When did you tell people that you are expecting?

[shishamo]

My DH and I can't decide how long to wait. Obviously, I am worried about the m/c possibility...

Also, if this is your #2 (or #3, or #4...), when did you tell your other children?

[Rachels]

I varied. I told many people early, partly because I knew I'd need support if I miscarried, partly because I was so sick and wanted to explain myself. I told most of my clients at 9 weeks, when it became impossible to make it through a session without snacking (or the alternative-- projectile vomiting).

Congrats, by the way!

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02

[MartiesMom2B]

I told DH that next time I'm not telling his family until I was in my fourth month. I think I generally told my friends when I was in my third month. I had to tell some people earlier b/c I was very sick during my pregnancy and had to explain it.

Sonia
Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03

[brubeck]

In both pregnancies I told most people when I finished the first trimester. I told my parents and a few close friends as soon as I had a positive pregnancy test but the vast majority had to wait! :)

As for telling the older child, even the day before DS was born DD wasn't really old enough to understand that he was coming so it was more just a general discussion about babies for 6 months.

[jubilee]

When I got pregnant with Logan I was excited and terrified at the same time, so I told everyone, including my boss the Monday after I found out. I had to since I was bawling my eyes out at work... LOL!

[mamahill]

I am HORRIBLE at keeping secrets. We told my parents a week after getting a + pg test. We told the rest of my family a day later (big family reunion/get-together). I told friends about a couple weeks after that. Part of me was afraid of a m/c, but it was overwhelmed by the side of me that *knew* I wouldn't, and that it was a red-headed girl. My mother's intuition kicked in at conception, I guess;).

BTW, CONGRATULATIONS!!

[JenCA]

First off, congratulations on your impending bundle of joy--how wonderful! :)

I told my best friend right away (turns out, we both found out we were pg at the same time--and our daughters are only two weeks apart!). We waited and told our family/friends after I had my first u/s at 10w5d. Then, we told work when I started my 14th week. We were very concerned about m/c, and because the baby was to be the first grandchild on both sides, we did not want to have to "un-tell" everyone (the grandparents, in particular). Best wishes for a happy and healthy nine months!

[khakismom]

Big congratulations to you and your fam! :)

I told my parents and brother as soon as I got the positive on the PG test, both times. I was around 10 weeks PG with Kathleen when I told everyone else--family and friends. With Ellen, I just found out around the time my brother got married and most of my friends sniffed it out when I wasn't drinking at SIL's bach. party. So I ended up telling family around 7 weeks at during my brother's wedding weekend.

As far as telling Kathleen about another baby coming, I think I was around 6 months and she was almost 2. Before Ellen was born though, she absolutely understood that a new baby was coming and coming out of Mommy's belly. Even now, every week she tells me that I need another baby in my belly, that she wants another sister. :)

[Tondi G]

well with DS we waited to tell anyone till I was almost 3 months along. I am glad we did cause my mother and sister had a hard time keeping thier mouths shut! with my next pregnancy we waited till we had an U/S at 7 weeks and saw a heartbeat. Then we slowly told friends and family. At my 12 week appointment they couldn't find the HB and had another U/S that showed no HB and a baby only measuring 8 weeks 3 days.... needless to say we had to untell EVERYONE. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be and everyone was very supportive. I think the next time we get pregnant we will tell immediate family after the early U/S but wait to tell the WORLD till after 12 weeks and seeing and hearing the heartbeat!

Good Luck, HTH's you!

~Tondi
Mommy to Mason (7/8/01) and my lil ~i~ (MC 11/25/03)

[Karenn]

Both times we've told family and close friends right away, and tried to wait to tell everyone else until after the first trimester. However, I've realized that I don't hide pregnancies well. (I get pretty sick and, I'm really not good at keeping secrets!) So we've ended up telling a couple more people than planned. Still, we've tried not to tell anyone that we couldn't inform easily if something were to go wrong. If I had a miscarriage, I would want my family and friends to support me, but I would hate to have acquaintances come up to me in the grocery store and tell me I was "showing" even when I'd lost the baby. (Happened to a friend of mine. :( )

We haven't told DS. Right now he's too young to really get it. Maybe in a few months we'll start trying to talk about babies in tummies.

[brigmaman]

The first time I got pregnant, we told our immediate families right away. We ended up telling everyone else anyway when it turned out to be ectopic and I was hospitalized. So with Brig, we told our parents pretty soon after as well. I figured (as Rachel mentioned) that if anything went wrong I would need the support of others again. I also learned the first time that if I did m/c again, it would be easier to have people know already, rather than go through explanations again.
So for this time...whenever it happens, I'll tell people soon after. It can be pretty much all-consuming to worry during the first few weeks. I don't want to go through the first few weeks without anyone knowing.

[C99]

I told my best friend the day that I found out I was pregnant (this was because she was calling to tell me that her son had been born that day). I told my mom maybe a week or two later. We told my husband's brother when they called us to tell us that his wife was pregnant. I told my in-laws, brother and more friends after I saw the h/b on the u/s. I told everyone else at 12 weeks. I actually never told anyone at work, even after I got laid-off when I was about 16 weeks. I told my old boss when I was 22 weeks.

[Melanie]

Congratulations! We told parents & one set of very close friends pretty much when we found out and everyone else at 3 months. It was REALLY hard to make it through the first trimester at work without telling people (i.e. explaining my behavior) but I'm private in a way that had anything happened I didn't want to be rehashing it with people I didn't really know well.

[doubleL]

First off, Congrats!!

For DS I told my parents about a week after I found out. My mom would have killed me if I had waited any longer. For others I waited until about the 12 week period which gave me time to get comfortable with the news myself. It was not exactly planned.

For DD I told everyone as soon as I got the + pregnancy test. I thought it made for a VERY LONG pregnancy. After about 6 months people were like, aren't you due yet?! DS's language is a bit delayed so while I talked about it with him a lot I have no idea if he really had any clue what was going on.

Hope you have a happy and uneventful pregnancy!

Lou
~David 5.01
~Elisabeth 6.03

[doubleL]

What do you tell Kathleen when she tells you SHE wants another baby in YOUR belly... LOL :) ??

Lou
~David 5.01
~Elisabeth 6.03

[doubleL]

What do you tell Kathleen when she tells you SHE wants another baby in YOUR belly... LOL :) ??

Lou
~David 5.01
~Elisabeth 6.03

[khakismom]

LOL! I usually tell her "maybe later". :)

She amazes me though. The last time she said this--4 days ago!--I told her that she might not get another sister, that it might be a brother. And she burst into tears, saying that she didn't want a brother, but a sister. I told her that she was getting WAY ahead of herself. :) And then last week she asked me "How do you make people?" You should've heard me stammering...

[khakismom]

LOL! I usually tell her "maybe later". :)

She amazes me though. The last time she said this--4 days ago!--I told her that she might not get another sister, that it might be a brother. And she burst into tears, saying that she didn't want a brother, but a sister. I told her that she was getting WAY ahead of herself. :) And then last week she asked me "How do you make people?" You should've heard me stammering...

[hez]

We told the couple we're closest to the day we got the + pregnancy test-- they knew how long we'd been trying, and I needed at least one girl friend to confide in.

I was a 'spotter' early on, so actually had the vag. u/s at my first & second appointments. I waited 'til after the 2nd (8 weeks) to tell our families & church. I didn't want people, even my parents, asking me things I wasn't prepared to talk about 'til after my fears were relieved.

Wanted to wait 'til after my 3 mo. appointment to tell work, but got called on it during a happy hour around 11 or 12 weeks when I was downing Sprite instead of a margarita... I'm not a good liar, so I fessed up & then told my boss the next day so the happy hour crew didn't have to keep the secret.

Next time around I plan to wait 'til after the 1st trimester to tell folks at work again, but the rest (family, church) will depend on circumstances, I think. It's at least a year or two off at this point, so I have time to change my mind on that...

ETA: Where are my manners? CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

[AngelaS]

With Adrienne we didn't tell anyone until about 8 weeks.

With Gabrielle, I peed on the stick and called my best friend. LOL (I told dh later that day!). :D We told everyone else within a couple weeks.

With this baby, we waited more than a week to tell anyone and my folks will find out this week when they get home from Arizona and we're waiting to tell his family when we see them in April.

[new_mommy25]

I didn't tell anyone until I was 3 months, including my parents, but DH blabbed to his entire work and his parents that day.

[papal]

Congratulations!!

I wanted to tell my mom after we had it confirmed by the midwife with an ultrasound (8 weeks?) but as luck would have it, my maternal grandmom was very sick and i (along with all her other grandkids from around the world) returned to India to see her. So i could not make the OB appointment. My grandmom did not make it and passed away a month later. Amidst all that turmoil i did not want anyone focussing any attention on me so i did not tell anyone. Finally, it was getting time for me to return to the US and it was my parents wedding anniversary so dh called my mom to wish them a Happy Anniversary and told them their present would be arriving in another 6 months. My mom took a while to understand what he was talking about but when she finally understood she was so thrilled... they all think Leela is the reincarnation of my grandmom. :)

[toomanystrollers]

I blabbed as soon as I peed on a stick for all three LOL :)
Congratulations!!!!!

[Elilly]

Congratulations! With Colleen, we told all family and friends at 8 weeks b/c DH couldn't keep a smile off of his face. This time I shared with all close family and friends at 8 weeks. I told all the people that if something goes wrong, I would want as a support network. So, once we hear the heartbeat this Friday, it will be public knowledge. As for telling siblings, Colleen is only 15 months, so it's not really an issue for us. A few friends of mine have told their 2-3 year olds once they start to show.

[llcoddington]

Congratulations!!!

With my first pregnancy, we waited until past first trimester, but I found out I had miscarried around 15 weeks. With next pregnancy, I again early miscarried, so many people never knew. With Lauren, we told a few close friends and family as soon as we found out I was pregnant so that they would pray. Everyone else we waited until I was about 20 weeks!!!

Lana
mommy to Lauren 12/5/03

[McQ]

Well the first time I told my few close friends right away. But only because they knew we were trying. We had tried for 9 months so my girlfriends were much needed for each of those disappointments. Then once I got pregnant I miscarried so it was great to have them. Never told the families about that one.

With Declan, I told my girlfriends right away and then waited until 14 weeks for families, limited work and other firends. Some people I didn't tell until 6, 7 and even 8 months. I really wasn't showing much and it was kind of cool to have a secret.

Allison
~ mommy to Declan 3.24.03