Speaking of baby names...

[buddyleebaby]

would you name your child a name you liked even if the rest of your family did not?

In recent weeks, although our boy's name has remained the same, I have become very fond of the name Evelyn for a little girl. (To the point that I walk around repeating "Abigail and Evelyn" over and over.) My dh does not like it. My mom does not like it and had a few choice things to say about it, most of which annoyed me greatly and so I will not go into details. My sister is not fond of ot either.
The rest of the men in my family have stayed out of it.

Of course, I still have months to go and may change my mind a million times, but still, what would you do? Go ahead with your favorite name, ignoring the peanut gallery, or pick a new one?

I know my dh should have some input but I really like Evelyn!

[MegND95]

We did. When I was pg with #2, we decided if we had a ds, he would be Andrew James (two family names). My family strongly objected, because they did not like the way "Abby and Andy" sounded together. To quote my Dad, "It sounds like a variety show." Sigh...We went with the name anyway, and started calling him AJ, which suits him perfectly.

When I was pg with #3, we kept mum about our name choices! You need to pick a name that you love and tell your family to zip it!

FWIW, I think Abigail and Evelyn sound great together.

[annasmom]

I would name my dc a name my family didn't like, but not one my dh didn't like. My dh and I have a REALLY hard time deciding on names, which is why our present top boy name is the name that we had decided on for Anna 3 years ago. There are SO few names we agree on!

That being said I have had names that I love that my dh has hated, and vice versa. If my dh were to force one of those names on me, I would be really upset. BUT, you still have quite some time to change his mind!! :)

[crl]

I would definitely go with a name that other family members did not like. But DH and I both have veto powers on names. There are a lot of names I really, really like, that DH refuses to even consider. And there are a few he likes that I have vetoed. (I don't consider the veto final until the kid is actually named though--continued attempts to persuade each other are allowed :-) )

[wilelm]

You could use Evelyn whether it's a girl or a boy--it's originally a male name, pronounced Eve-a-linn, like the author Evelyn Waugh. ;)

Sheila

ETA: I love the name, and I wouldn't care what other people thought. Nobody in my family was very excited that my sister named her son Arthur, but we all got used to it, and now, of course, we think it suits him. Eventually, everyone will think whatever name you picked fits the baby.

[sidmand]

I agree that I wouldn't care so much if my family didn't care for it (speaking from experience--Sawyer, not a huge hit!). But if my DH didn't like it, that's another story. My DH said he was never going to come around to my favorite boys names and I said I would never come around to his, so we reached a compromise and picked a name that was in the middle of both of our lists.

FWIW--my grandmother is Evelyn and so personally I associate the name with her, but heck, no one over 50 who was Jewish liked our name (we had it narrowed down to Zacharay, Joshua, and Sawyer). My family is all over 50 and Jewish! DH's was not. We had a huge split on either loving or hating the name. But once the baby has the name, it's theirs and people forget...

Debbie

Mom to Sawyer!
http://lilypie.com/baby1/060607/0/3/1/-5/.png[/img] ([img)

[hobokenmom]

She said, "Oh, I just know you're going to call me from the hospital and say, 'ha ha, the joke's on you....his name is Thomas Andrew'" Well, guess what? We weren't joking.

We love our Zeke, and I think my mom would even say that it fits him.

[Roleysmom]

I agree with everyone else. I wouldn't go with a name that my DH didn't like but I could give two hoots about what anyone else in the family thought. I think the single best piece of parenting advice I have is don't tell family or close friends what your child's name will be before he or she is born. Wait until they are holding the new baby in their arms. You could name that baby Armageddon and they will tell you that it's the best name they have every heard and they've always loved the nickname Army.

For what it's worth, I think Evelyn is a beautiful name. It has a soft spot in my heart because DH's fabulously hip, funny and kind Aunt is named Evelyn. Even the nicknames Ev and Evie I think are so pretty. And Abigail and Evelyn sound sweet together!

Paula
Mom to Roley Julia, January '02

[o_mom]

Well, DH not liking it would be a problem. I mean, think of a name you dislike and how you would feel if he insisted on it knowing you hated it.

As far as your mother - don't even consider her opinion :-). I made a rule that we don't tell anyone names until after the baby is born. Everyone feels free to comment before, but once the baby is born very few will tell you they hate the name.

I would put it on the back burner - keep it on the list, but encourage DH to come up with other ones. If he hears it enough over the next few months, then it may grow on him. I will say, that with both of ours, the names we chose were not even on the list until 3-4 weeks before they were born. We had some we loved at 6 months that just didn't seem to fit as we got closer to the end.

[elliput]

Yes, DH and I would choose a name the rest of the family may not like. We kept our short list(s) of names secret until the very end so nobody knew even those names until after DD was born. Of course, we didn't have a short list until the day before, as we thought I still had three weeks to go. :-) When my Mom asked what the other names were, I could hear her nose wrinkle on the phone. She didn't like any of them. Ironically, DH suggested DD's name without knowing that it is a family name on my Mom's side (her cousin is Moira), and Mom had suggested it also. Next time around we will do the same thing, suggestions taken but nothing definite until after the baby's birth.

Evelyn is a beautiful name, though I do think you and your DH need to be in agreement.

[kijip]

Extended family? I would use the name no matter how much they hated it.

Spouse? No, I would not use the name. I think both parents should be in agreement on the name so I crossed off names that J did not like and he did the same for me.

That said, J's mother, J's Grandmother as well as my mother all hated Tobias as a name. Now that Toby is here they all seem ok with it.

[buddyleebaby]

Wait until they are holding the new baby in their arms. You could name that baby Armageddon and they will tell you that it's the best name they have every heard and they've always loved the nickname Army.

LOL! thsi made me smile. ; )

[buddyleebaby]

(I don't consider the veto final until the kid is actually named though--continued attempts to persuade each other are allowed )

I guess that's sort of why I keep saying the name aloud, even though we don't even know the baby's gender. I'm hoping maybe it will seep into his subconscious,

[mudder17]

Well, one thing you could do is have a short list of names when you go into the hospital and then you could see which name suits your little girl the most. I really do think your DH should have a say, but if you love it that much, it should go on your shortlist. And as you say, you may change your mind or maybe you and DH will find it suits your little girl. Personally, I think both of you should at least like the name that you end up using, but like I said, one or both of you may change your mind. As for the rest of the family--well, it's not up to them. :)


Eileen

http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/candle.gif for Leah
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[tarahsolazy]

This was our policy as well. We had the names picked out (didn't know sex until birth), but refused to tell anyone. Didn't want to hear how bad a choice Forrest was for a name.

Well, we got our little Forrest, and its a perfect name for the little guy, and now everyone thinks it was a brilliant choice! My mom did say that she wouldn't have thought it was a great name, though, had I mentioned it earlier.

We'll do the same next time if we are blessed with another kid.

[almostamom]

No one in our family liked our son's name. Pretty much everyone over 50 said, "What??? We'll call him by his middle name." Ummm, NO! DH and I both loved it and went with it. We wouldn't have named him a name we couldn't both agree on though.

~Linda~
http://lilypie.com/pic/060427/fDdc.jpg http://b2.lilypie.com/qW3mm7.png

[jennabear]

Evelyn is a name I never liked but now is really growing on me quickly. With a nn of Evie or Ev; just too cute!

But if DH doesn't like it then I'd start looking again. If you both like it and no one else does then go for it! They'll love it when they meet her.

[swampnurse]

Evelyn is my great aunt's name, my mom's middle name and my cousin just named her newborn Evelyn. The cousin is from the other side of the family and didn't even know about the other two! And i just saw that the Social Security Administartion relased their 2005 baby names (www.ssa.gov) and Evelyn is moving up the charts quickly.

So tell your family that apparently lots of other people like it and THEY are the odd balls. :)Too bad for them! Your husband is a different story. You have to LIVE with him and it is his child too, so i'd give him some consideration. BUT...the one who beareth the pain giveth the name in the end!

[JacksMommy]

I agree with PPs that DH should have veto power over the name. But the rest of the family - no way! And since they seem to feel free to weigh in, I'd stop telling them what you're thinking - it's such a downer to have people giving their negative feedback.

I always wanted my dtr's middle name to be Kathleen after my two best friends. Don't think DH loved it but he went along because it's a middle name and plus, DS is the Fifth after the men in his family (including DH) so I kind of felt this one could be "my side" so long as he didn't hate it.

SIL considered naming her son Hercules - a bunch of us were together and we burst out laughing when she told us this. I honestly thought she was kidding and then felt bad when it was clear she wasn't. I noticed she didn't go with it, though. :0

Laurel
WOHM to Jack, 6/4/02
Baby Madeline 12/14/04

[jec2]

When it comes to naming our child(ren) we don't live in a democracy. DH and I get to pick and we don't let anybody know until after the baby has arrived. That is, we don't tell the peanut gallery squat!

[kboyle]

i would...well, as long as dh approved. i would love to name my future daughter that i'll probably never have, Lucy or Lucila (after my Grandmother). DH likes Lucy, but isn't really fond of Lucila, I would really like to use Lucila, even if we called her Lucy anyway.

I KNOW that dh's family would be opposed to the name, but honestly I really don't care...notice the hostility in my typing. :)

If you like Evelyn (which I do) then talk to your dh about it & see if you guys could compromise...you pick that name & he choose the middle, even if you don't like it. I wouldn't use a name that DH didn't like though...we would definately have to agree on something.

[HannaAddict]

Your post is exactly why we didn't share any of our names, short list or favorite name, with anyone until we named our son! Of course, my husband did get to know the names and have input :) . I've found that people are incredibly opinionated and will make very rude, unsolicited comments about names and we didn't want to deal with it. If I really loved the name, I wouldn't listen to other relatives, but would take hubby's input into account. Good luck!

Kimberly

[Lovingliv]

Hi Alicia, Evelyn is a beautiful name! As for who needs to like the name you choose...I would say only you and DH.
FWIW my boy name is nothing he would agree to and I thought of naming the baby when he stepped out of the room....I am embarrased to admit.
Someone on these boards suggested not discussing it till the throws of child birth and then he would "give in" after what I had been through. Well, my child birth was a blessing so I don't think that plan would have worked.
Luckily this baby was a girl. I named her when I was 12, before I knew who her dad would be. He had nothing to say about it.
My boys name he would not budge on.
I still really love the name Elijah. I say stick with what you like.

[BaileyBea]

Lucila sounds like the name we picked for our soon to be DD....

We are naming her after my Grandmother: Lucina and calling her Luci or Lucia. We have even talked about Luciana.

I think there are plenty of pretty variations of Lucy that would work well. Just don't tell anyone in the family what you are naming the baby.


I also think Evelyn is a beautiful name. ;-)

[pampamz]

I wouldn't be able to go with one DH didn't like (nor would he agree to it!). With our first we shared our name list w/family and friends and heard way too many opinions, including Bible references and who did what in the eyes of God etc!

With our 2nd DH and I both agreed ix-nay on sharing our name ideas and it was completely between the two of us.

[DeeEast]

Well for what its worth, we just went through this with the birth of the twins. Both DH and I liked/loved the name Bronwyn. My sister made a concerted effort by calling long distance twice to tell me how much "everybody" in the family hated the name and laughing about how ugly it was. I was very upset. It basically ruined the name for me. I started to worry that people in general would hate her name and laugh at my daughter, etc. (pregnancy hormones!). So when she was born, we named her Diana Bronwyn and call her Diana. Now I like the name Diana fine, but now I really wish we had gone ahead and called her Bronwyn. : ( I still looove the name.

[MarisaSF]

I wouldn't name a child something DH didn't like. He and I are the only people involved in our potential name discussions.

For DH and me, our rule is that nobody will hear "maybe" names. If you say something to family or friends like, "Evelyn or Samantha" there's room for them to say "Oh, don't go with Evelyn. I once knew an Evelyn who...." But if you just say (once decided) "The baby's name will be Evelyn if it's a girl" they don't have any say, iykwim. They can say they hate it, I guess, but hopefully they won't. (ETA: My (often clueless, but lovable) friend said, "Oh don't go with thaaaat." Then I said, "Um. That's the name. We've already decided." And she said, "Oh, I really like it!" :P)

If someone gives a valid reason why they wouldn't choose a name (rhymes with something you hadn't thought of or has an awful memory associated with it), I would consider changing it, but not just because they don't like and/or wouldn't choose it for their own kid. Tough toenails!

[ribbit1019]

I am partial because it was my grandmother's name. I wouldn't have used it for my daughter's name, but it is a beautiful name.

You do have a few months to talk DH into it. He is the important one IMO, everyone else is fluff, they will get used to it. It is your and DH's child so I think what you say should be the most important, and in the end I think you trump him because you have to carry the babe around. :) :) :)

Christy
My Waterbabies
Maddy 6/9/04
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& Jarred 3/8/06, 14 lb 24 1/2" @ 10 wks, a happily breastfed babe.
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[nicoleandjackson]

Oh, yes... ignore the peanut gallery! Better yet, cut them out entirely! :P

DH and I gave our families a choice: they could either know the sex of the baby OR they could know our top choices for boy/girl names. Since our u/s was three weeks before Christmas 2001, our families wanted to buy a flurry of gifts in the "appropriate" color LOL! :)

We called DS "Peanut" until everyone met him in the delivery room and were introduced to Jackson Donald ("Donald" being DH's lovable, wonderful grandfather's name, who was prouder than a peacock!)

FWIW, we had three boy names picked out (or should I say that DH picked out with me having Ultimate Veto Power) but didn't choose until we "met" him and chose his name minutes before our families came in after delivery. Jackson just suits him perfectly!

Good luck and stick to your guns!

Nicole
Mommy of Jackson 4/30/02

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[jhaud]

keep saying it out loud until dh can't imagine not naming a dd that!! of course if he doesn't come around i would consider another name. and i agree with the rest... ignore the peanut gallery (and i love evelyn)

my mil in response to possibly naming dd genevieve said, "you're kidding." and continued to assume it was a joke. after that visit i asked dh to talk with her and i never heard anything more about it. (of course i've never heard her correctly pronounce dd's name either, so maybe this was the problem, but we call her gigi and she CAN say that!

jennifer
sahm to geneveive (8/04)

[jadamom]

Unfortunately, with DD#1, I had to give up my favorite girl name cuz DH didn't like it. I do love her current name now, though. With DD#2, DH and I both liked a name that no one else in my family cared for. We went ahead with it, and we're both happy about it. Ha! :)

[s7714]

I agree. Our family thought one of the names I came up with for our first DD (Annalia) was unusual and they weren't sure what to think about it. Even my DH was a little unsure about it. Our other girl name choice was Samantha and most of the family seemed pretty happy with that. Once DD was born and they looked at her, everyone thought Annalia was a perfect name for her without question.

I say name her Evelyn if that's the name you like (I like it too ;) )! As that saying goes, if you don't like the name I picked, have a kid of your own and name it what YOU want...

Jennifer
Mommy to
DD 3/03
DD 6/05

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