Questions for Weissbluth followers

[simba]

DS is 6 months tomorrow.
I have two questions about the Weissbluth method, which I am following.

NAPS:
Weissbluth says not to force the third nap. But if DS doesn't take a third nap, which often happens, he is out for the night by 5 PM, a little early! Does anybody follow the nap *procedure* for the third nap as well?

NIGHT WAKINGS:
Weissbluth says babies up to 9 months may need to feed twice over a 12-hr night period. My son wakes up more than that, but I only go to him twice, usually at around 11-11:30 and then 3:30-4:00. The other times I CIO (he has been crying less and less). My concern is that he may get confused by the fact that I go to him some times and not others. Since consistency is key, I don't think I am helping him to learn to fall back asleep on his own. Since some times I do indeed go to him, from his point of view, why shouldn't he cry?
A part of me thinks that if I didn't go in at all, than the message would be really clear and he would learn fast(er).
But Weissbluth says that up to two night feedings is age-appropriate. What do you ladies do?
I noticed that he really eats a lot at the 11PM waking (hence I would never eliminate this feeding), but not so much at the 3:30 one. And even if he wakes up/feeds later than 3:30, like at 4:30, he is still up for the day by 6AM, like if this feeding didn't make any difference. Any suggestions on *decoding* Weissbluth on this?

Becasue of these two (IMO) *inconsistencies* (DS decides whether there is a third nap + DS gets fed twice per night but CIO all the other times, I think I am not being as successful as I could be. It is taking too long. He still cries. I am willing to let him CIO (and I do it) but not if i don't get results. I am getting results, but not in one week, like he states! The amount of crying for naps has seriouly decreased a lot, but today he unexpectedly cried for the WHOLE hour at the second nap ...and I feel so horrible I can barely eat!

Weissbluth followers, please help!
Silvana

[Momof3Labs]

I like Weissbluth a lot, but acknowledge that it doesn't work for every child. Unfortunately, none of our babies have read the book!

Your DS may have something else going on - teething, developmental spurt, growth spurt - that is interrupting his night sleep. Or he hasn't learned how to soothe himself to sleep. Does he use a pacifier or have a lovey? What does it take to put him back to sleep when you go to him?

Regarding naps, we never worried about a third nap and usually didn't get one. Colin sometimes went to bed at 5pm, usually by 6pm at that age - I didn't see a problem with that. What time do you want your DS to go to bed?

[mudder17]

I agree with Lori that our babies have not read Weissbluth; they don't know what they're supposed to do. Kaya is almost 10 months and I still feed her 1-2 times a night, even though Weissbluth says most babies after 9 months can go the whole night without eating. However, we're so busy during the day, I'm not sure that Kaya would get enough if I cut out the night feedings right now.

We had difficulty with the 3rd nap and finally had to cut it out because it was so much easier for Kaya to just go to bed around 5 p.m. She was generally happier and did better with the earlier bed time and no third nap. Right now we're working on adjusting her schedule so that her long nap is in the afternoon rather than in the morning and it's causing her to fight her bed time, so it may be that if she gets the longer nap in the afternoon (which Weissbluth says is more restful than a long morning nap), she can go to bed a little later.

For night wakings, as long as Kaya eats and goes off to sleep or at least doesn't expect me to entertain her, I will probably continue feeding her 1-2 times a night. I am considering, after I get back from Christmas vacation, of cutting out one of the night feedings, but we'll see how that goes.

In terms of the 6 a.m. wake up time, I don't think he wakes up at 6 a.. because he's hungry, but because it's time for him to wake up. In other words, even if he feeds the second time at 3:30 vs. 5:00, I don't think it would make a difference in his wake up time.

And just so you know, Kaya has fed 1-2 times a night at times varying from 8:45 - 4:30. She goes to bed around 5 (although as I mentioned, she may be going to bed a little later soon) and gets up at around 6-6:45, depending on many factors.

Eileen

Mother of Beautiful Kaya, www.chemicalgraphics.com/kaya
http://www.babysfirstsite.org/newtickers/ticker/16994.birthday.png

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_amber_9m.gif Breastfed 9 months and counting

[simba]

He has a pacifier and a lovey.
When I go to him at 11 or 11:30 , it is easy to put him back to sleep. He just feeds and falls immediately back to sleep. The second (3:30) time he is fully awake, but the swing will do the trick in 20 minutes top. So that is not the problem.
When I don't go to him, it takes him 2 up to 20 minutes of crying to fall back asleep.

I am actually fine with DS to go to bed at 5, I just worry becasue he is waking up earlier an earlier in the am. But according to W., going to bed early is not the culprit. Probably Luca is just an early riser! Did Colin really go to sleep that early at that age???? And then what happened? I am totally fine, actually that allows me to do some work....And both DH and I work at home, so we see DS all day, therefore it's fine if he goes to bed at 5! I feel better now.... Thanks!

[simba]

WOW, thanks for your answers, both of you!
I am really reassured now....
If you guys feel 5 PM is not too early (people frown when I mention it), then I won't feel alone....
And I can stop fighting for that third nap!
You are both very sweet!
Silvana

[steph2003]

I get a lot of frowns/raised eyebrows when people learn my DS goes to bed around 7pm! let alone 5pm :) so I can relate - but I'm a big believer in doing what is right for your child. So if bedtime is 5pm then so be it! Little kids need their sleep. I think Weissbluth comments on this that some babies/children stay up later & later because of the parents schedules ie they don't get home from work until 6pm or whatever....but if putting your child to bed at 5pm works for you, then do it!

Griffin is an early riser no matter the bedtime 6pm, 7pm, 8pm...actually he has much better naps the following days we get him into bed by 7pm. Personally I like the extra free time in the evenings to get my stuff done :)