clothing gifts from grandma- if you don't like them?

[lizajane]

i don't know WHAT to do with the clothing that schuyler got from grandma that we don't like. he is never going to wear some of this stuff, and a lot of it is past season now, too. (or he has outgrown it, etc.) i really don't want to store this stuff for my second child when i wasn't even willing to put it on my first child. but i am so worried that if i "yard sale" it, she will look for it when i am dressing a future child. is that stupid? i mean, like she will say, "why don't you put the X outfit on him?" and i will be stuck, because i won't have it anymore.

here's to hoping that i have a girl next so that i won't have to worry about it...

and i feel really guilty that she went to the effort and expense to get these things for him, but HOW many times have i said that i HATE boys' clothing with footballs and "sport" written all over them!!! ugh!!

what would you do/what have you done?

[crl]

Can you put some of the outfits on him for just long enough to take a picture? Then you can give her the picture--this might stave off questions about the outfit. And if she does ask in the future, you could say something like, "Oh, he's so hard on his clothes. It must have gotten stained or something." Would this work?

[farsk]

Liza,

That's a tough one. I was going to recommend the picture, too, but then again, you don't want to encourage her to buy more of this type of clothing.

Would you feel comfortable saying something to the effect of since DS has already outgrown them, and because they really weren't your thing to begin with, you donated them to Goodwill? That way, she will get the message that you didn't like them, and can't complain because they're going to someone in need!

Good luck. That's a toughie!

[ShayleighCarsensMom]

Tell her that a friend of yours had a boy and you passed on a bunch of clothes so that they wouldnt just sit in boxes.....thats what I did and it worked great.

[lizajane]

ooooh... the "loaned it out" approach. i like that! i did actually loan out tons of stuff to a friend with a boy. but since he is so little and schuyler was so big, i only gave her newborns stuff. (since the rest of his clothes won't be the right size in the right season for this new baby.) but i can SAY that "i loaned a lot of stuff to baby chase" without lying, because i did! i just won't say WHAT i loaned to him and what i sold at a yard sale! (this stuff isn't nice enough for ebay!)

[tinkerbell1217]

I used to suck it up and put the outfits on him only when we were visiting relatives who bought the stuff. It killed me to do it, but I did, and as soon as he outgrew it I took it to consignment.


Kelly

[redhookmom]

Whatever you do, do not store in kids dresser!

One morning my DH got DS dressed for preschool. Put on shirt from Grandma, that I hated and DS had never worn. I was going to change him but was running late so I just brought him to school in the "ugly" shirt. Well I wrote the wrong day on the calander for school pictures...

The "ugly" shirt was made out of some icky fabric, and had a football, soccerball, and basketball on it with SPORTS written across the bottom. So I guess we dislike the same stuff.

[Vajrastorm]

Gack! This is a topic close to my heart...

Both my mother and my MIL like things that make me want to gauge out my eyes.

I was adament in the beginning about not putting Aine in things I hated, but I still feel guilty for the time my MIL brought over an outfit (she going to watch Aine for an hour or two while hubby and I had rare together time) and she asked if it would be okay if she put her in it and took some pictures :( My MIL may have horrible taste but she's very sweet, and I am still ashamed that she was that hungry to see Aine in something she had bought.

Now I make an effort to give up some control over this and think about pleasing others, Yes, I don't always like it, but it harms no one and pleases many. For instance, my grandmother recently died and I let my mom pick out an outfit for Aine to wear to the memorial. Too much lace and ick for my tastes, but it gave my mom some happiness at a rough time. So a whole bunch of relatives got to meet Aine for the first time wearing an outfit I don't like ... but it doesn't matter.

I am still struggling over the issue of what to do with outgrown clothing. I'd love to sell it/give it away, but I'm worried if another baby comes along my MIL/mother will be hurt that the "special" things they picked out are no longer around.

Edited due to horrible typing

[AngelaS]

My mil often gives us things that my kids don't wear. But since Grandma lives 2000 miles away, the chances of her acutally being AROUND to see my kids wear the clothes are VERY slim!

I either return them or pick one outfit from the lot for them to wear in her presence and dispose of the rest later. :D I too don't put clothes I don't like on my girls.

[deborah_r]

i mean, like she will say, "why don't
>you put the X outfit on him?" and i will be stuck, because i
>won't have it anymore.

You could say they had an unfortunate bleach accident! That could work for a couple of outfits, but not all of them (I think she'd catch on!)

[memedee]

I am a grandmother and I buy tons of clothing for my daughter in laws son as well as my daughters son.
If either of them did not like the clothing I would hope that they would just tell me the truth as in "these are very cute but not my style"
Then "Thank you so much for buying thing but I really love the way baby looks in :preppy clothes,clothes from the Gap.clothes from old navy or pick something very descriptive so she knows what you do like.
I would be more upset over wasting money than being told the truth.

[Sarah1]

With my own mom, I don't worry about it.

With my MIL, I take a picture of DD in whatever outfit (fortunately the clothes she sends I usually like!) and send/e-mail the picture so she can see it. It means so much to her, and as atrocious as you may think the clothes are, there is a thought behind it and that counts for something. I try to remember that I may be a grandparent someday!

After wearing it once and taking a picture (this is assuming it at least fits), I don't worry about it. If she ever asked about it in the future, I'd just say you loaned it out, etc, which is a great idea (I can't remember which poster recommended that!). It'd probably make her feel good that another little boy was getting use out of it.

[lizajane]

that's the thing, dori. i HATE to think of anyone wasting money. i can't STAND to think that she spent too much on something that he will never wear. almost always, she buys sale stuff, outlet stuff or clearance stuff, so cost is not an issue. she is spending $5 or less! and i do like some things she gets and i am really happy to have them.

but i can't tell you how many times i have said OVER AND OVER to her that i can't stand boy clothes with sport stuff all over it or words like sport and champ. i have said it over and over and over and over again. and still for christmas, he gets an outfit with SPORT written across the front with footballs ALL OVER IT. ????????? can i be MORE specific than, "i hate boy clothes with "sport" or "champ" written on them with footballs or baseballs all over it???"

and he got a baseball uniform pj set for his birthday!!! yuck!!!!!!