightmare!! You must have been terrified - I think I would have crumbled when the family services person showed up. Poor you. Poor DH. And most especially, poor Charlie:(. Wishing everyone some quiet recovery time...

jec2
01-15-2004, 05:54 PM
what a big bummer. Sorry to hear about the mis-adventure. Here's to quick recoveries for you all, but esp. the little one.

jennifer13
01-15-2004, 06:21 PM
How totally awful! You know, as I was reading this and got to the social services part, I thought you were going to discover abuse by some other caretaker in Charlie's life. I was so relieved to find out that wasn't the case! Poor little guy. Here's wishing you all a speedy recovery.

Jennifer
Mom to Norah 5/23/03

s7714
01-15-2004, 06:49 PM
I hope your little guy is feeling better. Babies usually tend to heal fast anyway, so he'll probably be ready to go before they even take the cast off.

I was curious if you were mentioning "brittle bone disease" just because of something you saw on t.v. or because of other factors such as a family history? I personally have Osteogenesis Imprefecta a.k.a. brittle bone disease, so if you (or any one else for that matter) have any questions relating to it, feel free to PM or email me.

Jennifer
Mommy to Annalia 03/03/03

emilyf
01-15-2004, 08:16 PM
Thanks guys, for all your nice thoughts. Shannon and Neve, the further I get from the situation, the more I realize that er drs are of course the first line of defense for abused kids and that is such an important thing. I think our particular dr could use a refresher course on x-rays, but I'm sure those are trickier in a small child. They may have jumped the gun a bit, but better that than missing something. And, Neve thanks so much for your info on insurance claims. That would NEVER had occurred to me. At that point all I wanted was for my poor baby to be home in his bed, I was more focused on that than on the injury I think. That's good for all of us to know. I also am feeling lucky it wasn't worse for both of them. There was a very small baby in the er that got taken straight back, I think he/she was very sick, and I know other parents are dealing with much, much worse situations every day. Anyway, ds is better today-doesn't seem to be in any pain and is figuring out how to drag his cast around ok. DH is thinking of attaching a wheel. A picture is attached.

Emily \r\nmom of Charlie born 11/02

vikivoly
01-16-2004, 12:45 AM
Emily,

I am so sorry to hear about Charlie. Kids are resilient aren't they? Poor little guy was sittin' on the bed smiling with a broken leg.

As I was going to tell you to post a picture of him in his cast. He looks so cute, but I bet you could just cry everytime you look at him. It's so hard to watch our babies struggle with anything.

heva
01-16-2004, 12:55 AM
Charlie, you're so handsome!

I just showed his picture to DH and he has tears in his eyes...when he was 2, he was in full leg casts for a while (apparently, they used to do this rather routinely for babies who were bow-legged). DH wanted me to tell you that he learned to get around on them just fine and was no worse for the wear when they finally came off. We'll both be thinking of you ;)

Mommie2MadLyn
01-16-2004, 01:01 AM
Emily, that really is so upsetting!!! I hope you are all feeling a little bit better now that you're home. But, what an awful experience to go through!! I agree with Neve though, it is something that could save the life of a child that really IS being abused. So, although it was very upsetting I'm sure...I guess it would make me feel better to know that they are doing this to protect innocent children? Does that make sense?

Edited: Just wanted to add that he looks so cute, and HAPPY!!!:D

sweetbasil
01-16-2004, 01:07 AM
Bless his little heart, Emily, and yours and your hubby's too...my heart kept sinking as I read your post- I'm so clumsy and have already broken bones carrying DS#1, I'm scared to death of the stairs now (didn't have them when DS#1 was a baby)!

I hope your little Charlie heals quickly. I never have told you how much I love his sweet little name, have I? ;)

Hang in there!

cinrein
01-16-2004, 09:56 AM
Emily,

Hugs to you and your DH, and especially Charlie. I'm so sorry all this happened. I'm glad to hear everyone is feeling better and that Charlie looks to be getting around just fine. I'll keep him in my prayers.

Cindy and Anna 2/11/03

NEVE and TRISTAN
01-16-2004, 11:58 AM
Emily,
Charlie is so cute!!!...I don't know I why I 'freeze' these images of the avatar pictures and forget our little ones grow up so...

Tristan says , "hey Charlie tell 'em you did it on the ski slopes!!!!" :)

Big hugs your way!!!
Neve
AKA "mama2be"-forgot password
and Baby Boy Tristan born @UNC
Feb 25, 2003
Brother to 3 pups "gees" and 2 kitties

emilyf
01-16-2004, 01:32 PM
Hey- we're seeing Dr. Miller, I checked their website and it looks like Dr. Sponceller is the head guy, so you should be in good hands. My ped said that whole department is excellent.
Emily \r\nmom of Charlie born 11/02

emilyf
01-16-2004, 01:36 PM
Thanks Jennifer, I only thought of it because I had heard of it on tv. The orthopedist did ask if there was a family history, but I think he felt the x-rays were consistent with the accident after all-I am going to discuss it again at our follow up, I'm curious what the original dr. saw that made him suspect other injuries-
Emily \r\nmom of Charlie born 11/02

daisymommy
01-16-2004, 02:40 PM
Oh poor Charlie! (and you and DH too) :( I hope he heals soon and isn't in too much pain. I'm just glad he's okay. Take Care of your boys for us...

jubilee
01-16-2004, 05:32 PM
What an awful situation!! I bet your DH is kicking himself and feels so bad. Give Charlie a big hug!

Melanie
01-16-2004, 07:30 PM
Emily I am so sorry. I hope Charlie heals quickly. What an ordeal for all of you.

Thatchermom
01-16-2004, 07:54 PM
I am so very sorry this happened to you all! When DS broke his leg nearly a year ago, we called our ped before going in. His habit is to meet parents at the ER to be an intermediary that knows the parents/child to try to avoid these kinds of situations. I know this may not be available in all practices, but wanted to share the tip for other parents...anything to avoid this kind of heartache!

Before you know it Charlie will be healed and right back in step with where he should be in learning to walk - it is amazing how fast they make up for lost time. Thatcher sees pictures with his cast and doesn't remember it at all. They still make me cry!


Susan
mom to Thatcher Bennett 9/10/01

toomanystrollers
01-16-2004, 08:38 PM
{{{{{{{{{{{{Emily, Charile & Dh}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

How scary!!! Phew, glad to hear everything is going to be ok.

Sarah1
01-16-2004, 08:53 PM
Oh Emily......I am so sorry for your ordeal. I hope you all feel better soon. That must have been one of the (if not THE) worst nights of your life.

papal
01-16-2004, 08:57 PM
emily.. hope charlie gets back on his feet really soon. poor baby looks so cute in his cast!
i feel so badly that you had such a terrifying night. i just want to say that i think you handled it really well.. dealing with the doctors and social services and police and dh and ds. that is amazing. and i totally hear you about the 'brittle bone' disease... thats the first thought i had when i was reading your post.. i guess too many lifetime movies.

sending healing vibes your way.

cvharris
01-16-2004, 11:32 PM
Emily,

HUGS to you, DH and Charlie. We have a ton of stairs in our home and that is one of my fears...they get so heavy when you are carrying them!

I'm sorry you had to go through everything you did at the hospital. Charlie looks like such a sweetie and I hope that he and DH heal quickly!

starrynight
01-16-2004, 11:37 PM
I teared up looking at his picture, I hate to think of anyone's baby hurt! What a handsome little guy he is. *hugs** and get well soon wishes sent your way. I'm glad for you that it wasn't worse.

I'm so sorry the doc scared you and all the other stuff you had to go through. The femur is pretty hard to break from what I heard so that is why the probably jumped the gun.

MamaKath
01-18-2004, 12:30 AM
Emily, hope your 2 guys are feeling better, and that you are relaxing a bit as well.

You might write to the hospital to let them know of how traumatizing the negative experience was. Just a thought!

Anyway hoping for a speedy recovery!