My baby is sick

[Vajrastorm]

and it is my fault. :(

Everyone keeps telling me babies get sick, that it happens. I know that. I also know that I didn't listen to my own instincts and disregarded my own reasoning.

We have really good friends with a baby Aine's age. They were sick last week, the week before Aine's birthday party. First the little boy got sick, then his mom, then his dad. I did some math towards the end of the week, and realized there was a good chance one of the would still be infectious at her party on Sunday.

By Sunday they were all feeling fine, and I wanted them there so badly - so I forgot about my concerns. Pushed them aside. La-la-la not listening.

Last night Aine started vomiting around 3 a.m. (Right according to when my math would have predicted) This is a nasty flu-like bug, with plenty of vomiting and diarrhea. I know how hard it was for my friend to try and keep her baby hydrated enough. I worried (over the phone) about him. For first time moms, it is the kind of sickness that freaks you out.

I don't blame my friends at all - they thought they were over it. *I* however knew better. *I* chose to put my desire to have them at our party over Aine's welfare. And the welfare of all the other kids there.

I have been told not to blame myself. How can I not blame myself? If I hear that any of the other party goers get sick, I will feel even worse.

yours from guilt-city,

[kthomp]

Oh Andrie,

I can't tell you how many times I have done the same thing! *Overlooked* sickness hoping that either she wouldn't catch it or they were really over it.

Obviously, you really wanted them at your party. There is nothing wrong with that! And I'm sure it was a great party!

You can never be sure what they are going to catch and what they aren't. Last Christmas Ally played with my dad a lot, and he was still sick, and she never caught a thing. A few months ago she touched my friend's daughter ONCE at the park and caught her throw up bug. You just can't tell when it will happen and when it won't.

No, it isn't your fault! All you are guilty of is wanting to have your friends over! And if you want to look at the *bright side*, it will help her immune system in the future!

Hugs mama!

[alkagift]

Oh, don't fret! I totally understand what you mean but I agree that you can't always predict what your baby will "get" or not. My DH was so sick two weeks ago that we had to take him to the emergency room--severe dehydration with the awful vomiting, etc. He stayed at home for three days and my son never got it. How, I have no idea. However, I took DS to a new playgroup at a mom's home last week and someone's child must have been sick, as two days later my pumpkin woke up hysterical because he was so congested he couldn't breathe.

Don't worry, it happens! You're not a bad mom!

Allison
Mommy to Matthew Clayton, 5/03