Moms of two--I need your insight

[Sarah1]

If you were to hire someone part-time, when and how often would you have them come? How would you "divide and conquer" the childcare duties w/the person? Just looking for some insight. Thanks.

Edited to add--starting in Sept., Audrey will be going to preschool MWF from 9-11:30 AM.

[Marisa6826]

I have my sitter come Monday and Thursday from 8-2pm. She is my respite from the weekend, and then gives me a much needed break mid-week.

She bathes the girls, does their laundry, feeds them, takes them outside. She also gets them down for a nap before she leaves. That way, I get a nap myself and additional 2-3 hours before I have to deal with Hurricane Sophie. ;)

Eileen will come with me to the Ped, or park/zoo so that I can chase Sophie and not worry about Mia.

HTH

-m

[Phoebe]

Well, I don't have anyone come, but if I did I would want them to come in the morning, say 8 or 9 until 1pm. I wouldn't want a sitter here when my son is napping. 8-1 once or twice a week would be great. I would use that time to do all my grocery shopping and errands.

You'll have a newborn, so are you planning to be home while the sitter's there? Maybe they could play with Audrey and let you and the baby sleep. That's what I would have wanted when my son was little.

Mary
DD 4/01
DS 6/03

[JMS]

I not actually a mom of two yet, but I've been pondering this same thing lately. DH wants me to get "help" when the new baby arrives (if not sooner) and I'm trying to figure out the best way to get the most out of this person's time.

Honor won't start school until the fall of 2006 but my thought process is to start a routine that will also work then. What would be my ideal would be to have the sitter's time overlap with Honor's school hours so that I could drop her off and pick her up without lugging the baby along. Then while she's at school I could run errands, go to the gym, go home and rest or even clean my house. I might also have a sitter come one additional day for a few hours so I can have a little 'me' time. DH and I also want to establish a set "date night". Either a Wed. or Thurs. night where we would do something for just the two of us. But I don't think we'll be at that point until the baby gets a little older and has some sort of routine going.

[g-mama]

Sarah, I am trying to figure this situation out, too. DH and I agreed that I could get some regular help when this baby is born, preferably a little before so the kids get used to her. I cannot figure out how to best schedule the time. Will I be comfortable leaving the new baby with a sitter when I have not done that in the past? Or do I really just want the sitter to handle the older two so I can focus on the baby? Maybe a little bit of both, I guess.

Like the pp, I am thinking it would be nice to have someone there in the morning even though my oldest ds would be going to preschool so that I don't have to lug three kids in and out with me five days a week, esp in the winter. Maybe you want to consider that?

I was thinking a few hours each day, but my good friend has a nanny come two full days a week (9-5) and says she loves knowing she has those entire days "off" to take care of errands, haircuts, or even lunch with a friend.

I don't think I've been of much help, I'm kind of thinking out loud. Let us know what you decide to do!


Kristen
Paolo 11-00
Benjamin 8-03
and a third one coming in december '05!

[Sarah1]

>>Like the pp, I am thinking it would be nice to have someone
>there in the morning even though my oldest ds would be going
>to preschool so that I don't have to lug three kids in and out
>with me five days a week, esp in the winter. Maybe you want
>to consider that?
>
This is how I've been leaning. We are currently in a walk-up building (up almost 4 flights of stairs) so coming and going with two kids is going to be a SERIOUS challenge--I really want and need to minimize outings with both kids at once because all the stairs are going to be tough. My thinking is that if I have someone come from like 8-2 on those three preschool days, I can get all my errands done and have some time to myself. Also, the baby would be home to take a morning nap and his/her schedule wouldn't be disrupted. And in the wintertime, like you said, lugging kids in and out of the car is no easy task, esp since our parking is not covered and I have to deal with shoveling off the car if there is snow.

This is helpful...just thinking out loud like you said...

[mharling]

I have help 2 days a week for 6 hours at a time. So far, she has mostly been one on one with Lane. I usually use the time to run errands, but also do some things around the house (or sometimes nap with Faye). On one of her days, she is here during Lane's nap and does light housework. I gradually want her to spend more time with Faye so I can use that time to get out by myself. I honestly think it will be awhile before I leave her alone with both kids during a 'non-nap' time. I also schedule all of our dr's appointments, etc. during times she is here.

Feel free to e-mail me with any questions. If you can swing it, the help is wonderful! It's a true sanity saver for me.

Mary - Some days work. Some days don't.
Lane - April 2003
Faye - March 2005

[muskiesusan]

I have a girl come on Wednesday from 9-4. She is wonderful and I wish I would have done it sooner!!! I chose Wednesday since it is the middle of the week and I usually am burnt out by then. My usually DH travels M-TH, so that help me decide on Wed as well. My kids are older, so I can leave both of them for stretches of time, although Alex is still BF'd, so I can't leave for the entire day just yet.

The hardest part of this has been wanting to stay at home to get housecleaning done or just relaxing in bed. If I am around, the kids tend to come find, er, bug me (I have the same problem when DH works from home, they are always going into his office).


Susan
Mom to Nick 10/01
& Alex 04/04

[NEVE and TRISTAN]

I thought about this all night...I wanted to respond instantly when I read it but the more I thought I really didn't know what I'd chose-living thru you here I thought and thought about it...

I think for me someone in the afternoon would be best...
that is when I get kinda stir crazy. Luckily when Steve is in town he is home about 6 buthe is out of town often lately.

Hanging my head here I wake up later than most thought which might be why I wouldn't need the "coverage" in the morning though.

I've been thinking about you Sarah and hope all is well and that you are feeling well...keep us posted!!!!
Neve
Reichen (6), Karsh (3), Tristan (2) and baby girl Bronwyn born March 10th!!!!

[houseof3boys]

It's a great question! Here's our deal:

Ryan is in school M,T and R now from 9-12:00 and we go to the gym three times a week for an hour in the afternoon so both of the kiddos go to the daycare there. That hour or hour and a half at the gym is my relaxing time of the day and that's it! Not nearly enough time, but Riley won't take a bottle and she is a bear to put down to sleep now so I limit my time there. The huge challenge with a toddler and a newborn is entertaining the toddler. At 4.5 months now, Riley is not as easy as when she slept away the day and I could manage Ryan much easier. Going to the park is no longer easy and the grocery store, Target and general errands are exceedingly difficult with both of them. When Riley is out of her infant seat, I will be SOL and will wear her in the sling (she doesn't like it though) to run errands. I change both of their diapers at the same time since Ryan will actually say "change Ryan too" if he sees me changing her diaper and not his. I try to include him in everything with her and ask his opinion about stuff (just so he thinks he has some control) and will sing songs about what a great big brother he is to Riley. Of course, he still steps on her if she is lying down. He will try to pull her out of the bouncy seat and hit her in the head or poke her in the eye just for kicks. Then ten seconds later, he will hug her and kiss her! The emotional roller coaster of a toddler. :P

I think it would be ideal to have her come on Tuesday and Thursday for you in the afternoons when Audrey needs the energy burnoff and maybe the full morning on Wednesday (just because it is the middle of the week) when the baby is a few weeks old. Of course if you can have her for more hours, you will want too since you will be so tired and just the point of being able to nap is wonderful and impossible with Audrey around.

Some days are really tough, some are not so bad. :)