WWYD Pregnancy Announcement

[blueeyedb]

I just found out I'm pregnant and DH and I had planned to tell our families on Sunday.
My sister, who is TTC just called me and wants to set up some special girl time with my mom and myself on Monday. I have a fairly strong feeling she is going to announce her pregnancy. I don't know that this is the case, I'm just guessing based on some recent chats we've had.
I really, really don't want to steal her thunder, but I also want to make our announcement. Plus I feel that if she is pregnant, I'll steal said thunder whether I announce before or after her. There is also the added complication that I have an ultrasound scheduled on Tuesday and I need my mom to watch my DS. My mom is super perceptive, so there is no way I can get her to watch DS in the middle of the day on a Tuesday without her figuring out what's up.
What should I do here?

[Fairy]

Congrats!

Personally, since you already have one child, I'd let your sister have the thunder and do everything you can to avoid telling or being guessed. Tell your mom you have a pap, tell your mom you have a serious tooth problem, tell your mom the truth on Monday after your Sunday "outing." I know what you mean about people being perceptive. We didn't tell until very late in the pregnancy, but still within the first month, some people guessed. I've now made it a rule to always ask for caffeine-free drinks and make note that I take a pre-natal vitamin, even tho we're not trying. Then it won't be so glaringly obvious if we do end up pregnant (which is not likely).

Still, you deserve to have some attn, so regardless, CONGRATS!

[SpaceGal]

I know how you are feeling about stealing someone's thunder. Like the PP I would tell your mom I was having a check up or some pap test done. If you can trust your mom to keep quiet tell her later on afte ryour sister says something and maybe later then tell your sister.

We didn't really make a "big deal" with our coming baby #2...not that we aren't happy but there are a few around us trying and some that just had babies so I just lay low since I know ow the first ones are just such big and special time for everyone. You can always say you are savoring #2 for you and DH and DC if they ask why you've kept quiet later.

[buddyleebaby]

I guess I'm the voice of dissent. I would go ahead with your announcement as planned. This gives your sister a chance to steal YOUR thunder, and not vice versa. ; )

[Raidra]

I agree, I'd try to announce the pregnancy as soon as possible, so that way your sister would be stealing your thunder.

Or could you tell your sister, in confidence, and see what she thinks would be best?

[denna]

No suggestions just wanted to say CONGRATULATIONS!!!

[Jenn98]

First, CONGRATS! Second, is there a way you can confide in your sister and just ask her which she'd prefer? Maybe it'd be fun for the two of you to announce together - that would REALLY surprise the families!

[lizajane]

i would discuss it with your sister and see if you can make plans to make a JOINT annoucement. maybe a cute card or poster or poem or puzzle or i dunno. my sister is TTC and i am NOT (!!) but if i found out about a surprise, i would go straight to her and see if we could work out a super fun way to surprise our family by telling them together... make them think the hoopla was about ONE baby, and then surprise them with ANOTHER grandchild at the same time. my fam would go nuts!

[dules]

This is what I was thinking - talk to your sister alone first. Then let her help you decide what to do.

Congratulations!!!!

Mary

[AngelaS]

I agree, talk to your sister and announce your pregnancies together. :)

[elizabethkott]

Congratulations!

I agree with PP on announcing together - what fun to possibly have TWO pregnancies at the same time!

[traciann]

If I suspected she was pregnant, I would not mention mine. I am trying to think back of how I would have felt announcing my first pregnancy...maybe I wouldn't feel like you would be stealing my thunder...but with all those extra hormones I just might. Then I would just wait a week or two so she has her moment.

I would tell grandma you have a yearly.

[Piglet]

CONGRATS!!!!

I think that announcing both pregnancies at once would be awesome! If ever there was a way to share thunder - that would be the best way. I will warn you that if this is your 2nd and it is your sister's 1st, she will get most of the attention no matter how you make your announcement. I didn't have anyone pregnant in my family when I was pregnant with DS2 and I must have gotten about 1/3 the attention I got with DS1. Don't get me started on the reactions (or lack thereof) when I announced #3!

[blueeyedb]

Thanks everyone!
I think I am going to talk to her and see if we can announce together. Because this is her 1st baby, I really want her to be the star, so I'm totally okay with her getting most of the attention. Honestly, with DS, there was so much attention that it was (and still is really) a bit overwhelming; it is great to have a loving family, but sometimes it would be nice to be a little low key!

[maestramommy]

You've gotten good suggestions either way, so just wanted to say CONGRATULATIONS! Hope you have a very smooth pregnancy.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I like the idea of waiting till the 3rd month to tell anyone. I think it is just so special to keep the pregnancy intimate for just a little while. Soon enough everyone will know you are pregnant, even if you don't tell them. :) I say keep it your little secret for a while. Let her enjoy some time with it by herself.
(You could tell her privately though so you can share the experience together).

Beth

[jesseandgrace]

I didn't tell anyone until twelve weeks with #1 or #2. Even perceptive parents won't ask questions when you tell them you have your yearly drs appt! I would definitely try to be low key and let your sister take the spotlight. It isn't that second or subsequent kids are any less important, but the experience is so new and different with the first one that it is just different, at least it was for me. I think telling your sister first is a great idea, and then seeing her reaction. It sounds like you guys are really close, and I bet it will be really fun to be pregnant and have a baby at the same time. IMO the worst thing you could do is make a surprise announcement on Sunday when she is planning hers for Monday, I think it is best to make it together after talking to her, or wait a few months and make it then. You and your dh might enjoy the special time with your little secret!

[kboyle]

congrats!!

let her keep her thunder and hold off a few days...i know, it'll suck, but people will think, "oh, how nice, she didn't steal her sister's thunder" ;)

we were going to announce our pg with max at xmas, but BIL beat us to it by announcing his engagement. BUT, we did kind of steal dh's cousin's thunder who announced at thanksgiving.

and we kind of stole same cousin's wedding day by having our baby a few days before...oh well!

[youngmommy]

First: Congratulations!!!!

I haven't read all of the threads, so I don't know if anyone else advised this yet. I'm sure your instincts are correct, but just in case: please be careful when bringing this up to your sister. It may be possible that they aren't pregnant, and it might be doubly painful to find out that you are after they have been trying.

I hope that didn't soind too preachy!

Good Luck!

[spencersmommy]

Hmmm, I do like the idea of announcing together, but I am all for "not stealing the thunder", especially since it's her first. When we had DS #1, we came home to show him all off to family when he was a week old. My BIL and SIL announced they were pregnant with #1 about 1/2 hour after we all got together. I was so mad b/c the rest of the weekend, all they talked about (and everyone else, it seemed)was the baby to be. I felt like my baby didn't get all the attention he deserved. Maybe it was me being selfish, I only had a baby a week ago, maybe it was hormones???? But, I still remember that and am a little annoyed. So, that's my two cents, maybe that doesn't help. But I think I would talk to my sister privately first and see how she feels.
Congrats!!!!!