HELP! MY DD ISN'T SLEEPING AT ALL!

[pamommy]

Hi fellow moms:

I had the same problem with my first ds. My dd is currently 4 1/2 weeks old. I know that they don't usually sleep but I wanted to see if this was pretty normal. She was sleeping really great (ie 2-3 hours) in the first 2 weeks. Except now she won't sleep on her own. Whenever we put her down to sleep (she's already asleep) she'll wake up either within 5 minutes or else within 30 minutes. So that's as far as we've gotten. I've tried everything from Amby, to a cradle that rocks. I don't think she has reflux but she is really gassy and I've tried mylicon gas drops and even gripe water to no avail. So now we are down to two options. We either carry her or else I have to breastfeed her to sleep and literally hold her while lying down. It's just that sometimes I would really like a break and be able to sleep apart from her. We've even tried the co sleeper but it's the same thing. We just can't seem to be able to put her down to sleep. Are we doing somethign wrong? I just don't have the time either since I also stay home with my son who is 2 1/2 years old. So i've resorted to carrying her in a baby carrier which helps some but I was wondering if what she is doing is pretty normal with an infant. My son was the same thing. We had to literally hold him 24/7 for at least 4 months. It was fine with one but with 2 I really can't do it. Can you help me?

Any advice would be really appreciated. I just wanted to see if I can be doing anything else to help her. All I want is a few hours where she'll sleep on her own. Is that too much to ask? Am I expecting too much from her? Please HELP!

Thank you in advance,

Emily

[psophia17]

I think this is perfectly normal for an infant, as much as it makes taking care of a 2yo difficult.

Have you tried a sling? That way your hands could be somewhat free and you could do other things, too. For bedtime, we had the little bumper things so DS couldn't roll over, and I think it made him feel like he was being held. It didn't work during daylight too well, but if it was dark out he'd stay asleep until the next time he needed a feeding.

My DS didn't sleep on his own until he was 4ish months old, like your DS, and then it was only for overnight. Naps I had to really work on getting him to stay asleep after I put him down, and it didn't really work until past 6 months...

Good luck!

[kedss]

DS had a case of reflux, so he slept in his carseat until he outgrew it. He loved sleeping in it, and I was sad when hegot too big for it. It really helped.

He has never done well in his crib and we are still cosleeping even though he does have a toddler bed, its just easier on us at this point.

[Rachels]

Are you sure she doesn't have reflux? That sure sounds like a red flag. Have you tried swaddling her? Letting her sleep in a swing? Have you tried eliminating dairy from your diet? It's HARD to do at first, but when you see your child suddenly sleep, it feels soooooo worth it.

-Rachel
Mama to Abigail Rose
5/18/02
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_amethyst_36m.gif
Nursed for three years!

and Ethan James
10/19/05
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/bf.jpg


"When you know better, you do better."
Maya

[pamommy]

I'm pretty sure that it's not reflux. She doesn't sleep any better when I put her in the amby, carseat or swing. In fact she hates it all. I haven't taken dairy since having her. Swaddling her doesn't help because she struggles out of the swaddle. I even used the miracle swaddler. I've talked to the pediatrician but he doesn't think she has reflux. It's just that she doesn't stay asleep. That's the problem but when we hold her she's fine..

Emily

[Alice523]

My son was very gassy and eliminating most dairy helped. I haven't done a complete elimination, but I took out all of the obvious sources like milk, cheese, yogurt, ice cream, etc. He didn't seem to have trouble passing it but he had so much that it would wake him up.

Swaddling really helped - you mentioned that she struggles. Does she struggle for very long? My son struggles and cries but after we calm him down, he goes to sleep with some rocking.

I remember that when my son was around that age (he's 15 weeks now), getting him to sleep was so hard! I'm sorry I can't be of more help, but we just had to wait it out. I think it's normal for an infant.

[overcome]

I was in your shoes 2 months ago. It was horrible. I was having pity parties for myself on a daily basis.

At three months I finally put DD on her stomach and let her cry for only 10 minutes, picked her up and soothed her, back down again on tummy. It worked. My life changed once she started sleeping. I feel like a normal person. Now she is 5 months ande sleep isn't always easy, but getting better and she's in her crib and not on my chest.

I wish I could give you some great advice but know you are not the only one and it WILL NOT LAST FOREVER.

Good luck
Ashley

[tarahsolazy]

Sadly, it might be too much to ask at this early stage. I only have one kid, but he was literally in adult arms for four months. I held him as we slept, we held him all day. Exhausting. I think the baby carrier is a great compromise. Invest in a couple of really nice slings or carriers, put your head down, and plow on through. Sorry, Mama.

[shilo]

for what it's worth, sam was the same way, only we didn't get the first two weeks you're describing. he was 'in arms'/'in sling' or on someones chest for pretty much his first two months to get him to sleep. i used to laugh at all the books i had that said newborns would sleep 12-16 hours a day when you brought them home. sam would sleep _maybe_ 8 out of 24 and never for more than 1hr to 1hr/15min stretches - most of the time much less. he was so alert and mellow from the first day we brought him home - so that was the silver lining to not sleeping. very rarely cranky or fussy, just wouldn't sleep - he was (and still is) a very light sleeper and the king of the 20 minute power nap. i followed up with my pedi of course, but he determined this was just normal for sam. from 8 weeks or so it slowly got better - maybe 1 two or three hr stretch at night, and eventually a seccond two or three hour stretch by 4 months or so. at 10 months, he sleeps 8 hours thru most nights and usually takes one 1-1.5 hour nap and one 20 minute powernap in 24 hours. i am green with envy sometimes when my friends talk about their babies who sleep 12 hours at night and nap for 2+ hours twice a day. that's just not sam - and like i said there are other blessings that far outweigh a little sleep - i have never met a more happy-go-lucky, mellow, alert, inquisitive baby.

i can totally sympathize - i was completely neurotic from the sleep deprivation - and i can't imagine it with a 2 1/2yr. old wanting your love and attention too. hang in there - it will get better.

lori :)

Sam 5/19/05 How lucky I am that you chose me.