How do we shorten our good night ritual?

[gatorruth]

Without DS going balistic?

DS is 4 and our night time ritual takes 40 minutes. He goes right to sleep and never complains, so if we need to suck it up and deal with it, please let me know.

He puts PJ's on, pees, takes his meds, we brush his teeth. (this alone can take 15 minutes-- he's pokey with getting his pj's on...)

Then, I read him a book, and DH will read him a book. (We're fine with this!)

Then, and here's where we need some advice... he plays for 10 minutes. Not sure when/why/how we picked up this habit, but it's in the night time ritual.... (***Any advice on getting rid of this would be greatly appreciated!)

Then, after the 10 min of playtime, i tuck him in, then I have to come back and check on him in 1 minute (if I forget, he comes to find me...). Then, he's in bed for the night.


Please- if you have any advice, I'd appreciate it!

TIA!

[emmiem]

That routine is a piece of cake! We start baths at 7 and have to lie down with our children in their bed until they fall asleep. We never know when we can come back down. It can be 8:30 or later.
Michele

[SnuggleBuggles]

Sounds familiar with one exception; we don't wait for him to play. He has played himself to sleep since he was like 8 months old. I have no problems with this at all because he is happy, quiet and gets enough sleep. We don't care what he does after we say goodnight. :) We'll tuck him in, hugs, kisses and leave. He always gets out of bed and gathers toys to play with/ books to read in bed.

I don't know if you could get away with that but it works for us (and has for a long time :)).

Beth

[JustMe]

I think its a great routine, and agree that if you can do a little tweaking it would be great, but if not its pretty good the way it is.


I have two possible ideas...one, try to drop the playtime altogether by explaining to dc that that is what is going to happen and once his pjs are on there in no more playtime...then make sort of a first, then type chart with pictures that show all the steps in the nightime ritual in order (a pic of pjs, pic of brushing teeth, pic of meds, dont know that you need a pic of peeing but if so maybe just a pic of a toilet, pic of reading, and a pic of a child in bed...you can look for pics on the internet that you can print out. You could either stop there and see if this alone works or you could pair this with giving some kind of check/point for each night he does this well and 5 checks/points equals a very small dollar store type prize.

My other suggestion..what if you let dc play with toys after he gets his pjs on, takes meds, and brushes teeth...playing with toys immediately after might be a motivator to get those things done quickly. Then after he plays with toys you do everything the way you are doing it...I am not sure why this order seems just a little better to me than the way you have it...I think for me once dd is in bed with pjs and I read her a story I feel done except saying good night, so somehow it seems like that order makes more sense to me, but dont know if it really matters.

Dd almost always needs me to come back one more time. It adds to her security somehow. She goes right to sleep after that, so I am fine with that too.

Robyn

[kristenk]

I like the idea of changing the order, too, especially since it could help speed up the pj/bathroom process.

[gatorsmom]

I think you should count your blessings that it doesn't take longer. I know soooo many people that dread bedtime because it means kids screaming and throwing fits, dragging it out, etc.

Your routine sounds just like ours except for the play part. But we've always allowed our boys to bring toys or books to bed with them just before we tuck them in. However, once they are in bed, they have to stay in bed. So, they make sure to grab their toys before they get in bed because they know if they get out of bed after we've tucked them in, they'll be punished. Then I hear them playing or talking (they share a room) for a while before they finally go to sleep.

I bet that would work for you too, but if not, again, be grateful it's not more difficult!!

Lisa
Mom to Gator July 2003
And Cha-Cha July 2005
and surprise! twins due 11/07!

[TonFirst]

I agree that this really doesn't sound all that bad! It's similar to our ritual - pee, bath (or just wash hands and face), brush teeth, pajamas, stories, songs, night-night - but our son plays or looks at books in his bed after we've tucked him in and left his room.

Now, lately, we've had to go back in there for "one more hug and kiss!" because our son, as I noted a little while back, has developed some fears - namely, thunder. (Hello! We live in Atlanta! I WISH we had thunder, these days!) Start to finish, it takes about 40 minutes for our ritual - my husband usually does bedtime, and he's a sucker, so he usually reads at least five books and sings three songs before night-night.

[Piglet]

typing one handed

i think that if 40 minutes is too long for you then you have every right to want to change it. personally, i have way too much to do once the kids are in bed and i can't do a long bedtime routine. also if you ever get a babysitter, you want a routine that is easy to follow. these days, our routine is 15 minutes for the 2 boys and another 10 minutes for the baby.

i think you need to move the play time to the beginning or to right after pjs. to move playtime to the beginning you can start to say - bedtime is in 10 minutes, so why don't you have your play time now. eventually it won't even be associated with your ritual, rather it will be associated with the end of the day and the transition to bedtime. once you move playtime, your routine will be 30 minutes.

i know you are okay with reading 2 books, but would 1 be sufficient? we used to read 2 books because were putting ds1 and ds2 to bed at the same time and each one wanted his choice of book. eventually we switched to telling a story and reading a book. now we tell either a story or read a book. they don't seem to mind.

finally, as he gets more independent, the 15 minutes of getting into pjs, etc. will become his responsibility alone. ds1 now gets into his pjs and brushes his teeth without our involvement, so we are not part of that routine. that saves us 15 minutes. you might want to try to encourage him to do his pjs on his own and take a first pass at tooth brushing, and then he can call you to "inspect".

hth,