WWYD? Neighbor question...

[Radosti]

SO, I have a very sweet neighbor and we are becoming pretty decent friends. I ordered the Zim Zam toddler furniture when someone posted a link on the bargain board (I think it was Jo). I ordered two sets because... well, it was ridiculously cheap and why not...

I sent her the link, but she missed the clearance sale. When I received my stuff, she liked it so much that I offered to sell her the second set (table/stool, chair, shelving unit) for the same $25 I paid for it. She was really happy and said she'd give me money later (needed to get it from her hubby). She took it all home.

Now she thinks she paid me. But she didn't. I was actually thinking of telling her it was my gift for her son's birthday coming up. So, I don't care about the money so much as the fact that she knows it's a gift. But she really really thinks she paid me.

How do I handle the situation. She brought me home a "dream dinners" dinner to thank me for sharing the furniture with her. I really appreciated it. So, money is not the issue. I just want her to know that the furniture is a gift.

[dules]

Honestly? I'd let it go, if money is not the issue on either side. Then I'd make a mental note that this is a friend who'll need to be cheerfully reminded fairly quickly in a similar situation again.

Of course, if the $$ is an issue for you, then I do think you'll have to bring it up.

Good luck!

Mary

[Fairy]

Definitelyy agree with dules, for $25, it's just not worth it to pursue any kind of clarification on this. You've got three things here that could blow up -->

1. She's your friend, and if problems arise, you've lost a friend.
2. She's your neighbor, and if problems arise, you have to live with this chick.
3. She already thanked you with the dinner, so clarifying that it was a gift will make you appear to be digging for compliemnts.

I make it a rule to never mix neighbors with money. Every now and then, I break the rules for something I'm sure about. But then if something goes askew and you have to bring up, "um, did you pay me?" and they disagree wtih your interpretation of the disposition of the situation, you're in icky weirdness. For twenty-five dollars, I'd definitely say, ya know what, she appreciated it, she bought us a nicce dinner, it's ok if she doesn't realize it's a "gift," she appreciated it anyway.

So, that's what's I'd do.

[Radosti]

Thanks. I was kinda leaning that way. I guess I'll just let it go and know for future I will need to approach the situation differently.

[jesseandgrace]

If you do decide to say something I would say "I know you were planning on asking your dh for the $25, but I would really love to be able to give this to your ds as a birthday present - would that be ok?" I agree, it is just 25 dollars and it is fine to let it go, but if it is something you think will bother you I think you are polite in saying the above. You aren't asking for the money, you are saying you want to give a gift, is that ok. I guess I would be a little apprehensive about this situation, not because of the $, but because if I were her I would be so thankful to you for giving me the set, that I would be really certain I got you the $ right away, and it just seems a little strange that she didn't. If it were me and I forgot/thought I paid, I would want my friend to remind me because I wouldn't want to have her wondering about me.

[Melanie]

I'd let it go.

[justlearning]

I definitely wouldn't say anything, especially considering that the dinner she brought you cost her probably around $20 (if it's the same price as make-ahead dinners here). Thus, you're almost even anyways. If the issue of equity is really bothering you, then I'd just give her son a nice $10 gift for his party (or even less, considering how much you as a bargain shopper can get for little money!) instead of a $25 gift. She's already thankful that you shared your good deal with here--it's not worth losing a promising friendship over a few bucks.

[oliviasmomma]

ITA with the above comment!

[Radosti]

I was talking to her last night and she said she was saving the furniture for her DS, not opening it or her middle daughter would ruin it before DS ever got to use it. I told her to open it and check for broken pieces anyway. She said that it's a good idea and oh, she still needed to give me money.

I told her not to worry about it and save it for DS's 1st b-day gift from me. So, it all worked out :) Thanks!!!