Adopting "older" infant -- what gear will I need? Help!

[Cyndi]

My head is spinning! We are adopting a baby from overseas, and he will most likely be 8 to 12 months old when we bring him home. I don't know where to start...I've just spent two hrs at Babies R Us, and so much of the stuff is geared to newborns. Orphan babies are generally really small, so I wouldn't expect him to be more than 12-15 lbs. Do I need all the stuff a mom with a newborn needs, like the infant carrier, etc. What about the "travel system" strollers and the rear-facing infant car seats? When does a baby start to use a high chair? I'm so confused! I wish someone would put together a list of "must haves" for first time, clueless adoptive parents.

Thanks for any help!

Cyndi in Fort Worth

[Geebee]

LAST EDITED ON Jul-23-01 AT 09:08PM (Mountain)[p]That last line of your post is amusing.

Here's an educated guess from what I know about baby products (I have a 17 month old).

CAR SEAT: Skip the infant carseat/carrier and go with an infant/toddler car seat. Find one that is rear facing up to 30 lbs and forward facing up to 40 lbs. The infant carrier/carseats are good for that newborn-sleep-all-the-time-phase and for the smaller size of the newborns. Some newborns outgrow the infant carrier/carseats very quickly (there is also a height limit of 27 to 29 inches). You will get more use out of the infant/toddler carseat with the age of your baby. I have a Century Accel, and it works fine (around $60, 5 point harness, forward facing tether strap, rear facing to 30 lbs, forward facing to 40 lbs, and it has chest clip)

STROLLER: No need for a travel system. Go with something that you can use long-term. If you are suburban mom, look for lightweight and compact folding. And in your situation, I'd get something that reclines for comfort. I like the Peg Perego Plikos, but the price is high at $200. They are padded and appear comfortable (but who really knows) and have a 5 point harness for squirmy-Mc-toddler.

HIGH CHAIR: For an 8 to 12 month old, you will probably need a high chair. Are orphan babies also slower in muscle development? If you think that, at 8 months, your baby might not be able to sit up, I'd look at high chairs with the recline feature.

CRIB: Maybe this is obvious, but he needs someplace to sleep.

MONITOR: Always helps your piece of mind to be able to hear your little one, especially in the beginning.

And that's all that I can think of that you may need in the beginning. (Well, okay, the monitor isn't a need, but it is a nice to have.)

I hope that helps!

Good luck with your new baby, and I hope that everything goes well for you!

[cyndiconrow]

thanks, that is a big help, especially the info on the car seats. I have a cyber friend who is picking up her just - turned - seven month old right now, so she will probably be a good source of information too.

Only thing is, on the stroller...we really want the fully-decked-out kind, with the huge basket, cup holders, all that. At least my husband does. I would rather invest in something really lightweight. So we may get two: one for big trips to the mall and one for travel.

I like the price on your carseat, too! I'll have to look for it.

Oh, and as far as muscle development goes...orphan kids are pretty behind on development all around. They say you can deduct one month of development for every three months in the orphanage. So a six month old would be more like a four month old, etc. And like I said they are waaaay smaller than their healthy American friends. I think my friend's 7 month old weighs about 12 pounds.

Thanks again, your response was really helpful!

Cyndi
Adopting this fall from Ukraine

[Gia]

I'm glad that I could help. This must be a really exciting time for you.

I understand about the stroller. It seems like most people end up with two. I like the cup holders and large basket of the stroller that came with my travel system, but I couldn't bear to lug it out of the trunk one more time. It didn't bother my husband as much since men have more upper body strength. In addition, he only dealt with the stroller on the occasional weekend, but I dealt with it much more often since I stay at home. The stroller also took up a lot of trunk space (less room for mega bags of diapers...haha). For me, I guess lightweight and compact won out over cupholders and a large basket. It seems like now you might find one that is lightweight and has cupholders (maybe I read that Graco has one? I can't remember).

And knowing that the development is slower, definitely look at the recline of the stroller. Some just have two positions, sitting up or flat. You might want a stroller with 3 or 4 recline positions. Newborns don't mind being flat, but an older baby, like 7 or 8 months, might want to be partially reclined if he/she can't sit up. Even babies that have just started sitting along can't do it for very long. The partial recline might be very helpful for you. Older babies are generally more interested in seeing the world.

And, since I live in the Dallas area, I'm assuming that you are suburban mom (who lives in downtown Ft Worth?).

I really help everything goes well for you.

[Emmie]

We are also adopting an older infant and I feel confident that I bought the right equipment. We skipped the travel systems and bought the Britax convertible car seat and a Combi stroller that reclines. You won't need the head supports or sleep supports. I also already purchased a high chair but skipped any sort of bouncy seat. My baby will be 7 months so she might be reaching and sitting up a little. Hope this helps.
Emmie

[cyndiconrow]

Thanks Emmie! Which Combi stroller did you get?

And Gia, we live right near DFW airport, so there will be alot of strollering around malls and stuff, but not on city streets. We also travel a lot.

Alot of people live in downtown Fort Worth, BTW. Lots of neat loft apartments around Sundance Square and the Bass Hall, you should check it out sometime!

Thanks again

Cyndi from Fort Worth

[Geebee]

Do you live in Ft Worth or a suburb? I live near DFW, also, in Coppell.

Actually, downtown Fort Worth is great. I've had some really nice times there. And I worked in downtown Fort Worth for 6 months, and it is a great place to work (I really enjoyed walking to lunch). I just didn't think that anyone lived there.

[cyndiconrow]

Hi again, we live in Fort Worth city limits but our mail comes to the Euless PO so we have a Euless address. We're right by the American Airlines HQ building.

Thanks again for all your ideas. The advice is priceless!

Cyndi

[Cody]

Congratulations...how wonderful!
You did not say which country but some friends adopted a orphan baby from Russia and he was not underweight but quite chunky. They feed them a lot of carbs..Asian babies however tend to be quite small.

Our daughter is 15 months so we just went through the pre-walking stage - it is wonderful.

Some thoughts:

1. A good wheel system on your outdoor stroller is really important, also think about handle height if your husband is 6' or taller. The mall strollers don't stand up to outdoor use. But focus on a light weight stoller for the mall (one of those medium priced with a couple of recline positions will do the trick)

2. We really like the Alpha-Omega car seat from Cosco. This gives you recline/rear and forward facing and a booster seat in one. Note, the Walmart model is NOT as well padded as the BabiesRUs model. There is a reason why it is cheaper!!

3. Little extras...lots of board books and music. This is a great age to introduce books. Baby Lego is also a great idea.

Have a wonderful time with your new little one.

[emmiem]

>Thanks Emmie! Which Combi stroller did
>you get?
>>
>
We bought the Ultra Savvy. It's very lightweight, reclines, has a good basket, and only weights 11 pounds. I also bought the Combi Legacy which has been discontinued but can be found online at the combi website and other sites. I bought mine at a baby specialty store for half price! It's more full size but very light.
Hope that helps.
Emmie

[samwhatam]

My husband and I are also adopting from a foreign country (Korea to be exact). I am getting ready to buy the car seat, and the Alpha-Omega is one of the finalists. Is there any thing you can tell me about it pro or con that could help?

As far as the inital question about what to get, we had those same questions and many answers from many different people. So far the best thing that we've gotten is our crib. It was from Toys R Us at about $200 and it goes from crib to toddler bed and then to full size bed. The one rail release isn't a big deal since we have it up against a wall, and it is pretty easy to use. We have been practicing with all of our equipment so we have a clue when he actually gets here.

Thanks for the question.