After relaxing the last year with Sydney's eating I have to get SERIOUS

[cmo]

My 2 older DCs (age 3 and 4 1/2) are similar to your Sydney. They love to eat, are always the last one at the table at birthday parties, hovering around snack tables, hitting up kids in the park. It can be a little embarrassing sometimes! They are also at the tops of the weight charts (height too, fortunately). But, I took a look at what they were eating and realized that it is all pretty good quality food, and the best I can do is maybe cut back the amounts and try to keep them active. In situations with food that I can control (meals at home, school lunches, etc.) I am fairly strict on what they get. We don't do dessert, fast food is rare, not many processed foods, fruits and veggies every day. We have cut out all snacks, except for two or three nuts after afternoon nap time to tide them over to dinner at 7pm. They can have as much water as they want, and skim milk for meals. I'd just say do the best you can in situations you can control, maybe tweaking your regular foods and routines a bit, then allow her to just have fun on Friday nights, school & birthday parties, etc. Hopefully as she grows, she will lose the belly (I noticed this starting with my DD just before she turned 4). Trust your instincts and don't worry too much! :-)

-Chris

[Sillygirl]

Traci, I think your instincts are correct. Your issues with food are having an effect on Sydney. At this age, she's going to be able to pick up on your anxieties and it will have an impact on how she interacts with food.

I remember the posts you had last year about it, and you've said in this post that you experienced yourself how painful these issues can be. I really think you need to explore professional counselling for yourself. Changing how you think and deal with food is, I suspect, the absolute best thing you can do for Sydney.

[TraciG]

WHAT !!!!!! ??????????

My issue's with food ! My child eat's normally like any other kid, she has an ice pop every night & one snack a day, two if we're going out to family & having a late dinner. I have laid off BIGTIME in the last year but it hasn't helped, so I am going to try to offer healthier option's & watch more closely at the family event's !

Sydney hasn't seen any anxieties because i've been so easy going with her eating.

[Sillygirl]

Kids aren't dumb or oblivious. She knows. I still think you should get into counselling - I'm not saying it to be mean. You asked for advice and on a diverse board you will get diverse opinions. Counselling is mine.

[californiagirl]

She may not have seen your anxieties about HER eating, but she's seen your anxieties about YOUR eating.

[TraciG]

I appreciate your repies but I don't know if they're correct. I eat normally, she see's me eat , Friday night's we're both the first 2 to sit down for dessert so I don't understand how she see's my anxieties over food !

[sdbc]

Hm, I think it's more about what she eats than how much. My DD is 3 years old, height/weight proportional, but she eats A LOT of food. But she's vegetarian and doesn't eat fatty meats, and she only gets ice cream or cake or something like that as a treat about once or twice a week, and it's usually a small serving. Her staples are brocolli (twice per day, every day--she loves it!), low fat plain (no sugar or sweetener) yogurt, beans, whole wheat bread, cheese, tofu, lots of fruit, fruit/yogurt smoothies (no sugar added), bean/cheese quesadillas. She gets pizza once per week, and we go out for Indian or Chinese once a week, but she has never had fast food, and doesn't get chips or anything like that except at birthday parties (maybe once per month). She also only gets juice at birthday parties or when she's constipated. These foods (lots of fruits and veggies) have the added bonus that she almost never gets sick even though she's in daycare!

Small treats/snacks every day can add up for a little kid.

Sue, mommy to Aurora (Rory) born 5/13/04

[TraciG]

wow great diet ! In Sydney's school they give a snack of juice & some kind of crackers or small cookies, they have improved a lot at the school, it used to be mostly cookies until most parent's complained ! On school day's she doesn't usually have any other snack's.

[cstack]

I'm not really understanding? In some of youre posts, you're saying she eats normally, and in the OP, you're worried about her time at the desert bar. Is the desert bar time only on special occassions and she eats normally the rest of the time?

My take on this - kids grow at different rates. Babies and toddlers go through rapid period of growth, then slow down, the cycle again - it's normal. My DD, now 14 was FAT as a baby, toddler, and preschooler. She weighed almost 18 lbs at 3 months. As a baby, her thighs were larger than my forearm. She had no wrists, just a fat arm that led to a fad hand that looked like someone snapped a rubber band around it in the area of the wrist. When she sat in the tub, her lower half fat floated out like a shelf. She stayed chubby right on up to the time she was four. To make matters worse, she was tiny short. Then she hit 4 1/2 and sprouted up and thinner out. She has been a healthy weight ever since. I didn't make a big deal of it and I didn't let it worry me. It all worked out.

I wouldn't worry until she gets a little older. She just may need to have her body mature a bit.

[bisous]

It sounds like she loves to eat. That is not a bad thing in itself and I can certainly relate to it! Food can be a wonderful thing to enjoy in this life and every child has different likes and dislikes. I think that this is a great time to start thinking about attitudes towards food and establishing healthy ones. I'm not an expert but dealing with my own issues about food and my DS who is Type 1 Diabetic and has no issues at the moment but much potential later on since he food will affect him a little bit differently than your "average" kid.

These are some things that I think will help:
1. Embrace every healthy food. Buy quality and experiment at the grocery store with cool vegetables and fruits. Try ethnic foods that incorporate lots of spices and seasonings instead of fats, salts and sugars. These need to be enjoyed by the whole family. The culture of the way that the family eats will be observed and internalized by the children in it.

2. If sweets and other things are totally restricted from her diet, Sydney will not learn how to regulate herself. My parents almost never let me have candy (which is mostly a good idea) but whenever it was offered to me I would go absolutely hog wild. On halloween I'd eat my whole stash in a day I think because I was never sure when I might get some again so I'd better finish it off. I recommend having a small daily or even semi-weekly snack that she really looks forward to. Make it in only small amounts.

3. Teach her that good food is available all the time. She can afford not to stuff herself because if every she is hungry later, there are other options and things she can try. I can imagine this would be really difficult in a 3yo but I know that is part of the success behind the way that the French eat. I lived there for 18 mo. and was always amazed that they could say they were full when there was delicious cheese or pastry being offered. I asked them and they said that if they were hungry then they could have some later so there was no need to be stuffed.

4. Remember that preference for sweets or salty food is inherent. People are born preferring one or the other or both. I read this in book called "You the Owners Manual". However, preference for fatty foods is learned. This can be a way that you help your family. If fatty food isn't offered, it won't be missed.

I hope this helps a little. I know some of it is "theoretical" rather than practical but I think formulating a positive attitude about food is so important. It can be a great and enjoyable part of our lives and it can healthy at the same time. The balance is hard to figure out but worth it. :)

HTH

Jen

[MarisaSF]

You noted in your OP that the doc thought your daughter was "eating out of spite"? What did this mean exactly? I interpreted it as you had told her not to eat something or to eat less of something and that she was asserting her independence in one of the few ways a toddler has... by eating whatever you wouldn't allow.

Since *I* can see your anxieties about food just by reading a few posts, I think your daughter might be picking up on even more.

[miki]

I think Jen's suggestions are very helpful. If your kid, likes to eat, you can teach her how to eat in a healthy way. My kid loves to eat. I try to give her as few processed foods as possible to avoid too much fat, salt, and preservatives. Most of her snacks are fresh fruit. If she doesn't finish what I set out for her, I cover it but leave it accessible to her. She knows it's there if she wants more and she rarely gets more after she says she's full. If my kid goes begging for snacks from our friends at the park (or even kindly strangers who don't mind sharing), I will tell her it's too close to dinner so she may not have the snack.

I think it's important to remember also that your kid is small and one snack, depending on what it is, can actually contain a significant fraction of the calories she needs in one day. You mentioned in a previous post that your DD eats an ice pop after dinner each night. A regular ice pop is a big hit of sugar, empty calories. You can look at individual items like that and replace them with healthier options. What about half of a frozen banana on a stick or a fruit kebob for dessert instead?

[Tondi G]

well I can relate. My older DS is a BIG BOY. He was off the charts for height and weight always. He is now 5.5 and is 4 feet tall and 78 lbs. He is chunky. There is no denying it. We have been slipping and letting him snack too much. He had too much juice when he was younger. It is not his fault and we are working with him now to attempt to get him to control his portions and to choose healthier foods. It's tough cause he loves his Annies mac n cheese and pizza like many other kids. we just have to balance it out better with more vegis.

My ped always said to us you control the quality of the foods and he controls the quantity. Now we are having to control the quantity too! We have him enrolled in Tae Kwon Do 2 or 3 days a week and he LOVES it! They are really encouraging and he works hard for 45 minutes straight... comes out hot and sweaty. we are also trying to get him outside playing and riding his scooter rather than planted on the couch. He is like me, he snacks when he's bored so we're trying to redirect him and get his mind off snacks and get him focused on playing and being active! He'll get there, I know it!

You just have to try to be sure what is going in is good quality food... up the vegis, fruits and lean protein and cut back on the carbs! Encourage her to drink water... sometimes when they think they are hungry it's sctually their body need fluids! Hang in there! I know exactly how you are feeling. I don't want my kid to be the fat kid that gets teased and has to deal with weight issues all his life. He is built a lot like my DH who was a chubby kid and then his 9th grade.. sprouted and turned into a beanpole skinny kid. His mom was actually worried about his skinny chicken legs at that point!

~Tondi

[o_mom]

Just for another side. DS1 is the ultimate moocher. He is always begging at the park. He would eat 2 bowls of oatmeal, a banana and a glass of milk and then we go to BF group an hour later and he is mooching cheerios and goldfish off all the other kids.

He is tiny, though - 25%-50% height and weight. I think the mooching thing is just the way some kids are and not so much related to eating habits/weight, but the novelty of the stuff.

[o_mom]

One thing I have noticed, and several other parents I know, is that a weight gain with the belly bulge is usually followed by a height spurt. It is almost predictable when the pants started getting tight and they get the pudge in front, that a month or so later they would gain an inch or more in height and it all evened out. Just keep in mind that they do go in spurts and that what seems like quite a lot at one time may be followed by little or no gain for several months after.

[brittone2]

I have one of those kids on the other end of the spectrum. It is tough in either situation.

Can you give us an idea of what her staples are? Like, what she eats typically for breakfast, lunch, dinner? Maybe people can come up with some healthier suggestions?

How about a snack tray? MDC has a great thread about toddler/preschooler snack trays. Basically offering a huge variety of healthy items in a muffin tin or similar...different item in each cup. That way she can snack/graze, but everything is really nutrient dense.

How about offering fruit and veggies before a meal? Offer it while she's really hungry and you are finishing up cooking? That works sometimes here.

When we do anything sweet, etc. I take the approach of offering it with the meal, so it isn't special. It is food. We don't do a lot of junk, so even if he eats the sweet item/dessert first, I figure that the rest of the time his diet is healthy enough it doesn't matter. I guess I think that most adults tend to view dessert as a "treat" and well...then we get into the cycle of rewarding ourselves during times of stress, celebration, the list goes on and on. We just serve a small portion right along with dinner.

Even w/ eating out and the preschool snack, if what she has at home is unprocessed, nutritious food, she would be eating pretty healthy 90 percent of the time. If you are offering healthy meals at home, I'd say don't worry about it. If you need ideas for healthy items, I'm sure lots of people can offer suggestions. Not sure what she eats at home, but if there is junk/processed stuff, if you don't buy it, it isn't an option. If you are offering mostly healthy, nutrient dense stuff, than I would just try not to worry about her weight gain and figure that it will work itself out in time.

[Piglet]

You might think you have it under control, but your first sentence in your post is very telling, "UGH, I have been worried with her eating & weight gain for as long as I can remember". I can understand if you were worried in the past year or so, but to be worried about her weight gain when she was an infant is not healthy. I also remember a number of your posts about how woried you were about the big meals at your ILs or the other food issues you have been dealing with. I really don't think that Sydney is any different from most kids her age. We also have big meals Shabbat meals every week. There is a lot on the table, there are usually good desserts, etc. My kids go through weeks when they barely eat anything and weeks when they can't get enough. They also want dessert, of course. I don't limit their food when we have special meals, but I do my best to give them healthy meals the rest of the week. I really do think that Sydney is just being a normal kid - give any typical kid the option between cake and broccoli and they will choose cake. I would also really suggest trying to come to terms with your own food issues. I was a chubby kid (I loved eating then and still love it now), but I have also always been very happy with my self-image (maybe not the most hunble sentence I have ever typed, LOL). Sydney should know that she can be proud of her self-image no matter and you are the person that has to teach her to lover her self-image.

[niccig]

You may already be doing this, but are you watching portion size? Children's stomachs are as big as their fist - which is pretty small. You could put a small amt of food on her plate and tell her when she's finished that she can ask for more. She might not want more, but eats because it is in front of her.

I learnt the clean you plate attidude as a kid and eventhough I eat lean meat, whole grains, lots of fruit and veg, I couldn't work out why I wasn't losing weight. Once I started having only 1/2 cup brown rice/whole grain pasta as a serving, I started to lose. Most people overestimate portion size.

You could also swap out some food - you said she likes icepop's - you can freeze grapes, blackberries, blueberries, raspberries. I chop them up as my DS is 2.5, and he either eats them plain or with a bit of yoghurt. You could even find recipes for healthy icepops and make your own.

Bread and ceral isn't always healthy - look for ones that have high fiber content (4g or more per serving) and low sugar.

There are tons of substitutions you can make and not feel deprived. My DH has high cholesterol, so we substitute a lot of things.

If you do some tweaking of her diet and as Tondi said, get her active outdoors, you'll feel better as you're helping her be as healthy as she can be.

Nicci

[s7714]

ITA. I noticed this very thing with my younger DD. About six months ago and again just this last month I thought for sure she was out growing her clothes because the waistbands were getting extremely tight on her pudgy belly. Within about 3 weeks of noticing that she shot up in height dramatically. Maybe they just pack in the calories to fuel the growth spurt.

In regards to the OP though, did the doctor do a panel on her blood to check for things like hormone inbalances, etc. (esp. like thyroid)? Aside from that, I think it'd be best just to work on creating a healthy lifestyle for your entire family that contains *both* a healthy diet and exercise that will make all of you feel better.

Jennifer
Mommy to
Miss Pure Energy 3/03
Miss Limit Tester 6/05

Our bones may be brittle, but our spirit is unbreakable.
Osteogenesis Imperfecta www.oif.org

[elaineandmichaelsmommy]

I have no suggestions really as to how to proceedd with your daughter. I just wanted to say that you should proceed VERY carefully. I was an overweight preteen and ever since have had problems. As a child I had no weight issues at all. Then my mother took me to see a developmental specialist who told her I had a learning disability and it was all downhill from there. Children are so easily influenced, many times in ways that we don't even notice.
If my mother had just once reassured me that I wasn't stupid,or even just as smart as my brother or sisters. Maybe things would have been differant. I sought comfort in food, and that only compounded the problem since my mother had huge body image hang ups. I've only now at the age of 33 begun to understand what happened in those years and they've begun to explain so much.
Your dd is so young and little, I would try to make as little of this as possible. And I do mean very little. If the pediatrician hasn't announced her overweight. OR said that her health is in jeapordy I'd seriously recommend letting it go. There's such a good possibility that she'll outgrow this stage.


I understand that you want to protect her and not have her be teased. Believe me I was teased terribly. I really want dd to have a wonderfull childhood.

Please keep in mind that even the littlest things make such a large differance to little ones, even taking her to the doc just for her weight it something that she'd notice. Just do your best to give her healthy food and I'm sure that eventually she'll be fine. I wish I could say more but I'm afraid that's it. I really hope everything turns out well for her.

[Saartje]

>I appreciate your repies but I don't know if they're correct.
>I eat normally, she see's me eat , Friday night's we're both
>the first 2 to sit down for dessert so I don't understand how
>she see's my anxieties over food !

Traci, I think Katie's right. You should try to get counseling to overcome your own issues relating to food. You think your daughter can't see your anxieties, but if it's this clear to a bunch of people who have never met you in person, it's much clearer to Sydney.

Being the first two to sit down for dessert on a regular basis is a telling detail; that suggests you're more food focused than your in-laws, and possibly that you're eating sweets to deal with a stressful situation.

Even more concerning, I remember you posting when Sydney was barely a year old about how she came running every time you were eating something and you felt the need to hide to keep from sharing with her. That's not a healthy attitude toward food. It's normal for a toddler to want to share whatever Mommy is eating. It is not healthy for *you* to feel that you can't share bites, or that you can't put off eating things you don't want your child eating until she's sleeping.

This is an ongoing problem, and I don't think you're going to be able to resolve it without help from someone. A professional is the proper person to talk to about these issues. Give it a try — there's no shame in needing help, and not getting it may damage your daughter when she grows up.

[MommyAllison]

Beth, I PM'd you :)

Allison
Mama to DD 11/05

[deborah_r]

My first reaction is, I'm not sure what you mean about "get SERIOUS". Everything I hear about feeding children, and what I remind myself of all the time, is you can only control what foods she is offered. You can't make her eat more or less, really, or control what she chooses to eat from what you have offered. Well, I guess you could make her eat less (I've never had to think about it from this point of view - mine doesn't like food much) - but what are you going to do when she says she's hungry? Tell her "no"?

I agree with some of the other suggestions about starting her out with regulated portions and seeing if she asks for more. if her plate is being piled high with food, she may just be eating because it is there.

And I am certainly not a healthy fods all the time for my kid, but the "ice pop every night" did jump out at me. There's actually not anything (besides milk and water) that I have gotten in a routine of him expecting it every day. I try not to let that kiind of pattern establish, in case I then decide later I don't want him to have that thing every day. We just try for variety from day to day.

[DebbieJ]

>Kids aren't dumb or oblivious. She knows. I still think you
>should get into counselling - I'm not saying it to be mean.
>You asked for advice and on a diverse board you will get
>diverse opinions. Counselling is mine.

ITA.

~ deb
DS born at home 12/03
Breastfeeding After Reduction is possible! www.bfar.org

http://www.bfar.org/members/fora/style_avatars/Ribbons/18months-bfar.jpg

[stillplayswithbarbies]

Have you read the Ellyn Satter books that were suggested to you last year, and the year before? I think the first suggestions were for her book "Child of Mine, Feeding with Love and Good Sense" back when Sydney was an infant and you were still nursing her, and then the next year the suggestions were for "How to Get Your Kid to Eat, But Not Too Much".

Did you ever get those books? They would be very helpful for you. Although at this age you might as well skip the first one and just get the second one.

[kijip]

If a well fed toddler's jeans are too tight, the likely problem is that they need bigger jeans. If she is eating mostly healthy foods, playing/running around and has no health problems, I fail to see why having a child in the 95% percentile is a problem. My son is above the 90% for height and weight and he is just big and healthy, not fat. He will pudge up a pound or three and POP he is one inch taller all but overnight. You need to calm down and read the books and resources you have been suggested since she was less than a year old. The best way to have a child with an eating disorder or weight problem is to stress out about normal toddler baby fat. She is internalizing your feelings on a daily basis.

[psophia17]

N is, like me, a lover of food. He has his first snack about an hour after he has a healthy breakfast, and generally snacks every hour or so through the day. It has been this way since he went on solids - he enjoys food, and I'm thrilled with that - what on earth would I do with a child who didn't love food?

I had huge issues with food as a child. I was the pudgy middle sibling, with the skinny older sister and the brute little brother. Because we were poor and I didn't fit the hand-me-downs, my mother put me on a diet. No snacks, rare treats, everyone else could have a full dessert but I could only have a spoonful. When I was 10yrs old, I had a daily nekkid weigh-in. Every night, I would sneak downstairs and eat and eat and eat. My mother couldn't figure out why I was so heavy. It was the most traumatic experience of my life, and I often wonder where I would be if I hadn't had to fight for my self-esteem the way that I did.

Please, please, for Sydney's sake, try to get a grip. Stop weighing her. Have snacks ready for her, so if she's hungry she can get them herself. Make food a non-issue. N knows that if he's hungry, he can have as many snacks as he wants, but cookies are a one-a-day kind of thing. I will not allow food to become an issue in my house.

[TraciG]

yep that's what he meant about her eating in spite, but it's not true, she does it no matter what, she just love's to eat & especially loves sweet's !

[TraciG]

what , I wasn't worried when Sydney was an infant, she was tiny then it probably started around a year old or maybe after, can't remember

[TraciG]

I am the first to sit down to dessert otherwise Sydney would sit there alone & taste everything so I have to watch her . Yes I did have to hide eating otherwise she'd want to eat another meal not just a few tastes !

[TraciG]

Wow Tondi, it's nice that someone can relate ! I am going to think about her daily food also & try to cook healthier dinner's. Sydney drink's water all day, she only has juice at school & on day's off one cup of OJ .

Today she had an english muffin with a mall amount of reduced fat cream cheese & a half of a thin slice of American Cheese, lot's of times she eat's multi gran waffles with the reduced sugar syrup, I am going to try to cut down on this, I looked at the box & it has 6 gram's of fat .

lunch is usually peanut butter & jelly or bologna, I offer fruit but have to push her to eat it, she usually eat's her fruit after dinner & bath .

Dinner is where I need help, I am not creative or a good cook, we eat spaghett & meatballs or sauce at least once a week, chicken cutlets, breaded, brocolli baked potatoe, steak, meatloaf stuff like that, she does eta an ice pop but they have fruit juice in them & they're the small one's , 30 or 40 calories.

[brittone2]

Okay, please don't think this is an attack on what you are posting she eats, just trying to healthy it up even a little more. I know I like brainstorming and reading what other people feed their kids to get ideas myself. I'm not bashing what you are doing, just trying to offer some ways to make it a little more nutrient dense or healthier.

There are all different philosophies on this, but I am a believer that healthy fats aren't a problem. I'd stop looking so much at the fat content on what she's eating, and just look more toward stuff that isn't from a package or a box in general. Nothing with hydrogenated/partially hydrogenated oil (because this is trans fats basically, even if labeled "0" trans fat on a label...there's a loophole on the labeling so if it has a half gram or less of transfat, they can say 0). In any case, I'd look more at ingredients and just cutting out the stuff that is processed in general.

I think healthy fats and *protein* can do a lot to promote a sense of fullness. I have PCOS and insulin resistance, which means if I eat a lot of carbs, my insulin levels shoot up and I feel hungry an hour later. So far at this point in my life, I've never had a weight problem, but from a health standpoint, it is important for me to eat protein with every single meal. Cravings for sugar are often worse if someone isn't getting enough protein (it doesn't mean Syndey is necessarily insulin resistant, but lots of people find that protein helps with cravings and avoiding junk).

So my suggestion there would be to make sure she has ample protein and some healthy fats with every meal.

I'd start by cutting out most of the empty calories. Orange juice, the syrup, ice pops. Basically none of those are very nutritious and are empty calories. You can try making substitutions that are more healthy. Will she eat a smoothie? That could be any meal during the day (yogurt for protein combined w/ some fruits, you can even throw in a leaf or two of spinach or kale without it being detected). Leftover smoothies can be frozen into popscicles if you buy your own mold. That way, at least she's getting some fruit and veggies and some protein and it still can look fun to her.

For the multigrain waffles, what is the first ingredient? Even multi grain things often have "enriched white flour" as the first ingredient, which means...well, basically white flour and empty calories. They can call it multi grain if they just toss a handful of grains into a big old batch of white flour. Look for whole wheat flour as the first ingredient (maybe yours do have this?). Try offering her some fruit on top of the waffles? Yogurt to dip it in?

She's eating a sandwich every day for lunch. Is it on white bread or 100 percent whole grain bread? Because white bread or anything with "enriched wheat flour" as the 1st ingredient is pretty much just empty calories and carbs. Look for something with whole wheat flour as the first ingredient, or that says 100% whole wheat flour on the front of the bread bag. Even better, look for one without high fructose corn syrup (will likely need to get it from whole foods or a health food store). Again, sometimes stuff is labeled "12 grain bread" or similar but really is mostly enriched white flour as the first ingredient, with a handful of "grains" tossed into the batch so they can call it 12 grain. That stuff can be deceptive.

Can you whip up something like a batch of chicken salad? No nitrates/nitrites like most bologna, and I think a lot of lunchmeats contain sugar in the form of high fructose corn syrup. On weekends I try to cook two whole chickens and we chop and freeze. It is a really great starter for a lot of stuff. Add some mayo, and we add fruits and veggies and nuts to it. We'll do apples, raisins, mayo, chicken, sometimes some walnuts and a little curry powder. You can add quartered or halved grapes and some almonds or wanuts. That's like a meal right there, even without bread. Lots of protein. A little fat from the nuts and mayo, but personally I think that can be a good thing. Do you think Sydney would eat something like that? It takes a little time to prepare, but you can whip up a big batch and the two of you can eat it for lunch for several days. I can give you other ideas if you don't think she'd eat something like chicken salad.

For spaghetti and meatballs, can you switch to whole grain pasta if you aren't already using it? You can finely chop veggies and add to the sauce or the meatballs (really finely chopped or pureed cooked carrots, spinach, broccoli, kale, etc.) It takes a few extra mins but then you aren't bugging her to eat her veggies. You can also add that stuff right to meatloaf.

Maybe try offering veggies/fruit cut up while she's very hungry and before you serve the rest of the meal (while you are prepping/cooking). Maybe try some fun stuff to dip it in. Hummus, salad dressing without high fructose corn syrup, a little dish of grated parm?

I really wonder if you upped her protein and healthier fats if she wouldn't crave sugar so much. Eating refined carbs, especially for like 20% of the population that is more prone to insulin spikes, really can set you up to want more, more, more carbs very soon afterward.

If these ideas won't work, tell us more and we'll try to brainstorm some other ideas for you. I have a toddler that eats like a bird a lot of the time, and I know that the suggestions I read elsewhere won't always work for us (he could care less about "dipping" something which almost all other kids seem to like LOL).

Rather than counting calories or fat grams, I think just focusing on less refined stuff and more nutrient dense food with protein and healthy fats would be a better use of your energy. But like all things nutrition, my opinion is one of about 1000 out there, which doesn't make it easy to figure out how to approach things.


ETA: for creative inspiration, this blog is very cool:
http://veganlunchbox.blogspot.com/

Yes, she goes to lengths that 99 percent of us are not going to do in terms of cuteness, and I'm not vegan (was a vegetarian for over 10 years in the past though). I also don't do a lot of soy products. But you can "de-veganize" some of this stuff and use it for inspiration. Even something like the presentation and diversity in the lunchbox might interest Sydney? It is admittedly over the top for most parents, but I've found some great inspiration from her site that helps me get ideas when we need to change up what we're eating.

Edited again to fix a sentence that made no sense whatsoever.

[o_mom]

ITA with this, Beth!

We focus much less on fat content for the kids (more for DH and his cholesterol) and try to keep the sugar down.

We have cereal for breakfast much of the time because it is easy and I know they will eat it. However, I am shocked at how much sugar is in most cereals! Even ones that you would think are healthy, such as many varieties of Cheerios, can have 10+ grams of sugar per serving. I try to keep them under 5 grams per serving and usually less. It does mean some less kid-oriented cereals, but then we don't get the ads on the box, either.

I have yet to find 100% whole wheat bread w/o HFCS that we can afford on a daily basis, which is a bummer.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I also do not read labels for fat content for ds. I think there is a place for normal fat in diets. Just not trans fat. Same thing with things like HFCS- which is probably the #1 ingredient in the reduced sugar syrup. I give ds the real stuff and he dips his waffles and pancakes into it just a little. I don't think he even consumes a teaspoon of the stuff at a time.

I just stay away from diet foods since they often add yucky things. Then again, I am a major natural food store snob. I cringe every time I label read at the mainstream grocery store.

Good luck!!!

Beth

[elliput]

Beth, thank you for this great post. There are some great suggestions for everyone to be found here.

[deborah_r]

>
>I just stay away from diet foods since they often add yucky
>things. Then again, I am a major natural food store snob. I
>cringe every time I label read at the mainstream grocery
>store.


I also avoid all of the "reduced this" and "low that" and especially "sugar free" because I know they put in all kinds of crazy stuff to re-create the flavor, and I trust that less than just having the darn sugar, fat, whatever.

[Moneypenny]

One little tip that really helped me with DD's eating is that you just keep offering a healthy food, even if she doesn't seem to like it at first. For example, for over a year I have put broccoli on her plate. She usually takes one bite and then announces that she doesn't like it. Well, lo and behold, last week she ate a whole serving of broccoli! And spinach, too!

When I am the one who is in charge of what she is being offered (so this excludes big family dinners like you describe) she gets healthy choices. If she decides she doesn't want to eat any or all of it, that is her choice. In situations where other people provide the choices, I also have no problem with limiting the unhealthy items to a few bites or bringing my own stash of whole grain crackers, fruit, etc to offer her as replacements. It is perfectly acceptable for you to tell her she can have 1 cookie and 1 small piece of cake and that is it. Now, we don't totally exclude sweets from her diet. Every morning she gets a few sips of my homemade hot chocolate and every week she goes with her dad to the coffee shop and gets a muffin or mini chocolate cake.

I think I have a pretty healthy attitude about food and my weight and fitness level is pretty good. When I think about how my parents dealt with food, they followed some pretty basic rules: most of the food they offered was healthy - no sweetened cereals, no packaged dinners, lots of fruits and veggies; we did always have sweets in the house - every weekend my brother and I would help my mom make cookies or brownies and we could have one every day (again, these were homemade so a little less unhealthful than pre-packaged cookies or ice pops); encourage physical activity. I think you just need to keep it simple and remember that you are in charge of what kinds of foods she has to choose from.

Susan
mama to my cutie pie, Avery
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_sapphire_24m.gif[/img][/url]

[deborah_r]

>
>I am worried, I don't want my child to get older & have a
>weight problem & get teased in school ! I hated myself in
>school & was so shy & self concious ! I always tell her she is
>beautiful & smart so I hope that helps !
>



I've been reflecting on this and it's kind of a sad comment on gender biases in this society, IMO. You know, I worry about exactly the opposite with my son? I am worried he is going to be the scrawny little guy who can't defend himself and gets beat up and picked on. But you are in a different place than me, kind of, because while I suppose you *could* make her eat less (not sure if it's a good idea), I *can't* make DS eat more. He just doesn't. I am in an opposite position where I need to find ways to make what he eats be as fatty and high-caloric as possible! I still be whole milk just for him and he's almost 4. And I usually add Carnation Instant Breakfast to it.

It's tough either way, this whole eating thing!

[TraciG]

I have to read this again, on my way out, but I like your idea's, it's the kind of post I needed, one with help & suggestions !

Going to read again when I have more time

[MissyAg94]

I am currently reading Dr. Sears' book "The Healthiest Kid in the Neighborhood" and I really like it. It focuses on how to feed your entire family well and makes alot of sense.

Sorry that you are worried about your daughter. I know it must be stressful for you.

[DrSally]

Stop and shop's own "health foods" brand "Nature's Promise" has 100% whole grain bread sweetened with honey. It also doesn't have milk/eggs, so that's what I feed to DS. They also carry Nature's Promise organic o's. Both are around 2.50 I believe. I agree that I would focus less on fats (as long as they're the good kind) for a toddler, and more on processed foods with transfats, simple sugars, lots of chemicals, and empty calories. Also agree with pp's about protein and good fats helping a person to feel more satisfied, and paying attention to portion size.

I grew up in a house with rare desserts and no soda. We only had milk and water for dinner. I wasn't allowed to have any candy b/c my mom thought I had a little pooch and was afraid I'd grow up to have a weight problem, which was prob an overreaction. But, I didn't really miss the desserts and soda b/c we just didn't have them (partly for financial reasons too).

[deborah_r]

Beth, I love your post! Some questions:

The bread. Help me understand this. One problem in our house is DH really hates wheat bread, so I often alternate, because we can't finish two loaves of bread (I hate freezing bread). I was looking at my Oroweat buttermilk bread this morning, and the first ingredient was Unbleached Enriched Wheat Flour (I think). I was expecting white flour. Is it still just as crappy? Does it need to say "whole wheat flour"? I get so confused about this. And it's getting harder because they are saying everything has "whole grains" now - I saw Chocolate Teddy Grahams with "whole grains" the other day.

Can you write up a little recipe/instructions for these smoothies (and how can I make them higher fat for my little peanut)? I love the idea of throwing in a little green veggie, but not sure if I can get it past him! Is that raw veggie, or cooked?

How about a little recipe for chicken salad too? I was just saying the other day that I would love to come up with a great chicken salad recipe, because I love it but only have it at restaurants.

I suck in the kitchen by the way, in case you can't tell.

I think you said you have a picky eater/lower weight child too, so I'd love to pick your brain about it! DS is almost 4, and just barely 28 pounds.

[niccig]

I think this is the answer for ALL parents regardless of child's weight. We need to teach them how to be healthy, which includes what they eat and how much exercise they have.

DH was under 100 lbs when they went to college. He could eat anything and it was mostly all junk. His metabolism slowed down from his late-20's and since then he's struggled with his weight. He never learned healthy eating habits. He's learnt a lot since having cholesterol issues.

Food was always heathly in my house, plenty of whole grains, fruit, vege - everything made from scratch so very little processed. But plates were piled high and you had to clear your plate.

So neither of is learnt healthy eating habits.

[Puddy73]

Not Beth, but wanted to give a suggestion for beefing up your smoothies - add some flax seed oil. Our ped recommends a teaspoon a day for kiddos, so we just mix it into yogurt, oatmeal or smoothies.

Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle 9/08/03 & Finn 10/31/05

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

[brittone2]

nak-
unbleached enriched flour still isn't whole grain. I mean, the fact that they don't bleach it (eta: from the standpoint that the chemicals used to bleach stuff are nasty) is probably better than bleached, but it still isn't the whole grain (as it sounds like you already figured out).

I found this info on flour types that I thought was kind of a funny and concise description:
http://healthsundae.com/blog1/2007/04/01/you-on-a-diet-tip-no-more-enriched-or-bleached-flour/


I think the term 100% whole wheat is kind of an enforceable claim. I remember reading this a few years ago. If it says 100% whole wheat, you can be sure it is whole wheat. Other stuff is kind of a crap shoot..."12 grain", "10 grain" etc. Really, I think the best way to simplify it is look at the first ingredient. You want to see whole wheat flour, etc. as #1. If you see enriched wheat flour, enriched white flour, etc. you know you aren't getting the whole grain.

For smoothies, we just toss in all kinds of stuff, although unfortunately, my DS is not a big smoothie drinker :( I wish he was. He likes them better frozen into popscicles though so that is cool. I usually use yogurt as the base. Just toss a cup or so in there. Add whatever fruit he'll eat. Frozen, fresh, whatever you can get. Banana makes it creamy. Ditto avocado, although it turns the smoothie kinda brownish green (although I've heard people call this a "swamp smoothie" or a "dinosaur smoothie" etc. and their kids will go for it). Avocado and banana together are good and really, the avocado doesn't leave much taste and it makes it creamy, plus it is healthy fat (good for the lower weight kids especially). Frozen bananas are even yummier. You can do strawberries and half a banana, blueberries, strawberries and a banana...whatever you think he'll eat. If you do probiotics you can toss those into the smoothie too. Basically I'd say a cup of yogurt, a half or 3/4 cup of fruit, and enough water, milk, etc. to blend. You can't really mess it up. You can toss in a leaf or two of spinach or raw kale (learned this at MDC...not my own idea). It really gets disguised pretty well. I'd skip the stems of those, just the leafy part. Maybe just skip the green stuff and see if he likes smoothies at all initially.

An awesome thing for kids that are lower weight (IMO) is to toss in some organic coconut milk instead of dairy milk to thin the smoothie (if he likes coconut). It is pretty yummy in a smoothie. Again, from MDC, I can't take the credit. Unrefined coconut has a lot of good fats...very different IMO from refined coconut (we use unrefined virgin coconut oil for cooking and stuff too).

I'm sure you don't suck in the kitchen. I used to totally be the worst cook on earth. I swear. I couldn't flip an egg until I was like 25 ;) Once you kind of learn what flavors/spices go together, it is not that bad.

Chicken salad is a major staple here because I'm lazy LOL. If I change up how I make it, I don't get very tired of it. We cook two chickens in a big roasting pan on sundays, and then I cube and freeze in smaller containers. I pull them out once or twice a week for lunches or dinners. It really really helps. Can you roast a chicken? I just stick two side by side in my huge cast iron roasting pan, and cook at 350ish for an hour or an hour and half depending on how big (use a meat thermometer). I usually cover for most of the time with a piece of parchment paper (since I don't use foil) and then uncover the last 15-20 mins so it will brown a bit.

Anyway, no real recipe, but I take the cubed chicken (using just the white part makes it better IMO but I'm not really picky). Throw it in a bowl. Chop up whatever you want with it. If you add a lot of stuff like apples, etc. the chicken goes a loooooong way too. Here are some things I do:

chopped apples (granny smith is particularly good), raisins, sometimes some walnuts (or not). Add mayo until it is all moistened. A dash of mild curry powder is good IMO. Makes it kind of sweet and savory at the same time w/ the raisins. You get a bunch of food groups in there.

Several places around here make tarragon chicken salad. I love it! I buy fresh tarragon, chop that up (depending on how much you'll like it...start w/ less and add more at the end if you need it). I take grapes and halve them (or quarter if choking is an issue). Mix with enough mayo to moisten. You may need to add more mayo after it "sinks in" to the chicken salad. You can finely chop some almonds to add if you like that texture in your chicken salad. Some people do, some people don't.

I got this idea from a thread at MDC too and I like it in the summer. It makes like a southwestern style chicken salad. Thaw some frozen sweet corn (trader joes has really yummy frozen corn). Open a can of black beans. Toss in some corn and black beans (not a whole can unless you are using a lot of chicken!) with the chicken. In a separate bowl, take mayo and a dab of bbq sauce (trader joes and whole foods carry versions without HFCS, although trader joes is quite spicey). Get the ratio so you can taste the bbq sauce but it isn't overpowering. So it is flavored mayo this way. Combine w/ the chicken, black beans, and corn. A little chopped fresh cilantro is yummy (I LOVE cilantro). Yummy on a whole wheat wrap especially. Nice for mom lunches if you add some lettuce to a wrap, or served over salad greens.

If you or your kidlets like spicey stuff, a little wasabi mixed with mayo and used in chicken salad can be yummy for a change too. I know my DS wouldn't eat it, but I like it that way.

DS is on the lower end of things weight wise. He's just over 3 and 30lbs. He was 27 lbs for like a year straight but finally gained some weight in the past few months.

does that help? I wish I had more specific amounts but I do it by looking at how much chicken I have, etc. so it is tough to be more specific.

[deborah_r]

>does that help? I wish I had more specific amounts but I do it
>by looking at how much chicken I have, etc. so it is tough to
>be more specific.
>


Yes, it does help! Thank you!

(Traci, I'm really sorry to hijack here. I should start a new thread for beefing up scrawny kids who won't eat!)

[sdbc]

We add flax to smoothies, as well (esp since DD is vegetarian). It actually adds a nice flavor. It's $$, though!
Sue, mommy to Aurora (Rory) born 5/13/04

[barbarhow]

ITA-Some kids will be in the 95th %ile just like some will be in the 5th. It helps to sit back and remember that we all come in different shapes and sizes. No matter how much angst we put into it-when children are fed healthy meals in appropriate quantities-they will grow and fill out the way they are meant to. I have angst all the time with my skinny children. Both of mine are in the 5-10th percentil for weight while being in the 50th for height. They are healthy and happy. I cannot force feed them to fulfill how others or I think they should look. Nor should a parent restrict intake of a child who is eating appropriate, nutritious foods just because of his or her own fears that a child will be "fat". As a therapist who treats women with eating disorders-I know this is a sure way to send future patients to my door. (Either restricting or forcing, that is.)
Traci-what about a nutrition consult? You don't seem to be all that motivated to read the books that have been suggested in the past. I wonder if perhaps sitting with a dietician you could begin to understand the repercussions of your food anxieties.
Barbara-mom to Jack 3/27/03, a Red Sox fan
and Anna 5/12/05, my little Yankee fan!

[AmyZ]

I just saw this book advertised in a kid's magazine. I don't have it, but it looks like it might have some good ideas.

http://www.amazon.com/Sneaky-Chef-Strategies-Healthy-Favorite/dp/0762430753/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-0654800-4367904?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1178216300&sr=8-1

It is called "The Sneaky Chef".

Amy Z

Eliana 2/04
Abigail 1/07
http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif[/img][/url]

[Puddy73]

> It's $$, though!

It is pricey, but I'm too lazy to grind up seeds every day. We order from vitacost.com - much cheaper than our local health food store.


Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle 9/08/03 & Finn 10/31/05

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

[kijip]

The other thing to consider is that any flour, 100% whole wheat or not, has less fiber and is less filling than whole grains. We only buy flourless bread for home for the most part (every so often a girl needs her sourdough, LOL) and it has really been great. One half bagel keeps me going all morning. The added fiber really helps. Often you can't get flourless bread at the regular stores, but I see it around more and more.

[miki]

Basic chicken salad with chicken, raisins, apples, mayo, and a dash of curry powder is also a yummy way to mix it up.

[brittone2]

heck yeah!! You are so right :)

We do sprouted grain bread, but I figure that transition is something a lot of people won't like or want to do. Even regular softish whole wheat bread seems weird to me now.

Trader Joe's sells flourless bread I think, right? We do Ezekial and Alvarado St. breads too. DO you do the Alvarado bagels? They are awesome and I think very tasty...even more than the bread :)

ETA: I've seen Ezekial bread at Target (in the freezers) which totally and completely shocked me the first time I encountered it there. Around here it is 3.50+ per loaf, but I figure better to spend on the nutrients in it than the nutrient-devoid stuff that is almost everywhere else. We also don't eat a ton of bread in general (not that many sandwiches, etc.) so the cost isn't really a deterrent for us.

[Momof3Labs]

ITA. We first recommended these books to you years ago, Traci, and they still have good, concrete, common sense advice that you can follow to feel better about Sydney's eating.

[brittone2]

if you know you are going to a very food centered event, where there will likely be a ton of junk available, etc. I'd be inclined to offer some healthy snacks and protein prior to going. Sort of like they tell adults to do around the holidays.

Get a good portion of protein into her if you can (toddler friendly protein: unsweetened yogurt w/ some fruit, a meatball or two, a hard boiled egg-ds loves to use one of those little egg slicer devices on his and will then eat it if he gets to slice it). Maybe some cut up veggies or a piece of fruit along with that if you can.

First, that will leave less room for the less nutritious food. She may be less likely to consume as much junk.

Even if she does consume a bunch of sweets, having the protein in her system will take some of the edge off of things. It will help prevent a massive insulin spike, which can help w/ a kid's mood/behavior, and also make it less likely she'll ride a huge sugar wave leaving her wanting more sugar/carbs shortly after eating the junky stuff. Keeping high protein stuff with you when you go to the park or out and about might be helpful. Toss some cheese cubes, some hard boiled egg, cut up bits of chicken, whatever into a cooler before you go. That way she may be less likely to go after the food she sees at the park, and even if she does eat it, again, you can help avoid a big old insulin spike that might leave her wanting more carbs and sugar a short time later.

[TraciG]

Elaineandmichaelsmommy, I will be careful, I am not going to talk about eating in front of her and I'm not going to weigh her again at home, next time she'll go to the doc will be when she turn's 4 or is sick, thank you for posting

[TraciG]

I did read the book's, maybe I should go to the libray & take them out again.

[ellies mom]

You can buy 100% whole white wheat bread. It is a type of wheat to even though "white" is in the name it is still whole wheat. It has a lighter flavor and texture than regular whole wheat bread. If he is willing to eat the "faux-wheat" breads or anything other than Wonder bread bread, he should give it a try.

[kijip]

We do the Silver Hills bagels. Ezekial bread is also a fave around here.

The flourless bread goes bad quickly, especially the Silver Hills bagels but they are awesome. And the bagels are truly tasty, not grainy dry hockey pucks etc.

Toby is taking at least 2 sandwiches to school per week and we eat toast/egg type things in the morning a fair bit. It is pricey ($3.50-4.00) but we go through a loaf a week and one bag of bagels every two. We keep the bagels in the freezer.

[lisams]

Great post, tons of good info.! I love that website and secretly aspire to make lunches that cute. It's an obsession for me!

[deborah_r]

About the going bad quickly - yeah I found that out buying $4 loaves of bread at Whole Paycheck and finding mold 2 days later. I was so not amused.

I know I should just freeze it, but it's such a pain to thaw it for use and all.

I don't know if I'm ready to switch to flourless bread, but I do like the tips on finding brands that don't have High Fructose Corn Syrup - it is so hard to find any bread without it.

[niccig]

If you're toasting the bread, you don't need to thaw it. If it's presliced, just pull off as many slices as you need and toast it a little longer. If I realise I'm running low, I'll put it in the fridge and it thaws overnight - often I don't remember, but it's OK if I'm just using it for toast in the morning.

[Marisa6826]

Traci-

The last time you posted about this, you mentioned that you were going to get them at the library. I even recall offering to buy them for you. They aren't beach reads. They are reference books. You need to have them on hand if you feel this is such a serious situation in your household.

GO.BUY.THE.BOOKS!!

Think of it this way. For the cost of a couple boxes of ice pops and goodies, you could own the books. Hell, tell your DH that you want them for Mother's Day.

Sydney's (as well as your) mental wellbeing is worth it!!!

-m

[Marisa6826]

Yes, definitely. I'm really surprised that your Ped hasn't referred you to a nutritionist.

She can give you an idea of serving sizes, concepts of what a day's (or week's worth) of nutrients are needed - the idea with toddlers and preschoolers is to get the nutrients in over a period of several days, not necessarily in 24 hours. The nutritionist can also provide you with simple recipes and ideas on meal plans.

I know that some of them will even go grocery shopping with you to show you how to 'read' the boxes, make better food choices, etc.

-m

[brittone2]

I wonder if they are more available on the west coast? I've never seen them. They sound yummy :P

[calebsmama03]

>I have yet to find 100% whole wheat bread w/o HFCS that we can
>afford on a daily basis, which is a bummer.
FYI, Costco has a 100% WW bread, 2 pack for under $4. No HFCS, hydrogenated fats or other nasties, and it tastes pretty good, to boot! Target archer farms has one as well, but ti's more expensive (still less than most others, but I try to get the costco one and stock up - it freezes well :) )

ITA on the ceral - I try to limit that and go for stuff like steel cut oats with plenty of cinnamon, chopped or purreed fruits or even a swirl of agave nectar (like honey or maple syrup but low glycemic index = less insulin spike).

Good luck, Traci! Beth's post had some awesome advice, IMO, and is largely what we do ;)

Mommy to C 3/03
And Miss P 5/05

[brittone2]

we do a big batch of baked oatmeal pretty often. Another mdc recipe, but it is awesome and we eat it all week long. It takes a bit of time, but DH or I usually make it on the weekend and eat it all week. It saves so much time and energy during the week...and I like that you are only cooking one time, and then just reheating, so you really only make a mess one time vs. every morning.

I like steel cut oats too. Yum!!!

Traci-do you think you'd be able to do something like baked oatmeal w/ a recipe? It is kind of like throwing together a cake. Not too difficult. You can change it up by changing what fruits you add to it.

If you did something like that, and hard boiled a few eggs at the same time, you could have breakfast ready made each morning that is relatively low glycemic, has a serving of fruit, and a decent amount of protein. Will Sydney eat a hard boiled egg? I know DS really likes slicing them with one of those egg slicers.

You could cook hardboiled eggs 2x a week, the baked oatmeal 1x a week, and not have to really do anything but reheat the oatmeal each morning and peel the egg for her.

If she won't go for that, I'm sure we can brainstorm some other ideas.

[kijip]

>About the going bad quickly - yeah I found that out buying $4
>loaves of bread at Whole Paycheck and finding mold 2 days
>later. I was so not amused.

Yeah, I hear ya! Our co-op, PCC, which a direct competitor with Whole Foods around here will take the molded bread back and replace it so long as it is just a few days old whrn it molds. I think Whole Foods will do the same.

>I know I should just freeze it, but it's such a pain to thaw
>it for use and all.

We just use the toaster.

>I don't know if I'm ready to switch to flourless bread, but I
>do like the tips on finding brands that don't have High
>Fructose Corn Syrup - it is so hard to find any bread without
>it.

We actually switched to flourless in part because the uber-grainy 100% whole sprouted grain flour bread we were getting has HFCS. The flourless seemed like my only option. However, local bakeries might be a non-HFCS option for you. Orowheat, Sara Lee and many others all have HFCS.

[Marisa6826]

Beth-

What is baked oatmeal? I've never heard of it. Is it like a granola or some sort of breakfast casserole?

Please elaborate!

TIA!

-m

[o_mom]

I'll have to check it out. We don't have a membership, but I go with my neighbor sometimes.

We have been getting the 100% WW at Sam's for about $1/loaf, but it does have some HFCS. Not much, but I would rather not have any. We go through at least 2-3 loaves per week between toast, DH's lunch and kid sandwiches. It will only increase after the baby when I can go back to eating lunchmeat.

Oatmeal is a standby here, too. We haven't done steel cut, but the regular only takes 3 min in the microwave. We add a tiny bit of maple syrup and DS1 gets raisins and pecans in his. On really desperate days I have plain instant - nothing but oats, not the sugared up kind.

[brittone2]

It is a casserole type dish. It ends up sort of cake-like (not the same texture or sweetness as cake). You can slice it up, remove a slice, and reheat.

I'll post the recipe we use just in case anyone wants it. It is really flexible and accommodating. It makes it easy to sub different things and adjust (like, it would work with just 1 c of yogurt if you only had that much left if you upped the amount of water a bit, you can use all different sweeteners, although I've heard using anything significantly less than 1c of sweetener doesn't work well in this recipe)

The night before you make it, or several hours before you want to cook it, take 4-5 c of regular rolled oats, and combine with 1-2 c. of yogurt or kefir and about 2. c warmish water. Stir til moistened. You can leave it out on the counter (can cover with a dish towel). (this helps make the oats more digestable and nutritious by removing the phytates).

When it is time to cook, preheat oven to 350 and then
you take:

1 c. of sweetener of choice (sucanat, honey, maple syrup, rapadura, turbinado sugar, etc. will all work. You can play with using some of each...like a little maple syrup for the flavor combined w/ one of the others). Can use a little less if desired.

3/4 c. of oil of choice (can use some applesauce, even a little canned pumpkin for a partial substitution, which is a good use of that little bit of leftover pumpkin you sometimes have after making a pie or pumpkin muffins...haven't tried fully replacing the oil. I'm sure you could toss in random baby food puree like prunes, etc. too)

4 eggs

1 TB of cinnamon

1 TB of baking powder

2 tsp of vanilla (optional)

Mix this up. Add to oat mixture and stir. Stir in 1-2 c of milk (start w/ lesser amount and add more to get desired texture). You can play around with how you like this. It will be more custardy if you use more milk and cook a little less time, and more cakey if you cook it a little longer with less liquid). Add in 1-2 c of fruit of choice (dried, frozen, fresh, whatever. I've done bananas and added some nuts to the mix, I've done blueberries, I've done raisins with dried apples from some gross organic apple chips from costco that I bought LOL, I've done combos of blueberry and banana. My mom has done cranberry. You can do cherry, strawberry, etc. It is really really flexible and forgiving.

pour into greased 9x13 pan, and bake for around an hour (until set). Again, you can sort of play with the temp and cooking time to alter the consistency/texture.

Serve with milk, cream, maple syrup, butter, plain...whatever you like. Eat it hot, eat it cold. It reheats wonderfully. Great for nursing mamas for a supply boost too LOL. I love making this so DH and DS's breakfast are taken care of several days a week without making 1 or 2 messes each morning (saves DH cooking himself an egg or whatever and leaving grease splatters on my stove ;) )

We really like this and like that you can change what you add to it. It also is kind of flexible in terms of amounts of ingredients if you are running low on something, etc.

[miki]

Thanks for the recipe, Beth. I'm not a big fan of oatmeal even though I know it's good for you but I'll have to try this out just because it sounds so much better than a lumpy bowl of oatmeal.

[lmintzer]

Hi Traci. I can how worried you are, and I'm sure receiving this many responses is both helpful and overwhelming at the same time. Lots to think about, for sure.

I am also not a cook, so I understand first hand how it's not as easy as just saying, "Okay, it's time to makes changes." Big life style changes (such as changing the way a family eats and thinks about food) are huge. It's great that you want to try for Sydney! That's such a good first step. I can imagine it's hard to think about doing alone. That's why, I think, that posters have mentioned either working with a therapist or a nutritionist. So you have someone to help you take it a step at a time.

I think a pediatric nutritionist would be great place to start, since from what you wrote, it seems like you'd like concrete suggestions for how to help with the eating. Your ped can recommend someone. It might feel really good to have a plan on paper and to have someone to check in with about your progress.

[Twoboos]

Beth thanks for posting this recipe, it sounds great! I think this will go over well here.

Just wondering how do you store it? Airtight container? Fridge? Just covered in the pan?

thanks!!

[DrSally]

I also use dried cranberries instead of raisins. And, almonds or grannysmith apples as pp mentioned.

[brittone2]

I bake in a 9x13 pyrex, and once it cools I pop the pyrex lid on it. I keep it in the fridge during the week.

[maestramommy]

Traci I'm sorry you're so stressed over Sydney's eating, and you've gotten great suggestions! I don't mean to hijack, and I know this thread's been up for a while, but someone mentioned Annie's Mac n Cheese in a pp. I've been making that for Dora because it comes in portions, not like the TJ's box, where I feel I have to make the whole box. I guess it's not that healthy huh? Even though I mix frozen spinach in to get her veggies. Does anyone have a healthier recipe or brand for mac n cheese? It's not exactly a staple but I do make it on a semi-regular basis. My only objection to the Annie's was that it's too high in sodium, so I only use enough cheese powder to give the flavor of cheese. Dora doesn't have a weight issue (10th percentile), but I can see that the pasta is probably too processed and I don't know how real the cheese is.

[elliput]

Melinda, my suggestion is to make homemade. A cheese sauce is super easy (basic cream sauce, add cheese) and you can use whatever noodle strikes your fancy.

[miki]

If your kid is not picky about the sauce being super smooth, you can make a small portion of whole grain pasta, drain it, and stir in some shredded cheese with a little cream (or some butter with milk). You need a nice melty cheese. That would be the lazy way to do it. But the sauce won't be as nice as if you separately make a cheesy bechamel. Which is too much trouble for a single servng size, for me anyway.

[mudder17]

Beth, I'm dairy-free at the moment so do you have some suggestions for substitutions? This sounds yummy and pretty easy!


Eileen

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[shilo]

just FYI (sorry, totally off topic) you can freeze bechamel, especially if you don't care if it's not quite as smooth/separates slightly upon reheating - really shouldn't matter as far as making mac n' cheese. even better tho is to just freeze your roux and then just make your bechamel as you need it. bechamel also keeps 4-5 days in the fridger :). i freeze it in ice cube trays so i can just defrost the number of cubes i need at a time. that said tho, sam does get the annies sometimes too. i read lables for sodium all the time, but i guess i too need to be better :). hmm, off to ponder sam's staples again.

hth, lori

[niccig]

I didn't grow up with box mac n cheese (not available in Australia) and I don't like the taste or texture, so I prefer to make my own. I make a big batch, one serving for that night and then a put the rest in mini-loaf size aluminium pans and freeze. When I want to use it, I take it out of the freezer, into the oven at 350F, when it's half cooked - that is thawed but not ready to eat, I stir in chopped spinach or kale and either ham/turkey/coocanadian bacon, sprinkle top with mix of breadcrumbs and parmesan cheese. Back in oven until it's done. It takes longer to bake than mac n cheese on the stovetop or microwave, but it's only one prep. time for 3-4 servings. I love just throwing something in the oven and walking away.

[maestramommy]

Now, how would I make a basic cream sauce? I know nothing about western cooking. And what is a melty cheese? Cheddar?

[Marisa6826]

Awesome! Thanks!

Mia is an oatmeal addict. I think she would swoon over this. :)

Of course, as soon as I deal with the atomic dipes, I might not feel the same way. :P

-m

[Marisa6826]

This recipe from Alton Brown is so ridiculously easy it's almost pathetic (i.e., Jonathan could probably make it and all he usually makes is toast ;) ).

http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/recipes/recipe/0,,FOOD_9936_18423,00.html?rsrc=search

What's great about it is that you can tweak it to use whole wheat pasta, and whatever cheese you want/have around the house. BTW, you know that you can freeze cheese, right? I buy shredded when it's on sale and pop the entire bag in the freezer. Makes life so much easier. :)

-m

[Fairy]

If you don't like curry, try cumin. Really gret that way, too.

[Fairy]

I have a cookbook that I adore called, "Diner." It contains recipes for all the staple "American" comfort foods. Meatload, mashed potatoes (my recipe is better, actually), mac & cheese, split pea soup, lots of stuff. I make their mac & cheese homemade, only I add more cheese than they say. Basically, your cheese sauce is warmed milk, flour, and butter, till it's thickened, then you add cheese. If you're going homemade, you have alot of flexibility in the type of cheese, but Kraft makes a shredded medley of yellow cheese that's basically cheddar and American. Personally, I prefer to use very sharp cheddar, and I add dijon mustard. Anyway, this book is great for "western" American comfort food!

[Fairy]

What a fascinating thread this turned into! Beth, your posts were really kind and helpful. Gave me food for thought for sure. Pun very intended!

[psophia17]

I followed a recipe for a while, and now I make mac 'n cheese without one...

Cheese Sauce:
3tbs butter or oil (I like a combination)
1/2-1 cup chopped onion (optional)
3tbs flour
1/2 tsp mustard (optional)
dash hot sauce (optional)
1.5 cups milk
2-3 cups grated cheese (I prefer sharp cheddar w/ a bit of parmesan)
salt & pepper to taste

Heat the butter or oil in a medium saucepan, add onion if you want, cook until translucent. Whisk in flour. Cook flour for 1-2 minutes, stirring constantly (the pan should seem dry). Add the milk, stirring constantly, in a steady stream. Bring to a boil, and boil one minute. Add mustard, hot sauce, other seasonings if you want, then stir in cheese.

This is enough sauce for 1lb of prepared pasta.

I *love* macaroni and cheese :)

[brittone2]

are you eating soy? I guess you could try soy yogurt and rice/soy milk to moisten?

I've read that egg subs don't work well in this recipe, but I don't know how flexible it is w/ the yogurt. Maybe try a half a batch or something in case it is inedible??

[TraciG]

I'm going to try it, sound's yummy !

[Snugglibumkins]

Wow...you ladies are awesome. This thread is great.

My kids just returned from the doctor last week - my 3 year old and 4 year old have fallen off the bottom of the growth chart for weight. The 19 month old is at 15%. We are healthy eaters - but genetically, we come from tall/skinny people.

I am sooo greatful for all the hints and tips on this thread. We are seeing a pediatric nutritionist as well.

[daisymommy]

Loom for a bread made by "Nature's Own" brand whole wheat bread. The orginal recipe, not the honey version. It has no high-fructose-corn-syrup in it and is the healthiest bread I have seen in the regular grocery store.

[lizajane]

I am sorry your feelings were hurt by some replies. I am sure no one wanted to hurt your feelings, but instead wanted to lift you up to help you continue to lift your daughter up.

my good friend constantly worries about her daughter's voracious appetite and it deeply saddens me. she feds her VERY healthy food, limits her sweets to a very appropriate level, allows her healthy drink options and does a variety of active activities with her. her DD just eats a lot. she is a little kid. she runs around. she likes sweets (so do i!!) she is a beautiful child who is VERY tall, and yes, weighs more than most kids her age. but she is NOT chubby AT ALL. she is just big for her age. being so concerned about her size at age 4 is what concerns me, NOT what she eats. i don't think my friend does anything to hurt her child in the long run (in terms of eating, self image, etc.) but i hope it continues that way. some kids eat more than others. and if you are under a ped's supervision, and you are offering her healthy foods all the time and allowing her to participate in dessert so she doesn't feel excluded or set apart in group settings, i don't know what else you can do. stay active, continue to praise her for non-food related things and try not to worry yourself into a problem. (which ultimately could lead to a self esteem problem.)

and fwiw, my friend whose mother told her she ate too much, ate the wrong things, looked bad in this or that type of clothing was the friend with an eating disorder. and she wasn't overweight.

[mommy111]

Traci,
Just give her healthy food, keep all sugar OUT of the house, that means no fruit juice, no syrup etc, and take her to the park every evening to play. You will be amazed at the difference it will make.
You are a good mama and obviously trying to do everything you can to do the best for your DD. Relax, let her eat healthy, and make sure she gets a ton of physical exercise, it makes all the difference in the world.

[michellep]

I'm getting increasingly alarmed about obesity programs in schools. They seem to be taking your friends worries and insitutionalizing them, and in a school setting it could be even more damaging.

http://junkfoodscience.blogspot.com/2007/04/parents-can-just-say-no.html

[TraciG]

Thanks Mommy111. yep, we are park " regulars " is it ok to give the 100 calories bag's of cookies once a day ? I do cookie's or pretzels or some type of cracker . I don't want to totally ger rid of sweet's . I will start to cut out the OJ , only give it occassionally . Where I live the kid's at the park always have snack's, not always good thing's which is what make's it SO HARD !

[egan284]

Just want to share my little experience with dd when we are out and about. I usually bring her fresh cut fruits when we are out, be it grapes, mangoes, apples, strawberries, etc. I am a big fruit eater myself, so that's the first thing that cross my mind when preparing snack for outings. And dd, being hungry after lots of plays will gobble 'em up.

Have you tried diluted OJ?
DD drinks diluted juice (OJ, apple, etc), and she seems to enjoy it too, although she sometimes asks for 100% juice which I hardly ever give to her.

[miki]

Most cookies, pretzels, and crackers would be empty calories and carbs as Beth mentioned previously. If you want to bring along a dry snack to the park, look at the ingredients for whole wheat and other whole grains. Try bringing fruit like the PP suggested. You can always bring dried fruit if you think fresh fruit is too messy.

I will give my DD her snack at home before we go to the park. I don't like her getting all grubby in the dirt and then switch to eating. I also don't want her running around with food in her mouth and possibly choking. When we're at the park, if she sees other kids with snacks and they are not friends of ours or eating something that I consider junky, I will remind her that she already had her snack and she'll spoil her dinner if she eats more before lunch/dinner. If she makes a fuss, I will take her home where she does not get any more snack nor does she get any more park time. At 3.5 years, she's reasonable enough to quit fussing and just play without trying to beg more food from people.

I think at this age they are old enough for you to to convey the idea that you make the rules for your kid while other parents make the rules for their kids. If there are things you don't want your kid eating at the park, you intervene and tell her she can't have it.

[brittone2]

How about little baggies with a little trail mix you make up at home? You could do several kinds of nuts (I'm assuming she isn't allergic and she's already had them introduced) like walnuts, almonds, peanuts and throw in just a few raisins or similar for some sweetness? That's portable, shelf stable, and you can even leave it in your car or diaper bag so it is always handy. That gives her a mix of protein, healthy fat, the raisins have sugar but at least also have iron, etc. in them.

The cookies, crackers and pretzels IMO (and as the PP) said are still empty calories, all refined carbs, and can set up an insulin spike. If it is something she's used to and will freak about not having them, how about weaning her off? Give her 3/4 of a pack for a while, then 1/2 a pack, and then 1/4 pack, and replace the "missing" portion by offering her something like the trail mix. If she's truly hungry, I think she'll take the alternative to the cookies. If not, I'm sure within a few days she'll get over not having them every day.

[Marisa6826]

Why not make up little baggies of baby carrots, sliced apples, pepper strips, celery, etc. You could also do some sort of granola or dry bran cereal.

Just because those bags are 100 calories, it doesn't mean they're not full of crap like artificial sweeteners, etc.

Traci, you're the one that has to take the reins here. Just because the other kids eat junk, it doesn't mean that Sydney should too. Sooner or later, you're going to need to address peer pressure with her.

With regard to the OJ, be very careful with that. The citric acid in it can really wreck Sydney's teeth. Why not give her water with a splash of OJ in it? Or even better yet, make ice cubes out of OJ, and put those in a sippy of water? The sooner you get her off the 'high octane' juice, the better it will be for everyone.

-m

[brittone2]

Just another thought...if the other moms see you offering healthy snacks, maybe they'll be more likely to seek out healthy snacks for their kids.

Also, not having a daily 100 calorie pack of cookies doesn't mean totally giving up sweets. It isn't depriving her. It is setting her up to seek out healthier options for snacks. If she'll take an alternative snack, why not try to cut back the cookies, crackers, pretzels etc. and offer something healthy instead? Is she *super* attached to the cookies? Even if she is, I'd find a way to start cutting them back so it isn't a daily thing.

It isn't like she needs a daily treat. It sounds like during your special family dinners, etc. there are abundant desserts...she can have it then, or a few other times a week without needing a daily ice pop and or cookie. It isn't deprivation or anything IMO. Maybe you could get her excited about a smoothie frozen into a popscicle as her snack vs. cookies, crackers, etc.

On MDC there are also recipes for sugar free cookies using mashed banana and whole wheat flour. That might work as a transition to getting her off of her cookie packs.

Can you help involve her in cooking/baking/prepping healthier snacks? That seems to sometimes get preschoolers more excited about what they are eating. SHe could help with the sugarless banana cookies, she could help slice up bananas for a snack with a butter knife, etc. I bought DS a little nail scrubber recently and he now scrubs carrots and potatoes for me...maybe she could scrub some carrots and you could cut them into sticks for her. You could tell her how carrots have vitamin A and how that helps her body. Tell her that it helps her eyes to see and her body to fight off colds. It might take much offering to get her excited about it, but involving her in the snack prep might help her get more into it.

[Fairy]

Completely what she said.

[sadie427]

I agree with the general sentiment to offer healthy foods and otherwise not limit her too much. However, I would probably try to transition to having her not expect to eat every time she goes to the park. Playing and eating should be separate activities for the reasons mentioned above; DS has his snack before or after, or if we are out for a long time and we bring a snack he needs to stop playing, wash up and sit down. If he fusses because other kids are running around with snacks, he is given the option of going home and having a snack or continuing to play, and he almost always chooses to play.

[Radosti]

Stroehmanns makes a Whole Grain white breat. That's what I get for DH as a compromise. He's harder to feed than my son. So picky.

[kijip]

Just want to chime in that 100 calories is a lot for child. I seriously doubt Syndey is fat but consider that 100 calories is over 10% of what the average toddler needs in a day and that is a pretty high ratio of junk to real food. Add in a daily ice pop and 1/4 of her calories per day are empty right there. I would give her whole grain breads or produce as snacks rather than packaged cookies.

[KBecks]

I guess I'd make a few suggestions, and I look forward to reading the other replies.

1. Work on a meal schedule, so you're doing 3 meals + 2 snacks a day. Watch the portions that you're offering. And then don't offer food between meals. For beverages, watch what you're giving -- skim milk or water or something light.

Now that I have read the other responses, I wonder about a meal schedule, but I think routine can be helpful. Of course if your daughter is hungry, feed her, but at the same time if she is getting 3 meals + 2 snacks a day, she should be very full and not really have a need for other food. Just watch that you are offering food at regular times.

Secondly, if you start offering healthier stuff, she may refuse some of it and you'll be throwing out what she doesn't eat. Just wanted to offer that that's OK and you will have some food waste. It's sometimes a big PITA, but hang in there and hopefully through experimentation you will find great, nutritious choices that she loves and enjoys. My son is a melon eater -- he loves honeydew, cantaloupe and watermelon and will eat tons of it... which is a bit of a saving grace because sometimes he doesnt' eat hardly anything else. Other fruits run in phases, sometimes he likes apples, sometimes bananas, sometimes oranges/grapes/strawberries, you get the picture. He will eat cucumber and an occasional carrot but otherwise won't tough veggies. I have slacked at not offering veggies because we end up throwing it away, but I need to work on this more and more.
Just giving you a little of our life so you know you are not alone with working on offering good food and dealing with the struggles of feeding.

2. Watch the activity levels. Does your daughter get to play hard frequently? Go to the playground? Try and see what activities she might enjoy participating in -- maybe swimming (or playing at a kiddie pool), or dance class or just running and playing tag. If she hasn't had a lot of activity, she might not enjoy it at first, but keep trying new things and get out there with her and encourage her to play and be active.

Other than that, as long as you are offering healthy things, I wouldn't worry about it.

And in terms of telling her she is pretty and smart, that's OK, but I'd keep those things in moderation. (It would be better to say frequently, I love you, because she is loved no matter what, and you're pretty or you're smart may convey that you love of value her only because she is pretty or because she is smart, when the truth is that she is loved and valued simply because she exists. Not that the phrases "you're pretty" or "you're smart" are taboo, but watch so you're balanced.)

I think a great self-confidence builder is to let her try new things and praise her achievements. I don't know what's age appropriate, but for example, I might let DS help me load the washer or draw a circle and then tell him -- you did it! and thank you for helping me. Little ones like to develop their capabilities and be productive. "I do it!" is a frequent phrase around here.

In terms of your food issues, it may be coming into play. It sounds from the post that you tried to relax about her food, but the weight gain is kind of freaking you out. How does your daughter look? Is she just "solid", or is she starting to look overweight? She might be just perfectly fine, or she could be getting chunky, it's hard to know from what you've written. I think it's good for you to be attentive, but it could be a concern how your feelings are related to her weight. If she is a chubby child, will you feel like a failure? It's something to be aware of and to keep in check. If you are feeling very very emotional about this, then maybe it would be good to explore that further.

Lastly, and maybe above all else, maintain a positive attitude. Be watchful of your behavior so that you are encouraging and positive to your daughter and NOT nagging her or otherwise tearing her down with any of your comments or actions. That doesn't mean you will give into cookie tantrums (do you get those? I am getting cookie tantrums every day from my 2.5 year old). But you will just stay calm and have simple rules and boundaries while still being relaxed and cheerful. If your daughter sees you stressing and obsessing over food or nagging her to be active, etc. etc. she will relate to food and exercise in a similar way.

For the park, try to take snacks that you like her to eat as an alternative to her begging off others. My son begs all the time!

Also, try to experiment and see which healthy foods and snacks she likes best, and repeat her favorites often and then try to slowly build the repitoire while decreasing the not-so-healthy foods.

Hugs and hang in there!
Karen

[KBecks]

I have had the experience of wanting to keep some of my treats away from DS. I think it's fairly normal. On the other hand, maybe it means I should cut back on sodas if I think they're not good for my son, they're not good for me either.

Just wanted to let you know both my husband and I struggle with that too.

[KBecks]

I agree it's a good idea to work that ice pop out of the routine, and change your "desserts" to a SMALL amount of fruit or maybe a SMALL portion of a container of yogurt as that nighttime treat.

You could try to kill dessert altogether, but it sounds like it's an established part of your routine.

I re-read the OP and it sounds like Sydney is about 3.5 and eating three meals and 1 snack per day. It sounds like she is doing great, food-wise. Maybe re-check the portion sizes and see if what she is eating can be made healthier or slightly lower-cal. Also maybe try to give her things that fill her up a little more, maybe more fiber in her diet?

Traci, you said she eats fruit at night, but maybe try it as part of breakfast too, some bananna or apple or melon or berries....

[KBecks]

Is to make baby steps transitions.

We tried and tried to get away from white bread, but were struggling.

Then DH decided we were going to try several varieties of "whole grain" bread (Brownberry) and then we found a couple that we like best out of those.

Now, it's not perhaps the BEST option for bread choice, but I'm sure it's better than where we started.

We have lots of food things to work on here (I should say, areas to improve!)

The smoothies sound like fun. I should get out the blender and make it a permanent fixture on the counter for this summer.

[KBecks]

Good point. This happened to Alek over the last couple months too. If Sydney is going through normal toddler growth, which it sounds like she might be, then it would be a shame to get worked up over it.

Also, I'd go more on how the child looks vs. what the scale says. I hardly ever weigh my 2.5 year old. Last time it was just to keep him occupied while we were at the pedi for his younger brother, and he was 36#, 36" and while he is darn heavy to lift, he looks great. Defintely not skinny, but a strong healthy kid. He probably will not get weighed again until October when he turns 3.

[KBecks]

I agree that bigger jeans for a big healthy kid are a good idea! Obsess over getting cute new summer clothes :) (just kidding -- everything in moderation, even cute clothes.)

[KBecks]

Fat boys will get teased too. Actually, most kids will get teased or picked on at one point or another, whatever their weight.

[KBecks]

I know those 100 calorie packs are so convenient! We bought a bunch at Target the last time we were there.

While I think they are occassionally OK, it would be a good goal to work them out of your routine. What attracts me to juice boxes and 100 calorie packs is the convenient packaging.

What might be better, with a little work, is snack size baggies of grapes.

Bananas are great, convenient pre-packaged snack foods too!

Alek used to eat a whole apple, but now wants them sliced up. But that's really not that hard.

I think the crackers and such are OK in MODERATION. We do a lot of snacks that are not-so-hot, and one of our goals will be to work those back to maybe, every other day or a couple times a week, and replacing them with fruit.

We do raisins, yogurt covered raisins and string cheese sticks. None of those are low-calorie, but they are a little more "natural" to me.

Oh, and maybe we could try to find better crackers, like maybe graham crackers or whole wheat crackers?

It will be a transition.... my son would currently refuse a whole wheat cracker but devour a cheese nip cracker.... You know, I like cheese nips better too.... It's a process, and as I said earlier, it's probably a lot of trial and error and just working to nudge things a little healthier, find some healthy favorites that you can do over and over and over again.

My DS likes popcorn. I should get an air popper and do that more frequently (instead of the easy microwave bags).

[TraciG]

locked for length - please start continuation thread


UGH, I have been worried with her eating & weight gain for as long as I can remember. Maybe a year ago or longer the doc told me to relax, maybe she's eating out of spite, so I did relax & recently I noticed that in a short amount of time her jean's were tight & her belly was sticking out more so I weighed her & couldn't believe it, according to my scale she gained 3lbs in 6 month's, since she turned 3 . I called the doc & he said to bring her in to get weighed because she's not a baby anymore I guess he took me more seriouly this time. So there she weighed even more, 4 lbs in 6 month's. Doc say's she always been a big girl but I have to watch, she is very high up on the chart, maybe 95 % for weight, not sure about height, she is higher then average, so I'm happy about that !!

I am worried, I don't want my child to get older & have a weight problem & get teased in school ! I hated myself in school & was so shy & self concious ! I always tell her she is beautiful & smart so I hope that helps !

It is so hard, I've had the same problem always, I don't know how to handle it. At the park she run's to whoever has food, always has, it is not fun to follow her around & tell the other parent no thank you all the time. Also with family, as most of you know we go out every Friday night, I can deal with ONE night out & dessert at 10:00 at night but sometimes it's more then one night, it is impossible when there is cake out on a coffee table she can reach it !

At the holidsy party in December at her school, they had out dessert on a table & she was the only child not leaving that table, even her teacher said to me she was worried Sydney would get sick. That time I let her go crazy, I thought if I was more easy going this last year that she wouldn't go crazy as much but I was wrong !

Funny some parent's have kid's that don't eat enough & stress I have the opposite & it makes me sad sometimes . She does eat fruit, mostly at night before bedtime.


Just had to vent, any suggestions or opinions are welcome !

[niccig]

You can make popcorn in the microwave w/o easy microwave bags. Take a brown paper lunch bag, give it one spritz of oil spray (I use olive oil spray), put in 1/4 cup popcorn kernels, fold the top of the bag down several times, put in microwave with folded side down, stop microwave once the popping has stopped. Much cheaper than buying bags, and I couln't find any that didn't have transfat or sugar substitute in it. You can then put salt, maybe a little of your own melted butter or one of the popcorn seasonings.

[roysmom]

I just want to offer a BTDT response here. Sort of long, so sorry, but it might help. My grandmother is a VERY large woman. She is probably 150 lbs overweight and has been at least 75 lbs overweight since I was born. My mom is a diet finatic. She gained a lot of weight when she was pregnant with me and it took her about 15 months to lose it. When she finally did, she weighed 88 lbs and was hospitalized for anorexia. She got some treatment, but gave up on it. She has dieted my entire life. I was a chubby young teenager and she constantly worried about me. She never said anything to me, but she would talk to my dad about it and I overheard sometimes. I picked up the dieting habit when I was around 15. It was an obsession. By the time I was 17, I was bulemic and taking OTC diet pills...keep in mind I only weighed about 115 and am 5'5". I hit rock bottom in college when I weighed in at 108. I wore a size 12 in preteen, which I would probably compare to a zero or 1 now. You could count all of my ribs and my hair was falling out. My mom finally got me some help. I went through therapy and have come to terms with my weight. I still have days where I battle the urge to stuff myself or days where I want to starve myself. I am working really hard to not let my DS see this or to express any of my concerns around him. One day, I will tell him if he asks, but I learned the hard way that even when you don't realize it, you are inflicting your problems/diseases on your children. YES, I have an eating disorder and I always will. It comes from years of watching my family go from one extreme end to the other. I am reading that you don't think your child is eating because of you, and that may not be the case, but I too suggest some form of counseling. My DS is only 2 and has already picked up his daddy's bad eating habits. It can happen before we know it. I wish you all of the luck in the world with this.

[JacksMommy]

Wanted to chime in quickly about the "ice pops." I bought popsicle molds at Target and make popsicles out of smoothies combinging silken tofu and fruit. The kids love their "popsicles" and haven't seemed to notice the change.

Laurel
Mama to Jack 6/02 and Maddy 12/04

Babywearing education in Napa, CA

[mommy111]

Traci, what all the rest said :) (and I can see what you mean, I LOVe those 100 cal packs, esp the mini chocolate chip cookies....yummm!) But I think kids already get plenty of sugars from fruit, so artificially concentrated sweet stuff like cookies can be fattening (like one of the posters said, 100 cals is a LOT in kiddie terms). I would personally just keep them for occassional snacks and vary it with fruit/trail mix/carrots. FWIW, my DD thinks broccoli is the coolest snack ever....I love broccoli and would eat a lot of it infront of her so now she thinks its the best treat ever and likes it much better than cookies! Its just a matter of how you pitch it! (I know, i know, we're weird!)
Ady

[TraciG]

Karen, Sydney is solid, she is adorable & I tell her I love her all the time. We are at the park every day after school & sometimes after nap, Sydney loves the swing most though !

Today she ate lunch at the park then had some of a friend's snack, no problem but no more, she had her snack already at school. So she tried to be sneaky, she said to my friend ,I'll put it away for you, or let me see inside, she wouldn't give up, this I do not like, I really didn't want her to have any of the snack but gave in, I wonder if I just said ok you can have one handful right away if she would have acted different .

I have to say, I REALLY thought I was being much more easy going the passed year but maybe you are all right because my mother told me the other day Sydney ate something that my mother gave her & Sydney said mommy wouldn't be happy that I'm eating this , that made me terrified, so maybe after all you all are right, I really didn't realize it, I think she hear's me talking to other parent's or people at the park , she hear's me saying it is enough with the food / snack's, so I will now make a conscious effort not to talk about it again, I am so worried that I made such a mistake, & didn't realize it !!!

[TraciG]

Thanks Laurel, going to buy the molds . What's silken tofu ?

[TraciG]

Today at the park someone has the yogurt covered raisins, Sydney LOVED them & asked why don't I buy them . She loves the string cheese, I'll try it instead of cracker's. I ALWAYS have fruit, brought a small babbie of grapes to the park today, she didn't want it, wanted everyone else's snack as usual !! When we're at a store is when she'll eat the grapes or banana !

[mymomsays]

The cookbook _Moosewood Restaurant Low Fat Favorites_ has a terrific mac & cheese recipe that is easy and very, very good. You don't even have to cook the noodles first!

>Does anyone have a healthier recipe or brand for mac
>n cheese? It's not exactly a staple but I do make it on a
>semi-regular basis. My only objection to the Annie's was that
>it's too high in sodium, so I only use enough cheese powder to
>give the flavor of cheese.

[mymomsays]

The cookbook _Moosewood Restaurant Low Fat Favorites_ has a terrific mac & cheese recipe that is easy and very, very good. You don't even have to cook the noodles first!

>Does anyone have a healthier recipe or brand for mac
>n cheese? It's not exactly a staple but I do make it on a
>semi-regular basis. My only objection to the Annie's was that
>it's too high in sodium, so I only use enough cheese powder to
>give the flavor of cheese.

[niccig]

Silken tofu is a soft tofu, almost custard consistency rather than the firm tofu that you can cut into cubes and use in stir fries etc. You canm use it in smoothies instead of milk/yoghurt.

I just wanted to say that I bought the iceblock molds at Target. I made a smoothie with milk, yoghurt, banana, frozen berries and a couple of handfuls of spinach. DH and I had a glass each and the rest in the molds. DH downed his drink and DS ate every last bite of his iceblock, and I sat back and laughed at all the goodness, esp. the spinach. If it could be a problem, don't let anyone see you put the spinach in. You really really couldn't taste it/see it. They were so good, I'm going to make them for DS's birthday party.

[niccig]

Silken tofu is a soft tofu, almost custard consistency rather than the firm tofu that you can cut into cubes and use in stir fries etc. You canm use it in smoothies instead of milk/yoghurt.

I just wanted to say that I bought the iceblock molds at Target. I made a smoothie with milk, yoghurt, banana, frozen berries and a couple of handfuls of spinach. DH and I had a glass each and the rest in the molds. DH downed his drink and DS ate every last bite of his iceblock, and I sat back and laughed at all the goodness, esp. the spinach. If it could be a problem, don't let anyone see you put the spinach in. You really really couldn't taste it/see it. They were so good, I'm going to make them for DS's birthday party.

[TraciG]

How much yogur tdo you use ? I've made smoothies but with milk only, never yogurt, also is the spinach raw, sorry VERY silly question I'm sure ! ??

[TraciG]

How much yogur tdo you use ? I've made smoothies but with milk only, never yogurt, also is the spinach raw, sorry VERY silly question I'm sure ! ??

[niccig]

I used about 1 cup milk, 1/2 cup yoghurt, 2 bananas (1 would be fine, but I had 2 over ripe bananas), 1 cup mixed frozen berries, 2 handfuls of raw baby spinach. Wizzed it all up, added a little more milk so not so thick, wizzed again, and that was it. Very yummy. I had too much for use and the iceblock molds, so I used an ice cube tray and just mashed those up for DS to eat.

[niccig]

I used about 1 cup milk, 1/2 cup yoghurt, 2 bananas (1 would be fine, but I had 2 over ripe bananas), 1 cup mixed frozen berries, 2 handfuls of raw baby spinach. Wizzed it all up, added a little more milk so not so thick, wizzed again, and that was it. Very yummy. I had too much for use and the iceblock molds, so I used an ice cube tray and just mashed those up for DS to eat.

[MommyAllison]

I have a few thoughts re: the park and begging for other kids snacks. DH and I are much more strict about what DD eats than any of our friends - she is not allowed to eat popcorn, chew gum (!), eat chips, drink soda or drinks containing coffee (!), or juice - ok, she actually only drinks water, limited sweets, etc. We prefer that she eat healthier foods, and so far she is the only kid who enjoys healthy food, out of her peer group.

However, her friends always have these other things that she isn't allowed to eat, and sometimes their parents tell me she can have some if its ok with me. But I feel too strongly about these things to give in - and it makes it easy to say no. I know this may well be a bigger struggle in 2 years when DD is 3.5 years, not 1.5 years...

So my thought is: think about why you do/don't want Sydney to eat other kids' snacks. I think if you have a reason that you really believe in, it makes it much easier to say yes/no.

I hope that made sense. I think parenting would be 100 times easier if we could get a preview each morning of all of the situations we would face that day, so we could figure out our responses ahead of time! :)

Allison
Mama to DD 11/05

[MommyAllison]

I have a few thoughts re: the park and begging for other kids snacks. DH and I are much more strict about what DD eats than any of our friends - she is not allowed to eat popcorn, chew gum (!), eat chips, drink soda or drinks containing coffee (!), or juice - ok, she actually only drinks water, limited sweets, etc. We prefer that she eat healthier foods, and so far she is the only kid who enjoys healthy food, out of her peer group.

However, her friends always have these other things that she isn't allowed to eat, and sometimes their parents tell me she can have some if its ok with me. But I feel too strongly about these things to give in - and it makes it easy to say no. I know this may well be a bigger struggle in 2 years when DD is 3.5 years, not 1.5 years...

So my thought is: think about why you do/don't want Sydney to eat other kids' snacks. I think if you have a reason that you really believe in, it makes it much easier to say yes/no.

I hope that made sense. I think parenting would be 100 times easier if we could get a preview each morning of all of the situations we would face that day, so we could figure out our responses ahead of time! :)

Allison
Mama to DD 11/05

[Momof3Labs]

Yogurt raisins aren't really much better for her than candy - it is really a candy coating, not a yogurt coating, on the raisins. I'd suggest reading that package before making that purchase!

She's old enough to learn that she eats the snacks that YOU bring, not everyone else's snacks (never mind that the other moms probably don't appreciate her eating their kids' snacks) - you just need to let her know that!

[Momof3Labs]

Yogurt raisins aren't really much better for her than candy - it is really a candy coating, not a yogurt coating, on the raisins. I'd suggest reading that package before making that purchase!

She's old enough to learn that she eats the snacks that YOU bring, not everyone else's snacks (never mind that the other moms probably don't appreciate her eating their kids' snacks) - you just need to let her know that!

[miki]

If you're using sweet fruit like bananas, you can even cut out more sugar by not using a flavored yogurt and just use a plain yogurt.

[miki]

If you're using sweet fruit like bananas, you can even cut out more sugar by not using a flavored yogurt and just use a plain yogurt.

[Marisa6826]

Holy cow! Coffee for preschoolers?! Caffeine is the LAST thing my kids need! :) Once in an absolute blue moon, she can have a sip of my iced tea, but even then, she doesn't really like it. Sophie much prefers just the ice cubes in the empty cup. I guess I must be another hardass parent. Absolutely NO gum, no soda, no coffee (!), since we don't drink it anyway. I also severely limit chocolate, etc.

I only recently started allowing juice boxes, but that's just because sippy cups aren't allowed in Sophie's school. At home it's highly diluted juice (only about 15% juice and the rest is water), or milk.

They can have as many apples, bananas, carrots, celery as they want. If they're really jonesing for something with more protein, we make cheese toast on whole wheat bread. They also really like granola bars.

I feel like a sherpa carrying food for them everywhere we go, but better that I have some control over what they consume, than having to become creative on the spur of the moment.

-m

[Marisa6826]

Holy cow! Coffee for preschoolers?! Caffeine is the LAST thing my kids need! :) Once in an absolute blue moon, she can have a sip of my iced tea, but even then, she doesn't really like it. Sophie much prefers just the ice cubes in the empty cup. I guess I must be another hardass parent. Absolutely NO gum, no soda, no coffee (!), since we don't drink it anyway. I also severely limit chocolate, etc.

I only recently started allowing juice boxes, but that's just because sippy cups aren't allowed in Sophie's school. At home it's highly diluted juice (only about 15% juice and the rest is water), or milk.

They can have as many apples, bananas, carrots, celery as they want. If they're really jonesing for something with more protein, we make cheese toast on whole wheat bread. They also really like granola bars.

I feel like a sherpa carrying food for them everywhere we go, but better that I have some control over what they consume, than having to become creative on the spur of the moment.

-m

[scout123]

Could you tell me the MDC website? I've heard it mentioned several times here and always forget to ask for a link.
TIA
Angie

[scout123]

Could you tell me the MDC website? I've heard it mentioned several times here and always forget to ask for a link.
TIA
Angie

[o_mom]

I'll never forget going to breakfast with some friend and the kids (4 and 7) asked if they could get a decaf vanilla latte. :-)

No gum here (DS1 tried it and still can't figure it out), closest thing to soda is a few sips of Gatorade when DS1 sees us have it. No juice as a rule - just OJ about once a week for DS1. The usual snack choices are apple/banana, cheese stick or crackers (Kashi TLC - whole wheat).

I swear the other parents think I'm nuts that they don't live on cereal bars and fruit snacks....

[o_mom]

I'll never forget going to breakfast with some friend and the kids (4 and 7) asked if they could get a decaf vanilla latte. :-)

No gum here (DS1 tried it and still can't figure it out), closest thing to soda is a few sips of Gatorade when DS1 sees us have it. No juice as a rule - just OJ about once a week for DS1. The usual snack choices are apple/banana, cheese stick or crackers (Kashi TLC - whole wheat).

I swear the other parents think I'm nuts that they don't live on cereal bars and fruit snacks....

[Clarity]

Angie,
I'm pretty sure they're referring to the motheringdotcommune at http://www.mothering.com/.
HTH!
ETA - it's okay to to post that link here, isn't it?
Amy

[Clarity]

Angie,
I'm pretty sure they're referring to the motheringdotcommune at http://www.mothering.com/.
HTH!
ETA - it's okay to to post that link here, isn't it?
Amy

[KBecks]

I'm glad that you came here to talk about it. It sounds like Sydney is doing just fine overall and that just working on making some small changes -- like doing more fresh fruit and gradually reducing the frequency of treats, or making those treats a little more nutritious will work out well.

I struggle with a lot of things that have been mentioned here. Neither DH or I are super healthy eaters, and I need to work on reducing my treat intake.

I do think that you have hit on something with what you say about food around your daughter. It's great that you recognize it and will change that. Really, a few treats here and there are not a problem, and you *can* relax as long as *most* of her food is the good stuff.

I'm lucky that my DS isn't old enough to be sneaky yet, but in the case of the friends snack, it's a fine line... you don't want to scold her, and you may even want to let her "get away" with a little of that once in a while. But also, you can also make sure you have something on hand for her -- I think having grapes or an apple with you or some crackers and a nice bottle of water is good. That way you can say that you have a snack for her.

I think your best path will be to have all your food that's available to her be "good" food, and that way she can eat as much as she wants (as others have mentioned). Then neither of you will have to worry so much about her eating or having too much of something "wrong", and when you do have treats, they're special.

I do think that having the good food around is the easy part. I also think that you should focus most of your energy on maintaining a positive, relaxed attitude and outlook, and definitely, don't get too wrapped up in the healthy foods things like tofu popsicles. KWIM? Do those things, but please don't get obsessed over those, either. When I start to think about healthy food, I'll often get wrapped up in worrying about what's the most healthy and miss out on the big picture ;. Your big picture is showing your daughter that eating is OK, and demonstrating healthy habits.

In terms of changing your and Sydney's foods, it will be a lot of experimentation and trial and error. It will be important that if she doesn't like something "healthy", you know it's OK, and you might try it again later, or you'll try something different next time. The main thing is that you are trying different things. When you find something that works, repeat, repeat repeat, and then try some other stuff too. Buy small quantities at first. Also, if you slip and there's an especially treat heavy day, it's OK, it's just one day. The main thing is to keep your cool, stay happy and model a relaxed and happy and healthy attitude, and work at eating healthy together.

Now go share an apple together. :) Have fun!

[KBecks]

I'm glad that you came here to talk about it. It sounds like Sydney is doing just fine overall and that just working on making some small changes -- like doing more fresh fruit and gradually reducing the frequency of treats, or making those treats a little more nutritious will work out well.

I struggle with a lot of things that have been mentioned here. Neither DH or I are super healthy eaters, and I need to work on reducing my treat intake.

I do think that you have hit on something with what you say about food around your daughter. It's great that you recognize it and will change that. Really, a few treats here and there are not a problem, and you *can* relax as long as *most* of her food is the good stuff.

I'm lucky that my DS isn't old enough to be sneaky yet, but in the case of the friends snack, it's a fine line... you don't want to scold her, and you may even want to let her "get away" with a little of that once in a while. But also, you can also make sure you have something on hand for her -- I think having grapes or an apple with you or some crackers and a nice bottle of water is good. That way you can say that you have a snack for her.

I think your best path will be to have all your food that's available to her be "good" food, and that way she can eat as much as she wants (as others have mentioned). Then neither of you will have to worry so much about her eating or having too much of something "wrong", and when you do have treats, they're special.

I do think that having the good food around is the easy part. I also think that you should focus most of your energy on maintaining a positive, relaxed attitude and outlook, and definitely, don't get too wrapped up in the healthy foods things like tofu popsicles. KWIM? Do those things, but please don't get obsessed over those, either. When I start to think about healthy food, I'll often get wrapped up in worrying about what's the most healthy and miss out on the big picture ;. Your big picture is showing your daughter that eating is OK, and demonstrating healthy habits.

In terms of changing your and Sydney's foods, it will be a lot of experimentation and trial and error. It will be important that if she doesn't like something "healthy", you know it's OK, and you might try it again later, or you'll try something different next time. The main thing is that you are trying different things. When you find something that works, repeat, repeat repeat, and then try some other stuff too. Buy small quantities at first. Also, if you slip and there's an especially treat heavy day, it's OK, it's just one day. The main thing is to keep your cool, stay happy and model a relaxed and happy and healthy attitude, and work at eating healthy together.

Now go share an apple together. :) Have fun!

[roysmom]

I am reading how everyone else makes sure that their children are eating healthy, cutting out all of the sweets and candy, etc. I must be the absolute worst parent in the world. DS has 2% chocolate milk eggo waffles and yogurt every morning for breakfast, except on the weekends, he has juice and kool-aid at daycare, for supper we have a very limited range of foods he will eat, the only truly healthy ones are baby carrots, corn on the cob, apples, bananas and grapes. He has fruit snacks or chips at least every other day and has been known to drink a 1/4 of my sundrop!!! He is great weight and height, but I feel like a loser mom that I am not pushing all of the healthy stuff more. He does eat cheese or yogurt every day, sometimes both and I make healthy milk shakes out of sugarfree ice cream, skim milk and fresh strawberries or bananas, but that is only about once a week. My DS must be doomed for poor health later on!!!

[roysmom]

I am reading how everyone else makes sure that their children are eating healthy, cutting out all of the sweets and candy, etc. I must be the absolute worst parent in the world. DS has 2% chocolate milk eggo waffles and yogurt every morning for breakfast, except on the weekends, he has juice and kool-aid at daycare, for supper we have a very limited range of foods he will eat, the only truly healthy ones are baby carrots, corn on the cob, apples, bananas and grapes. He has fruit snacks or chips at least every other day and has been known to drink a 1/4 of my sundrop!!! He is great weight and height, but I feel like a loser mom that I am not pushing all of the healthy stuff more. He does eat cheese or yogurt every day, sometimes both and I make healthy milk shakes out of sugarfree ice cream, skim milk and fresh strawberries or bananas, but that is only about once a week. My DS must be doomed for poor health later on!!!

[Marisa6826]

Hey Girlies-

I'm locking this thread for length. People are complaining that it's taking up too much space on their first page.

Feel free to start a new thread continuing the conversation. This is probably one of the best threads we've had in a long time!

Thanks

-m

[Marisa6826]

Hey Girlies-

I'm locking this thread for length. People are complaining that it's taking up too much space on their first page.

Feel free to start a new thread continuing the conversation. This is probably one of the best threads we've had in a long time!

Thanks

-m