View Full Version : CIO with a pacifier?

01-20-2004, 10:36 PM
Hi everyone,

I'm new to these boards, but I saw that a lot of you have experience with CIO (I'm picking up Ferber's tomorrow, have already read Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution" and Wiessbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child") -- I have a pretty specific question that Wiessbluth doesn't seem to address.

My DS, Adin, will be 7 months old on Saturday. He has a very erratic sleep schedule, but in general I put him down between 6-7pm. Some nights, I nurse him and he falls asleep nursing (have to switch to the binky as soon as I pull him off or he wakes). Other nights he doesn't and I give him a binky and lie down with him and he plays with my hair as he falls asleep. For a time he was capable of falling asleep on his own in his crib (put on his bedtime cd, give him his lovey and his binky, he'd fuss for a few minutes, then fall asleep if the binky didn't fall out). Now (due to teething? holidays? houseguests? who knows?!) he absolutely refuses to go into his crib whether or not he is asleep. If I'm holding him and try to put him in there, he wakes and screams. If he's still a little awake, he starts screaming. During the day he plays in there, so I don't think he's afraid of it... not sure what's going on.

The first time he wakes (usually wakes 4-5x a night to nurse), if he's not already in my bed, I get him and we co-sleep for the rest of the night, until he wakes for the day between 7-8am. I have to admit, that with co-sleeping and nursing, I don't mind the night wakings all that much. My biggest concern is his complete dependence on me or the binky to fall asleep. I have tried Pantley's removal technique, but it hasn't worked yet. The last few nights have been an absolute battle getting him to bed because he starts to fuss and loses the binky and can't get it back in by himself, so I go get it for him, and as soon as he sees me (I am a single mom, so there's no one else to do it), he gets even more worked up. I need to help him be less dependent on me to sleep because soon he will start spending more time with his dad, and once he is weaned (1yr) he will start spending the night there.

Although I didn't want to, I am ready to try CIO. My main question is how do I do this with a child with SUCH a strong suck-to-sleep association? Just let him cry though it? Does anyone who has already read/tried Ferber know what he says about it?

Any suggestions at all would be MUCH appreciated!!


01-21-2004, 07:37 PM
My daughter had to have her pacifier to stay asleep also. She also went through a phase where she took it out herself and then cried because she couldn't get it back in. At any rate, I don't know what Ferber says about it, but we let her cry for 15 minutes before we'd go back in and give her the pacifier. Now she doesn't need it to fall asleep or fall back to sleep when she wakes up.

Something else you might consider...I think it is right about 7 months that babies start to realize there is only one of you and they start to go through separation anxiety.


02-13-2004, 02:24 PM
I have all of the sleep books that you have. I found the No Cry Sleep Solution to be pretty useless for the most part, though did end up doing her suggestion of a "lovey" which worked out great for us. I think the suggestions she gave reinforced bad sleep associations. Though I suppose it is a good book for parents who cannot deal with their baby crying at all.

Ferber worked great for us and it was not nearly as bad as we thought it would be. I think it took us 2 nights...maybe an hour or so each night.

I refer to Ferber's and Weissbluth's books all of the time for my 18 month DD and 4 month DD. You do get your money's worth out of these books.

Good luck!