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valou73
10-25-2004, 10:10 AM
Hi - My baby girl is almost 13 months and we are still having sleep issues!! It is obviously our fault but now we feel we need to really do something about it. Every night, our bed time ritual includes a warm bottle and then we rock her to sleep and then put her down. I think this has attributed to her waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to fall back asleep by herself. Once she wakes up, we will then pick her up and let her fall asleep again and often she will wake up as we are putting her down. HELP!!! I was thinking of starting the Ferber Method. Is she too old for that? If I don't do anything now, will she soon understand what she is supposed to do? I really have trouble hearing her cry and am not sure what I should do.

Any advice would be welcome.

Thanks, Valerie

jillc
10-27-2004, 12:10 AM
Hi Valerie,

Poor you! Your description fits my daughter to a "t". We have the same thing going on, but DD is only 7 months old. She wakes about every 45 min from 7:30-midnight, and then once or twice more after that. We also pick her up & pat her & then put her back down asleep, w/her sometimes waking again immediately. I just don't want to make her feel abandoned by letting her CIO, and I'm not a CIO kind of mom. It would break my heart to hear her crying & not go to her. I recently borrowed "The No Cry Sleep Solution" from a friend, which I really liked. I read it & tried to incorporate some of her tips into our bedtime routine, but Abby's nights still were varying - lots of waking some nights, and then only waking a few times other nights.

But...

This past weekend, she kept waking w/i 5 minutes every time I put her down. DH wasn't home, and I spend over 2 hours trying to get her to sleep, and I was exhausted and at the end of my rope. Finally, I just set her in her crib, kissed her, and left her room. I lied on my bed & listened to her cry, knowing that if she sounded frantic, or if my heart just couldn't bear it, I would go to her as usual. And her crying didn't get frantic. And I hung in there. And 22 minutes later, she fell asleep. She did wake a few times later that night & we ended up doing our usual thing. The next 2 nights, when she woke during the evening, we let her cry. Again she didn't get frantic, and within 5(!!!!) minutes, she was asleep. Sunday night, she slept for 11.5 hours straight - that's her record!! Last night, she woke at 4am, and I figured she was legitimately hungry, so I fed her & snuggled while she fell asleep. She cried at 5:30am, but I decided I could be strong & ignore. She conked out again after less than 5 min, and slept until 8:15 - another record.

So... I just thought I would share my experience. I haven't done any reading on the Ferber method, so I can't comment on that. I know it helps to hear from others who are in your situation. I didn't think I would ever be able to take a CIO approach. And I know that I would have & still will go to her if her crying were to be frantic or if it lasted very long. It was tough for me to last the 22 minutes that first night, but I was just so tired. I'm going to keep trying this & as long as she settles quickly, I'm going to stick it out. I think we're having good results for relatively short periods of crying, and I'm hoping she's learning how to sleep w/o our help.

Whatever you decide to do, good luck. Your DD has a great mommy. :)

Jill