POLL QUESTION: Are you deleting all your pics are just ones of kiddos in diapers, naked etc....

[NEVE and TRISTAN]

I'm just curious...
I might regret my decision but for now only feel the need to delete diapered pictures and wondering if I am just feeling to comfortable. I've shared many pics over the years, few in diapers mainly because hubby doesn't take those on the only digital camera we have and well my stash is not awesome (dwats).

JUst wondering how others felt...and wonder if I might change my mind. But so far have only found one picture that I felt should be deleted.

Again a thank you to Rashmi for taking the time to help us all do this.

[BillK]

Sadly (other than my car seat install pics) I've deleted the few pics I recently posted. This deal kinda creeped me out.

[kalebsmama]

I'm deleting all that I can find and that are still able to be edited. I did ask for help in deleting an old one of DS in a diaper, but for now I will just leave the oder ones of the kids dressed alone.

Neve, I am wondering the same as you so I will be interested to see what others say.

Thanks to Marisa for getting rid of my diaper pic and thanks to Rashmi for helping out!

[amazz]

I didn't vote b/c I did a combo I guess. I deleted all the ones I could delete myself, but I had to really search for the ones that were too old to do myself, so I figure they are relatively safe. I'm just going with that denial right now. I know there are some people who have some old pics that they feel MUST be deleted (which I completely understand) so I don't want to make more work for Rashmi and Marissa if I don't really need to. Ok I'm going to stop rambling now...

Angela
Mama to Kami Allyse (10/10/04)http://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/otn/love/luvlove.gif[/IMG]
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. ~Carl Sandburg
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/candle.gif

[KrisM]

Until recently, I hadn't been deleting anything. But, in the past month or so, I started deleting after a week or two. So, I am deleting all recent photos regardless of what they are.

I did have the mods delete some diaper photos that I wasn't able to edit anymore. My old Christmas card photo remains though.

I'm trying not to be too paranoid about the whole thing.

[amp]

There was no option for not deleting pics. I don't think I've ever posted a dipe pic, and I'm frankly just not going to go find all my old posts to have them deleted. Perhaps if I had posted some diaper or nudie pics I might. I have always known this stuff is a possibility and I guess, after talking to DH last night, we just aren't going to worry too much about it. I know that may sound like I'm not concerned or that I don't care or want to protect my kid, but really that's not it at all. I just know that the pics I've posted are harmless pics, that already could have been used somewhere if someone were so inclinced and demented, and some could have been taken from our own personal website too. I try to be careful which pics I post, but I don't plan to never, ever post another picture again.

ETA: And I have over 6000 posts, so it might be much harder to delete all pics even if I searched and guessed right on the title of the post or whatever!

[starrynight]

I'm not deleting because all of mine are very old and I don't think I posted dipe pics here. I'm more worried about the few I posted at MDC.

This is the very reason I very rarely post pics or our names (besides mine) in public forums, this came up a few months ago especially with shutterfly because it displays your name. It's sad because so often I would like to show off the kids but it's not safe here or mdc. I keep it to very private yahoo groups or password protected forums.

[dr mom]

I didn't vote, since none of the cetegories fit. I'm probably in the minority here, but I'm not deleting anything.

Anytime you post pictures online, you're essentially putting them out into the public domain. BBB has always been open to anyone, and in addition to the 16,000 or so registered members, I'm sure there are an even greater number of lurkers that pass through. I'm not implying that we should restrict access - just making an observation that these forums are open to the public.

With that in mind, I have always considered carefully what information I was willing to share online - my real name? my child's name? my city? profession? family photos? Personally, I wasn't comfortable posting a birthdate for DS, or photos of him unclothed. Not criticizing others who have done differently...I just followed my gut about what I was willing to let strangers have access to.

Now suddenly there is an uproar because some unscrupulous, unethical, perverted individual has stolen images illegally from online. My heart goes out to the women who found their precious children's pictures being used in that way - what a terrible violation, and I would be horrified if it were my child. But it seems a bit late to panic and start pulling photos offline, when they've been publically available all along. The risks haven't changed, only our perceptions of them.

Although I have decided not to remove any photos, I completely understand the motives of those who feel differently and are removing all photos of their kids. It saddens me that one evil person could negatively impact the lives of so many. :(

[stillplayswithbarbies]

You can edit shutterfly so it does not display your name. Just put anything in there in place of your first and last name. I think I just have my initials in there.

[laretce6]

ITA with everything Andrea and Cindy have said. I may start deleting anything I post in the future after a week or two. I'm leaving my avatar alone (or updating it, I think that picture's about 8 months old LOL).

Caroline
Mama to Eleanor Katherine 8.2.04

[stillplayswithbarbies]

I have usually hosted pics at my AOL account and moved or renamed them periodically anyway, so I am not concerned at what else is here. Sometimes I attached pics and uploaded them here, but I tried not to do that too often.

Honestly, I am more concerned about pictures of myself. I was always careful not to post indentifying information about myself on a public forum, including this one, and never posted pictures of me. I've been stalked and threatened by an obsessed person online before and it was not fun. Since then I have been careful about who sees my picture and how much info I give out. That person who stalked me was able to call me at work just by knowing what city I live in and the type of industry I work in. A few random calls pretending to be a business associate and he had my last name. It would have been just one more step to stand outside my building and watch for me to walk out. It was a seriously scary situation and it all came about from similar discussions and debates like sometimes used to go on here and one person who took the online world a little too seriously.

So, I have always been careful about where pictures of myself and my children "live" on the internet.

edited to add: I didn't vote in the poll because my answer would be "my pictures are mostly under my own control on a private server where I can remove them as I wish"

I do want to say that if you are removing your pictures, it's not just diaper pictures that were on that fetish site. It was also pictures of fully clothed children. But then, anyone could be snapping your picture while you are at the park or the pool and doing who-knows-what with them. It's not legal for them to use your image online without a model release, but child molesters are not known for obeying the laws.

[Wife_and_mommy]

I'm with Cindy. I've only attached one newborn pic and was able to delete without help from the mods. I love seeing pics of all the beautiful babes on here and would love to share our dd with all but I just don't have it in me. It just creeps me out that strangers would have access. The normal regulars aren't who I worry about.

I'm also really paranoid about what I post. I will never post where I live--not even the state--because you'd be surprised how easy it is for information to be found about you. I'd never thought about dd's birthday but feel safe with it because our first names are so common. I would never post our last name. I think anyone I know IRL would be able to pinpoint us better with bday info if they were to spy on me but I've started watching what I say because of that.

It's absolutely pathetic that a community of moms, dads, and babies has to worry about such things but I chalk it up to the world we live in. How very sad.


Elizabeth

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif[/img][/url]

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/t/dogdogcrd20040405_4_My+child+is.png

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev035pb___.png
Our second morsel due early February 2006!

[Wife_and_mommy]

Karen,

That is absolutely crazy scary! Your post read like a horror movie! I'm sorry you were put through that.

Confirms for me why I'm so paranoid though. Thanks for sharing your story.


Elizabeth

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif[/img][/url]

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/t/dogdogcrd20040405_4_My+child+is.png

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev035pb___.png
Our second morsel due early February 2006!

[barbarhow]

Neve-I don't think I am going to remove my pics either. I don't have any nudies posted or any in butts either. DH and I talked about it and he agreed with me. I have shared quite a bit of myself and many pictures of the kids on line. Hopefully the sickos who have done this and rocked our little world will go away. Forever.
Barbara-mom to Jack 3/27/03, a Red Sox fan
and Anna 5/12/05, my little Yankee fan!

[tarahsolazy]

I don't post too many pics, but I did have a couple of dipe pics deleted, I'm not sure why. I've never posted pics at MDC, not in the "in" crowd there. I think I always knew this stuff was out there, and I consider the pics pretty much fair game, its the internet, after all. Not anything I want to think about, but there are sickos out there. I have probably posted too much information too, my first name, where I live, what I do. I could probably be found pretty easily. Well, no way to go back, but I'll sure be careful on any new boards I happen to use. It seems silly to stop using my first name, make an alias for my kid, here now, lots of folks "know" me.

[aliceinwonderland]

Karen,
that is absolutely horrific...I always have this nagging feeling, being a very opinionated person and all, that someone who does not agree with me will try to harm me and my family in some way...I hate to be motivated by fear though, hence my big mouth...I just need to shut up, basically.

May I ask (and obviously it's very understandable if you do not wish to answer), did this person stalking you originate on this or a similar message board??
e.

[murpheyblue]

I agree with what the PPs have said. I'm not a huge picture poster and have never posted DD in dipes (not that I have a problem with that but we don't CD and I rarely take a photo of her in a dipe). So I haven't been deleting anything as of yet. This whole incident is so disturbing.

[stillplayswithbarbies]

It was not on this board, it was years ago. It started on a board on AOL, and then moved to another forum and then he followed me to several Yahoo groups that were spun off from those forums.

There are crazy people on the internet. You think you are having an intelligent debate, and on the other end of the keyboard someone is really going "I'll show her once and for all who is right and who is wrong" and tracking down your info in order to make your life miserable.

[shishamo]

I'm also with Cindy. I've been always very careful about this, and I have only posted one picture in the past, I think. Internet is a scary place, you never know.

[ellies mom]

I started deleting pictures of DD a few weeks ago, but I did go back and find the rest that I could delete. I don't post very many of her. I think there are only two or three that I couldn't edit, and I won't bother with them.

[Phoebe]

I deleted everything I could find and got help for the older posts. Even if the pictures have been fair game for a while now, I see no reason to leave them hanging out there for more pervs to have a chance at them.

You know I get the feeling there's a fair amount of finger wagging at those of us who posted pictures. And it's sprinkled with equal doses of 'I told you so' and 'You should have know better'.

I knew these boards were public and that pornography proliferates on the internet. I just thought the BBB was an obscure little corner of the internet that no one but a mom would stumble across. I also knew nothing about diaper fetishes, or any other fetish for that matter. (The diaper thing.... it is so gross. If I weren't a mom, I would find it hilarious.)

Mary
DD 4/01
DS 6/03

[amp]

No finger pointing here. I've posted plenty of pics of my DS, but I'm not going to get up in arms and remove them by searching through 6000+ posts. I understand that some want to, but I feel like I posted them, knowing there were risks and knowing also that I can't insulate myself or my family from weirdos who are gonna do what they are gonna do. I think it's totally sick and wacked out, but I'm more concerned about the person who is watching me that I don't know about or who sees my kid at the playground. I am at just as much risk as anyone else here, but I find the thought of weeding through 6000+ posts because of one site we've become aware of to be daunting and a bit reactionary for me. I choose to just be more aware of the issue and to be careful when I do post pics and maybe think more about deleting the ones I add in the future after a week or days have passed.

[aliceinwonderland]

yeah, well, I've been so lax with posting info it borders on idiotic...

I'm totally self-censuring from now on. Big time.

Thanks for sharing your cautionary story!

e.

[amazz]

>>You know I get the feeling there's a fair amount of finger wagging at those of us who posted pictures. And it's sprinkled with equal doses of 'I told you so' and 'You should have know better'.

Yep, I was thinking the same thing. (fwiw, I didn't feel that from your post, Andrea.) I made a mistake by posting pics of my daughter. I feel bad enough about that, I don't need people telling me (however subtly) that I shouldn't have and should have known better. Well I certainly know better now and I would appreciate more support and less finger wagging. (sorry this has been bothering me all day!!)

Angela
Mama to Kami Allyse (10/10/04)http://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/otn/love/luvlove.gif[/IMG]
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. ~Carl Sandburg
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/candle.gif

[aliceinwonderland]

I agree. Yea, misjugdement on my part,my fault 100%, but it is very easy to be misled by the idea of a community, etc.

Honestly, I really hope the first pinned message stays there forever sort of as a "enter at your own risk" type thing so new posters may be reminded.

I kind of have a problem with not being able to edit one's own post at any point after it has been posted, but i guess it's just part of the price you pay and there's nothing to be done about that.

e.

[muskiesusan]

ITA, Andrea. I deleted a photo of Nick that was semi-nude, but only b/c I saw the thread had been bumped up by someone else. I, then deleted another, but decided to stop when I decided I didn't want to let these people affect my life like this. I fully understand why others would want to delete their pics and perhaps I would feel different if my kids were found on that site.

Perhaps I am naive, but I know there have been cases of pictures of kids being taken while going to school, at the playground, etc. and that doesn't stop me from visiting these places. I just pray I will be able to give my children the skills they need if they are ever in horrific situation.


Susan
Mom to Nick 10/01
& Alex 04/04

[Wife_and_mommy]

I can understand why you'd feel that way but I and I'm sure no one else is intending to come across with an "I told you so" attitude.

I guess I've watched too much TV and too many movies but I've always been a security freak. It started as a teenager(needing to protect myself as a female) and I can't help it. I always leave at least a car-length in front of me at night; always lock my doors... that type of thing.

I don't fault anyone for sharing pics. I've enjoyed seeing the beautiful faces of the BBB children. I just don't feel comfortable doing it myself. That little security part of my brain always says "what if". It took alot for me to post the one pic I did. It was a simple newborn-wrapped-up-in-a-blanket shot. No harm and no way of identifying anyone but I've learned my lesson as have we all.


Elizabeth

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif[/img][/url]

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/t/dogdogcrd20040405_4_My+child+is.png

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev035pb___.png
Our second morsel due early February 2006!

[cvharris]

I probably haven't posted many pics besides a few diapering ones - but the diapering ones are the only ones I removed.

Carolee
Mama to Ben (6/03)
Baby #2 due 12/22/05

[JLiebCamm]

I'm not deleting any. I never posted a pic that I wasn't already comfortable having as part of the public domain. Although I am disgusted by the thought that someone would use any pics in a perverted way, I accepted long ago that anything that I put out there is vulnerable. I would prefer to be part of a password/login protected group and hope that the Fields can move to this in the future.

[TahliasMom]

I don't think I posted anything that I didn't want to share either. The only other board I post on is the wedding channel. What's MDC?

And yes it would be nice to see this moved to a login/password forum too!

[RwnMayfair]

I didn't vote, because I'm not deleting anything either. Now granted, what I do is just put things in one of my web spaces on AOL and share links here, so if I remove them from there, they're gone from here. But I'm not bothering with removing anything from there at the moment. I just don't have much up there anyway. Most of our pictures are on the webspace where we keep our personal websites, and aren't even linked to those sites. Not that that would stop a determined person, but there's no bath pictures or anything like that up there either. Nothing that we wouldn't be comfortable with sharing with others. I've also never shared any diaper pictures here either. Not 'cause he's not cute in his diapers, or because he doesn't have any cute diapers, but more just because I just don't think to take pictures of him in the diapers to show them off.

I dunno, I could babble on more, but I can't get it written out the way I want it to sound.

-Melissa

Taran, November 20, 2003

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_emerald_18m.gif - Eighteen months!
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http://lilypie.com/days/050821/4/0/0/-5/.png

[murpheyblue]

>You know I get the feeling there's a fair amount of finger
>wagging at those of us who posted pictures. And it's
>sprinkled with equal doses of 'I told you so' and 'You should
>have know better'.

I hope you didn't get that idea from my post because that was not my intent at all. I've posted pics of DD on the BBB and likely would have posted more. As a WOHM, I don't get to capture as many things on film as I'd like like a funny moment or the finds on DD's latest shopping spree for RL. Given the opportunity, you'd all probably would get sick of seeing her.

[dr mom]

>You know I get the feeling there's a fair amount of finger
>wagging at those of us who posted pictures. And it's
>sprinkled with equal doses of 'I told you so' and 'You should
>have know better'.

I'm sorry you feel that way, I hope it wasn't anything I wrote because I certainly didn't mean to criticize anyone - everyone just has a different comfort level with what they're willing to share online. Certainly we're ALL feeling badly right now about how this is going to affect the BBB, and I don't think finger pointing or criticizing one another would be helpful.

On the other hand, it's too bad we can't channel all that energy and frustration. I think what we'd all really like to do is get our hands on the sicko who thought he'd make some easy money by exploiting innocent children...pity we can't take out our frustrations on HIM. Hell hath no fury like an angry mama bear defending her cubs!

[amazz]

>>Hell hath no fury like an angry mama bear defending her cubs!

Amen, sister friend!!

Angela
mama to my raisin and furry mama to Chloe
~ A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. ~Carl Sandburg