View Full Version : Frustrated with the pacifier

jonahs mommy
12-04-2003, 11:45 AM
I have started the CIO method (as much as it breaks my heart) this week and he's responding well to FALLING ASLEEP on his own. But a new problem has emerged for our 10 1/2 week old son...

When he starts crying in the middle of the nap or in the middle of the night, it's not because he wants to be held, rather, he wants to suck. This happens if he goes to sleep without his pacifier or if he goes to sleep with it.

He is not sleeping through the night so I'm used to responding to his cries at night by nursing him. On a good night before this problem started, he was up at 3 am and up around 6-7 am. Now he will awaken at any given moment when he realizes he doesn't have his pacifier.

We've thought through many different options: don't give him his pacifier at all (but does he still have a need to suck at this age?), ignore his cries during naptime/night altogether (but what happens when he continues to cry until it's time for him to eat again and I take him out of his crib to nurse. Isn't that defeating the purpose of letting him cry?), comfort him by picking him up without giving him his paci, comfort him by giving him his pacifier and placing him back in his crib hoping that he won't notice it's missing?

We need advice.

12-07-2003, 03:03 PM
I'm no expert on this, but we only recently started CIO. Ryan is 8 months. At 10 weeks, I think they really need to suck. When Ryan was that age, I would go back in, put the pacifier in his mouth, rub his back and let him get back to sleep. He ended up sleeping through the night at 3 months, but unfortunately, for the last 2 months started having a ton of nightwakings. That's what prompted us to finally try CIO. I hate it :( We've only been doing it for a week, but he is back to sleeping for about 8 hours straight before he wakes up.
Good Luck!

12-08-2003, 07:25 AM

I think at this age you'll have to replace the pacifier. The need to suck is so strong when babies are this young. DD didn't sleep through the night until she learned to suck her thumb when she was around 12 weeks old.

Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03

01-06-2004, 11:57 PM
I have a 7 week old and am curious about how your daughter learned to suck her thumb (my ds keeps trying but can't do it yet). Did you give her a pacifier or let her work on her hands until she got it?

01-07-2004, 11:13 AM
She learned it on her own. She wouldn't even take the pacifier. She started by sucking on her fingers and then moved on to the thumb. It was really aound 12 weeks when she sucked her thumb and slept through the night.

Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03

01-09-2004, 04:43 PM
>I have a 7 week old and am curious about how your daughter
>learned to suck her thumb (my ds keeps trying but can't do it
>yet). Did you give her a pacifier or let her work on her
>hands until she got it?

I think they have to mature a little more than 7 weeks to have enough gross motor ability to maneuver their hands to their mouths on purpose. My son is not quite 10 weeks and over the past weeks has slowly been getting close and closer to doing it himself. Once at around 4 or 5 weeks I got his thumb in there but his hands were still floppy and controllable by me.

Mama to Leon 11/2/03

01-18-2004, 12:14 AM
At 10.5 weeks, baby's sucking reflex is still strong. I would encourage you to give him his pacifier, or nursing him for comfort so that he can fulfill his sucking need.

01-20-2004, 09:32 AM
ok--I could have written your words Traci. My son is doing the exact same thing. I thought he was too young to CIO but our pediatrician felt it was ok in increments. Last night was horrible. I don't know if going to him every 15 minutes is right for him. He too looks for his paci or thumb-- can't quite find thumb yet--- He does self settle sometimes, but often I just give up and go to nurse him again. My DD was 7 months old before sleeping through the night and it took us until 6 months to let her CIO. It chaged all of our lives-- she became a happy well rested baby-- so I knew it was right for her. I just wonder if my DS is too young to get the concept. Also-- If I just end up nursing him/ replacing the paci then-- is he really falling alseep on his own. I am curious to see how things are for you now.
I think this is why all lullabys seems to be written in the minor key-=- you don't want them to grow up-- but you sure would love them to sleep!!!