OH my gosh...screaming in the car seat...HELP PLEASE!

[todzwife]

Maddie never really liked her car seat. She tolerated it ok until we moved and had to drive 7 hours. The last hour she cried on and off. I think we scarred her for life because now every time I put her in she screams. Sometimes, if she's completely full and comfortable she'll fall asleep, but usually she fusses until we get to our destination. Well tonight it was BAD. We were leaving DH's co-workers house and I had tried to nurse her prior to us leaving but she didn't want it. So we left. She screamed- I'm NOT kidding- the ENTIRE way home. 45 minutes! I was literally pulling my hair out. If I had been driving, I would have pulled over, but DH wanted to get home. Well, she screamed herself to the point that she threw up EVERYWHERE. Yeah...fun.

Any suggestions? DH wants to go on a trip this coming weekend but I'm scared now!

[DebbieJ]

Is she still in her infant seat? Move her to her convertible!! That did the trick for us.

~ deb
DS born at home 12/03
2 year check up: 25 lbs with clothes on and 35 inches!
BFARed for 20 months and 6 days
(Breastfeeding After Reduction is possible! www.bfar.org)

http://www.bfar.org/members/fora/style_avatars/Ribbons/18months-bfar.jpg

[Rachels]

Convertible, convertible! I'll never buy another infant seat again.

-Rachel
Mama to Abigail Rose
5/18/02
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_amethyst_36m.gif
Nursed for three years!

and Ethan James
10/19/05
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/bf.jpg


"When you know better, you do better."
Maya

[cmdunn1972]

The other problem with infant seats that I noticed is that people tend to forget that they outgrow them when they've reached the height limit. I can't tell you how many times I've seen children as old as 10 months, who clearly should be using convertable seats, strapped to infant seats placed in the grocery cart. (All the while as I'm admiring the baby I'm hoping that their Moms are reserving the infant seat to shopping carts adn not using them in the car.)

On a tangent, how do you subtly remind Moms who are strangers that their children are probably too tall/big to be in the infant seat anymore? Or do you just MYOB in those cases? IMO it's a safety issue so it's a grey area whether or not to keep my mouth shut and some Moms are unaware of the height limit for those seats.

To the OP: On long trips I keep a tote bag filled with small, car-friendly toys. If he starts to fuss I'll start passing toys back one by one. Usually, it's enough to distract him. Also, some kids have a condition where they're hyper-sensitive to sensory input, and that can affect their ability to tolerate car rides. (Some of the OT or PT professionals should be able to tell you more information about it and how to get evaluated/tested.)

[lizajane]

on the tangent...

i sometimes say things like, "we only got to use the infant seat for 11 weeks with schuyler. he was so tall he reached the height limit at 11 weeks old! he was already 26.5 inches, 1/2 inch over the limit. i am very careful about carseats. it just isn't worth the risk to use one that is too small."

[Wife_and_mommy]

Does she take a paci?? The paci and the toy tricks have worked for us. Before I gave DS a paci, I'd lean over and nurse him and that always did the trick.



http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif[/img][/url]

[cmdunn1972]

Thanks, Liza, for chiming in. :) Can I borrow it? ;)

[tarynsmum]

How do you do the "lean". Maybe my boobs are too small (never thought I'd say that one ;) ), but the one time I sort of tried it I looked like a contortionist and I wondered what people in other cars were thinking (I was all over the place)

My DD is the same age as OP's and, while she isn't TERRIBLE in the car yet, we're going on a 11+ hour car trip (lots of stops along the way, but still) in 2 weeks and now I'm scared she's going to freak out. The longest trip we've ever done with her was a little over an hour. Are we nuts?

Sorry for the other tangent.

[ribbit1019]

No your not nuts! I feel for Shandelle though, I've been there. Screaming for 45 minutes home is not fun.

We took DD on an 11 hour trip when she was only 6 weeks old. I had to master the nursing while moving thing since DH didn't want to stop except to change diapers. Sigh.

Anyway, with the infant seat I lean forward and pull the car seat towards me (it has a couple inches of give). I can usually get about 5 or 6 minutes in before I have to lean back and take a break. I would give the pacifier in the mean time. It takes longer to feed baby that way, obviously, but it has worked to calm them both down on different occasions. Hope that provided a little insight. :)

ETA: for clarity, DH is driving, I'm in the back seat.....silly Elizabeth. :) :) :)


Christy
My Waterbabies
Maddy 6/9/04
http://b3.lilypie.com/nlacm4/.png
& Jarred 3/8/06, 14 lb 24 1/2" @ 10 wks, a happily breastfed babe.
http://b1.lilypie.com/KH1pm5/.png
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/steitzsmith/Other/jump.gif

[brittone2]

Another mama that out of desperation learned to nurse DS in the carseat (with my seatbelt on ;) )

DS always hated the car, and even though he's 2, I still do it sometimes on long car rides (we travel 9 hours back to our homestate a few times a year). I wouldn't have survived without being able to do it.

[Wife_and_mommy]

nak

lol. i'll join you in the small boob dept. ;) i've definitely *felt* like a contortionist when i've done it. The bumps kill me too.

Anyway, I usually have to unbuckle myself and lean as far over as I can. It's definitely not a position I can stand for long but when I've done it it's because DC is inconsolably hungry and we're not to our destination yet. Bottom line: get the boob to the baby mouth by whatever means possible..... :P

OP: Another thing when my DC's were teeny is they always preferred for the car to be moving. I'd stop at red lights w/ plenty of room to spare so I could inch up and keep the car moving.

And, Christy! *How* the heck do you do the lean while driving????? Forgive me but I'm LOL at the *length* of those boobs??????????? :P :P :P

ETA: I try to make sure I'm not flashing anyone when I lean but I don't think people really look so it's not a big deal. FWIW, I think very few people would know what I was doing if they even saw.

[ribbit1019]

Don't want anyone thinking I have mile long boobs!!! Though they are getting kinda saggy... :P



Christy
My Waterbabies
Maddy 6/9/04
http://b3.lilypie.com/nlacm4/.png
& Jarred 3/8/06, 14 lb 24 1/2" @ 10 wks, a happily breastfed babe.
http://b1.lilypie.com/KH1pm5/.png
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/steitzsmith/Other/jump.gif

[megs4413]

My Maddie used to scream the whole way home on car rides and throw up when she got really worked up too! I have no idea what the problem was, but it did seem to help when we moved her into the convertible...she was only 4 mos. old, but she was over the height limit as well. If you already have a convertible it might be worth a shot! She also enjoyed a mirror in front of her...it was originally for us to see her but it always slid down and she loved looking in it...though she only stayed entertained for a couple minutes....FWIW, this car seat hating stage only lasted until we put her in the big seat and since then we've had no problems....she's happily RF at 14 mos.!

[annasmom]

Just an aside on your aside, lol! I used my infant carrier way too long with my dd. I just didn't know there was a length limitation, and she weighed so little. I really would have appreciated someone telling me (subtley!) that I needed to change her carseat. By the time I realized it, I was frantic.

[tina-t]

I don't have too many ideas but I sympathize with you. Ds did the same thing for months when he was still younger. He would not tolerate being in the car seat in the car, whether it was the infant car seat or the convertible seat. The most he would stay quiet is 5 minutes then he would start crying. When we finally reached our destination and parked the car, he would miraculously stop. I have tried mirrors and different toys but nothing worked. I have asked several pediatricians and they thought he might be getting car sick.

However, this stopped when we could not stand it anymore and turned him around to front facing when he was 2. We were trying to keep him rear facing as long as we could. I guess, he was able to see what was going around and was able to keep himself entertained that way.

[momathome]

This was (and still is) Julia. From day 1 she hated the infant seat. I moved her into the Britax at 5 months-old and it made no difference. I turned her forward-facing at 14 months-old once she hot 20 lbs and that made no difference. I have given up. Luckily, she doesn't throw up - just screams her head off and no matter what toy/sippy cup/binky I give her, she just keeps screaming. It is nothing for her to scream an hour in the car. No words of advice, just plenty of sympathy. :(

[cmdunn1972]

Sorry for the late reply, I only now noticed your post!

I think there are many Moms who aren't aware of the length limitation, even if the same Moms are fully aware of the weight limitation. One of the Moms in my Gymboree class was mentioning that very thing. (It almost is enough to make me wonder if there should be an educational campaign about it, lol.)

I have a hard time being subtle, so for me if it's not polite to say it outright I just don't say anything at all. However, I've also got one of those faces that people can read like a book. (It makes me wonder what other people are wondering about me when I admire their kid at the grocery store and I notice that their kid is way to old for an infant seat but wonder if I should open my trap! LOL)

[todzwife]

We are going to get a Marathon for DS and move DD into the RA. She's nowhere NEAR the height or weight limit on the seat yet (14 pounds 24 inches) but seems really uncomfortable anyway.

Hopefully- this will solve the problem. :D

[megs4413]

fingers crossed! let us know how she does!

[carriepepper]

I agree with the switch to a convertable carseat it made a big difference in our kiddos comfort level in the carseat. The other thing that helped was figuring out how to BF with him in the carseat and both of us buckled in. I am not sure you want to start this because once I did DS asked to BF anytime we were in the backseat together but at least it kept him quit. When ds was little I would just lean over the seat and let him nurse until he fell asleep. It wasn't always that comfortable but definetly better than listening to him scream. I am fairly large chested so I am sure that helps. Oh and you definetly want a blanket to put around the carseat to avoid people starring. Just another idea. Carrie