Update: Thank you!!!

[Jeanmick]

"How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, and Listen So Kids Will Talk" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

If so, what are your thoughts about it? I have a three-year old DD and we are having some issues right now with defiance and testing limits and I'm truly at a loss as to what to do. If any of you have suggestions on how to deal with this or a review of the above mentioned book, I'd SOOOO appreciate it.



Edited to Add: I just got "1-2-3 Magic" and I really like it! It truly fits my philosophy of discipline. As a matter of fact, I was already implementing the "1-2-3" using different words and didn't even know it. The book will help me refine the techniques I use already. Thank you so much for the recommendation Jessica and Beth!

[redhookmom]

I checked that book out of the library. I don't remember much about it except that I would check it out again when my kids were older.

1-2-3 Magic worked great with my 3, now 4 year old. I don't really like the idea of counting but the ideas in the book are good. Instead of counting I use his name and then his first and last name... We never get to 3 anymore.

[Jeanmick]

I'll be sure to check that book out. Thanks for the suggestion.

[egoldber]

I really like that book, but I think the ideas will work better for an older child.

I also really like 1-2-3 Magic. I don't "count" either, but she gets two warnings and then timeout. It has worked well for us.

HTH,

[AugBaby]

I really enjoyed "HTTSKWL", but found I needed more. The best book I've read on discipline has been Barbara Coloroso's "Kids Are Worth It". It divides parenting into three different types - Jellyfish, Backbone and Brickwall. It describes the characteristics of the 3 in many different situations and the pitfalls of the two extremes. I thought I was pretty good with discipline but found that I definitely have room for improvement! I was surprised at how sometimes I fell into the two less-than-desirable parenting styles when I never would have thought I would.

She advocates natural consequences as the results of actions - I throw my doll/My doll is put away for awhile, I write on the wall/I help clean the wall - and goes on to show that discipline does not equal punishment.

I found it really interesting and it has definitely influenced my parenting for the better.