MIL has breast cancer :( P &PT

[elektra]

I just found out this week that my mother-in-law has breast cancer. I know she has a good chance of being just fine after the treatment but it's all very scary. She has a mastectomy already scheduled, and is going in for more tests to see if the cancer has spread to any lymphnodes.
DH seemed really upset when I told him about the mastectomy ( I was the one to call him at work to tell him the news), whereas I was thinking that if it was me, I would definitely want the surgery.
This woman is awesome. She has raised 6 kids, all great people. You will never see a post from me about her in the Bitching Post, as she is the opposite of the stereotypical MIL. She is not up in our business at all. Afterall, she has 5 other kids besides DH! And her kids were really spread out (19 year difference between the oldest and youngest) so she has seen the tides turn in terms of what the "right" way to raise a child is. So she is never telling us what to do, as she knows that 10 years down the road the experts will change their minds again about the best way to feed/soothe/whatever your baby. She is just a caring and loving person, no strings attached.
So any types of prayers and positive thoughts would be wecome! Also, if anyone has a cancer survivor story to share I would love to hear it.

[Twoboos]

I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL. My mom has been battling breast cancer for 17 years and is on her 4th (5th?) recurrance now, so your MIL may have a long time left yet!

My mom did mainstream treatments (lumpectomies, chemo, radiation) but also did a lot of alternative treatments in conjuction. Accupuncture, herbs, reiki, macrobiotic diet. Some people think it's hokey, but I truly believe the combination of these has extended her life this much.

If your MIL is uncomfortable w/what her dr is saying, get a 2nd opinion. Go for the best drs in the area. after many years of being treated at a smaller, local hosp, they said there was a 95% chance that any further radiation would paralyze my mom (her cancer has spread to her spine). a 2nd opinion at the big city hospital said there was a 5% chance that further radiation would paralyze her. Guess which dr she's seeing now?

In the longer run, if MIL senses something is "off" don't stop pursuing it until she has an answer. When my mom's cancer first spread to her spine, her GP said the pain was due to her being out of shape and slightly overweight and needing phys therapy. Never checked for cancer, although breast to spine/bones is a common path for cancer. (Quack of a doctor.) Another dr/scan found the new tumors.

It is incredibly difficult and from now on any ache or pain will automatically bring the worry of "the cancer is back!" And the majority of the time, it's not. But we've gotten into a groove of "find it-treat it-move on" after so many years.

Good luck to your MIL, you, your DH and your whole family. Prayers and thoughts are with you all!!

[o_mom]

Lots of P&PT coming your way!

I'm sending you a PM - my mom is a 3 time BC survivor.

[elektra]

Thanks for the feedback. I am in total agreement with getting second opinions. Originally a tech saw a shadow or something on her mammogram, and told her she needed to get checked out further. So she went and saw a dr. (I don't think it was an oncologist, maybe just her gyno) and that dr. told her that it was nothing! I can't remember how long ago that was, but then she felt a lump about 2 weeks ago, and went in for the biopsy or lumpectomy, or whatever (I'm sure I'll get more familiar the with exact terminology unfortunately). And the results came back this week that it was cancer. So I'm upset that the dr. could have misdiagnosed her earlier.
After the initial shock and upsetness, I do feel really positive though.

Your mother must be incredibly strong to have been able to maintain that ongoing battle for so long. Positive thoughts to you too!

[tylersmama]

:praying: and sending lots of good thoughts your MIL's way...

[Mamma2004]

Praying for your MIL - she sounds like an amazing woman so there are surely lots of prayers and PTs on her behalf!

Stephanie