Any Other Horrible Mothers Out There?

[roysmom]

Okay, so I posted on the Sydney eating thread, but it got locked. I must be the most horrible mother out there. I read about all of the mom's that don't let kids watch tv or movies, eat sweets or candy, the children only get fruit and wholesome snacks, etc. My DS does exactly the opposite. Let me list a few:

1. Watches Thomas the Tank Engine nightly(sometimes over and over) although, we are on a Charlotte's Web kick right now.
2. Eats some form of candy every afternoon on the way home from Daycare.
3. Drinks chocolate milk, 2%, and eats an Eggo Waffle and yogurt every weekday morning.
4. Watches movies in the car on the way to/from school.
5. Drinks juice every day, along with kool-aid.
6. Has been known to drink 1/4 of my Sundrop.
7. Only vegetables and fruits he will eat are raw carrots, corn on the cob, apples, bananas, and grapes.
8. Eats hotdogs, yes I said hotdogs, more than once a week. I do give him the turkey ones, hoping to offset the badness.

Now I would like to list a few of the good things I do:

1. Make sure he is bathed daily, not to criticize anyone else, by my DS needs it.
2. Play outside with him every afternoon when we get home. I don't read or anything else, just play with him.
3. Read him books every night before bed.
4. Make sure he eats/drinks enough calcium.
5. Give him a multi-vitamin to offset the bad foods. Maybe not a complete cure, but it has to help.
6. GIVE HIM LOTS OF LOVE AND ENCOURAGEMENT!!!

Someone please tell me that I am not the only mother who does these things. I just don't have the time/energy to force him to eat things he doesn't want. I have tried and he can last a long time. My child is happy, healthy, and well-adjusted, so I can't possibly be all that bad, can I?

[roysmom]

Okay, so I posted on the Sydney eating thread, but it got locked. I must be the most horrible mother out there. I read about all of the mom's that don't let kids watch tv or movies, eat sweets or candy, the children only get fruit and wholesome snacks, etc. My DS does exactly the opposite. Let me list a few:

1. Watches Thomas the Tank Engine nightly(sometimes over and over) although, we are on a Charlotte's Web kick right now.
2. Eats some form of candy every afternoon on the way home from Daycare.
3. Drinks chocolate milk, 2%, and eats an Eggo Waffle and yogurt every weekday morning.
4. Watches movies in the car on the way to/from school.
5. Drinks juice every day, along with kool-aid.
6. Has been known to drink 1/4 of my Sundrop.
7. Only vegetables and fruits he will eat are raw carrots, corn on the cob, apples, bananas, and grapes.
8. Eats hotdogs, yes I said hotdogs, more than once a week. I do give him the turkey ones, hoping to offset the badness.

Now I would like to list a few of the good things I do:

1. Make sure he is bathed daily, not to criticize anyone else, by my DS needs it.
2. Play outside with him every afternoon when we get home. I don't read or anything else, just play with him.
3. Read him books every night before bed.
4. Make sure he eats/drinks enough calcium.
5. Give him a multi-vitamin to offset the bad foods. Maybe not a complete cure, but it has to help.
6. GIVE HIM LOTS OF LOVE AND ENCOURAGEMENT!!!

Someone please tell me that I am not the only mother who does these things. I just don't have the time/energy to force him to eat things he doesn't want. I have tried and he can last a long time. My child is happy, healthy, and well-adjusted, so I can't possibly be all that bad, can I?

[Wife_and_mommy]

LOL. Try not to beat yourself up. We all do the best we know how and can. One mom's hill is another's mountain--comparing only makes you feel inferior/superior.

For your viewing enjoyment( :) ):

--my kids eat pretzels/crackers for snacks; they're not always whole grain either

i'll edit w/ more. i'm ignoring a screaming child to type right now. :P


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[Wife_and_mommy]

LOL. Try not to beat yourself up. We all do the best we know how and can. One mom's hill is another's mountain--comparing only makes you feel inferior/superior.

For your viewing enjoyment( :) ):

--my kids eat pretzels/crackers for snacks; they're not always whole grain either

i'll edit w/ more. i'm ignoring a screaming child to type right now. :P


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I love them most when they are sleeping.--Me
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[luvmypeanut]

I'm with you here. Except my ds eats NO fresh fruit or veggies whatsoever.

But he's growing. Is the happiest child I know. And loves me to bits. I can't ask for more than that.

And from what I have observed, there are no horrible moms on this board.

[luvmypeanut]

I'm with you here. Except my ds eats NO fresh fruit or veggies whatsoever.

But he's growing. Is the happiest child I know. And loves me to bits. I can't ask for more than that.

And from what I have observed, there are no horrible moms on this board.

[Pennylane]

You are not alone, don't worry!Many of the things you listed are on my daily list too. Like the PP said, don't judge yourself by what others do. Everyone raises their children in a different way and who can say one way is better than another.

Plus, what could a little Sundrop hurt :) Isn't that considered a southern vitamin?

Ann

[Pennylane]

You are not alone, don't worry!Many of the things you listed are on my daily list too. Like the PP said, don't judge yourself by what others do. Everyone raises their children in a different way and who can say one way is better than another.

Plus, what could a little Sundrop hurt :) Isn't that considered a southern vitamin?

Ann

[TraciG]

Sounds like you're a very good mother ! Sydney watches Tv before school & after dinner, nobody is perfect !!!

[TraciG]

Sounds like you're a very good mother ! Sydney watches Tv before school & after dinner, nobody is perfect !!!

[crAbbymom]

I'm not going to list my horribleness (is that a word?) but rest assured, you aren't alone! My kids have survived this long, I think they'll be fine!

(Ok, I'll give you one example: Gave dd1 crunchy Cheetos when she was approx. 9 months old. They gave her hives. Oooops!)

[crAbbymom]

I'm not going to list my horribleness (is that a word?) but rest assured, you aren't alone! My kids have survived this long, I think they'll be fine!

(Ok, I'll give you one example: Gave dd1 crunchy Cheetos when she was approx. 9 months old. They gave her hives. Oooops!)

[Tondi G]

ROTFLMAO!

My kids sound like yours!

They eat hotdogs (turkey too but I don't know if they are really THAT much better than beef or weiners)

They eat ice cream, popsicles (that may or may not be fruit based), cake (usually at parties), cookies, candy (lollypops and chocolate... heck my goddaughters mother manages a candy shop for gods sake...... you should see the bags of chocolate covered honeycomb and english toffee and caramel apples she shows up with) YUM

I try to limit the juice but my mom is notorious for giving it to them.... and they see her almost every day! SHe's gotten better about it though and waters it down and puts it over ice now! My little guy gets much less than my 1st born did... hmm wonder why he's the chubby one!

We have a DVD player in the car and they are usually watching... little einsteins, bob the builder or scooby doo. They love it and it keeps them happy and not screaming in my ear! They also watch tv at home..... we play outside as much as we can but the sun goes down and mommy needs some time to get dinner preparred without a 2 year old screaming and attempting to climb the baby gate that is keeping him out of the kitchen!

They take vitamins. they drink milk (sure sometimes it's chocolate). They are HAPPY and Healthy. They are smart and inquisative. We read everynight. they have nightly baths usually. They go to bed too late sure but they wake up later than most kids we know (we don't do 5:30- 6:30 wake ups in this house) so I think they are getting enough sleep! They have tons of love and encouragement and are growing up to be wonderful young boys!!!!

I think you're doing just fine! You could be doing a whole lot worse!!!! Not all kids are raised the same and we all manage to grow up and thrive!

~Tondi
Mommy to Mason 7/8/01 and Aidan 5/4/05

[Tondi G]

ROTFLMAO!

My kids sound like yours!

They eat hotdogs (turkey too but I don't know if they are really THAT much better than beef or weiners)

They eat ice cream, popsicles (that may or may not be fruit based), cake (usually at parties), cookies, candy (lollypops and chocolate... heck my goddaughters mother manages a candy shop for gods sake...... you should see the bags of chocolate covered honeycomb and english toffee and caramel apples she shows up with) YUM

I try to limit the juice but my mom is notorious for giving it to them.... and they see her almost every day! SHe's gotten better about it though and waters it down and puts it over ice now! My little guy gets much less than my 1st born did... hmm wonder why he's the chubby one!

We have a DVD player in the car and they are usually watching... little einsteins, bob the builder or scooby doo. They love it and it keeps them happy and not screaming in my ear! They also watch tv at home..... we play outside as much as we can but the sun goes down and mommy needs some time to get dinner preparred without a 2 year old screaming and attempting to climb the baby gate that is keeping him out of the kitchen!

They take vitamins. they drink milk (sure sometimes it's chocolate). They are HAPPY and Healthy. They are smart and inquisative. We read everynight. they have nightly baths usually. They go to bed too late sure but they wake up later than most kids we know (we don't do 5:30- 6:30 wake ups in this house) so I think they are getting enough sleep! They have tons of love and encouragement and are growing up to be wonderful young boys!!!!

I think you're doing just fine! You could be doing a whole lot worse!!!! Not all kids are raised the same and we all manage to grow up and thrive!

~Tondi
Mommy to Mason 7/8/01 and Aidan 5/4/05

[momathome]

I ditto pretty much everything you said. :) We are not making homeade oatmeal here or mac and chees from scratch - Annie Shells is a big hit. My 2 year-old had a hot dog for dinner tonight - she's still alive and pretty thin. They eat things with sugar, they drink a limited amount of juice, we do normal pasta, not whole wheat, tofu has never crossed their lips, McDonald's Happy Meals make everyone happy (I do substitute apple slices for fries and just get milk). My 9 year-old is allowed to have one soda a week. You know what? No one is dying over here, they are all very healthy girls on the thin side who are active and happy and growing. :) They also all watch more than their share of TV (Julia is obsessed with Dora - I keep the dvd's on rotation). They also take dance classes, play soccer, play basketball, and play outside for hours every day when the weather is nice.

Great parenting comes in all forms, not just earthy-crunchy stuff. ;)

[momathome]

I ditto pretty much everything you said. :) We are not making homeade oatmeal here or mac and chees from scratch - Annie Shells is a big hit. My 2 year-old had a hot dog for dinner tonight - she's still alive and pretty thin. They eat things with sugar, they drink a limited amount of juice, we do normal pasta, not whole wheat, tofu has never crossed their lips, McDonald's Happy Meals make everyone happy (I do substitute apple slices for fries and just get milk). My 9 year-old is allowed to have one soda a week. You know what? No one is dying over here, they are all very healthy girls on the thin side who are active and happy and growing. :) They also all watch more than their share of TV (Julia is obsessed with Dora - I keep the dvd's on rotation). They also take dance classes, play soccer, play basketball, and play outside for hours every day when the weather is nice.

Great parenting comes in all forms, not just earthy-crunchy stuff. ;)

[KBecks]

I don't think you are horrible. You are making choices that work for you.

I make some similar choices, but I'm not about to advertise my "sins" here. I am happy with most of my choices and some things I want to work on.

This community is wonderful if you want suggestions and ideas for eating or doing things in new ways, so use it as a resource when and if you want it.

[KBecks]

I don't think you are horrible. You are making choices that work for you.

I make some similar choices, but I'm not about to advertise my "sins" here. I am happy with most of my choices and some things I want to work on.

This community is wonderful if you want suggestions and ideas for eating or doing things in new ways, so use it as a resource when and if you want it.

[kijip]

Hey, in my house flourless whole grains go hand in hand with cookies, hotdogs and lemonade. :P And I have never had anyone, in any seriousness think I was a bad mother. We all do what we have to do, ya know? Everyone has different priorities and lifestyles that are no better or worse than the next.

[kijip]

Hey, in my house flourless whole grains go hand in hand with cookies, hotdogs and lemonade. :P And I have never had anyone, in any seriousness think I was a bad mother. We all do what we have to do, ya know? Everyone has different priorities and lifestyles that are no better or worse than the next.

[psophia17]

What's a sundrop, and where can I get one?

I'm a horrible mother, too, but MIL, she's a horrible horrible horrible grandmother :P

[psophia17]

What's a sundrop, and where can I get one?

I'm a horrible mother, too, but MIL, she's a horrible horrible horrible grandmother :P

[niccig]

My house is the same balance. I do whatever works that day. Last night's dinner was grilled cheese sandwiches and one yoghurt pop mentioned in that thread - I made them a few days ago. I was tired, it was easy to get on the table. Tonight I have a little more time, so maybe some fish and veges and strawberries. No guilt here.

[niccig]

My house is the same balance. I do whatever works that day. Last night's dinner was grilled cheese sandwiches and one yoghurt pop mentioned in that thread - I made them a few days ago. I was tired, it was easy to get on the table. Tonight I have a little more time, so maybe some fish and veges and strawberries. No guilt here.

[lizajane]

i yelled at my kid today for whining and crying JUST before i realized he had PUKED all over himself and that is why he was crying.

NIIIIIIIIIIIce.

so i really, truly, honestly think that *I* deserve the trophy today and will be rather upset if you all don't let me have it.

[lizajane]

i yelled at my kid today for whining and crying JUST before i realized he had PUKED all over himself and that is why he was crying.

NIIIIIIIIIIIce.

so i really, truly, honestly think that *I* deserve the trophy today and will be rather upset if you all don't let me have it.

[californiagirl]

Nobody here is a horrible mother. I'm not a horrible mother because I microwave things in plastic and give my kid some of my gingerale. You're not a horrible mother because your kid watches TV. There are horrible mothers in this world, but not many.

Seriously, I need a break. I need a break from lots of things, but I especially need a break from anybody that believes that loving mothers who care for their children the best they can are horrible because they don't comply with some random rule. I need a break from a world where we all get judged so often that we hear judgment in every statement people make about their own choices. I saw somebody elsewhere apologizing because her kid sometimes wore clothes inside the house that weren't ironed! What kind of world do we live in where you could possibly think this was important? I aim for clean and shrug if I don't get there. I don't aim for ironed. If we're at home, I don't even aim for clothed! And honestly, I don't care if you keep your children dressed in ironed starched white pinafores at home as long as you don't feel the need to apologize for your parenting if they get mussed!

It's quite possible that this mother is a horrible mother: http://bluebirdsclassroom.blogspot.com/2007/04/children-are-not-accessories-or-tale-of.html
but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt as she seems to have done a bit better than the father, who is definitely horrible. You and me and the mother whose kid knocks something over in Starbucks after drinking a big, sugary coffee drink which I sincerely hope is decaf? We're just gettin' through the day as best we can, and we're basically OK, even if we struggle.

[californiagirl]

Nobody here is a horrible mother. I'm not a horrible mother because I microwave things in plastic and give my kid some of my gingerale. You're not a horrible mother because your kid watches TV. There are horrible mothers in this world, but not many.

Seriously, I need a break. I need a break from lots of things, but I especially need a break from anybody that believes that loving mothers who care for their children the best they can are horrible because they don't comply with some random rule. I need a break from a world where we all get judged so often that we hear judgment in every statement people make about their own choices. I saw somebody elsewhere apologizing because her kid sometimes wore clothes inside the house that weren't ironed! What kind of world do we live in where you could possibly think this was important? I aim for clean and shrug if I don't get there. I don't aim for ironed. If we're at home, I don't even aim for clothed! And honestly, I don't care if you keep your children dressed in ironed starched white pinafores at home as long as you don't feel the need to apologize for your parenting if they get mussed!

It's quite possible that this mother is a horrible mother: http://bluebirdsclassroom.blogspot.com/2007/04/children-are-not-accessories-or-tale-of.html
but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt as she seems to have done a bit better than the father, who is definitely horrible. You and me and the mother whose kid knocks something over in Starbucks after drinking a big, sugary coffee drink which I sincerely hope is decaf? We're just gettin' through the day as best we can, and we're basically OK, even if we struggle.

[mudder17]

Don't feel too bad. DH yelled at Kaya for whining about her tummy hurting on our way to a friend's house for dinner just before she puked all over everything.

As everyone else said, we all have our mountains and hills and we do what we can on any given day at any given moment.


Eileen

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[mudder17]

Don't feel too bad. DH yelled at Kaya for whining about her tummy hurting on our way to a friend's house for dinner just before she puked all over everything.

As everyone else said, we all have our mountains and hills and we do what we can on any given day at any given moment.


Eileen

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[katiesmommy]

I was curious too. So I went looking this is what I found on wikipedia:

"Sun Drop is a citrus-flavored soda produced by Cadbury-Schweppes. Like other citrus sodas, it has a yellowish-green color imparted by Yellow 5 and Yellow 6. It has a sharper taste than Pepsi's Mountain Dew or Coca-Cola's Mello Yello, and is known for its high caffeine (63mg per 12oz can) and sugar content. Orange juice is an ingredient to the drink, and remaining pulp matter from the orange juice provide some of the soft drink's unique taste and appearance. A diet variety was introduced in 1985.

Sun Drop was developed in St. Louis, Missouri in 1954 by soft-drink salesman Charles Lazier, at around the same time as other citrus sodas such as Ski and Mountain Dew.[1] In the 1950s and 1960s Sundrop was sometimes produced under names such as "Sun Drop Golden Cola" or "Golden Girl Cola". The brand was acquired and standardized by Crush International in 1970, itself purchased by Procter & Gamble in 1980, which sold its soft-drinks holdings to Cadbury Schweppes plc in 1989.

While extraordinarily popular in the Carolinas, the Jackson Purchase area of western Kentucky, south-central Wisconsin, the Tennessee Valley and the Rolla, Missouri, area, Sun Drop remains relatively unknown in most of the United States. Like other regional drinks with a cult following such as Cheerwine, fans outside bottling areas have been known to pay large amounts to have the drink shipped to them. [2]

There are five varieties of the drink available for sale: Sun Drop (green can), Diet Sun Drop (white can, 69mg caffeine), Caffeine Free Sun Drop (gold can), Cherry Lemon Sun Drop (red can), and Caffeine Free Diet Sun Drop (gold/white can).

In the 1980s and early 1990s, the drink was promoted in the South by NASCAR Winston Cup driver Dale Earnhardt"

HTH

[katiesmommy]

I was curious too. So I went looking this is what I found on wikipedia:

"Sun Drop is a citrus-flavored soda produced by Cadbury-Schweppes. Like other citrus sodas, it has a yellowish-green color imparted by Yellow 5 and Yellow 6. It has a sharper taste than Pepsi's Mountain Dew or Coca-Cola's Mello Yello, and is known for its high caffeine (63mg per 12oz can) and sugar content. Orange juice is an ingredient to the drink, and remaining pulp matter from the orange juice provide some of the soft drink's unique taste and appearance. A diet variety was introduced in 1985.

Sun Drop was developed in St. Louis, Missouri in 1954 by soft-drink salesman Charles Lazier, at around the same time as other citrus sodas such as Ski and Mountain Dew.[1] In the 1950s and 1960s Sundrop was sometimes produced under names such as "Sun Drop Golden Cola" or "Golden Girl Cola". The brand was acquired and standardized by Crush International in 1970, itself purchased by Procter & Gamble in 1980, which sold its soft-drinks holdings to Cadbury Schweppes plc in 1989.

While extraordinarily popular in the Carolinas, the Jackson Purchase area of western Kentucky, south-central Wisconsin, the Tennessee Valley and the Rolla, Missouri, area, Sun Drop remains relatively unknown in most of the United States. Like other regional drinks with a cult following such as Cheerwine, fans outside bottling areas have been known to pay large amounts to have the drink shipped to them. [2]

There are five varieties of the drink available for sale: Sun Drop (green can), Diet Sun Drop (white can, 69mg caffeine), Caffeine Free Sun Drop (gold can), Cherry Lemon Sun Drop (red can), and Caffeine Free Diet Sun Drop (gold/white can).

In the 1980s and early 1990s, the drink was promoted in the South by NASCAR Winston Cup driver Dale Earnhardt"

HTH

[psophia17]

Shoot - I was hoping it was more of a lemondrop kind of thing... :9

[maestramommy]

What a refreshing thread! If anyone wants reassurance that none of us are horrible mothers, and why we always seem to think we are, go and get "The Mommy Myth." I just finished it, and it's great! It's a historical perspective on Momism, from a political, cultural, and marketing standpoint, and how it has all combined to prey on our angst, fears, and guilt as mothers. It is VERY funny in its tone, and takes a "rise up and say 'Bpppptttt!'" If you don't have time to read the whole thing, just concentrate on the last couple of chapters, and DON'T miss epilogue. I was ROTFL while reading it.

BTW, this is NOT a mommy wars book. In fact it decries the mommy wars.

ETA: And Dora eats a lot of chicken nuggets and fish sticks. They're quick, she likes them, and fulfill the protein requirement.

[alleyoop]

Reminds me of Orangina. Ohhh, I love that stuff!

[elephantmeg]

I agree. I may not "live up" to some of the parents here who are wonderful role models, guidance and support for me, but I certainly do the basics and more. I'm not entering a parenting competition, my son is fed, clothed, loved, played with and secure. He gets regular medical care, vitamins, healthy foods, treats in moderation and hot dogs (and no not the turkey ones either!). We eat white bread and sweets. I work every day with kids whose basic needs aren't met. We are good mothers who love our children. Enough said!

[Pennylane]

It's like a Mello Yello only better!

Ann

[Corie]

You are a fantastic mother!! My house is pretty much the same way!!

I started reading the thread posted about Sydney's eating habits and
after reading about a quarter of the way down, I just closed it.

[sidmand]

Thank you for posting this. I don't do A LOT of what I see on these boards.

I don't cook...pretty much ever. I was thrilled that DS started eating yogurt at all, even if it is the sugary one. To me, not getting the kids' version was health food! I think he pretty much only ever gets processed foods. I try to make them the healthier ones, but heck, they are processed. Pretty much everything I cook is out of box and/or can be microwaved or doesn't need any cooking!

There are things I care about and things that aren't as important to me that I know are very important to many...you pick and choose your own beliefs and battles.

I try to make an effort on things, but I have plenty of non-organic food, plastic toys and cups, processed food, and junk food. We've seen many many episodes of the Backyardigans many many times...but I think I'm doing an okay job, but nothing is overall as important as what you said...having a happy, healthy, and well-adjusted child

Like many of the PPs said, I don't think ANYONE on these boards is a horrible mother. We all have our not-so-great days, but the fact that we know that makes actually makes us not a horrible mother. We wouldn't be on these boards at all if we truly were because we wouldn't care. I thinking caring is at least half the battle!

Debbie
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[crayonblue]

I am a total believer in everything in moderation. (Well, not everything but most everything.)

I grew up in a total health food, no TV, homeschooled, rather extreme home. I am far more comfortable with a bit of junk food, a little TV, school and far more moderate home.

#6 on your list of things you do is the most important thing you can do for a child. :)

[LarsMal]

Absolutely NOT a horrible mother. A horrible mother is the woman who just got sentenced to life for starving her six week old to death by giving him only soymilk and apple juice. Loving and caring for your child the best way you can makes you a GREAT mother!

DS eats chicken nuggets more than once a week, and when we're out to dinner either DH or I will order something with fries so we can keep DS occupied and happy while we eat. We all do what we have to do :-)

I *wish* DS would watch some TV!

[randomkid]

Mmmmmm...chocolate covered honeycomb - never heard of it - sounds interesting and yummy! :9

[chlobo]

It makes me sad that we, as mother's, inevitably judge ourselves based on the parenting decisions of other people. When, in reality, we're all doing the best we can. And I agree that no one here is a bad parent. Our kids are all well fed, loved, clothed, etc. Bad parents are ones who ignore their children and don't take care of their basic needs or even spend time with them.

I have to say I'm guilty of the comparison trap too. I'm always thinking "so and so does this with their kid, maybe I should do more". In reality, I'm doing what I can and she seems like a pretty happy kid.

[brittone2]

awesome post :) and I love the "I am for clean and shrug if I don't get there. I don't aim for ironed." What a quote :)

[brittone2]

You aren't a horrible mother, and no one on this board is a horrible mother.

I don't think you can compare how your household runs to how someone else handles things. Honestly. Each of us has different priorities and hot button issues. Are you happy so far with the little person your child is growing into? It sounds like you are! In that case, I think you are parenting your child the best way possible for your own family.

In the Sydney thread, the OP was asking for advice on nutrition, etc. (at least that's what it seemed like to me). So yes, that's going to elicit suggestions for healthy snacks/meals, etc. It doesn't mean you are obligated to do those things to join the "good mom club" or anything like that ;)

We place a lot of value on healthy diet, no TV, etc. but that doesn't mean I think that parents that allow that stuff aren't good parents. They probably do lots of things better or differently than I do. They probably have other issues that are more important to them, and that's great.

[roysmom]

The South was reared on Sundrop. For DH, it's Mountain Dew. I have an aunt that will come home and load her trunk up with Sundrop, because she can not get it where she lives! Imagine that, I think that should be against the law!!!!

[KBecks]

"I especially need a break from anybody that believes that loving mothers who care for their children the best they can are horrible because they don't comply with some random rule. I need a break from a world where we all get judged so often that we hear judgment in every statement people make about their own choices."

---------
Very well said!

[roysmom]

OOOOOOHHHHH, I can't imagine not knowing what a Sundrop is. It is a soda, not sure which company makes it, but I am pretty sure you can only find it in the south. It is soooooo good! It has an insane amount of caffeine, but not like the Red Bull drinks or anything of that sort. More along the lines of Mt. Dew. If you ever get around the south, try to find one. I love them, but DH won't touch them. Go figure.

[roysmom]

See, I feel so much better now. Sundrop has orange juice. That can count for one of my fruits! LOL

[firstbaby]

Okay, that made me absolutely laugh out loud! I am sorry your son is sick. Hope he feels better soon :)

[roysmom]

I just wanted to say thank you to all the pp out there. I was LMAO at some of the stuff I read. It is very refreshing to know that I am not the only one out there who does some of this stuff. I really don't think I am a bad mother, but sometimes I do feel very guilty for not worrying more about the things DS eats and the fact that he loves TV. What makes me feel okay is that his ped. says he is perfect weight and height proportion and he would rather be outside playing anytime over watching TV. I just want to make sure he doesn't turn into a couch potato. I agree, that a mother that does her best, loves and encourages her child, and puts them first, is a great mom!!! BTW, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL OF US GREAT MOMS OUT THERE!!!!

PS, DS can say his entire prayers by himself, word for word!!!!

[hudsonam]

Well, I had to google Sundrop, because I'd never heard of it. ;) You're not a horrible mother. I am somewhere in the middle. DS gets candy every so often, he gets juice (watered down), he gets pancakes and waffles (we try to buy organic/and or otherwise healthier options if we can), and my parents take him to McDonald's at least once a month. Oh, and when we go out, he can eat all the fries he wants if he'll allow us to finish eating. ;) We actually try not to get fries, because that's all he'll end up eating, but if he gets them, oh well.

I don't think I'd let DS drink soda, or candy every single day, but he watches TV, and eats hot dogs (usually turkey), and many other things I'm sure aren't totally great. You're not a horrible mother!

[Puddy73]

Honey, you are not a horrible mom! #6 on your list trumps everything else. Since we are baring our souls, I'll admit that both my kids drink coffee. Yes, even my son who is 18 months old. "Ca-ca" was an early word for both of them, and our local coffee house serves an "Annabelle Latte" (named for DD) that is steamed milk with a little shot of coffee. They also eat at McDonalds and play with plastic toys. I know its hard not to beat yourself up over every little thing because I struggle with that, too. Just try to focus on the big picture and enjoy your kiddo!

Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle 9/08/03 & Finn 10/31/05

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

[coachkath]

DD has just woken up and b/c I'm not running in to get her I feel like a horrible mommy. In fact, everytime I'm on the phone or email I feel like a horrible mommy.
I got one of those "What did you do all day?" questions from DH a few weeks ago. I refused to answer on the grounds that I'm his wife, not the maid. (He somehow manages to get things done when he's home with DD, but I don't). I finally emailed him the next day and said "I took care of DD, played with her, fed her and made sure she was happy. The rest just doesn't matter." Even though he gave her blue gatorade and couldn't figure out why she puked the other day. (DH: "THere's SUGAR in that????") I almost posted about my guilt when I gave her McD's a few weeks ago. And she eats Thomas' English Muffins (Gasp...WHITE Bread). And sometimes waffles. And I was also going to ask about Sundrop. I wish I had some...Sounds kinda good.
Kelly's mama

[roysmom]

Don't you just love the "What did you do all day?" My DH never says that to me because I work out of the home, but I have had other people say it to me and I want to say what business is it of yours? I am lucky, we have a lady clean our house every other week, but I still have laundry, ironing, straightening up and various other things to do and sometimes, they just don't get done. I feel guilty for about 5 minutes, then I think DS is only young 1 time and the other stuff can wait. Weekends are our time. I try to get the other done while he naps, but sometimes I just watch 2 solid hours of uninterrupted TV, the stuff I want to watch. So honey, no, you are not a bad mommy. The house and anything else will still be there tomorrow, next week, or even next year, but, DD will be grown before you know it.

[californiagirl]

The US needs to import the babycino from Australia. A babycino is milk, with foam on top, served in a espresso cup with a ceremonial sprinkle of cocoa on top and usually a marshmallow or a cookie on the side. At many coffee shops it is free, at others it is fifty cents or even a dollar if the cookie is a good one and it's in a bigger cup. It looks satisfyingly like a "real" drink.

It probably wouldn't satisfy a kid who actually liked the taste of coffee, but otherwise, it's a marvelous invention.

[brownlesa]

>I don't cook...pretty much ever. I was thrilled that DS
>started eating yogurt at all, even if it is the sugary one. To
>me, not getting the kids' version was health food! I think he
>pretty much only ever gets processed foods. I try to make them
>the healthier ones, but heck, they are processed. Pretty much
>everything I cook is out of box and/or can be microwaved or
>doesn't need any cooking!


LOL!! ITA!! The only thing I've ever made from scratch is a scrambled egg.

Leslie
DD 9/13/05

[niccig]

My MIL says she regrets the clean house and dinner on the table when FIL came home attitude. She says she missed a lot of what her kids do. I'm going to remind her of that when she arrives tonight and she sees the house/garage...

[Tondi G]

Oooh you have got to try it! SOOOO GOOOOD! They do it dipped in milk chocolate and dark chocolate. I can't decide which I like more. she always brings us some of each! LOL This is where it comes from and they DO SHIP!!!!

http://www.farmersmarketla.com/directory/vendor/littlejohns/index.html

~Tondi

[DDowning]

Last week, 3 kids (5, 4 and 2) from my neighborhood were tragically killed when the mini-van they were riding in was plowed by an 18 wheeler big rig that didn't stop in time. The mom and grandmother were in the front driver and passenger seat survived but her family was wiped out. The whole community is just reeling right now with shock.

This is not meant to be a downer post but it really put things in perspective for me. Suddenly a clean, orderly, perfect upbringing household doesn't sound as important to me anymore.

[Corie]

Kathy,

My husband is the exact same way!! He always asks me "What did you do all
day?" Actually, he means to say one of the following-

*Why isn't the house dusted?
*Why didn't you vacuum?
*Why are we having Skillet Sensations again for dinner?

etc., etc.


And, I tell him that I hated housekeeping before I had kids and I still hate it now.

My kids are happy and we have fun playing all day and that's all that matters
to me!! :)

P.S. I have noticed that the more sex we have, the less he bitches about the
house being clean. :) Maybe try that??? :)

[Puddy73]

That is a great idea! Of course, Starbucks would probably charge $1.99 for the same thing!

Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle 9/08/03 & Finn 10/31/05

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

[Ceepa]

>
>P.S. I have noticed that the more sex we have, the less he
>bitches about the
>house being clean. :) Maybe try that??? :)

So. True.

Bwahahahaha

-Ceepa

[coachkath]

LOL!!! I can try that. However, I also try to tell him that when he says those kinds of things it's not exactly foreplay or a turn-on for me. He just doesn't get that what he says now will affect how I feel about him later. When you come to me in bed that night I'll STILL be thinking about the comment you made.

What's really scary is that when he comes home and the house is clean and there's a nice dinner waiting it IS a turn on for him.

He's so freakin anal. I can't remember the last fight we had, because it was about something so completely and utterly stupid (one of many fights we have like that), that in the middle of it I said "No one else in this world would have a fight about this" I'm talking about something like where to place the dish-soap dispenser. It HAS to be where he wants it (inches away from where I want it). He has a so-called logical reason behind it all.
He's an engineer.
If you know any engineers, maybe you can see my point.
Kathy - I still love my DH but we drive each other crazy
Kelly's Mama

[writermama]

in some past thread on this board, probably in response to some overwhelmed new mom or mom-to-be, someone gave the sage advice that has stuck with me (paraphrasing):

Pick 3 things to worry about --nutrition, clothing, toys, tv, scheduling, foreign language, or whatever -- pick 3 things and let the rest go.

some days, pick 2, or 1.

And this from the book Baby Minds, "Love comes first."

Life is short, childhood even shorter, babyhood is the blink of an eye. Do the best on any given day with the information and resources you have -- some days if you can just stay awake, you're ahead of the game. This too shall pass.

[mommy111]

Is your child happy? Do you love him? Then you are a role model for any mom and one of the best mommies out there. (at least that's how I reassure myself on my why-did-i-get-out-of-bed-today days :) )

[katiesmommy]

Apparently you can also order them online if you don't live in the area they are sold in. HometownFavorites has them, along with all kinds of other things, ie, mallomars, and vallo milks. Foods, candies, and drinks.

http://www.hometownfavorites.com/shop/candy_cat.asp?c=21&p=3

[kusumat]

What you did are nothing compare to the woman I saw at the outdoor mall today. She SMOKED when her DC was sitting in the FRONT of her in the stroller. I felt so sorry for her kid who had no choice or ability to get away form the toxic smoke. I HATE HATE smoking and smokers.

I feel so lucky that none of my family members, friends are one of them.