Wedding of an Old Friend

[jennabear]

I have a gift dilemma. DH and I are invited to an old high school friend's destination wedding. We've decided we cannot afford to go to the wedding but we were invited to her reception for those who can't attend the wedding.

Here's my dilemma. She attended my wedding and promised that she would make us our gift. (she is a very gifted artist) We never received it. That was in 2001. Right now we're pretty strapped. We can't afford a gift but I don't want to be rude. I just don't know what to do. DH says we shouldn't give a gift because she didn't but I just don't work like that. I also know that we really don't have much money since DS started school.

What would you do?

[trumansmom]

I would give a gift. Don't go overboard, but get her something.

Jeanne
Mom to Truman 11/01 and Eleanor 4/04

[megs4413]

i would send a nice card. i woudl be PISSED that she didn't get me my gift, and if you really can't afford it...she shoudl just understand....if she really is a friend. it's important to do what's best for your family and if you really dont' have the cash...you can't spend it..period. OTOH, you can give gifts for like a year etiquette wise, especially if you are not able to attend. so maybe sometime in the next few months you'll be able to pull it off. GOOD LUCK! don't feel guilty!

it's probably not a popular opinion, but that's an honest response!

[mamalia]

Just keep in mind your budget and get her a gift from there. I wouldn't think about her missing gift (hopefully she'll get to it one day); just because someone else is rude/forgetful/thoughtless doesn't mean you should be KWIM?

You could purchase her a gift certificate at a discounted price (Costco has them, and someone posted about a website on the bargains forum), create her a gift if you're also artsy, fill a tote with stuff for their honeymoon. It really is the thought that counts...and the positive thought (not the thought that she didn't gift you anything!). ;)

Malia