HELP- my sweet little girl won't let me put her down! need ADVICE

[JulieL]

OK I've been through this once before but having a toddler to take care of as well is making things more complicated. Miriam loves to be held - big surprise, a newborn wants to be held. BUT it seems like every day at some point I can't put her down w/out her crying. Last night she was like that from 5 till, well all night. Today it started right away. I feed her, get her to sleep, put her down and WAAAAA - w/in 5 min she has worked to a complete frenzy. It doesn't help that she has GERD and is on Zantac for it (which has helped). I wouldn't call her collicy but needy. I do sling her but can't do that 24/7. She only likes her swing sometimes, bummer! I actually broke down and bought her a pacifier to help her self soothe. I was bummed to do this as I didn't want to use them, but she can't find her thumb by herself. I swaddle too. I can't think of what else to do for a newborn, she's to young to CIO. Any words of advice?

[lmariana]

Hugs Julie! Boy, that girl sure does love you a lot, huh? :)

Atom was very much the same way, until I let him start tummy sleeping. Is Miriam on her back? I know that tummy sleeping is supposed to be a no-no, but it's the only way we can get any sleep around here. I also added a single layer fleece blanket on top of his crib sheet, which for some reason really helps. I think it's less cold than a regular sheet and doesn't wake him up. We've also used a white noise machine with the "womb" sound. Maybe you could try wrapping her in one of your shirts to see if your scent helps?

Will she co-sleep with you?

This is totally weird, but it works for us...I dab his face with breastmilk. Something about the scent just relaxes him!

Have you considered trying an Amby? That may even help with the GERD a bit. (There's one for sale on Swap.)

You're doing a super job! I hope your arms can find some rest soon!

Mariana
Mom to Gabe (8/03) and Atom (10/05)
www.heinzandmariana.com
http://www.geocities.com/kellysb/images/medals/purpleheart.jpg http://www.geocities.com/kellysb/images/medals/awardbar2-6wks.jpg

[tarabenet]

Does she do any better being settled in a more upright position? Aubrey (my niece, who had bad GERD) would sometimes let us put her in her carrier, stroller, swing or bouncy, even when she wouldn't let us put her flat -- and propping the crib/cradle up on one end helped a tiny bit. Also, propping her on her tummy (well, knees and elbows kinda) in a semi-upright position worked, but the way we did it still required careful supervision. But mostly, the whole family took shifts to hold her, which is no help for you, for which I'm very sorry. I feel for you, and am sending you lots of cyber-hugs. I hope someone else has something more useful to offer you.

[JulieL]

Well... Anthony had GERD (though we didn't realize it at the time, another bummer), and him sleeping on his tummy was the only way for him to sleep. I haven't tried with Miriam, I'm a little leary to resort to it, SIDS and all. She's napping less again, and I think this may be part of her neediness. I think I will try the white noise deal, I saw a CD somewhere that was only white noise. Funny last night I had to use the steam cleaner while she was screaming, cause Anthony just threw up every peice of food in his stomach. She stopped crying, just to start back up after I stopped... ah the drama. I think I will try using one of my shirts for her in her crib. We do co-sleep sorta. I'm not wanting to, and half the night (well most nights) she sleeps in her co-sleeper, the other half in my arms. It doesn't help that that early morning feeding I fall straight to sleep and end up co-sleeping ...oops. We don't want to do this exclusively as breaking Anthony from it was a two months scream binge ordeal. Sigh...anyway what is an Amby, I'll have to google that. Oh and I do also keep an extra receiving blanket on her too to keep that warmth.

[JulieL]

Sometimes it's better upright, but not always - like when she is upright in her swing. DH helps holding her, but he isn't around much to help out.

[Hippoharbor]

My DS is also a tummy sleepy for the same reason...he would cry as soon as I tried to put him in his crib on his back, but would stay asleep if I put him on his tummy.

Good luck. Hopefully you have a good sling/carrier to help out while having to hold your babe.

Michelle

[phirey]

It must be the age and the GERD! I keep feeling the same way -- I feel like I did a better job with the first baby than this one!

At about three weeks Eva was diagnosed with GERD, and we started Zantac. We quickly upgraded to Prevacid. She seemed to be in less pain, but is still a very grumpy baby, and therefore needs to be held about 16-20 hours a day! She still eats every 2 hours. Despite me having recently bought 4 slings, she hates them :-( Baby Bjorn buys us about 20 minutes. The swing and bouncy seat are each worth about 3-5 minutes ( a VERY quick shower). Mostly she sleeps upright on my shoulder in burping position.

Friday, Margot was playing and fell and hit her head HARD (another story -- a gorgeous shiner just in time for Xmas pics). She was *too* quiet for the split second afterward so to check on her, I quickly "dumped" the baby out of my arms into the nearest spot -- Margot's beanbag chair. She stayed asleep and continued to sleep there for the next three hours! It requires careful supervision, but it keeps her upright and I think it must feel like she's being cradled. I've been covering the chair with an open weave crochet blanket for air circulation. The SIDS risk does kind of freak me out, but today's nap took place with the chair up on the kitchen table with me right there feeding Margot lunch and prepping dinner and paying bills.

I do think a lot of what we're going through is just the age -- 6 weeks is well known to be the worst for fussiness. Margot was awful at 6 weeks, too (I remember because it was the week between Xmas and New Years). Has Miriam started cooing and smiling yet? Every time Eva does I try to remember that more of that is coming...

Hang in there!

[JulieL]

I am going to call her ped tomorrow. Things seem to be getting worse the last couple days, though it was better. She is pulling away from her feedings crying more and more. This evening was the worst I burped her like four times and she pulled away probably twice that many times crying. Maybe a higher dosage of Zantac or the Prevacid would work.

She smiles but mostly in her sleep and doesn't really coo yet. She was born 4 weeks early so those things may be a bit delayed.

[mommy_someday]

Jules, FWIW when Luke was really little, sometimes the only way I could get him to stop screaming was to turn the vacuum cleaner on. Some nights he was so worked up that I couldn't get him latched and nursing. But once I turned on the noise, he stopped screaming and realized there was a boob in his face. I don't miss those moments and imagine it must be ten times harder when Anthony wants/needs your attention, too. (((Hugs)))

[phirey]

Are you nursing? Pulling away during feedings might also be fast let-down. Both my DDs do that, especially during the witching hour.

How much Zantac is she on. Eva was on 0.7 ccs of the grape Flavor RX morning and night, plus Extra Strength Mylanta (OTC -- supposedly babies like the Orange Creme flavor the best) up to three times a day. The Prevacis is once a day, plus Mylanta. To be honest, I'm not sure we're seeing a difference.

BTW I jinxed myself this afternoon on the beanbag chair thing. I tried id two or three times while trying to clean up a little. She screamed every time. So back on the shoulder she went while i unloaded the dishwasher with one hand...

Hope the ped can give you some good advice. If you get any hints, PLEASE let me know.

[buddyleebaby]

My dd was the same way. actually at almost 6 months, she STILL prefers to be held most of the time.
But I DO remember those days of not being a ble to put her down at all w/o her crying.
Have you tried baby-wearing? We actually didn't use ours much ( I preferred to just hold her in my arms) but for those times when I had to get things done I would put her in a carrier and she would sleep very happily. It might be worth a shot, esp. w/a toddler to run after.
Good luck!

[JulieL]

She is on .5 right now. I know I have a decently fast let down, but she does it through the whole feeding off and on, not just at first. And I swear I thought I read that a baby pulling off the breast can be a sign of GERD, or maybe my sleep deprived mind made it up ;) Usually this only happens for a couple of feedings a day, not everyone, but last night was particularlly bad. :( So sorry the bean bag didn't work. Last night I tried putting my pillow case over her co-sleeper mat (fits perfectly), and warmed the bed up with a rice bag. It worked for a while, that was nice. I think I'll try that today to get her to nap for a little longer. I will let you know if my ped gives me more tips. I felt so bad for her last night. I hope things get better for both of our little ones!

[JulieL]

I think I'll have to get that CD - now off to google it. Remember how Anthony use to cry every time you happened to visit? I have a CLASSIC pic of him screaming in your arms - it is TO funny, especially your expression. I bet when you would leave you would think, that had BETTER not be how my baby is! Glad you found something that calmed Luke down. Anthony is quite understanding, but I still have to do things like bathe him and wipe his bottom after he poos (I'm SO not ready to have him do that, I did tell you about my hallway carpet didn't I?) and such, and I CAN NOT do that with her, even in a sling. Ah this too shall pass and I will have one really promiment gray hair ;)

[JulieL]

Here's a website I just found, maybe there will be a nugget of gold there. Well one can hope. Anyway the neck arching while feeding is what she does, but let's go of the nipple at the same time. Hope this can help us, or at least give us more info:

http://www.infantrefluxdisease.com/symptoms.htm

[juliasmom05]

The hair dryer saved us. It was amazing, DD would be crying hysterically and as soon as we turned on the hairdryer, she immediately fell asleep. We ended up buying a CD with just the sound of a hairdryer. It was the best 20 bucks we ever spent. We still turn it on for naps. We bought ours from http://www.purewhitenoise.com/. They have a huge selection of white noise CDs.


Marci

Mom to Julia 4/05

[JulieL]

Thanks!!! :)

[lmintzer]

OMG, Marci! They make a hairdryer CD? We literally burned out 2 hairdryers calming our colicky ds#1, and then ds#2 who calmed to the sound too! Wow. We had to buy dryers that had a cool setting so not to start a fire. Didn't know any other kiddos liked the dryer like ours did!

[lmintzer]

OMG, Marci! They make a hairdryer CD? We literally burned out 2 hairdryers calming our colicky ds#1, and then ds#2 who calmed to the sound too! Wow. We had to buy dryers that had a cool setting so not to start a fire. Didn't know any other kiddos liked the dryer like ours did!

[lmintzer]

OMG, Marci! They make a hairdryer CD? We literally burned out 2 hairdryers calming our colicky ds#1, and then ds#2 who calmed to the sound too! Wow. We had to buy dryers that had a cool setting so not to start a fire. Didn't know any other kiddos liked the dryer like ours did!

[juliasmom05]

Incredible, isn't. Wish I had thought to market something like that. They sell all sorts of CDs (vacuum cleaner, fan...). Amazingly only the hairdryer works for us. I have visions of Julia when she gets older falling asleep at the hair salon.

Marci

Mom to Julia 4/05