Toy guns.....

[muskiesusan]

An offshoot from the gun threads, will you let you child play with toy guns? We went to a party last weekend and I was shocked to see all the kids running around with toy guns. They looked so real to me, which also surprised me. I wouldn't let Nick play with them, and the other mothers didn't understand why.

Susan
Mom to Nick 10/01/01
& Alex 04/27/04

[toomanystrollers]

We don't allow toy guns either - but turning sticks into guns is a different story, sigh...

[Tondi G]

I started out with the No Guns Idea but thats long gone! Kids will make sticks, fingers, ANYTHING into Guns. They see them in Disney Movies and on tv. Many other little kids have and play with guns.... DS didn't understand why he couldn't have one too! My DH has a couple of guns and if they haven't been sold by the time Mason is old enough to learn about them he will be shown how to safely be around firearms by his dad! We have told Mason it is not ok to point the toy guns at people.... they are for shooting rattlesnakes and monsters only! He usually only is able to play with them at home.... we don't take them places! he is pretty much over his gun thing now and on to swords thanks to seeing The Three Musketeers!!!!

~Tondi and Mason 7/8/01

[redhookmom]

It is absolutely amazing how little boys are attracted to swords and guns. It has been a "battle" in my house. I went into parenting a boy thinking there would be no toy weapons in my house...

A few weeks ago MIL bought ds a sword at the fair (plastic and foam). That night when he was going to bed he had it with him. I suggested to him that he put it on his nightable. He told me that his weapons dissapear when he goes to sleeep so he was going to sleep with it. And, I thought he didn't notice.

A great book to read that I have borrowed from the library a couple of times is: Who's calling the shots? :how to respond effectively to children's fascination with war play and war toys / Nancy Carlsson-Paige, Diane E. Levin

It gave me some really good ideas on how to deal with this issue.

[daisymommy]

I'll be interested in hearing what other moms have to say about this...

When my brother was growing up, my parents had a "no guns" policy in the house. But the loophole was my brother could create "sting rays" with blocks, sticks, whatever, that could temporarily imobolize the bad guys in their tracks, just long enough for the good guys to escape. But no playing "real guns" that could hurt someone or kill them. He seemed okay with it, and it was a compromise with my parents.

Now, I was talking to a good friend of mine, who has 3 boys. She was planning an Army theme bithday party for her oldest son who is 5 yrs. I was very surprised that she was buying him a toy gun to go with his party outfit. She is a very strict religious gal, so it just seemed pretty opposite of what I would expect from her. But when I talked to her about how she handles the "gun situation" with her boys, she said she has stopped fighting it, and has just let them pretend.
She told me she went to a parenting seminar, where a famous author and child psychologist (who has 4 boys himself) spoke. He said that there really isn't anyway you can fight it. It so ingrained in little boys nature and instincts to be the hunters, that they will always play guns with whatever they can find, even if it's behind your back. Wow. I was shocked to hear that he said this.

I guess my kids will have to do their gun playing behind my back, because I certainly am not going to encourage it.

[brubeck]

I haven't bought a gun yet, but DD is going to be Prince Phillip (from Sleeping Beauty) for Halloween. Her costume comes with a nice sword and shield and I KNOW she is going to love it when she sees it.

We brought back this stuffed samurai sword from Japan that squeaks and she runs around with it and a box lid with a handle calling it her sword and shield. The other day she took some of those cheapy velcro wallets and strapped them around her arms like bracers. It was very cute, but there's also no denying that she wanted to be a 'warrior'. My DD the tomboy, LOL. The armor sure goes well with her Hanna dresses! :)

[lizajane]

no guns.

i realize i will have to work hard.

in the same way that i work hard to keep him from sugar. i get PLENTY of naysayers about the sugar issue and i am still holding strong!

[ddmarsh]

My sons are 12, 10 and almost 6 and we still do not purchase or have weapons/guns in our house. Honestly it's never been much of an issue since they just got used to the idea that we didn't allow them. Occasionally they try and ask for one but I matter of factly reiterate the rule. Once in a while a gun has shown up here either b/c they brought it home from someone else's home or someone left it here and eventually I just quietly get rid of it.

I really have never minded that they use a stick, cheese or their fingers to pretent and have never tried to fight that. My real issue is not so much pretend play as it is pretend play using replicas of grown up weapons. I also would never say that they are not allowed to play with them at others' homes and while they certainly go right for those things while visiting it's clear to them that some people have them in their homes but we don't.

[proggoddess]

Hmmm, I think DH and I had a discussion about this once. (Not that DD is old enough yet but...) I don't think we'll buy her any toy guns. But when she is over the age of 11 or 12, if she wants to learn how to use a gun for its proper use, like hunting or target practice, we will take her for lessons.

DH owns a small rifle that is kept away and unloaded. He believes that a gun is a tool, just like a knife, hammer, or drill. When you're old enough, you'll learn how to use it properly. In the meantime, sticks will have to do.

[tigalig]

No guns here either. I grew up with guns in my house and I never thought twice about it, but being in the legal field (both DH and I) has made us both paranoid about children playing with guns. DS has a cowboy outfit with an empty holster and he thinks it's a pocket (he's three).

We were also at WDW last April and there was a boy (about 7) with a toy machine gun, pretending to shoot at the crowds. I was really bothered by that kind of play (reminiscent of Columbine to me) and it reinforced my desire to keep toy guns out of our house. We have friends who don't think twice about it and poke fun at us for being a "no toy gun" family, but you have to do what you think is best for you. If our son points his finger at me and pretends to shoot, I'll probably faint . . . lol

[MelissaTC]

I am certainly not a fan of guns by any means. But it amazes me how my 2 yr old is fascinated with water guns and other weapon toys. I certainly don't allow him to watch violent tv or cartoons. He doesn't play with children who have such items. I do think that there is some sort of instinctual thing. I had pop guns when I went through my cowgirl phase. I certainly never wanted to hurt anyone or kill anyone for that matter. I loved the way it smoked and it made me feel like I was in "Little House on the Prairie"(yes I was a HUGE fan!). I would buy DS a water gun but I would not purchase him anything that looks like a real gun. But I know it is going to be an uphill battle, especially when he and his little best guy friend are already play fighting with sticks and blocks, etc... *sigh*

[lisams]

No guns, no video games using them, etc. I suppose it will be easier since I have a girl, but if there is a boy in our future, he will know that we will not allow guns of any kind in the house. I'm sure he'll use his finger or a stick but the rule will be no matter what, NO pointing at a person or animal even if it's his finger.

lisa

[SeekerMage]

That is a tough question....I have to say that I dont mind them so much, granted I have girls who arent into shooting, but when the time comes, I dont think I mind them having guns. They know that guns hurt and kill and not to go near a real one etc, but toy guns dont do any harm in the pretend world. On the other hand I do not like swords and sticks. We had a friend who was adamant about NO GUNS but would let her son play with sticks and swords which he would then take and "died" you with them. Lets just say that DH and I suffered several bruises with this kind of play as he was not so gentle. Guns, while in the real world are violent, in the pretend world do no harm. Its an oxymoron considering, but at the same time I would rather pretend play which doesnt cause bruises then chancing a poked out eye. Maybe Im wrong, but we all take our chances as parents.

[pamela mom of 3]

Ds doesn't have any, but if he were to ask for some it really isn't something that i wouldn't buy then.

I guess i am neutral on the whole topic, i see both sides but i think i choose to fall into the middle, i won't run out nor encourage "gun play" but i won't bend overbackwards to stop it either.

As parents we have to decide what our comfort zone is, i am not so sure their is a "proper" answer ;) more just what feels right for that family.

~Pamela Mom to the Trio Of Trouble http://smilies.jeeptalk.org/otn/angels/newangel.gif



http://lilypie.com/baby4/010103/0/5/3/-6/.png

[pritchettzoo]

A little boy I used to baby-sit (now in college! yikes!) was not allowed toy guns. One night he pointed his toy drill at us and said, "Stick 'em up. Please!" He must have learned this from other kids; he didn't watch television and was about 3 or 4. He also used spoons and stuffed animals to hold us up, but at least he was polite about it. ;)

I wouldn't allow toy guns either. To me, it teaches children that guns are toys. Imaginary guns are hard to ban, and they're an entirely different animal IMO.

Anna

[KBecks]

I'll definitely allow my child squirt guns and super-soakers that are fun colors and don't look like real guns.

I'll probably also allow toy guns that are funky colors and don't look like real guns and shoot things like ping-pong balls.

I'd even let my older child have a BB gun and a target box to practice with. No killing birds or chipmunks though!

It's important for kids to understand make-believe vs. real. I'd probably hold off on toy guns until the kid is old enough to get the difference.

Our son will go through hunter safety courses when he's old enough and then his dad and our extended family will teach him about hunting safely.

I am more concerned about sex and violence on TV and in videogames, etc., and will work to avoid having DS see too much. It will be difficult.

Also, I'm going to try an limit sugar, soda and unhealthy snacks.

KBecks

[MartiesMom2B]

I think I'm on the same level as KBecks. I don't think I was allowed to play with toy guns that looked like guns but was allowed to play with waterguns and nerf guns.


-Sonia

[amazz]

I was at our college football game today and thought about this post. We are the Red Raiders and have several mascots, one of whom is Raider Red (think Yosemite Sam dressed as a cowboy with spurs, guns, the whole nine yards.) And our motto or whatever is "Get Your Guns UP!" And when the fight song, school song, grandioso are played or when there is an excellent football play every one gets their guns up (make an "L" with your first finger and thumb and angle your hand to the right). The big floppy foam fingers are sold like that and the other popular foam accessory is a foam gun. I honestly had never thought anything about it until today. I still think those things are ok because we never "shoot" any person, just point up in the air. Though, now that I think about it, at the beginning of the game there is this little computer graphic animation on the big screen that has the Masked Rider (another mascot) shooting opponents. I think they get away with it because the opponents are actual footballs with belt buckles that signify which team they represent. Because of the part of the country we live in I think it is impossible to avoid guns, so I think you have to educate about what is ok and what is not ok. It does give me a lot to think about though.

Angela
EDD 10/15/04
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. ~Carl Sandburg

[californiamom]

I don't like guns and am pretty anti-gun -- we don't own one and I wouldn't let my children play in someone else's house unsupervised if I knew they had a gun.

I do agree, though, that it is pretty close to impossible to avoid children (especially DS) from wanting one. My mom was a psychoanalyst and I remember once she told me if it is unavoidable, just make sure the gun looks clearly to be a toy gun and it doesn't look and feel like a real one. For example, a bright blue and yellow plastic water gun would be OK. So, that's what I am planning on doing if/when I find myself in this situation...

Ana