Eating in a DR with kids, is it possible?

[dogmom]

Sorry, this is long. Mostly I would like to get an idea from those who actually have family meals where you eat them.

The big house project before baby was redoing the kitchen. (Well, it was supposed to be before baby, but given what contractors are like, it got finished when he was one month old. How fun, new baby, no sink , dishwasher or stove.) I cook a lot, so the decision was made to put a big island in with a cook top, so no more room for a table and chairs, which is fine. I have a family room that is attached to the kitchen with two steps and a half wall. DS and I spend all our time in the family room and kitchen. The family room has a couch, all his toys, a small bar area, large heartth and 4 doors or openings, including the glass sliders to the deck. I don't really see a place for a table in here unless we loose a couch. And where would the dogs hang out then? ;)

Right now, I hate to admit it, we eat dinner in front of the TV after the baby goes to bed. We have a nice DR attached to our LR with a huge formal DR table. I hope we eventual eat our family meals in there , but I'm wondering how practical that is. I can get table pads made, and seat covers for the chairs, the cushions are white. I just like the idea of actually using the DR to eat, instead of it just taking up space and only being used twice a year. We do eat in their if we ever have guests. It might also prevent all the junk that currently accumulates on the DR table from doing so. I'll take any suggestions.

Jeanne
Mom to Harvey
1/16/03

[brigmaman]

Lol about the "junk that usually accumulates on the DR table." We don't actually use our DR more than you do. The whole room ends up being a catch-all for things we don't want to put away yet, or things that don't seem to have any other place (i.e. the vacuum, and my strollers!) Other than the nursery (which we never use either :)) it is the only room that is truly "done" in our house. By that I mean we painted over the white paint that DH used when he built the house. And we also bought furniture (yup- light colored fabric seats...) and have a rug and light fixture. Basically I have been thinking about turning it into a playroom, against everybody's wishes. We have a nook with a small table where we eat sometimes. But we also usually eat in front of the tv. There is enough room (barely) that we could move our dining room set into the living room and split it between living area/dining room, though. We used to eat in our dining room when I was growing up (5 kids-small kitchen-no choice) but we also didn't have any special dining set.
I think it is possible to eat in the DR. If you are worried about the upholstery you just buy chair covers. Now that I think about it, I really feel it is important to eat at least one meal together. DS is young- so he doesn't always eat when we do. We sort of held dinner sacred when we were younger. I have pretty fond memories of our family dinners together.
It always bothered me that when I moved out here that people had so many rooms they didn't use. That's why it kills me to have this useless DR. It's like having useless clutter around- I can't stand how impractical it is.

[dogmom]

Yeah, I know what you mean about "useless" rooms. I know two people who have dismantled their DR to make into playrooms for their kids. My DR is part of the LR and is actually a very nice room that feels "livable". One of the things that we love about this house is it has a very user freindly layout that is great for entertaining. Athough when I grew up we ate in our amazingly small kitchen, we always had Sunday dinner in the DR and when we got older the DR table was where we did our homework. I really want to USE every room im my house. I'm not that worried about the upholstery of the chairs, it's easy to redo them at some point.

I was also thinking of eventually buying one of those funky high chairs that convert to toddler chairs. That way when DS outgrows the high chair he can move to his own chair and eat at the table. Luckily, we don't have to worry about cleaning up the floor wherever he eats, that's how the dogs earn their room and board!

Jeanne
Mom to Harvey
1/16/03

[newbelly2002]

Jeanne,

The set-up in our place is that there is a "common room" which is both a living room and dining room together. We have a table in the kitchen, but once we added the high chair (a Stokke Tripp Trapp so it blends nicely with the rest of the wood decor adn we don't have to worry about chair covers) it was too crowded there. Now all meals are taken at the dining room table.

The Tripp Trapp has no tray so Dante is pulled up to the table with the rest of us. We worked hard at teh beginning on "the plate stays on the table" and now he does great. Dinners are pretty sacred to us, despite his young age (besides the only television is in our bedroom), so we all eat together pretty much without fail. Dante uses a plastic placemat for a wider radius and the dog gets what few scraps fall. But for the most part he's no messier of an eater than I am. When we were back in the States last week, we had the real test he ate in my parents formal dining room at my grandmother's antique table in a booster chair. I was more than a little nervous, but he did great.

This is all by way of saying that it might take some practice and patience, but it can be done. Consistency is the key, I think. Our only problem is that we've instilled the "family meals" concept a little too heartily. Now Dante gets ancy if we're not all sitting down and won't eat on his own. Good luck!

Paula
Mama to Dante, 8/1/02

[ethansmom]

Our house is set up so the DR connects to the Kitchen and LR. I hate to not use rooms, so we do eat often in the DR. Personally, I love sitting down to dinner in a nice room. We have my Grandparents' gorgeous antique walnut set and I have such great memories with it. Also, I find it's so much easier to leave the high chair in the DR. We just wheel it into the corner and it's much less in the way than if it were in the kitchen!

[emilyf]

Our setup is similar to yours, and like you we generally eat in front of the tv. Dh was a bachelor for a long time before we met and it has been his hardest habit to break. I have tried to institute a Thursday night we all eat in the dining room rule, and it has worked well. DH says he is all for it, but every week when it rolls around he does grumble. I use ds's hook on seat and he does fine. I'm hoping that as he gets older we can slowly move towards eating every meal in there together. Our family ate dinner together at a table (no tv) every night and I think it is really important.
Emily \r\nmom of Charlie born 11/02

[twins r fun]

Our dining room is pretty big in comparison to the house overall. When we moved in we wondered what you were supposed to do with the whole thing, since our fairly big table took up almost no space. Then we had kids and found its purpose-push the table up one end and use the rest for a playroom! Since we don't have an eat in kitchen, we have to eat in the dining room. We have the high chairs without trays pushed up to the table and that works well. Our chairs aren't upholstered so no problem there. The table has taken quite a few dings, especially since the introduction of silverware so now we have more of a "distressed look" than I had originally anticipated. The room is carpeted and that is the big problem. The carpet is a mess even though we have a steam cleaner. It's a big effort to steam clean it and then it gets dirty so quickly. The boys don't dump their food on purpose, but they just are MESSY (and I have to take credit for a fair amount of spills myself). But you know, it's obviously not supposed to look like a formal dining room with all those toys in there so I just forgive the stained carpet and hope others do too. I think it is important to have family meals when we're all home so it's worth it to me to scarifice the table and the carpet.

[macassi]

A neighbor of mine (with 3 kids ranging from 1st grade to freshman) just re-did her kitchen and put a big island in it. Now, she was able to put bar stools around the island, so the kids could eat there casually after practice or whatever. She then put hardwood floors in her dining room, and put a more casual (but still nice) table in the dining room. That's where they have family meals and do homework, etc. She really loves the fact that they use the dining room and that the kids can talk to her while she cooks/cleans up. I guess when the kids get older, you end up eating on different schedules to accomodate sports practices, etc. I think the key (after this long ramble) is that all you would really need to do to your dining room is put in hardwood floors -- we have hardwood in the kitchen -- and it makes it really easy to accomodate kids! Spills wipe up and there are no long term stains to worry about (or steam cleaning).

[khakismom]

We love eating in the DR. Most of the time we eat at the kitchen table, but for company, birthday parties, baptisms, family get-togethers, friends/family over for dinner, we always use the DR. We also do a dinner in there--just the 4 of us--at least once a month.

We used to eat in front of the TV too before we had children. But once Kathleen was born, we kinda made the rule that we would eat at the table as a family--or at least try to do it. ;) I've gotten so used to it that I always eat at the table, even if I'm by myself. Kathleen eats at the table too, and so does Ellen. It may take awhile to get used to, but if you start now, you'll eventually get in the habit of it. :)

[kalebsmama]

We live in an older house and don't have an eat-in kitchen so all meals are in the DR. It is actually nice to not have to move the highchair around. It sits on the side of the table away from the traffic flow. Our floors are hardwood so cleanup is easy. I can see where carpeting could get messy. When my stepsons were younger, (before we pulled up the carpet and refinished the wood) we had an inexpensive rug under the table. That way the carpet wouldn't be ruined if any tough stains happened. Once they were older, the rug was removed. SS #2 always spilled things though, even through high school!

DH and I both feel strongly that family meals are important. It is when you can talk to your kids (and each other) and find out what is going on. With stepsons, we would talk about school, friends, whatever they were into at the time. We also did alot of the "remember when..." stories which was a great way for me to find out more about their younger years. They were 10 & 12 when we met.

About the junk - I still tend to accumulate stuff on my table! It's the only table and when I'm working on projects I tend to spread out on the table. I keep it at the end of the table we don't use but it's still there. I'm working on trying to keep the table clear. It was also used for homework when SS's were in high school, but they had to clear it off before dinner. Usually they didn't start their homework until after dinner anyways.

It does seem a shame to have a room that you never use. In my case though, that isn't an option! Growing up, we had a fairly large eat in kitchen that we used most of the time. We did eat in the DR on Sundays. Not sure why it was different on Sundays, since we always ate all our meals together anyways! I guess it was just a fancier meal on a special day.

[COElizabeth]

LOL at the "distressed look"!

Elizabeth, Mom to James, 9-20-02

[AngelaS]

We only ever eat in our dining room. We have room for a kitchen table but got rid of it several years ago, to make room for an 'art area' for Adrienne and my rolltop desk I inherited when my mom died.

So, all our meals are eaten at the dining room table (oak and gorgeous!) with the baby in her oak high chair which sits on an off white folded twin sized sheet (the splat mat). Sure, there are a few carpet stains, but they clean up and in a few years, we'll need new carpet anyway.... :D