Should I leave my OB?

[infomama]

I am 32 weeks with DD #2 and am very unhappy with my OB. I had severe femoral nerve compression during the birth of my daughter which left me paralyzed in my left leg for months. I eventually recovered fully however DD#2 will arrive via C-section in an attempt to avoid the possibility of another nerve injury or worse, severing my femoral nerve.

My old OB just retired. He was an amazing high risk doc with tons of experience. I was completely confident with him. I have since signed on with another doc in the practice and although she seems like a nice person, she is very very laid back.....to the point where I am unsure of her skills. Here is why.......

1)I have asked her numerous times (the first at my initial appt.) to call my first OB, AT HIS REQUEST, to go over my first pregnancy...she has yet to do that.

2) She DOES NOT MEASURE my uterine growth at my checkups OR palipate my stomach AT ALL. An appointment consists of listening to the baby's heartbeat, asking me if I have any questions and it's see you in 4 weeks.

What is going on here? Measuring uterine growth is ROUTINE! Also, I have been reading alot about femoral nerve injury during C-sections (or stomach surgery in general) and I am really starting to freak out about this woman because I think she is ignoring the issue completely.

Should I try to talk to her and ask her why she doesn't a)measure me/palipate me b)call my old DOC c)if she has any plan for my C-section b/c of my prior injury OR should I run for the hills???

[o_mom]

I would try to talk with her first. I know it is hard to do - you don't want to irritate the doctor that is going to be cutting you open. OTOH, you have valid concerns and worst case you don't see eye to eye and you find another doctor.

1) I would think she would be doing that.
2) I think measuring fundal height is usually standard. Palipating may be a non-issue since they are usually just looking to make sure the baby is head down. Since you are having a planned c-section it doesn't really matter until that point. They can also get a good idea of where the baby is based on the heartbeat location.

[kcandz]

I think you should ask her but in the meantime research another doc n case you don't like the answers or the attitude that may come with the answers.

FWIW a friend of mine changed her OB around 33 weeks to the complete freakout of her parents and DH and after the baby was born she said it was the best thing she ever did. She was natural delivery, no meds but I don't think that is important, what was important was that she felt her needs were taken care of up and through delivery.

[eliasmom]

I would start gathering recs of other OBs from friends and maybe give this OB one last chance. Bottom line: this is a big deal and you should feel totally comfortable with the person who will be handling this life event, esp after what you went through the first time, IMO.

As background, I almost changed to another OB in my doc's practice midway through my pg, but I decided that, with my luck, my original doc would be on call and it would awkward, at the very least, and possibly worse. In my case, she didn't even end up delivering, but she got much better towards the end. Earlier, I felt like she wasn't taking some of my medical concerns (I had severe back & hip pain that would possibly impact delivery positions, etc.) and that she wasn't really listening to me. She has been fabulous post-partum.

OTOH, I fired DD's 1st ped after her 4 mo visit and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. That doc was definitely NOT listening to DH and me and DD loves her current ped. She hated the 1st doc. So I think sometimes a change in doctors makes a big difference.

Good luck and don't feel bad about whatever decision you ultimately make. It's your life, it's your body, it's your baby....

[tarabenet]

I'll disagree with PPs. At this point, can she possibly give you answers that will regain your trust and confidence? I doubt it. Why waste the time? Why spend precious energy? Go find someone you can trust with your baby's life. Trust your instincts, Mama.

[KBecks]

I agree w/Benet, it sounds like you want a new doc. Find a new one, then cancel out with the current doc and go ahead and tell her why.

Maybe if you feel comforable calling your retired former OB to get his recommendations. Or, maybe he would reassure you if he knows your current OB has got the skills.

Good luck!!!

[megs4413]

FWIW, my high risk doc NEVER measured my fundal height, but we were having frequent ultrasounds due to the high risk nature of the pregnancy, so growth was monitored that way.

i would call (don't wait four weeks for an appt) and say you want to speak to the doc about some issues. if you're not comfortable after your talk, move on...though it could be hard to find a high risk doc at this point in the pregnancy who will be willing to deliver you (and who isn't in practice with this doc).

[elaineandmichaelsmommy]

ita with the pp, call your old doc and get some recomendations. If it's going this poorly with communication try to go somewhere else. It sounds like you're pretty unsure of this doc and worried. The last thing you need is for anything to elevate your blood pressure,jeez don't people think(Dh frequently said when I was pg with dc "Don't poke the bear folks,just give her what she wants!")
if your previous doc thought she should call him after retirement and she hasn't then you've got definate reason for red flags to be going off. Talk to her, ask her to explain herself. It's your body she's working on and she should be darn ready to explain her decisions to you. If you don't like her attitude or the answers you get then run for the hills.
Good luck, let us know how it goes.

[theamazingtrace]

Trust your instincts. We changed OBs at 20 weeks, and again at 35 weeks (!!!), and I am SO glad that we did. Hopefully you can get referrals from a trusted source as soon as possible! Good luck!

[infomama]

I don't think I can continue with her at this point. I have an appt. on Thursday with her so I'll have to make my final decision by then.

With luck I will be able to speak with my retired OB tomorrow and take it from there.

Thank for the feedback, as always.....