I am going nuts trying to get Kasey to poop on the potty - HELP!!!

[momathome]

Please, someone, give me some advice!!! Kasey is going no wear fast in the pooping department. She is 3 years and 3 months old, is now completely trained as far as peeing goes, even at night, but steadfastly refuses to poop on the potty - she will only poop in her pull-up. She has also been having severe constipation issues - about a month ago, she actually had a hemorrhoid from trying so hard to poop. She can go five days at a time between poops and we have started having to give her Milk of Magnesia at the advice of our doctor. I have tried bribing with presents, telling her she can take dance lessons, which she really wants to do, basically promising her the sun, moon, and stars if she just POOPS!!! I have tried dropping the subject for weeks, I have read her potty books, and yeah, I am ashamed to admit, I have "threatened" her with telling her she will not be able to go to preschool next year if she does not poop on the potty (her preshool expects 3 year-olds to be fully potty trained before entering school). I am at the end of my rope. Suggestions, please! Anyone???
-Lauren

[BethinMass]

I was in the same situation with my daughter :/ And umm, made the same threat.

I finally stopped getting so concerned about it. I did tell her if she did go poop on her potty she would get a toy and she could pick it out at the toy store. But I didn't press it, I just let her know. Was actually kind of cute, she'd say she had to go poop, I'd let her know, she'd said, I try next time mommy. After about 2 weeks, she finally went. I had to do it twice in a row, then boom she was allset and I just let her know that no more toys were coming, but she was being a very big girl.

I know how aggravating it is :/ but it's so out of our control. Try not to stress out about it, That's the only thing that kept me sane. Good news is that once my daughter "got it" we never had a poop accident.

Wishing you the best of luck, I know how tough it is.

[Jeanne]

I sympathize with you Lauren as we are in the same boat with Charlotte. No constipation issues here, but she just goes in her diaper and tell me she's going instead of using the potty. She treats pull-ups the same way even though she can tell us what they are supposed to be used for! We were doing so well in the beginning but have somehow regressed.

I've been using a timer every two hours lately. She's better with consistency if I prod her. No amount of bribing has helped here either! My thought is to work on it intensively this summer. She always asks to be changed right away so I know she's going to be very unhappy when she goes in her underwear and we are "slow" to change it!

[luvbeinmama]

Does she wear cotton underwear and ask for a pull-up to poop? Or have you been keeping her in pull-ups? If she's wearing the pull-ups regularly, you might try having her wear underwear instead and see if that has any affect. Especially, get some really nice underwear that she REALLY likes and wants to wear. It may be worth it for her to poop in the potty rather than soil her nice new pretty underwear. Just a thought...

[momathome]

Thanks, everyone! Right now, she is in just pull-ups. Since she is now reliably dry and she is done school next week, I think I am going to switch to underwear and make her ask me for a pull-up to poop. This is what my ped recomended when I spoke to him a few days ago. He also said that some behavioral "experts" would advise putting her back in diapers but I don't want her to regress given that she pees exclusively on the potty now. Plus, I am OVER diapers! I really, really hope she is completely trained before summer is over or pre-school is going to be tricky in the fall!
-Lauren

[luvbeinmama]

I thought she was in pull-ups from your original post. I agree with your ped and think that the "experts" advise to put her back in diapers is bunk!! Besides, most kids think of pull-ups AS diapers, so putting her in cotton will be a whole different thing for her. I hope it works for you! Remember to let HER pick out what she wants (less likely to poop in them). Good luck!!

[raynjen]

I really think that this is a "when they are ready" thing, but what worked for us was to completely eliminate all TV and put 3 new videos that she picked out IN the bathroom (immediate reinforcement). Whenever she asked for TV or the videos I would tell her that she got to watch when she pooped in the potty. I was wondering if she understood, but the first time she pooped the first thing she said was, "now I can watch Kipper!"

At this point after she poops she heads straight to the video cabinet to pick out her 'reward'.

Jen in Okinawa
Mom to Noelle (2 1/2)