View Full Version : Pre-school Dilemma: Do you socialize with other preschool families?

02-17-2005, 12:06 AM
Crosspost from the baby bargains lounge:
I'm trying to decide between a couple of pre-schools.

School #1 is the most amazing pre-school I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of them. Educationally, I really don't think I could find a better one. It's fantastic! The drawback is that it's 20 minutes away in another community.

Schools #2 & #3 are only very average. But, they are where most of the families around here are going to send their child. There's a good chance that Colin will go on to elementary school with a lot of these kids. We already probably know about a third of the kids in each class through different mommy & me classes we've taken over the past 2 years.

I'm worried that by choosing school #1, we'll miss out on developing friendships with the families that we're likely to be connected with for the next 12 years. And, that it will be harder to develop friendships at school #1 since we're further away, and not as much a part of that community.

The other drawback to school #1 is that it means I will have to give up going to MOPS and that's my main support system right now. I'm really torn- School #1 is such a phenomenal school- but I don't want to miss out on important friendships for me or DS.

Which school makes more sense? Are preschool friendships that important?


02-22-2005, 07:46 PM
Is it too late to reply to this one??

Sounds like a tough decision, and I hope this doesn't sound selfish but I think I'd be most concerned about giving up your own support system if you choose school #1. Kids are put in so many situations where they're able to spend time leisurely developing friendships that I think Colin would do fine in either place. It might be a bit harder adjusting to kindergarten if he's lost touch with the kids in your home town a bit, but I think it would still be a pretty quick transition. We moved a lot growing up and it wasn't until late elementary/junior high that the moves started getting tough.

Adult friendships just seem so much more elusive to me. Alice is in daycare 2-3 days a week, and while we do socialize with other families it's mainly just at the children's birthday parties. Really not a substitute for the mom friends I've made through playgroups at home--after spending hours chatting over coffee in each others living rooms. Pre-school might be a bit different though, especially if school #1 is a co-op and really encouraged more family interaction.

Good luck with your decision!

02-23-2005, 01:12 AM
Thanks Chris- it's not too late at all. I'm still agonizing here! I was out with my girlfriends from MOPS tonight and they helped me figure out a way that I might be able to pick preschool #1 and still go to MOPS so I'm feeling more optimistic. I just might get the best of both worlds!

Over the last few days I've realized that you're right- it really is the adult friendships that I am most worried about losing. When I'm at home all day, every day it's easy to forget how important that adult contact is. Even just the two hours out tonight reminded me that I *really* need my friends.

02-23-2005, 10:51 PM
I wanted to let you know that we rarely, if ever, socialize with folks from preschool (like the PP said, only a birthday parties). The only ones we ever spend time with is our carpool buddy and that is more because we go to the same church as well. I find that we socialize more with folks from our squadron (military, so I guess kinda like work?) than anyone else.

Jen in Okinawa
Mom to a wonderful preschooler,
who just turned three, Noelle!