Another question about sleep

[cuca_]

Seems like this is my favorite topic. DD is about to turn 1, and she is nowhere near sleeping through the night. If anything, things have gotten worse. The last time I posted a sleep question some of you recommended No Cry Sleep Solution, which I bought. It really helped us a lot in some respects. DD is now consistently taking a 2-21/2 nap and goes to bed around 6:30. However, we are still having big night time sleep problems. She will wake up at least 4 times after going down. She wakes up at least twice between 7:00 and 9:00 pm. Sometimes she'll wake around 1:30 and most days she wakes up around 3:00. When she wakes up earlier in the night, it just seems like she can't get settled. I usually pat her, but most often rock/swing her in my arms, and this usually works. When she wakes up at 1:30 (she'll also wake up around 5:00 if this is the case) she will drink a bottle each time she wakes up. The same thing if she wakes up around 3:00.

I would love to sleep through the night, but I have no idea of how to achieve this. It might be the lack of sleep, but I'm not getting the method suggested in the No Cry Sleep Solution. I definitely don't want to do CIO. We tried it briefly, it did not work for us, plus I don't feel comfortable with this method. I know it has worked for many, but I'm pretty sure it is not for us.

Many people have told me that she probably is drinking the nightime bottles for comfort. However, I sort of disagree. She really sucks them down fast, and settles back to sleep as soon as she is done.

If you are still reading, THANK YOU. I would appreciate any suggestions regarding methods, books to read, etc... This lack of sleep is really taking a toll on DH and I. You should see the circles under my eyes. Thank God for concealer!

Thanks for reading.

Carmen

[Jen in Chicago]

I find comfort in your posting b/c Jude is still waking. We had 4 nights of sleeping through the night, and that has ended. He has a cough right now, so we promptly run to him b/4 he hacks up a lung. We do CIO do a point, and I think that is why we are now down to one waking. He has stopped sucking down his bottles, so I realized the wakings were habit, not need, so I enforced Dr Weissbluth.

I don't really know what to say, but I hear ya and you are not the only ones.

[flagger]

Carmen,

I am sorry you are going through this situation. I do have to agree with some people who say that she is probably drinking out of habit. Have you tried substituting water for formula or EBM?

We found after about four days she no longer bothered to get up.

[ncmommy]

What about her eating habits during the day? I have found that DS wakes hungry during the night if for some reason we skipped snacks or he just wasn't interested in eating much at meals during the day. Maybe you can try "tanking her up" with extra food in the afternoons? Just a thought, it might help her break the habit of needing a bottle at night.
Good luck! I feel your pain!

[713abc]

In addition to trying water instead of milk as suggested above, could you also try putting her to sleep later, like 7pm or 7:30? That may cut out one of the wakings. We found, when my DS was just starting to sleep through the night, he would regress back to waking up if we put him to bed before 7pm. Sometimes it was hard to keep him up but we did it and it seemed to help.

I also think that even if she seems hungry and like she needs the food during the night, if she didn't have those bottles she would most likely adjust and eat more during the day instead.

Good Luck!!

Mom to Max, 05/28/03

[cuca_]

Thanks for your answers and recommendations. Jen, I guess it is somewhat reassuring to know that there are others in the same boat. When you say you do CIO to a point, what do you mean? Maybe this is something I should try. Flagger, thanks for the sympathy and for the suggestion. I guess I can try switching her formula to water. Nothing to lose right. Now I just have to convince DH. He is certain that she is waking up because she is hungry, as he often wakes up hungry himself and has to drink milk or something. I must admit that their sleep habits seem similar. I, on the other hand, would sleep like a log where it not for DD.

As for the others suggestions, I don't think I can tank her up on food. She is pretty emphatic about how much she eats. And she eats fairly well.

Thank you again for all the suggestions.

Carmen

[amp]

My initial thoughts are to push her bedtime back a bit....maybe 7:30 or so? My son is almost one and he goes to bed between 7-8:30 most nights. It used to be consistently 7 pm until we hit daylight savings, and now it's later, but we have absolutely no problem getting him down once we see the sleep signals in him and once we give him his bedtime bottle. Now I know, I'm going to have to get him off that bottle sometime after he turns 1, but that's another story. Is your child taking a bottle or nursing right before bed? If so, how much, and does she finish what you give her? If she's finishing it, perhaps you can increase the amount. Another thing we tried for awhile when DS was waking in the night is to wake and feed her before you go to bed. This can backfire and the kids might be up then, but for us it worked long enough to get him back sleeping through the night. For the night bottles, is she finishing those? Maybe give her more at one time? If she leaves some in the bottle, then she's probably getting full. If you've already considered all of this, I apologize. I was also against crying it out and chose to feed Jake when he woke hungry. I also believe his was less habit than hunger since he hungrily sucked down 6 oz. and fell back to sleep easily. Good luck with this!

[StaceyKim]

I agree with some other posters....stop giving her formula at night. She probably takes it out of habit. I would start giving her water and then slowly take that away as well. We made a habit of NOT picking up DS when he woke up in the middle of the night. We went in and talked briefly to him and then left the room. Sometimes he cries briefly but goes back to sleep. We have never let DS cry more than 10 minutes and we would go in to check on him but not pick him up. I am sure if we offered him a bottle he would take it but more as a comfort not as a necessity.
HTH


ETA: It's not good to give them milk or formula while they are sleeping anyway, because it could cause tooth decay.

[Jen in Chicago]

3 or 4 times he cried for an hour, and then I got him. Now he cries 0-10 minutes (3 min. average) and calms himself. It is amazing!

We have also tried playing with his bedtime, but found we needed to give each time change 3 nights. He needs to be in bed asleep by 7:00, he may wake 1-2 times at which time we decide if we are going to answer it (cold/growth spirt so we go to him once a night) and he wakes up at 6am like and alarm clock each day. We can not get longer than 6am. He is goes to bed at 7:15 he wakes b/n 5:00 and 5:30... Dr Weissbluth explains this in the book. I hate to admit it, but the book is right.

I am not good at always enforcing the book as Dr Weissbluth says, but it is a comfort to know Jude's behaviors are common and predictable. I swear parts of the book are just about Jude.

[cuca_]

Thanks everyone. Now we have to decide what we will do. Actually, her pediatrician recommended moving her bedtime, as some of you suggested. Also, she said that I should give DD one of my shirts to sleep with, and that this might help her settle down when she wakes up. We will see. I will keep you posted.

Carmen

[ethansmom]

You're certainly not alone!

I have read all of the sleep books...I "think" it was Ferber who recommended reducing the amount of each night feeding gradually. (ie, cut back by one ounce each night) I know CIO is a hot topic, and even though we don't do it, I did find Ferber's book somewhat helpful/informative.