Need advice re:sleep

[buddyleebaby]

DD is a late sleeper and an early riser.
She generally goes to sleep around 11 pm, although sometimes she will go an hour earlier or later. Even when she is really, really tired, it tends to take her a while to fall asleep. We have our little routine of reading a book, and then nursing. Then I let my dh rock her and sing to her ( I leave the room). It generally takes her a half an hour to fall asleep, but she will at least lay quietly for him.
She still wakes up one or two times a night to nurse, but this is not as hard as it used to be. Her nursing sessions are at the same time every night, and generally last for only 10 minutes or so. Then, on most nights, she will go right back to sleep.
During tha day, she will take one hour and a half nap in the early afternoon. Sometimes she will want to take a second in the early evening. At first I did not want to let her do so because I thought it might be the cause of her going to bed so late. However, we had her skip it a few days and it was awful. Not only did she still go to bed late, but she woke up all night long. She was just a big crank. After that, we decided that on the days she wanted to take a second nap, we would let her. If she takes the second nap, it is generally about an hour, but again, she doesn't always take it.
She just gets up soooooo early. Last night she went to bed at a quarter past twelve. This morning she was up at 5:15. I tried to nurse her in the dark room, without speaking, to see if she would drift off again but no luck. My dh walked with her around the room and she did fall asleep but woke up again as soon as he put her in the crib. We tried leaving her in the crib and pretending to be asleep and she didn't cry. She just quietly removed all her clothing and threw it out of the crib. Then she sat there babblibg to herself. She obviously was not going to go back to sleep so at this point I got up with her.
Although the times vary, 5-6 hours of sleep a night is pretty typical for her. At first I just thought "well, that's her" and I wasn't too concerned, but then I hear about other babies her age who sleep twice that much and I started wondering.
We are very careful to have a schedule with her during the day, so I'm not sure what I can do (if anything). We tried getting her to go to sleep earlier but she would still wake up 5-6 hours later, ready to go.
Right now she is stuffing cheerios down my shirt, which probably means that I have been typing far too long. Thanks for listening, and for any and all advice/btdt experience.

[heidiann]

I have no advice for you but I'm sending you a big ((((HUG)))! Wow I was cranky b/c my DD sounds alot like yours as far as bed time at night and naps but she will sleep until 11 or noon if I would let her. I usually wake her up around 9 am she will take two naps during the days usually for about and hour to an hour and a half long and then doesn't go to bed until really late. She gets up only once at 5 am for a bottle then will go back to sleep. I couldn't imagine getting up at that time to stay up, GEEZ you have got to be tired girl!

Heidi
Mom to Jillian 10/20/05

[BeachBum]

"They" say that an earlier bedtime makes them sleep later. That is true for my son. If he goes to bed more than an hour later than his usual time he is up at the crack of dawn.
I believe that the suggested average amount of sleep per day is 12-14 hours for a child your DD age.
If I were you, I would start gradually moving her bedtime back by 30 mintues every few days. My son is just a bit younger than your daughter and his bedtime is 7:00. I think that is pretty average.

My son wakes up after about 5/6 hours, nurses and goes back to sleep. I think you might just have to work on that with your DD. If I let DS get up, I think he would. He of course prefers my company to sleeping. :)

HTH

[Momof3Labs]

ITA. Sounds like she is overtired, which will make it hard for her to fall asleep. Weissbluth has good info on sleep patterns in his book (you can ignore the CIO stuff if you don't like that).

[nfowife]

I agree with the pp. Although the late hour might work for you and seem to work for her, she is not getting the recommended amount of nighttime sleep for her age. I would try to get her to a much earlier bedtime. My DD was always an early sleeper- there were times she was asleep for the night at 5:30 when she was younger (with nursing wakeups). She started sleeping through the night at 9 months on her own, and has since gradually moved to where she is now, which is 7p-7:30a (sometimes a little later). I think moving her bedtime earlier will help her to sleep later, and if not, she will at least get more sleep, you will have more time with your DH and newborn, and her naps might even get longer :) .

[MeAndMyStar]

Hi Alicia, my DD is the same age as yours and we had an awful time with bedtime/naptime with her and she was just cranky all the time. I picked up a book at BRU called the no-cry sleep solution by Elizabeth Pantley and it's been a lifesaver! Like PP mentioned, gradually moving bedtime back may work wonders for your DD...it really helped us. (DD goes to bed at 7:30 and wakes up between 6-7 usually.) The author gives many different options whether you are BF or not, co-sleeping or not, using a pacifier, etc. I read the book cover to cover, came up with a *sleep plan* and saw immediate results. I highly recommend this book! HTH, Sarah

[ShayleighCarsensMom]

I too agree...
The later my kids go to sleep the earlier they wake up.
With another baby on the way, you are going to want to get her to bed earlier.
We did it by moving my DD's bedtime 15 minutes earlier every other day until she was at an age appropriate time. We also tried to shorten the bedtime routine as it was a hard routine to have with 2 kids (especially if DH was not home!)
Good luck,

[niccig]

For several weeks I've gone to bed after midnight, and then most of last week I went to bed at 2am and DS woke at 6.30am, DH was out of town. Last night DH was home, I was exhausted and went to bed at 10pm, but couldn't sleep until 2am. I know I've gotten myself into this bad sleeping habit. Tonight I'm going to have a soothing bath, some cammomile tea, and I've told DH he is to help me get to sleep by stroking my hair - always worked when I was a kid. Sleep patterns are a habit. You can help her get more sleep, and thereby you get more sleep too. I have both the Panty and Weissbluth books. I used them together for DS, and I'm going to use some of the ideas for me!

Here's to sweet dreams for all.

Nicci

[buddyleebaby]

Well, I certainly agree with you all in theory. She absolutely needs to be in bed earlier. But how do you go about accomplishing that?

I started our bedtime routine at nine today, thinking that even if it took awhile she would still hopefully be asleep fifteen minutes earlier than usual, and then tomorrow I could try for 8:45. She didn't fall asleep until almost 11;30. So do I just do the same thing tomorrow and eventually she will stop fighting it so much?
I don't want to put her down really early because we did that before and she was just waking up every twenty minutes crying before finally getting up for the day six hours later (which was 1:30 am but she was UP!)

Also, thank you for the book recs. ; )

[MeAndMyStar]

I have found the most important thing in helping DD sleep through the night is the bedtime routine. I didn't realize that the light and sound around her would have so much impact, but it does! We started eating dinner, changing, diapering in a dimmer light with no tv or music on in the house and it really did calm her down alot before bed.

Naps are also essential because they prevent DC from becoming overtired. It's not easy (or instinctual IMO) to ease DC into a more consistent sleep routine and we need advice! Not to sound like her promoter or anything but the no-cry sleep solution by Pantley has been awesome for us. If you get a chance to buy it you can put some of the practices into your DDs routine starting the first night! It's nice to see results right away and very encouraging!:) HTH and good luck!

-Sarah

[melissaflorida]

Huge Weissbuth fan too and just ignore the CIO if you want. His focus is early bedtimes = more deep sleeping.

My daughter is 2 1/2 and stills goes to bed at 7pm. We start the routine with bath at 6:30 then singing and off to bed. She sleeps until 7-7:30am. Takes her nap at 12:45-1ish until 2:30-3.

We have always put her to bed early and she is an awesome sleeper.

We too use a white noise machine and blackout shades.

HTH.

~Melissa
Mommy to dd Spencer 2 1/2

[mudder17]

A little off topic, but related...Nicci, I have trouble getting to sleep and have always struggled with insomnia. I just got the Peaceful Sleep Now CD from Hypnobabies and it is worth every penny of the $15 I paid for it. Seriously, I have been having a much easier time falling asleep at night and last night, when I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, I thought I was going to have a hard time going back to sleep, but I used their sleep cues and was asleep in minutes. I would highly recommend it!


Eileen

http://www.windsorpeak.com/dc/user_files/33734.gif 30 months...

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http://www.windsorpeak.com/dc/user_files/33732.gif for Leah

[Momof3Labs]

Try moving her bedtime in small increments rather than large ones. 15 minutes every couple of days, for example. And don't focus on when she falls asleep, IMO. Keep in mind that she is seriously sleep deprived and it will take time to make this change.

Start darkening the house around 7pm (or whatever your target bedtime is). Close the blinds, keep lights on low, turn off the tv. I can't emphasize how important this all is!! You are resetting her biological clock, remember, and bright lights and stimulation will work against you. Establish a bedtime routine that is calm and soothing, and stick to that routine as you change her bedtime.

At that age, DS1 was going to bed around 6pm. Even now, his bedtime is still 7pm. DS2 goes to bed these days at around 7:30pm but still takes 3 naps a day; I expect that he'll soon start dropping the third nap and we'll move up his bedtime in response.

[buddyleebaby]

Lori, thanks for your response.
I do try and keep the house quiet. We don't have a tv and I just keep a small lamp on in the bedroom during our bedtime routine so I can see what I'm doing. Sometimes it is hard, though, because we live in a noisy neighborhood. I close the windows and put a fan on to try and block out the noise.
So, to clarify, I should just start trying to put her to bed a little earlier each day, regardless of when she actually falls asleep?
She slept like a dream when we co-slept. Makes me miss the good old days.

What should I do about the rest of her schedule? Fot example, she eats dinner now at around seven, and I start trying to put her down at nine. If I am planning to put her to bed at eight, should I bump dinner up to six or so, so she has the same amount of time before bed as before?

[holliam]

I know you have another one coming but if she slept like a dream when co-sleeping, have you considered going back to it? I know there are mamas on here who co-sleep with 2 kids. My DD is 2 and she is still co-sleeping. She likes to have us near her. She can sleep if we're not there, but we are all happier if we are.

Good luck figuring out what will work. My DD goes to bed at 7pm, takes 1-2 hr nap 1x day (usually after lunch) and wakes up around 7am.

Holli

[niccig]

Thanks Eileen. I'll try it. My plan to get to bed earlier last night failed. We've got painters coming in so I'm cleaning stuff out of the rooms, and DH and I got into a fight over his books My opinion: too many and therefore no room for my books so they're in boxes in the garage. His opinion: why are you nagging me. Sigh! Maybe tonight I'll get some sleep....

Nicci