Post your dc funnies

[SnuggleBuggles]

I asked my 5.5yo to put his coat on when we went to run an errand. I told him it was cold and I didn't want people to think I was a bad mom for letting her child out without a coat. He said, "They wouldn't think you are a bad mom. You take care of the baby. Just squirt milk at them and they'll know you are a good mom." I have no idea where that came from but it cracked me up. Whenever anyone doubts my parenting abilities I know how to change their minds. :)

Beth

[LarsMal]

"Just squirt milk at them..." LOL! That is too cute!

Mine isn't quite as funny, but DS has discovered the purpose of batteries lately. Last week I didn't want to plug the lights in on our super-dry tree, so I told DS they weren't working. He looked at me and said, "Needs new batteries" and then today I finally got his Kettrike bike and it was way more complicated to put together than I thought so I told him I'd have to do it later. He again thought for a minute and said, "Needs new batteries". :-)

[randomkid]

Where do I start? DD is just full of them these days:

Just before Christmas, DD was helping me with yard work (yes, it's year 'round here in FL). She has her own little gardening gloves and she puts branches, etc. in the garbage can for me. This was a particularly large job and she stayed with it for probably an hour. I was surprised that she stayed with it so long. Suddenly, she stopped, looked at me, took off her gloves and said "I'm done with this! I'm going in the house!" Without missing a beat, she turned and marched into the house. I followed her in where she threw her gloves on the kitchen table (like, the heck with this). I was just standing there in shock, staring at her. When she looked at me, she just started laughing. It was so cute - and just a little too grown up, IYKWIM!

A couple of quick ones:

At Christmas, we always say "I need a knife" when a package has tape (someone always has a pocket knife). DD's first gift was taped shut - she looked up and just as natural as ever said "I need a knife!"

Last night, I was wiping her face with a warm washcloth. As soon as it touched her face, she said "Don't BURN me!"

She just cracks us up on a daily basis these days :)

[Bean606]

"Merry Piss-Piss" - HIs version of Merry Christmas

"Much better" - after we change a dirty diaper.

And my personal favorite:

He has started counting, and he counted up to nineteen and then said "ten-teen" instead of "twenty"

[Davids-Coco]

DS was nursing the other evening in bed and was on the side that puts him between me and DH. So he reaches back and grabs DH's hand. I'm thinking how sweet that is because he always holds my hand when nursing. He proceeds to bring DH's hand up and place it on my other boob. So I tell DH to knock it off and that it isn't funny. He swears he didn't do it and I throw their hand off. A minute later it happens again, and again, and again. I grab DS's arm and sure enough, those little muscles are going and he is the one doing it. DH says he was just sharing the love! I was laughing so hard I think DS got a milkshake.

[ChunkyNicksChunkyMom]

I overheard Nick singing the Driedle song in his bathroom and went in to see what he was doing. He had found one of the big blue nose syringe bulb things that they give you at the hospital and thought it was a Driedle, spinning in round and round in delight. ( We watch Calliou a lot).

[octmom]

I overheard Nick singing the Driedle song in his bathroom and went in to see what he was doing. He had found one of the big blue nose syringe bulb things that they give you at the hospital and thought it was a Driedle, spinning in round and round in delight. ( We watch Calliou a lot).

Ha! We watch a lot of Caillou too and DS picked up the Driedle song also! :) We aren't Jewish, but DS likes to participate in all holidays. For a week or so around Christmas, he kept wishing everyone, "Merry Christmas Eve! Merry Christmas! Happy Harmonica (his version)! Happy New Year!"

[JoyNChrist]

Well, Avery's not talking yet (just mama, dada, and bye-bye), so no real funnies, but this did kind of crack me up.

When I have to tell him no about something, I usually point my finger at him and say "Uh Uh!" So now he'll just randomly furrow his little brow and point his finger at me and jabber away, like he's fussing at me. It's pretty cute.

And lots of times when I tell him to say "Mama," he'll look at me for a second and then grin really big and say "DaDa!" then burst out laughing. And I know he knows how to say Mama...I really think he's just picking on me.

[JoyNChrist]

Okay this...


I was laughing so hard I think DS got a milkshake.

and this...


Happy Harmonica (his version)!

Had me LOL! :ROTFLMAO:

[Gena]

Christmas 2006, DS really didn’t get the whole Santa Claus thing. He ran around the house happily singing “Applesauce is coming to town!” We told him about Santa, we read books about Santa, we took him to see Santa. Despite everything he remained a firm believer in Applesauce. This past Christmas, he understood a little more. He knew that Santa was coming at Christmas, but insisted that Santa brings applesauce for good boys and girls. So every year we end up puting a small container of Motts in his stocking to make him happy.

Another funny bit from several months ago: DS really loves his alphabet magnets on the fridge and gets upset if any of the letters are missing. So one day he kept repeating “Where is D? Where is D?” I found the “D” and the “d” and handed them both to him. I told him “Look. Mommy found the big D and the little d.” My 3 year old looked at me very seriously and said, “It’s called uppercase D and lowercase d.”

[californiagirl]

DD (4 in March) was putting on chapstick, which she thinks is lipstick. "When A [her grandfather] comes to my birthday party, I'm going to put lipstick on him, so he can be a clown!" "What if he doesn't want to be a clown?" "I'll put lipstick on him so he can be a ballerina." "Won't the beard be a problem for putting on the lipstick for a clown, or being a ballerina?" "Well, it's only a short beard."

He says he's going for ballerina -- and keeping the beard. If Les Ballets Trockadero de Monte Carlo can do it, so can he.

[dotgirl]

Christmas 2006, DS really didn’t get the whole Santa Claus thing. He ran around the house happily singing “Applesauce is coming to town!”

I love that! It's so cute- and the "applesauce in the stocking" is clever!

Our DS has gotten more interested in interacting with some of the shows he watches - JoJo and Little Einsteins, for example. (We doin't have cable, but we have Comcast for our internet, which lets us watch Disney stuff online.)

A couple of nights ago, JoJo said, "Now can you help me?" in that 'involving the viewer manner', and Riley just said, "No."

So I said, "You can't help her? Why not?"

He said, "Because she's in the *computer*, and I don't know how to get *in* there."

[buddyleebaby]

Dh recently ditched his curls and got a short almost-buzzcut.

This morning I told him he had bedhead, and that I didn't know it was possible with short hair.

DD1 said "Daddy does not HAVE any hair."

So I ran my hand over the top of his head and said "He doesn't? What is this?"

She said, matter of factly, "That's his FUZZ!"

Heehee.

[Davids-Coco]

He says he's going for ballerina -- and keeping the beard. If Les Ballets Trockadero de Monte Carlo can do it, so can he.

Hahahahaha. I LOVE Trock.

[scoop22]

ds was sick a few months ago and we had him throw up in a bowl. less mess. dh volunteers at the firestation/ems. so when dh goes on a call he tells dh to take a bowl. he thinks that anyone who is sick needs a bowl.

[saschalicks]

When one of us says no to DS2 or takes something away his reaction to go to the other one to *tell on us*. He says to DH in a whiny voice "daddeeeee...mamaaaaaaaa" and then points at me like I'm the bad one. He's been doing this at day care too. Our day care is at a woman's house. She told me that she and the assistant were standing in the nursery and he threw a toy. She reprimanded him. He picked up the toy phone and said "mammmaaaaaaaaa...neena (what he calls her)". He was calling me to tell on her. She said it was so funny she had to leave the room so he wouldn't see her laughing. I just about died when I heard this.

[randomkid]

Just sitting here reading these and DD walked up to me and said "Mom, jingle bells suck" Took me a minute to realize that she meant "stuck". She can't pronounce the ST combo yet, so it always comes out "suck" I often hear "I suck" when I'm holding her tightly for a hug or to keep her from running away from me in the store! If she can't get away, she thinks she's stuck. Aren't they just so cute? I love reading threads like this one.

[MamaMolly]

DD is picking up a lot of words for a 15 month old. Over the holidays we were staying in a hotel and she and I shared a bath. I got out to dry my hair and she stayed in to play a while.

So as I'm drying my hair, DD is saying 'poop. poop. poop. poop.' over and over and whining. I thought she was whining about the dryer (she does this at home) but no, she was whining cause...you guessed it! Poop!

She stood up and launched a few torpedos into the tub. Removed baby from tub, removed poop from tub, cleaned the tub (God bless the inventor of hand sanitizer!!) and rewashed baby.

Turns out she really DOES know what poop means!

[ShanaMama]

Not sure if this qualifies as funny, but it made me proud. DD has the cutest rear end. A few days ago I said to her "I need to squeeze your tushie!" She says to me "No Mommy, it's private!" Go DD!! I guess my speeches are actually penetrating!

Lately, whenever DD sees me getting dressed/ putting on makeup, she gets this devastated face & says "I didn't get any lipstick." I usually give her a little chapstick or vitamin e stick.

This was really funny, but kinda old. A couple of months ago, when I was extremely exhausted & starving, I bought a box of mac'n'cheese, which turned out to be completely gross & inedible. DD refused to eat it, but pregnant me just kept wolfing it down. It was so gross I didn't even push her to eat more. Well, DD looks at me sweetly & says "Mommy, you eat the whooole thing bowl, I gonna be sooo proud of you!" I was ROFLOL!!

[JoyNChrist]

Not sure if this qualifies as funny, but it made me proud. DD has the cutest rear end. A few days ago I said to her "I need to squeeze your tushie!" She says to me "No Mommy, it's private!" Go DD!! I guess my speeches are actually penetrating!

Aw, that's so cute and so SMART! Good girl, and good mama for teaching her well!

[DDowning]

Just this past week on the way home from preschool the kids where bantering back and forth their first and last names. We've been prodding them to remember them in case they're ever separated from us. Anyway, I interjected "what's Daddy's name?" They, almost simultaneously, shot back DH's first name. I then asked asked "What's Mommy's name?"

Silence.

I asked again. After a few seconds, DS timidly says "Honey"?

I guess I need to get DH to use my real name more often!!! :D

[JoyNChrist]

I asked again. After a few seconds, DS timidly says "Honey"?

I guess I need to get DH to use my real name more often!!! :D

Hey, at least it was a nice word! :wink2:

[gatorruth]

Here's 2- one from each:
DD (who will be 2 in March) said, "Coco (her bro) funny guy!" It was so cute! She also says 'Oh my goodness' at the appropriate times... they pick so much stuff from us- scary!

DS (who is 4 1/2) said tonight as I was laying down with him before bed,"Mom, your breath smells old." Thanks, kid!! Love you, too!!

I keep a list on the fridge and add to it so I don't forget these cute words of wisdom!!

[saschalicks]

Just this past week on the way home from preschool the kids where bantering back and forth their first and last names. We've been prodding them to remember them in case they're ever separated from us. Anyway, I interjected "what's Daddy's name?" They, almost simultaneously, shot back DH's first name. I then asked asked "What's Mommy's name?"

Silence.

I asked again. After a few seconds, DS timidly says "Honey"?

I guess I need to get DH to use my real name more often!!! :D

When DS1 wants to get my attention he screams "HOOONNEEEYYY". It makes DH & I crack up laughing everytime. I wonder where he hears it. :ROTFLMAO: