Do you share the name (or names you have narrowed it down to) of your children before they are born?

[Melanie]

[linsei]

We selected a few names, but couldn't decide on one until we were face to face with our ds. Probably wouldn't have picked the name that we did if we would have had a name before birth.

Linda



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[kaylinsmommy2]

We shared our name with everyone who asked. No one said anything bad about our chosen name, only a couple people asked questions about it. I didn't know that people didn't share their chosen name before their children was born until I was 6 months pregnant (and told the entire world Kaylin's name). I liked that we told people - it helped me get used to using her name. It also made the pregnancy more concrete - that there was a person with a name (that I used often) inside my tummy, since I found pregnancy very abstract. If that makes any sense... :)
Caroline
Kaylin 6/5/04

[Toba]

We told everyone, including a bunch of strangers on a mommy board I frequent. Even the nurses and doctors in the OR knew his name before they met him. I got a few looks about it, and some ignorant rudeness from my mother, but other than that, not much. Oh, our pastor used to make jokes about the flood when mentioning our baby during sermons, prayers or announcements before the birth, but he really liked the name -- that's just the kind of guy he is.

I was a little worried about sharing the name Nevan because it's so unusual and I didn't want copycats. It took me a long time to find that name!


~Kimberly Anne~
Noah Nevan, March 12, 2004
*the light of my life*

[jamsmu]

We don't talk about it--especially with family. Okay, my two close friends know our ideas, and I shared on Preggo Pals because I don't know them IRL. But we made the mistake of sharing when I was 1 month pg with Carson and I really wish I hadn't. Everything became competitve ("I love that name," "ugh...," "you can't use that, its my baby name"--from my sister who remains unmarried, and without a bf.) Anyway, that night, DH and I made a pact not to talk about it publicly anymore. We've been a tiny bit more lax, but still hold pretty strictly to this order.

[gour0]

I mostly tell people we haven't decided yet. We told everyone with Ben because we were certain. If people press, I do tell them what we think it most likely will be.

[hez]

We mostly kept it to ourselves. We tossed around a few names we were unsure of at some friends. We didn't mind telling people what our middle name options were (all family names). When we got it down to the final 2 first names, we didn't really tell anyone-- just one or two close friends. We went into the delivery with two names, and picked the one he looked like the most. It was an idea planted by our neighbors, who were sure their first born would be Christopher, but when he was born decided he looked more like a Jonathan (which had been on the list at one point). It just seemed appropriate to pick a name for DS once he actually showed us his face & a little bit of his personality ;)

[barbarhow]

We told no one-with either. This was at my mothers suggestion who, coincidentally, was one of the few who made a comment at DS's name.
Barbara-mom to Jack 3/27/03, a Red Sox fan
and Anna 5/12/05, my little Yankee fan!

[jbowman]

Yes, we tell everyone who will listen, LOL! All of our family/friends know that if we have a boy, we'll name him after DH, so there's no mystery there (although the nickname is another story...). If we have a girl, we already have a name (and had one picked out for #2 about 6 weeks after Ellie was born, LOL). With Ellie, some of the choices were obvious--I had always wanted to use my mother's maiden name, so that became her middle name. Nobody has ever said, "wow, why would you choose that?" Everyone knows that it's a done deal! Besides the names that we've chosen are gorgeous ;).

[dr mom]

It was a closely guarded secret, but that's mostly because we really hadn't made up our minds yet! I did share with my mother and sister the "working list" of 60+ names for both genders, but when DH and I narrowed it down to 5 boy and 5 girl names, we didn't tell anyone what they were. Even then, we weren't absolutely certain about DS's name until the day after he was born, and then could pick one that "fit".

[aguinn]

we shared middle names with both boys, as they are family names and we figured no one would make obnoxious or negative comments about them without coming off as a true dolt. we share first names at birth, since the baby is already here and everyone is focused on "how cute! how small! what a peanut!" and not really wanting to dampen our joy with comments on the name (if they have any that are negative).

;)amy
proud momma to DS
and cutie #2 due 9/9/05 - it's a BOY! (Please come earlier! School starts on the 12th!)

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"Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see." ~ Neil Postman

[caridura]

It took us a long time to pick a name for DD. People were constantly asking us her name, so we then decided that it would be a secret until she was born! If they didn't like our choice TOO BAD.

[nov02mom]

I voted yes with everyone....but really- we only shared our current thoughts because we were still arguing over names as I was pushing!!!! The only person who said anything nasty about our name choice was my MIL who informed me that she "hates the name Jacob and she's not calling him that" (and still won't! but that would be a post for bitching post!!)

[amp]

I had to vote other, because we don't really have a plan. With Jacob, we didn't know if he was a boy or a girl, and we did share our name choices with some people and not others (ones we expected to have complaints, opinions, etc).

This time around, we know she's a girl and we have narrowed down our name choices to 3 name combinations. We aren't even sure which one we are picking, so while we'll share some of our ideas, we haven't picked "the one" yet. I am sure that once we are sure, if we are sure, we'll share. But we could just as likely walk into the hospital without being sure.

[lilycat88]

We didn't tell anyone. We decided early on that we would keep it secret until we saw her and decided if the name "fit". We knew early on we were having a girl and, of course, we could come up with a boy name immediately. We didn't come up with Susanna's name as a possibility until June 7th. I still have the email that I sent my husband saying "what about...". It just popped into my head one day at work and I didn't want to forget. So, we were pretty sure it would be Susanna Frances but since she was whisked away to the NICU for about 5 hours and I wasn't able to see her until the spinal from my C-section wore off, we didn't decide for sure until later in the day.


Jamelin
Mom to Susanna born 6/29/2004

[Rachels]

Hmm. I can't answer. With Abigail, we were certain of her name, so we told everyone. They were all going to hear eventually anyway, and we weren't asking for feedback. This time, we're waffling between two names, and we haven't figured out what we want to do. I've told very close friends and a VERY few family members what we're thinking of, but I haven't been ready or interested in hearing the opinions of the masses.

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02
New baby coming in October!
(Holy smokes, it's a boy!!!)


"When you know better, you do better."
Maya Angelou
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_amethyst_36m.gif
Nursed for three years!

[squimp]

We didn't want to tell folks we had settled on a name, even though we had ;). DH felt very strongly about this, especially. This may sound odd, but we wanted to make sure her name felt right when she was born. We could not be 100% certain about a name for someone we'd never seen!

We did share a list of potential names with friends and family, just to get thoughts. In particular with family, since DD's first and middle names are family names.

[JulieL]

Nope - don't share the names. First I like the idea of having some kind of surprise for everyone as everyone knows it's a girl already. Second I don't want to hear peoples oppinions on the name, or what other names would be good and so forth. Also we like family names but don't want oppinions on which family name to pick - if we would pick one. And lastly - I've heard of some people taking your name and using it on their baby - although I have no friends who would do this, just the idea erks me! We did this with our son, and I am happy we kept it to ourselves! So that's my thoughts on the matter.

[zen_bliss]

only if you're on the fence and want some feedback. otherwise, no way! i wasn't looking for approval, and i spared myself lots of conversations i wouldn't have wanted to have. i learned this after watching the fuss and stress generated when a family member shared her not-that-unusual name ahead of the baby's arrival. MIL was a PITA, so i just kept telling her we had a short list and were waiting to meet the baby to see if the name fit, even though we'd decided when i was 8 weeks pg!

[c2lane]

Julie - DITTO! When I was pregnant with Dillan, we told everyone her name and got all kinds of comments, the good, the bad and the ugly. 2 weeks before she was due the check out clerk at the grocery store asked what we were having and we told her a girl. Then she asked the name and my DH said "Dillan". The woman looked at us like we were crazy and blurted out "FOR A GIRL!?!" I couldn't believe it. Needless to say I was desperately trying to figure out a different name but when she was born, I knew she was Dillan Rose.

This time around, we have only told 2 of our close friends but now I'm starting to have second thoughts. I feel so much more relaxed about the name this time around because we just tell people we're still trying to figure it out, which is kind of true.

~Carrie
mom to Dillan Rose 01/02/04
& our 2nd blessing due 10/6/05

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[loewymartin]

I put other :) With DD#1 we didn't tell anyone. We had friends who had heard the "hate it" "you can't use that" stuff and didn't want to go there. This time we don't have a name picked yet (and only 5 weeks to go!) but I've mentioned to some online close friends what we've been tossing around. We won't tell family or friends IRL what we are thinking of, or what we pick though. Since our u/s said it's a girl we're keeping the name as our "surprise" on delivery day.

Michelle
Mom to Alia born 5/16/02 and the GIRL! peanut due 8/13/05

[bunnisa]

>lastly - I've heard of some people taking your name and using
>it on their baby - although I have no friends who would do
>this, just the idea irks me! We did this with our son, and I
>am happy we kept it to ourselves! So that's my thoughts on the
>matter.

Ugh! We had friends who did this. We had a boy name and a girl name picked out(didn't find out the gender until the birth), and DH told our friends (good friends who were pregnant at the time) what the names were. Well, the girl name happens to be Swedish, and our friends are Swedish, and they said, "Ooh we like that! If we have a girl we're going to name her that!" I was appalled! I literally prayed that they would not have a girl and take our beloved name ;).

Well, we had a boy, and they had a boy, and last I heard my friend is not pregnant again yet, so, as of today the name's still ours. But what WERE they thinking?


Bethany
mom to one and one on the way!
http://lilypie.com/days/060226/0/8/1/-6/.png

[sidmand]

But you can have the opposite problem. We didn't tell our name and then one of DH's cousins named her baby the name we had narrowed it down to! It took us a long long time to agree on that name. But it turns out the name we were going to use is more popular than we realized, so alls well that ends well. But either way can be problematic!

Debbie

Mom to Sawyer!
http://lilypie.com/baby1/060607/0/3/1/-5/.png (http://lilypie.com)

[HannaAddict]

We didn't tell anyone, especially family. Even though we wouldn't have been asking for feedback, people are just so rude and seem to be comfortable commenting on people's selections. And, even though we didn't ask for suggestions, my in-laws still felt the need to suggest several names, like "Larry" for some distant relative (hope no one has a "Larry" but not our style of name). We had a very short list, down to two names really, with my son's name the front runner. When he was born we took one look at him and knew our first choice name "fit."

Good luck.
Kimberly
DS 3/18/04

[Melanie]

I'm chuckling at those of you who said "Especially not family!" haha.

We told no one. Though we did go buy letter for his room that spelled his name on the way to my mom's one day. I think it drove her a tiny bit crazy knowing it was in my car. She had fun suggesting horrendous names to us "guessing" that is what we had chosen.

This time, I guess they're all over it and know we won't say a word as no one has asked.

We've pretty much narrowed it down to one name, with a close second choice. Dh has firmly settled on the first name...I am a woman, I can't commit just yet, though I like it a lot. LOL.

Though I'm tempted to sneak out and get those letters again...it was fun to come home from the hospital and see Dh had put his name up already.