ANOTHER QUESTION ABOUT BEDTIMES AND SCHEDULES

[cuca_]

As I said in my previous post DD is not sleeping very well, and usually does not go to bed until 10:30pm. or so. I know I need to work on this, but one of my biggest concerns is the fact that DH usually does not get home until 8ish. For those of you whose DHs get home late at night, what do you do? Do your DHs not see the babies during the week?

DH also leaves for work at 7:00 am, so he is leaving as DD is waking up. It just saddens me to think that an earlier beadtime will mean that DD and DH will only spend time together on weekends. On the other hand, I do know that an earlier bedtime is essential. How do most of you deal with this sort of situation?

TIA!

Carmen

[cchavez]

Carmen,

My husband does not get to see Diego a few nites a week b/c he works late. He tries to come home early on Wed. nite to give Diego a bath. And on bath nite it is ok if Diego goes to bed 10-15 minutes later.

Anyway, I was thinking about your previous post Weissbluth says not to let your DC sleep past 7am to keep them on a developmentally appropriate schedule. Maybe you can wake your dd up at 7am and DH will get to see her for a few minutes??? Then naps will be earlier and hopefully bedtime will be earlier????

hth

[lizajane]

it really sucks. happened to us a lot in the fall when dh was CRAZY at work. but there is no way i am going to be at home with a super nutty kid all day just so daddy can see him for 20 minutes before he goes to bed screaming from being overtired. we just decided that it sucked, but schuyler didn't deserve to miss out on his needs just because his daddy had to miss out on him.

i haven't read your other post, so i will check it out and see if i can offer any encouragment (instead of just saying how it sucks. i sound really negative, don't i...)

[mharling]

Until November, my dh was gone during the week every week. He is now working locally and at first he was usually home before Lane went to bed. One night he got home later than normal and I kept Lane up. BIG mistake! We learned our lesson that night and vowed to each other that Lane goes to bed when he needs to go to bed; period. And in our case, even if he doesn't see him one or two nights, it's still more than he saw Lane when he was traveling.

http://www.windsorpeak.com/dc/user_files/2303.jpg Mary & Lane 4/6/03
http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=67b0de21b346cc5b6556 - New pics 1/26

[miki]

My kid goes to sleep super early, usually around 6pm and sometimes as early as 5:30pm. My husband is generally never home before 7pm and usually not until later. There is no way I could keep her up to see him. She would be crazy tired! She generally wakes up around 6am and that's when he's getting up and getting ready for work. He'll change her diaper in the morning and after she nurses we'll watch him get ready. He plays with her a bit before leaving for work. When she wakes up before we go to bed, he'll change her diaper before I nurse her. Other than that, he only sees her on the weekend. Sucks, but a baby needs her sleep!

[AngelaS]

My dh doesn't work late, but he used to wake the baby up for me in the morning and change her and bring her to me to be nursed while he got ready for work. Then he had some time to play with her first thing in the morning when she was always in a really good mood. :D

[kristine_elen]

My son is usually asleep by the time my husband gets home (around 7:30 or 8 p.m.) but Jack gets up at around 5:30 or 6 a.m. so my husband spends some time in the mornings with him. (We actually wish Jack would stay up a half hour later and sleep in more, but that doesn't seem to happen...) Maybe your daughter could go to be around 8:30 and your husband could put her to bed, etc.?

[cuca_]

Thanks for your replies! I know her sleep is more important, but it just saddens me that they will not see each other during the week. DD usually wakes up at 7:00 am or later and DH walks out the door at 7:00 am. Maybe I will try Kristine's suggestions and try to make 8:30pm her bedtime. Thanks again!

Carmen

[NancyJ_redo]

We have a shifted schedule because we (DH and I) go to bed very late. I usually put DS down between 8 and 8:30, sometimes a little later depending on how his naps went that day. DH gets home anywhere between 7p and 9p, and I used to let him walk in and play with DS, who gets so excited to see his dad. But, I realized once DS would get all worked up it was torture to try and get him to sleep. So now DH will sometimes see and interact with Braeden before he goes to sleep, but we make sure it's quiet time. He now goes to sleep MUCH easier, and usually sleeps until 8a, sometimes later on weekends.