Anyone else NOT let dc play with Barbies?

[JustMe]

This is a spin-off from the Bratz thread for me. I don't allow Barbies in the house. They are not the kind of doll I want dd playing with anymore than I want her playing with Bratz. It wasn't an issue for a long time. She didnt really notice barbies, etc. However, it is becoming a small issue lately.

Without going into long boring details if no one is in the same boat as me, I was just wondering if there is anyone else here who, like me, does not want their dc to play with barbies.

Thanks,
Robyn

[ShanaMama]

I was never allowed to play with barbies as a child, & it mildly frustrated me. Not too many of my friends had them so I didn't feel all that deprived.
With that upbringing, I am really hesitant to allow DD to have them. We're not quite there yet, but I'm sure I'll feel more strongly as she gets closer. I hope to instill in her certain values & healthy body image, & giving her toys that completely contradict that doesn't really work for me.
FWIW, I once heard Barbie's proportions are so off that if she was real she'd fall over. She's that top heavy, lol.

[vonfirmath]

We were not allowed Barbies growing up either. (except for that Grandpa bought one for my sister.) We had some of the non-name brands.

[s7714]

>FWIW, I once heard Barbie's proportions are so off that if she
>was real she'd fall over. She's that top heavy, lol.

They've actually changed her shaping recently to reflect the pubescent body of a waif-ish teen type shape vs. the old buxom bimbo model. ;)

Jennifer
Mommy to
Miss Pure Energy 3/03
Miss Limit Tester 6/05

Our bones may be brittle, but our spirit is unbreakable.
Osteogenesis Imperfecta www.oif.org

[Marisa6826]

My kids had no idea who Barbie was until they saw one of those stupid coming attraction previews for one of the Barbie princess movies.

Even still, they've never seen one in real life.

How strange is it that I'm thankful that they're ALLLLLL about My Little Pony. Sure, they're ugly, but at least they're ponies! :P

-m

[kijip]

>How strange is it that I'm thankful that they're ALLLLLL about
>My Little Pony. Sure, they're ugly, but at least they're
>ponies! :P

Snort. LOL.

I want to shake some sense into whoever is behind those princess movies. They look so...something. I wish I could remember to fast forward through the previews on the DVD. Those ones, and the collection o'Disney princesses kind of creep me out.

To the original poster: I don't care one way or the other. We were not allowed to have them as children but we ended up with them anyways. They all ended up in the microwave or buried in the backyard with short hair...

[JustMe]

Since no one laughed at me, and some seem to be able to at least somewhat relate, here is the issue/question.

Dd has never been that interested in barbies. makes sense to me, I dont see why a young child would be. Anyway, we do have one friend that we saw often enough a while back who has barbies in her house. Dd asked for one and I told her no, without much of an explanation...just that she has enough toys right now. At some point it became clear to dd that I don't like barbies. All this did is that every once in a while, she told me that she does like barbies, end of conversation. Well, this weekend we are going to a birthday party of another girl who is in her gymnastics class. The invitation had barbie on it. The mom mentioned to me that there will be 3 barbie pinatas at that party! I almost wouldnt go, excpet that the mom has been very kind to us, and this party is a really big deal to her. We will go to the party and I will let dd participate in everything. However, I know dd will be confused, ask me questions later about if I think Barbie is bad, etc. I really dont know how to handle this. I want to keep it low-key so barbie doesnt become forbidden fruit, and I dont have a great way of explaining the complexities of barbie to a 4 year old. The only thing I can think of is telling her that she can play with barbie stuff at parties, others' houses, etc, but that I still feel that there are a lot of more interesting toys that she can play with at home.

I would love any other suggestions about how to address this issue with dd.

TIA,
Robyn

[ellies mom]

I actually don't mind Barbie. Now, that I think about it, I did notice that she wasn't as well-endowed lately. For me, Barbie was more about acting out stories and making clothes and other things for her. It was a real outlet for my imagination. Barbie definitely had unrealistic proportions but she was never as sexualized as the Bratz dolls. Well, until they started the My Scene dolls. It is the sexualized image that bothers me more than the shape of the doll

[randomkid]

>The mom mentioned to me that there will be 3
>barbie pinatas at that party!

I just had this image of all these little girls beating Barbie with a stick until she busts open and candy falls out - LOL!

[tarabenet]

I'm with Kim: go enjoy watching the litte darlings beating the snot out of Barbie! I just love the mental image you've planted!

[egoldber]

Honestly the Barbie Princess movies are very girl power. Barbie is strong and smart, tries to find non-violent solutions, and works with the "prince" to save herself and others. No damsel in distress being rescued by a knight in these movies. Generally thay have all good messages.

I was horrified of them before I actually saw one, but they are much more benign, IMO, than the Disney princess movies and we are HUGE Disney fanatics LOL!! My DD has seen and actually owns them all. But she has exactly one Barbie and it was a gift from someone else. ;) No anti-Barbie here (loved them as a child) but I just don't want all the little accessories cluttering up my already cluttered house....

[gatorruth]

Can't you just tell dd that this girl has different parents than you do and all families have different rules??? I tell this do DS (almost 4) almost regularly, wether it is about toy guns or PG (Happy Feet, recently) movies. Then I ask, well, would you want to go live with them??? It stuns him for a minute, then he tells me no and then I say, "well, if you want to live with us, you have to live with our rules."

How does that sound??

Hope this helps.


BTW, I have an aunt who thinks Barbies are almost like the devil for what they do to girls images. Can you find a more realistic doll for her? I"m not quite at that stage, so I can't help there...

Ruth

[o_mom]

> No anti-Barbie here (loved them as
>a child) but I just don't want all the little accessories
>cluttering up my already cluttered house....


This brought back a memory of Christmas 5 years ago when we my niece received some Barbie item. It had about a billion little tiny accessories - shoes, hairbrushes, etc - that just seemed designed to get lost or eaten. The only thing I have found worse is Polly Pockets. :-)

[sdbc]

I don't have a problem with barbies, as long as they aren't dressed slutty. I played with them as a kid, and it was a good imaginative outlet for me. I think that a mother's own body image influences girls more than a skinny, unrealistic doll ever could.

That said, I hate pinatas that are in the shape of people or animals if they are going to be beaten with a stick. I know the PP was just kidding, so this is not a flame. Kids won't know that it's just a joke, though, if you say Barbie deserves to be beaten with a stick in front of them...

ETA: DD doesn't have a Barbie yet, and I'm not pushing it, but we have a family friend who is dying to buy her one. I told her to wait until DD is older and really interested. Right now she likes baby dolls.

Sue, mommy to Aurora (Rory) born 5/13/04

[bisous]

Okay, I'll admit it. I actually love Barbie and all the Barbie movies. I have one DS at this point who is 100 percent boy and could care less about princesses so I have absolutely no excuse to buy, own, or watch the Barbie movies. When I found out I was having a girl one of my first thoughts was, "Oh goody, now I can justify having Barbie and all those princess things!" How sad is that. That said, I'm still a big believer in letting your child find things that they are naturally interested in. If this baby turns out to be a little tomboy more interested in playing trucks and baby animal rescue with her brother, she won't be getting any Barbies from me--I certainly won't be forcing her to be as girly as I am. But if she's game, I am too, lol.

Jen

[SnuggleBuggles]

If I have a girl I will be fine with Barbies and will probably buy the 1st one. I grew up with Barbie and spent years playing with her. I just acted out stories like most any kid would do with a doll. I don't think it warped my body image (or at least it didn't have any more impact on me than the media).

I tried to buy ds one a few times but he was never interested.

Barbie has changed some but even if she hadn't I would just remind dd sometimes that she looked great the way she was.

Beth

[Piglet]

I don't have a problem with Barbie, I will be honest. My parents hated Barbie, and I played with Barbies more than I played with any other toy. I am not sure if it was out of defiance or just because I loved the imaginative play (probably both). That having been said, I didn't play Barbies at age 4 and I also didn't grow up in such a sexualized time. My mom had a good body image, I had a good body image and no doll was changing that. I guess it is a matter of picking your battles. I would rather fight MTV, short skimpy clothes, inappropriate movies, etc. At the end of the day, I agree with the PP that said that our kids get their hang-ups, body images, etc. largely from us.

[masha12]

I am yet to form an opinion on Barbie, but my first inclination is to simply say, "moderation is the key."

My sister and I each had a single Barbie doll when we were young and a few clothes that my mom had made for us. This was fine and we were not Barbie nuts. What I don't like to see are girls who have boxes upon boxes of Barbie stuff.

Based on my experience having one Barbie, if my daughter really wanted a Barbie, I'd probably get her one. The key word in that sentence being "one." And I'd probably get her a few appropriate clothing items (or make them like my mom did). But she'd have to really want one.

There are other things, however, that I would never allow in my house (like Bratz dolls--the name alone gets them banned), and if Barbie really offends you, then you do not have to allow it.

Every parent has their different "things" and you are entitled to stand your ground on Barbie and say no. As a fellow parent, I respect your wishes for your child.

[jenmcadams]

Totally agree with Beth.

We're not anti-Barbie (although Bratz aren't allowed), but my DD is much more into Groovy Girls. However, just wanted to say don't judge the Barbie movies unless you've seen them. They actually have very strong female characters (much more so than a lot of Disney movies) and the stories are pretty engaging.

[maestramommy]

I must've completely missed the body image boat. I don't think I had my own Barbies, but my sisters did, and we spent hours playing with their hair (Eileen learned to french braid doing it on a barbie with knee length hair!), and I think they also had a townhouse. I never really thought of them in more complicated terms than that. It was only when I started teaching at a girls school that the issue even came up. One day I saw a life size poster of a barbie drawing with real-life measurements as a social statement. Someone has to explain to me what it was all about.

Dora got her first barbie a few months ago. It's really a Delta Airlines flight attendent with an outfit, rolling suitcase, and comes in a backpack. Dora loves the backpack, completely ignore the doll except for trying to put her shoes on and off. So it's packed away right now. Dh is more offended that they sell these things instead of selling female flight mechanics and flight navigation engineers :-). His reaction when I brought it home was "Is that thing 20 years old or something?"

[lisams]

For me, it's not a big deal. DD has told me that she doesn't like Barbie, but that's because she couldn't get Barbie to stand on her own, she kept falling over, lol! She got one for her Birthday, not sure where it is but it hasn't been played with. It's probably at the bottom of her stuffed animal basket.

I've started not sweating the small stuff. When I buy toys I look more at the play value - how much will it get played with, how open ended is it, does it encourage cooperative play and imaginative play, etc. I think Barbies could, but DD has no interest. She does love My Little Ponies though, especially the smaller ones called "ponyville".

When I was little, I wasn't that much into Barbie. Maybe it's because my brothers would take her head off and use them to throw in the pool. I loved dolls though, and would play with them for hours.

[MayB]

No Barbies and no Disney Princess. It helps to have an older brother. My DD loves Jessie from Toy Story and Violet from the Incredibles.

[Melanie]

I've started thinking about this a lot lately. I am sure it's only a matter of time before the well-meaning family friends & relatives who have given Ds cartoon character toys and other things not part of our family values, give Dd a Barbie.

Honestly, they fall into the "plastic junky toy I don't want in my home," category. OTOH, I love love love LOVED Barbies as a child. I do not feel their image affected me one way or another. THey were just a fun toy to play with and act out my imagination. Everything in my room became a Barbie accessory of one kind or another. THe best birthday gift ever was the hand-me-down Barbie House (you ladies know the one! It took up half a room!). Any other small doll or animal joined the Barbie families. It was a hard toy for me to grow out of.

What-to-do, What-to-do? I guess I will just keep buying wooden dollhouse dolls and hope Dd doesn't get a Barbie for a while. LOL.

[jadamom]

DD received 2 Barbies as a gift from a relative when she was 3. I put them away in a cabinet, and she almost never takes them out. They don't really appeal to me, and I wouldn't have bought them myself, but I don't have the heart to throw them out either. I don't have a problem with them, unless they're saying, "Math is hard!"