CDing pep talk needed.

[katydid1971]

This weekend I had a baby shower and at one point it came out that I will be CDing. Of course everyone there started telling me how awful it would be and making bets about how soon I would give it up. This was a real downer for me, I know they just don't get it but I'm already scared to death than I'm going to hurt my baby because I don't know what I'm doing. I just need to hear from people who do CD that I'm doing the right thing. The good news is my mother and mother in law both think CDing is better and my husband likes it because it's cheaper.
Sarah
EDD May 20

[pittsburghgirl]

If your family is on board you are several steps ahead of a lot of CDers, I have seen many posts about grandmas who aren't that supportive, or DHs that aren't fully on board.

Your friends just don't know anything about it; you will NOT hurt your baby. In fact, you will be doing something really great for your baby, allowing natural fibers next to his/her body rather than paper/plastic all the time. And you will be generating less waste as well. Plus, it's FUN! (Nothing fun about putting on a perfumey smelly sposie.)

We didn't start CDing until DS was nearly 12 months and I WISH I had known how great it was when he was newborn. If we are lucky to have another child, the baby will be CD'd from the beginning!

If you are nervous that you don't know what you're doing, just start asking questions, the mamas here are AWESOME and will answer all of your questions... the only stupid question is the one you don't ask :)

Marilee
mommy to James
http://lilypie.com/baby2/040120/1/1/1/-5/.png

[kensjen]

Well, I am sure most of the people who were putting it down, have no idea what CDing is even like these days. I understand how frustrating it can be when everyone is giving you their opinion, when it is none of their business. Unfortunately, this will continue with every aspect of parenting. :(

Maybe you can take that negative energy and turn it around. Since they are so SURE that you will give it up, you have your chance to prove them wrong. Sometimes this can be the best incentive! ;)

At least your main support system (DH, mom, and MIL) are on your side, that is important. give CDing a chance, you have nothing to lose. But if you do like it, I think you have so much to gain. I wish I had CD my baby from the beginning, but I didn't start until he was about 4 months old. Once I got the hang of it, I never looked back. It has been great for us, and I hope you will grow to enjoy it as much as I do.

Don't let anyone get you down! This should be a HAPPY time for you. Remind anyone who decides to give you their opinion that you have made a decision that you feel is right for you, and then give them the look that says, "we are done talking about this".

Let us know how things go when the baby arrives. We'll be happy to help if you have any problems or concerns. You are due on my anniversary! ;)

[mudder17]

Hugs, Sarah!

I had much the same reaction when I told people I was planning on CD'ing. My department even said, "Well, we'll see how long that lasts!" As Jen said, you can turn that into a positive by using it as an incentive to prove them wrong! I did have a fellow teacher (in a different department) who CD'd all four of her kids and was still CD'ing the youngest two. She gave me a lot of suggestions, but the best thing she did for me was to show me that not only was it possible to CD, but it was possible to CD and do your own washing with no problems at all. The people on this board really helped make everything a reality.

My DH has been totally on board (he and I started this whole thing because of our belief it is better for the environment), so that has made things easier. But my whole family thinks it's pretty cool as well, and I'm hoping to convert my older sister by the time she has a baby. It may happen because she and her DH are also pretty sickened by the waste that goes on in our country, so their main reason is also environmental.

You will NOT be hurting your baby and in fact, you will be doing a great thing for your baby! Yes, there's a learning curve with CD'ing as there is in all things regarding a newborn, but the people here are wonderful and if one of us has not BTDT, then someone else has BTDT. The sum experience of people on this board has been invaluable to me as I try out new things or discover new things about DD.

Also, keep in mind, people who use disposables also have a learning curve of their own--they just don't see it that way because they figure it's the norm. But just because disposables are the norm in this country, it does NOT mean it's better for babies and that people who CD are harming their babies.



Eileen

Mother of Beautiful Kaya, www.chemicalgraphics.com/kaya
http://lilypie.com/baby2/040222/0/0/1/-5/.png

http://www.gynosaur.com/assets/ribbons/ribbon_gold_12m.gif
12.5 months: 30", 19.7 lbs, 47 cm head

[ktshea]

If people are making bets about how long you'll keep it up, then join in on the betting! You can use your winnings to buy some fun dipes. Maybe a cashmere cover... :)

Seriously, though, I have had so many people tell me they're surprised that we're still going strong with cloth diapers, after nearly four months. It's been so easy, though: diapers go into the Diaper Champ, bag gets dumped upside down into the washing machine instead of tied up and put into the trash can. No yuck factor at all. It's really not a big deal -- I thought it would be much harder than it has turned out to be. Of course, I may change my mind once DD starts eating solids, but we'll deal with that when we get there! If this is something you want to do, then you can most definitely do it. And the ladies around here are great for help & support.

Good luck!
Katie

[mommyj_2]

People always feel they know what's best for other people's babies, but they don't. In time, you'll learn to tune other people out when they start telling you how you should parent. I'm sure they haven't done research on the disposable diaper industry, or they wouldn't be telling you that cloth will hurt your baby. How could it hurt your baby any more than wearing clothes hurts babies? After all, they're both made of natural fabrics. Our society as a whole is so grossed out by the body, many people don't take a step back and question the prevailing attitudes about things like diapers, pads, or beauty products.
People reacted the same way when I told them I was planning to CD my baby. Well, guess what? They were completely wrong. I CDed my baby from the day we brought him home from the hospital, and it was a great experience. I had a lot of fun with it. You spend so much time changing diapers as a mom, it really is great to be able to have cute diapers to look at while you're dealing with poop.
I'm sure you know about rhe chemicals they put in disposables, so the argument that cloth is harmful to your baby just seems pretty ridiculous . How is it better to put chemicals next to your baby's skin, and to contribute to polluting the world with that many more chemical diapers that will sit in landfills? That's not to mention all the paper wasted with disposable wipes, or the plastic bags used to throw away the diapers.
I've found that people want others who are making informed decisions about the environmment to fail, because it helps them justify their unwillingness to go against the norm to do something that might be good for their health, or for the environment. I've heard similar arguments about nursing my DS, and they almost always come from people who haven't bothered doing any research to find out what really is good or bad for babies.
I;ll get off my soap box now. I just wanted to say cheer up, Mama! I'm guessing you will love CDing. It really is a lot of fun, and there's nothing cuter than a little babe in a cloth dipe.

[pritchettzoo]

How incredibly rude! I'm sorry they got you down at your shower. I think it's funny when people who have NO IDEA what it's like to CD say how awful it is. Same thing with breastfeeding. Why on earth people get the idea that it's any of their damn business is beyond me.

It's pretty hard to hurt your baby with cloth. After all, it's soft and fluffy! ;) I was scared too. I knew no one IRL who CD'ed. My mom did with me, but it was giant prefolds and pins and rubber pants! Ignore them and let your support system help you. And we're always here to listen.

Anna
Mama to Gracie (Sept '03)
and a BOY! (coming July '05)

[Puddy73]

Hugs to you! I remember second-guessing every decision that I made as a soon-to-be mom, so I think your feelings are normal. But regardless of what anyone says, it is your baby and you know what is best! I agree with the pps that the people at your shower probably aren't aware of all the cool cloth diapers that are now available. Before I found this board, the only cloth diapering system that I was familiar with was scratchy birdseye diapers with pins and plastic covers - not a very appealing option! It sounds like the people close to you are supportive, and I'm sure that will help. The ladies on this board are also a wealth of information and advice when you do run into problems (and we all do, regardless of whether we use disposables or CDs!) You won't hurt your baby with CDs, even if you are a little unsure of yourself at first. Just remind yourself, its only pee and poop.

Good luck!

Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle Mae 9/8/03

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

[KrisM]

I got this, too. Then, people start to see what CDing is these days and alter their opinions. They might not join you in CDing, but they'll realize it's not pins and plastic pants any more.

We didn't use cloth until about 1 week old. Our first few disposible diapers were pretty funny! It took both DH and I to figure them out (front and back both have cartoons??) and get one onto DS. When we switched to cloth, it was just as bad. But, after another week or so, it was a piece of cake. Both ways have definite learning curves.

I'm glad your DH, mom, and MIL are on your side. That will help a lot!

[katydid1971]

I also don't know anyone IRL who CD'd except maybe people my parents age. It's funny because my mom from the start was very much in support of CDing because she thinks it's better for the baby's skin and once I got online and start doing reading at places like here and the diaper pin I was really excited to CD. I know it just need to ignore those people who didn't because they won't have anything good to say about it, but it's hard sometimes. It's also hard when there is no where you can just go and see it done IRL. We need to start CDing groups like LLL. This site has been a god send to me, I come a read through the postings all the time and I have learned so much. Thank you all for your support. I can do it, it will be the very best thing for my baby.
Thanks again.
Sarah

[brigmaman]

Glad you're feeling a lot better. My family (other than my mom) doesn't support CDing or nursing. As for Cding, my in laws offered to buy us a years worth of sposies. They also bombarded my dh when I wasn't around with warnings like "poo will be running down dd's legs/ your house will smell/ etc." Luckily dh (who wasn't fully on board at the time) supported me. :)
I don't know anyone IRL who CD's but it worked out ok. I just come here for everything.;)
Look forward to meeting your little one!

[lizajane]

oh, how little they know...

you'll have to get at least one super cute dipe so that you can show them how awesome your baby's bum looks compared to a boring ol' paper diaper.

you are going to LOVE cds. every time ANYONE asks me, "so how's the cloth diaper thing going?" i just look right at them and SMILE and tell them the absolute truth- I LOVE IT!!! i truly do.

so here's a pep talk- i have TWO in cloth and i LOVE IT and i can't imagine giving it up. and i have TWO super soakers so i have to change often and wash often. it doesn't trouble me at all. it makes me so happy! cloth diapers are diapers to me. that's just how it is around here. and that is how it will be for you.

[alaible]

I heard the same thing. And mostly it was from people who had never even tried cloth diapers or from the older generation who aren't familiar with all the new types of cloth diapers available. Yes it is a little bit more work having to do a little more laundry but the cost savings and environmental impact make that well worth it to me. Baby #2 will be arriving March 24th and I plan on cloth diapering her as well. And this time around I will have 2 in cloth diapers because my oldest is just 2 and showing no interest in potty training yet.

If it were really that bad I wouldn't consider doing it again with the new baby. But I kept all Paige's cloth diapers as she outgrew them and I bought a few extras just in case in those early days I am so busy with 2 kids I don't get to do laundry as often as I would like.

[brittone2]

Just ignore them, and then once your baby arrives, show off all those cute dipes to the nay sayers and let them be j-e-a-l-o-u-s!

:)

We had no plans to CD originally, although we had talked about it and I had admired the cute dipes on this board more than once. Once DS was born, DH really was the one that started pushing the idea a bit. I wasn't sure it was something I wanted to do. I started reading and decided to give it a try when he was just under 3 weeks old...he's now 13 months and we still Loooove cloth :) Lots of my friends just don't get it, but that's okay. You have to deal with poopy dipes no matter what...it isn't all that hard to just toss 'em right in the wash. Seriously. DH and I definitely agree that sposies smell way worse. In fact, even when DS pees in a sposie (we recently had our house up for sale and with showings, I ended up using some sposies), we swear it smells like poopy dipe. Something about the scent of the dipe mixed w/ pee.

Most people just envision plastic pants and flat fold type dipes from Babies R US. They don't know how easy and cute it can be :) Stick with your plan for now if you are happy with it!

[amazz]

Sarah--
I haven't read the other responses and I don't CD, but I just wanted to give you some encouragement anyway. It is YOUR decision how you want to raise your child. Those women had no right to make you question your decision to CD. POO-POO ON THEM! I know lots of mamas on this board who LOVE CDing for a number of different reasons. And I think you have already overcome one of the biggest obstacles--getting your DH on board!!

Congratulations on your pregnancy and keep coming here for CD support!
Angela
Mama to Kami Allyse (10/10/04)http://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/otn/love/luvlove.gif[/IMG]
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. ~Carl Sandburg

[kijip]

I say join the betting pool and pocket the winnings! For gosh freaking sake HOW RUDE! Modern cloth is so much nicer than what these folks were thinking of anyway. Further, you are doing a great thing for your pocketbook (if you can avoid becoming a hyena), a great thing for the environment and a great thing for your baby. AND last but not least...a great thing for your photo album! Even a Prefold and a prowrap make for WAY CUTER pictures than paper, to say nothing of an adorable print or slick pocket.

[emelsea]

I'm sorry that the guests at your shower were so unthoughtful. Unfortunately, there will always be those people who think they know better and aren't afraid to let you know. One thing I've learned in the past 6 monthes of mothering is that when another Mom or Dad shares their choices with me, I say "Good for you!!" (unless whatever they are doing is dangerous).

How we go about parenting is such a personal thing, and everyone wants to do it right, I think that when someone chooses to do something out of the ordinary (in this case, your choice to CD) it can make other's uncomfortable b/c they might feel like you are saying that their methods are wrong. Does that make sense?

For me, it was my choice to breastfeed. My mom has not let up from day one that this is a bad thing. She never shuts up (excuse me for being so blunt, but I'm at the end of my rope with her) about it. Every month she asks me if DS is growing, and she has to eat crow as he continues to be in the 90th percentile or higher for weight and height. I think she is just waiting for him to start wasting away.

Have faith, Momma!! As long as you use your brain AND your heart when you make decisions, you can't go wrong. You won't hurt your babe, you won't break him, I promise they really are sturdy.

Just come here anytime you need a confidence boost.