jenjenfirenjen
01-26-2007, 08:47 PM
DS2 has it bad! He is such a mama's boy and I am nearing the breaking point from never getting a break. DS1 clearly preferred mama at this age but still was quite happy to hang with Daddy or Grammie. I even was able to leave him in the child care at the gym. So this is all a bit new to me and I'm not sure if there's anything I should be doing to help change the situation.
DS2 is basically with me ALL THE TIME. I put him down in his crib (which is in my room) for naps and for the first part of the night but he wakes up after 40 minutes for naps and anywhere from 40 min-2 hours at night, at which point I either sling him (for naps) or he comes to bed with me. He sleeps with me, right in the crook of my arm, the rest of the night.
During the day, he's pretty happy to play on his own as long as I'm in the room but when he's had it, he's had it and has to be held or in the sling.
This is all OK with me and I don't think out of the realm of normal for his age (8 months.) The thing that is so hard is that I cannot leave him for a minute. I tried to get out of the house with DS1 last weekend so we could have some one-on-one time. I left DS2 with Daddy and he cried for a solid hour until I returned. This evening, DH gave them their bath together which they both love. I ran out for 10 minutes to pick up dinner. When I came home DS2 was wailing and DH said it started a few minutes after I left.
We are so busy with these two boys and I think I usually care for DS2 because that's the easiest thing to do (I have the boobs after all.) But he clearly loves his dad and daddy cracks him up all the time. But they haven't spent a lot of time together one-on-one. DH is not home for very long during the week and when he is he's usually taking care of DS1 while I put DS2 to bed and whatnot.
I know that playing peek-a-boo and other games that help teach object permanence are supposed to help separation anxiety which we do. Peek-a-boo has been one of his favorites for so long. But it's not helping the separation anxiety.
So is there anything else I/DH can do to help the situation? I know he will grow out of this. Anyone know the approx timelines for these things (is there one?) Thanks for any advice you can give. I love my little babe with all my heart and I'm happy to be there for him as much as he needs but I'd be lying if I didn't say that having a little cling-on 24/7 is really wearing me down.
DS2 is basically with me ALL THE TIME. I put him down in his crib (which is in my room) for naps and for the first part of the night but he wakes up after 40 minutes for naps and anywhere from 40 min-2 hours at night, at which point I either sling him (for naps) or he comes to bed with me. He sleeps with me, right in the crook of my arm, the rest of the night.
During the day, he's pretty happy to play on his own as long as I'm in the room but when he's had it, he's had it and has to be held or in the sling.
This is all OK with me and I don't think out of the realm of normal for his age (8 months.) The thing that is so hard is that I cannot leave him for a minute. I tried to get out of the house with DS1 last weekend so we could have some one-on-one time. I left DS2 with Daddy and he cried for a solid hour until I returned. This evening, DH gave them their bath together which they both love. I ran out for 10 minutes to pick up dinner. When I came home DS2 was wailing and DH said it started a few minutes after I left.
We are so busy with these two boys and I think I usually care for DS2 because that's the easiest thing to do (I have the boobs after all.) But he clearly loves his dad and daddy cracks him up all the time. But they haven't spent a lot of time together one-on-one. DH is not home for very long during the week and when he is he's usually taking care of DS1 while I put DS2 to bed and whatnot.
I know that playing peek-a-boo and other games that help teach object permanence are supposed to help separation anxiety which we do. Peek-a-boo has been one of his favorites for so long. But it's not helping the separation anxiety.
So is there anything else I/DH can do to help the situation? I know he will grow out of this. Anyone know the approx timelines for these things (is there one?) Thanks for any advice you can give. I love my little babe with all my heart and I'm happy to be there for him as much as he needs but I'd be lying if I didn't say that having a little cling-on 24/7 is really wearing me down.