Baptism

[robinsonbn]

I know I should know all these answers...being raised catholic and I have been to about a hundred Baptisms...but
1) How do you go about setting one up
2) Did we miss our window DS is almost 4mo old
3) DH and I aren't practicing Catholics and are not Parishaners(SP) anywere...does this matter
4) If so does it help that DH's whole family belongs to the church we want to have it done at?
5) How many god parents and do they have to be Catholic?
6) Are there classes or anything you have to do before?

[megs4413]

boy..,.i think a lot of the answers to those questions can only come from the parish. i would call and ask to meet with a priest there to discuss these issues. some churches have actually started doing baptisms all in one day (or a couple days spread through the year) so the practice from one parish to another can be quite different. i don't think you've missed your "window" at all, though! my guess is that calling the church will answer most of these issues for you!

[robinsonbn]

Thanks Yea I am worried that the church only does the whole....during mass baptism which I am not a fan of. I want a small private one with just family...but DH really wants the church.

[madelinesmom]

Meggs is totally correct. Every parish is different. I am not catholic, DH is, we live in Texas and had our children Baptized in Louisiana. We worked directly with the priest at the church where the girls were baptized. Even if it is the same parish sometimes churches (church secretaries) have different protocols. We did the class in our local parish (we had to formally join the church before we were allowed to take the class, I don't know if that will be mandatory where you are, it really just depends on the church...

Honestly I spent alot of time on the phone and it took awhile. We had Madeline baptized at 6 months and Emily baptized at about 5 months. We were unable to baptize during the season of lent, so keep that in mind, it may or may not be an issue with the church you are working with. Good Luck, be patient, and enjoy the day...

HTH

Jane
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[megs4413]

yeah it could be an issue.....everything just depends on the church's policy, really. i would get on it ASAP. there are usually a ton of baptisms in the spring after Easter, but my guess is a lot of those spots are filled up already, so you best step to it! i don't know if you'll be able to get a date before then....

i hope it all works out perfectly.

[kijip]

Answers vary greatly by diocese and even by parish but I will try and address each point.

>I know I should know all these answers...being raised
>catholic and I have been to about a hundred Baptisms...but
>1) How do you go about setting one up

Contact the church's baptism contact. Sometimes this person is head of Faith Formation or a family ministry.

>2) Did we miss our window DS is almost 4mo old

NOPE. The Catholic church generally baptises, as infants with no instruction to the child required, kids as old as 5 or 6 years. Toby was baptised at age 2 and 1/2 and was considered "infant baptism."

>3) DH and I aren't practicing Catholics and are not
>Parishaners(SP) anywere...does this matter

Some places yes. Some places no. You have to check. If you were raised in the Catholic church most church leaders say that you have a right to have your child baptised in the church. Many churches will baptise children whose parents are not Catholic in any way shape or form, however. Still, a small group of parishes want you to pay for them to get copies of your baptism and confirmation papers or will not participate if both parents are not confirmed and active in the parish. Huge variations! We were new to the parish we now belong to, my husband is not Catholic (starting a year long RCIA later this year) and we were able to quickly sign up for the baptism class.

>4) If so does it help that DH's whole family belongs to the
>church we want to have it done at?

Generally yes. Especially if one is to be a godparent or something.

>5) How many god parents and do they have to be Catholic?

Generally 2. At some churches both must be Catholic. At others, 1 may be non-Catholic. At our church, we had to provide 1 Catholic godparent. None of my closest friends are Catholic (most that are Christians are Episcopalians or American Baptist) so my mom was listed as a godparent and my close friend, a Baptist, was also listed.

>6) Are there classes or anything you have to do before?

Almost always there is a class for the parents. 1-2 evenings (or afternoons) to talk about the gift of baptism and the value of a Catholic upbringing and various topics and often included or sep, a rehersal so everyone knows where to sit, when to go up and what to say in response to the Priest or Deacon. You can bring your baby in most cases. I suppose some churches do not have classes, but then some churches somehow complete RCIA in about 2 weeks so you never know.

[robinsonbn]

Thankyou. Good Luck to your DH I have a freind going through it now...a year long process, though I have heard of two weeks. I was also raised catholic and DH sorta was. I have been confirmed ect..but he hasn't. We are going to talk to the church on Friday, keeping my fingers crossed for the not so traditional. Since DH is set on who he wants to be the godfather. Anyway thankyou!

[ribbit1019]

Well here are my answers. Take them for what they are worth. I'm in Ohio too so maybe there will be some similarities.

1) DH called the church and they told us that we (parents) needed to go to class and told us which area churches had them scheduled and when. After we attended the class we called and scheduled a date. The class hosting church forwarded our certificate of completion.

2) DD was 7 months and DS was 8 months, so no. Plus everything Katie said. :)

3) It may, I'd call your DH's family's church. If his whole family belongs than he may too (from when he was a child to adulthood) DH's home parish still considers him a parishoner since his parents are. Even though we are now parishoners at another church across town.

4) See above

5) We were told two godparents and one had to be catholic (both sets of our kids godparents are catholic)

6) see #1 :)


Christy
Wife to Richard
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[KBecks]

You've gotten a lot of good answers already -- here's another:

Call the parish and talk to them.

You didn't miss the window. Most (All?) do not do Baptism during Lent, so you may want to hurry or wait until after Easter this year.

You may need to register with the parish. Different churches vary. Most will hope that if you baptize and are making a commmitment to raising your child in the Catholic faith, that you will get more active in the faith yourselves. So, do you plan to raise your child Catholic?

Normally you need one confirmed Catholic godparent. The second can be a Christian witness.

Normally there are classes, which go over what the sacrament means and helps you understand the commitment to bringing your child into the Christian faith and raising your child as a Catholic.


You can have it at Mass or not. The diference is whether there is communion and other church members.

Hope this helps!

[stefani]

Hi,

I hope I can answer your questions, along with the others:

1. Call the parish.
2. No.
3. It depends on the parish, but generally they are accomodating.
4. It generally does, especially if DH's family is known in the parish.
5. Generally one confirmed Catholic godparent is the minimum, other than that you can have as many as you want :-)
6. We had to attend one class, maybe 2 hours or so? I think generally you do have to attend something, to make sure that you will let your child's faith flourish.

Good luck!

[infocrazy]

Here are my answers:

1. I just called the parish office and set it up. We had the option of during the mass or a group (about 4 infants) baptism after the 12:30 mass, so not in front of the congregation but it's not exactly private. We chose the during the mass and did it during the 4:30 Saturday mass to make it easier for the out of town travelers (& so it was after nap instead of during!) FWIW, after attending a few group baptisms, I am really glad we did DS during the mass. It actually seemed more private and more official. To each their own though.

2. My DS was 10 months old, my nephew was 8 YEARS old. So no.

3. We had moved and I signed up to be members the same day we scheduled the baptism...HOWEVER, when we got married, some churches did have rules as far as being a member to be married there so possibly.

4. More than likely. You can always just join. There is no cost or anything.

5. For us, only 1 has to be Catholic, but different churches different rules.

6. Yes, we had to take a 2 hr class...and we have to take the same one before we baptize DS2.

HTH!

[hudsonam]

For me, this is how it went:

We are Catholic. We didn't belong to a church, and still don't. Luckily my uncle is the deacon at the church that he and my aunt and uncle, and my parents attend, and the pastor there is the one who married us. However, I don't believe you have to be a member of a church to have your child baptised there. I think they can't deny a baby the sacrament of baptism.

To set it up, you call the church where you want to have it done and they'll tell you what the process is. Usually you have to attend a "class," and you have to submit a letter from one or both of your Godparents from their church stating that they are in "good standing" at their church. For us, we were only required to have one Godparent submit that, but they both had to be Christian.

You definitely did not miss your window. There is no window. My nieces and nephew were done when they were in preschool/elementary school, for various reasons. My DS was 9 months old when we had it done.

I think that answers your questions. I'd start by calling that church where your family belongs, and talk to them. Good luck!

[hudsonam]

For me, this is how it went:

We are Catholic. We didn't belong to a church, and still don't. Luckily my uncle is the deacon at the church that he and my aunt and uncle, and my parents attend, and the pastor there is the one who married us. However, I don't believe you have to be a member of a church to have your child baptised there. I think they can't deny a baby the sacrament of baptism.

To set it up, you call the church where you want to have it done and they'll tell you what the process is. Usually you have to attend a "class," and you have to submit a letter from one or both of your Godparents from their church stating that they are in "good standing" at their church. For us, we were only required to have one Godparent submit that, but they both had to be Christian.

You definitely did not miss your window. There is no window. My nieces and nephew were done when they were in preschool/elementary school, for various reasons. My DS was 9 months old when we had it done.

I think that answers your questions. I'd start by calling that church where your family belongs, and talk to them. Good luck!

[kijip]

>You can have it at Mass or not. The diference is whether there
>is communion and other church members.

In my life (many differnet parishes all over the country) I have found that the bulk of Catholic Churches, even very liberal ones, have a policy of baptizing infants at mass. Part of the sacrament is being welcomed and taken in by the entire church. Mass is a critical time for this. It is not at all uncommon for churches to only make exceptions to this rule for a sick baby who they want to baptize without delay. Further, many parishes can only handle so many baptism requests, especially from those that are not active in their parish, and scheduling them for 1 person at a time can be a very cumbersome process. Combining this consideration with the welcoming aspects of the ritual, it is safe to say that mass is generally the prefered timing. My church does 8-12 masses with baptism in a few week period several times a year. Seperate times are not typical at all.

One note is the many churches have a baptism on Easter. That can be a very fun and meaningful time to do it. :)

[KBecks]

Interesting. I wonder if our Arch is more liberal that way.

Many churches here have baptisms either at Mass or at a non-mass baptism ceremony. I've been to one non-mass ceremony where maybe 5 or 6 families are baptising their children at the same event. I'm cantor for a non-mass baptism for multiple families this Sunday afternoon too at another parish. The non-mass baptisms seem to be geared more toward less active families.

I think that having baptism at Mass is the *right* way to do it though. :)

Also, around here, it's usually adults and RCIA that are baptized / confirmed at Easter Vigil. Long night!

[ctmom]

My nephew was recently baptized at a regular Saturday evening Mass and this was the first time ever, and I'm pushing 40, of attending a Baptism at a scheduled Mass for an infant/child. In the parish I grew up in and the parish I live in now, it is common to have the sacrament performed either on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon, sometimes with other families, sometimes not. I attend mass every week and never had and infant/child baptized when there. We were lucky enough to have dd#1 baptized, in a private ceremony at our church, by my uncle who was a priest. DD#2 was also baptized in a private ceremony, but by our parish priest since my uncle has passed away before she was born. It is also common in our parish to have the adults and RCIA baptized/confirmed at Easter Vigil.

Mary
dd#1 2/01
dd#2 12/03