My Toby is suffering from honesty...

[kijip]

and I am sure your children are too! Here is a sampling of recent quotes:

On walking into Js new studio apartment:

"Um, dadda there is not much room in here"

then he opened the closet doors and demanded "wheres the hallway?" "Wheres the bedroom?" "Why Toby bed in livin rooom?" "Wheres the table for eating" LOL. J promptly got a small dining set the next day!

On returning to the car from an errand:

"Where is our car?" Me: "There is our car (pointing to my beige 98 Corolla) Toby: "We should get a pretty car like that one! Mamas car boring" (pointing to a red Subaru Forrester)

On finding my manicure set in the living room, while my mother was over:

"This is mamas set to make nails pretty. Gramma should use it toooo, here Gramma". Then he handed it to my mother.

So cough up your blunt kid's remarks.

[buddyleebaby]

That's too funny!

[psophia17]

Those are great, Katie - Toby is priceless :)

DS hasn't hit the critiquing stage yet...I'll be sure to listen carefully when he does.

[mudder17]

Hee, hee, that is so cute! From the mouth of babes... ;)

The only thing Kaya has done so far is if she's in the middle of a hug fest and you say, "Daddy hug?" and she hugs daddy with requisite "ummm..." then you say, "grandma hug?" and so on and so forth, sometimes if you ask her for "mama hug?" and she's either already done it or she get's a gleam in her eye, she'll say, "No!" in a really cute voice and walk in the opposite direction. :)

However, our friend has a 3-4 year old and she has preschool. The mother will sometimes be a classroom mother and has gotten to know some of the other kids. Earlier this week, she was back for the first time after the holidays and she started talking to one of her daughter's close friends. She said, "Hey Jenny (names have been changed), it's so nice to see you. We had a nice holiday, but I really missed seeing you." Jenny replied, "Well, I didn't miss you. In fact, I didn't think about you at all." She was very nice about it, but it was pretty hilarious.


Eileen

http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/candle.gif for Leah
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_emerald_18m.gif

http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/t/catcatcvi20040222_4_Kaya+is.png
Kaya's a cousin! 10/1/05, 5lb13oz

[Roleysmom]

In the fall, Roley told her Grandfather that his teeth are yellow and he should brush them.

Paula -- mom to Roley Julia, January '02

[s7714]

Those are funny!

Our current favorite happened at Christmas time when my MIL was over. She was asking my DD where people lived. DD got everyone right until MIL asked her where her Daddy's home was. DD promptly replied that "Daddy's home is at work!" :P Yeah, you could say he works a lot!

Jennifer
Mommy to
DD 3/03
DD 6/05

Calling fellow BBB SoCal moms...we'd love to meet you!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/babybargainssocal/

[missym]

From Gwen to Mark after his shower, "Daddy, you're tummy's getting BIIIGGG!"

Missy, mom to Gwen 03/03 and Rebecca 09/05

[lizamann]

Nora apparently likes telling my sister embarassing little details, like this one, "Sometimes mommy pops her pimples!" or "Mommy's potty smells BAD." And now you all, too know my dirty little secrets.

[tarabenet]

Nope. Guess Aubrey's developmentally delayed (and therefore more socially acceptable? tee hee!). The only thing she shares with the world that we wish she wouldn't is "Poop-poop! Poop-poop! POOP-POOP!" But at least it is accurate reporting. [sigh]

[kijip]

Not delayed, just polite. Or shy maybe :)

[psophia17]

I'll see your "poop poop" and raise you an "I farted, STINKY!" in his outside voice when we were watching the airplanes take off from the McDs that has a view of the runway a couple of weeks ago.

Thanks, DS, for that heads up...

[tarabenet]

She's probably a genius who will potty train herself by her second birthday. Uh-huh. Yeah. I hear there' a lot of *that* going around. ;)

Shy and polite to announce "poop-poop" at the dinner table? We aren't from the same part of the country, are we Katie? LOL!

And Petra, how considerate of Nathan to share the early warning signal so you could vacate the area! ROFLMAO!

[kijip]

>Shy and polite to announce "poop-poop" at the dinner table?
>We aren't from the same part of the country, are we Katie?
>LOL!

Now, well ya said nothing about the dinner table! ;)

[asha]

Dont think this one belongs here, but I have to share. Sorry if this is TMI.

DS thinks my panties are also called pull ups. He saw me once changing from my work clothes into my pajamas and remarked that mama wears pull ups. I dont think I bothered to specify the difference.

That evening, DH came home. He ran to DH and said "Daddy, mama has pull ups". Just this would have been great. He tried to pull down DH's pants and check if he has pull ups too. Luckily we were all indoors :-)

[caridura]

Oh my goodness....thanks for the laughs!!

No talking here yet, but I'm sure I'll have some of my own in the future.

[kozachka]

DS who is still attempting to nurse once every few days, pointing to my left breast and saying "Danya titya" and than to my right one, which he has not nursed from for about a year, and saying "Papa titya". Thanks for sharing it with the world, sweetie :). Now mom can start explaining why you know what is what. Hopefully MIL is nowhere is sight, she thinks we are done doing "that stuff".

Also in response to MIL question about whether he misses DH, DS honestly said "no, papa in the office". Guess who needs to spend more time home.

[smallestangel]

LOL! :)

My mom and aunt were over the other morning when the potty I ordered for Jacob was delivered. He was really excited and wanted to try it out right away. So, I stripped him and sat him down. He jumped up, ran over to the basket next to the couch and grabbed some newspaper. He then sat back down, looked at my mom and aunt and said, "Read. Poopy. Dadda. Stinky" Then he put the newspaper up to his face and "read" while using the potty.

So yeah, now my mom and aunt know what my husband does while in the bathroom. :P Oh well, atleast he actually did say dadda and not Bobby.


Amanda

[VClute]

"Kathy" - your kid is HILARIOUS!

Amy in NC
mom to Dixon, born 2/14/05

[hez]

I've been saving them up for just such a thread :)

Last Friday, after DH threw one of Payton's plastic golf clubs, Payton told him, "Daddy, that's not very nice. You need a time out!"

Saturday, he picked up a can (we keep pop and such next to the small fridge in the basement to rotate in as we drink them). All pop is 'Coke' to him normally. He took this particular can over to DH and told him "It's beer!" and it was!

Later that day, as I was getting him some dinner, I asked him which vegetable he wanted. When I repeated, "What would you like, Payton?" he responded, "Peace and quiet, Mommy, peace and quiet!"

I found the culprit for that last one-- "Mr. Gronkle's Busy Day"-- it's been a bedtime favorite 'cause they play soccer at the end :)

ETA-- I meant to tell you all that I got some giggles over here reading yours!

[holliam]

LOL.. these are so funny!

So far all Mari does if anyone burps or farts (yea, sorry, that's what we call it!), she says REALLY loudly "OOOOOOOOOH!" She just stares you down until you say "excuse me". LOL She will say "scuse" when she does it.

Holli

[tny915]

DD and I were watching DH get a haircut. The guy put the drape around DH's neck and started snipping. DD quietly stares at DH a bit, then announces, "Daddy's wearing a dress!"

[MarisaSF]

Jazz, with a typical 17 mo (limited) pronunciation and understanding, says a couple embarassing things:

First, she's into naming body parts. She likes to pat backs especially. When she tries to pat her own back, she reaches down towards her sacrum and says a word that unintentionally sounds a lot like "butt." This was great when MIL's very proper friend was visiting the other day.

Second, she has a book called "The Christmas Story." Joseph has a white beard and a red robe. Jazz cannot get out of her head that this man's name is NOT "Santa." :P So we don't read that book in public either.

When my DH was a tot, his grandmother was holding a saggy balloon and asked, "What has more wrinkles: Grandma or this balloon?" DH answered honestly, "Grandma!" She asked for it, if you ask me.

[C99]

Nate told me this morning, "Mama go to work, Daddy stay here," when J. told him that he had to take a shower and go to work this morning. Way to make your mom feel loved, kid.

[peasprout]

Since everyone's talking about poopy,...

Whenever DD has a hard time pooping (no pun intended), I tell her that she needs to eat more vegetables. The other day DH took her to the bathroom. She came back proudly exclaiming, "Mommy, the vegetables worked!"

And DH refuses to take her into the men's restrooms anymore because she always says embarrasing things like yelling, "that man go poopy too?" or "Yucky! Somebody poopy! It's stinky in here!"
JP

[muskiesusan]

Very funny stories! Here's one of mine.

After having my hair cut and colored a couple months ago, I came home only to have Nick laugh at me and tell me I looked kind of silly. Just what I wanted to hear upon having my hair colored for the first time!

Oh, not really honesty, but kind of related. A good friend of mine is expecting a baby next month, and while Nick was coloring the other day, Nick asked me if there was a hole for the baby to come out from her belly. So, I explained, with not much detail, that mommies have a special hole called vaginas that the babies come out through. He then questioned as he thought the baby would be too big and I assured him it would work out. Then he says, "Is that where the penis goes?" I about spit the water I was drinking in his face shocked he knew such a thing. But, being the quick thinking mom I said, "Silly, girls don't have penises, remember?" He nodded and went on coloring.

Susan
Mom to Nick 10/01
& Alex 04/04

[lizajane]

schuyler hasn't figured out lying yet. so when dylan started to cry when he was a smaller baby, we asked schuyler if he bit his foot. and schuyler yelled, "NO! i bit his toe!"

on the other side of the spectrum- sometimes schuyler will look at me and say something like, "pretty hair, mommy. i like it."

[jamsmu]

OMG Susan!!! You certainly handled that well!!

[LogansMommy]

lol- When I was pg with Gavin and just starting to get a belly, Logan climbed in bed one morning with me and asked if he could "talk to the baby" I said sure and proceed to pull the covers off my stomach. He came real close to my head and said, "well open your mouth!" Not sure what was going on, I opened my mouth, and he then proceeded to start yelling down my throat "hello baby, I'm your big broter Logan"...it was so funny I almost peed!

But the story gets better...he continued to 'talk' to the baby this way throughout my pregnancy, even in public places. Then near the end when I was really huge he did the usual hollering down my throat and then he asked me "Mom, when's this baby coming out of your mouth?" While I was trying to think up some response, he followed up with, "Daddy is going to take you to the Drs again and the Dr will POP the baby out of your mouth, and then you can bring him home."
I just wish I had it all on film :)


Arianne
Mommy to Logan 3/01 and Gavin 10/05

[kijip]

>schuyler hasn't figured out lying yet. so when dylan started
>to cry when he was a smaller baby, we asked schuyler if he bit
>his foot. and schuyler yelled, "NO! i bit his toe!"

All of these stories are way too funny. Thanks everyone for sharing them. I know that I had a good laugh!

I love the un-lie, Lizajane.

[brittone2]

These are all soooo funny! Great thread :)

[elephantmeg]

My aunt was a Lacome consultant and very preocupied with makeup. When her son was about 3 she told him "tell Nana she's beautiful". He looked at Nana and said "She needs lipstick". I don't think he'll ever live that one down.

Margaret
#1 edd 2-13-2006
it's a boy!