When do I stop giving my nephews birthday gifts?

[deborah_r]

My sister's oldest son just turned 21. Do I stop giving him birthday gifts now? I can't see continuing to send him birthday presents when he's married! My family does not do gifts between siblings at birthdays, everyone gifts children, parents gift adult children, adult children gift parents (if they can afford it!) I don't know what to do about an adult nephew. My sister has two more boys that will be following right behind him, so I need to make a plan and be consistent!

[kalebsmama]

We have 15 nieces/nephews between us, so this has been something on my mind too. What I decided to do, was stop giving gifts as they graduate from high school. I never received gifts from my aunts/uncles after that point. I still send them cards to let them know we're thinking of them, but they are old enough to not be disappointed by not getting a gift.
I have been thinking of sending a care-package to all the ones in college at some point. Maybe some cookies and other goodies. But it won't be related to birthdays - I'll just do them all at one time. Currently 3 are in college, 3 more are seniors in HS and the oldest just graduated college. So, my list of gift-giving is shrinking! Of course, 1 hasn't even started school yet so we have a long time left!!

[firsttimemommy]

I also quit giving gifts at 18 - they are "adults" and no longer kids and we don't exchange gifts between adult siblings at birthdays either. I love your idea of an occasional care package though - that would be so sweet and I'm sure very appreciated!

Ronda
Proud Mommy to Jenna Leigh 1/03 and Jake 4/04

"If you live to be 100, I want to live to be 100 minus one day, so I never have to live without you" ~ Winnie the Pooh

[mamaturk]

In my family, we stopped getting gifts once we had children. Our family now buys for the kids holidays and birthdays.

[steph2003]

I was wondering the same thing - as we have two older nieces. In my mind I was thinking 18/after H.S. graduation.

Of course we just found out my oldest niece is pregnant at 16 :( (yes, that is a WHOLE other post!!!) so I'm not sure what I'll do for her going forward!

[C99]

In my husband's family, his grandparents stopped doing gifts for the grandkids when my husband (the youngest of the oldest 3) finished college. However, his grandparents are a little forgetful now and sent *me* a birthday check last year (but not my husband or son!).

[kathsmom]

We had this situation as well. DH is the youngest in his family by a 15 year age difference, so our nephews are all older than our kids. We stopped giving to our oldest nephew (who just turned 28) when he was 25. We probably should have stopped when he graduated college.

We have a nephew who is 18 and another who is 15. We will probably continue to give them gifts until they graduate from college.

[deborah_r]

Thanks for the feedback so far. I thought about the college cut-off, but my sister's 2nd son does not want to go to college, and also some kids stay in college until 22, others until 25 or 28, etc. I guess high school would have been a good time to stop...but I didn't!

[McQ]

I actually still get gifts (cash) from my aunt/uncle. We're a small family though with only one aunt/uncle on one side and one aunt on the other. DH is an only and I only have 2 cousins, so real small.

Allison
~ mama to Declan 3.24.03 and Meghan 8.26.04

[new_mommy25]

I stopped getting gifts when I had DS. I still get birthday cards.