It's not funny, I can't talk

[niccig]

I posted about this earlier in the lounge, now I'm back to vent. I had complications with thyroid surgery and the vocal cord nerve was damaged. I can't talk above a hoarse whisper. And I'm a talker, I'm one of those people that babbles and sometimes I catch myself and stop, other times I don't. I do try to not talk so much.

Everyone who's heard what happened to my voice, laughs about it. Because it's sooo funny that me of all people can't talk. I can't read bed time stories to DS, it's not funny, so stop laughing.

[tylersmama]

:hug: That stinks! I can't even imagine how hard it must be. Sending you lots of healing thoughts! (And some shut up thoughts for everyone who thinks it's funny! :nono:)

[elliput]

:hug: :hug: :hug: I'm sorry, that really is awful. Next time somebody laughs at you kick them in the shin. :11:

[jal]

THAT IS NO LAUGHING MATTER!!!

The exact thing happened to my mother, but in her case the nerve damage left her vocal cord permanently paralized. The complications associated with that made for a lot of tough times and eventually help lead to a premature her death. Now she still died an old woman. But she could have easily lived another 10 years if her vocal cords were not parallized.

The paralized vocal cords made swallowing difficult (she had to learn to eat a whole new way to make sure she wasn't getting food into her lungs). Coughing was also a big problem. To cough, you close your vocal cords to allow pressure to build up that you suddenly release when you open your vocal cords. In her case, she couldn't close her vocal cords, so anything something got into her chest, she couldn't properly cough it up. If you want to get an idea of what that is like, try to cough as hard as you can, but don't do "that thing you do" in your neck to close off the lungs that lets you build up pressure.

niccig,
I hope and pray that your situation does not become as dire as it eventually became for my mother. I'm guessing that you are decades younger than my mother was, so I hope you have the energy of life to better fight with the difficulties this will cause. I also hope that things vastly improve for you more than they did for my mother. Things WILL get better. Even in her "worst case" situation, she learned to talk in a "strong" wisper.

But in any case, I know from experience that things like this are no laughing matter. Shame on anyone that laughs at you for ANY medical difficulty you (or any of us) face.

Now on the lighter side of things... one of the things my mom had to laugh at were the number of times in social circles, people would speak louder to her like she was deaf (like not being able to talk loud means you have a hearing problem).

[hellokitty]

I'm so sorry that ppl have reacted this way! I don't understand what would compel someone to laugh upon hearing about what happened from your thyroid surgery! :hug: I'm sorry you are going through this and hoping that you will gain back recovery of your voice. If I were you I'd carry around a pre-written notecard in response to when ppl react inappropriately and you can flash it at them to read it! It will make them shut up!

[sunriseiz]

I'm so sorry! My husband had the same thing happen after general anesthesia (sp). It was hard for him and he isn't a big talker. It took a long time and some voice therapy, but thankfully, he fully recovered. I hope you do also. I wish you the best!

Hugs,
Sunny

[Gena]

I'm sorry you've gotten that reaction. It's stupid, but sometimes people laugh when they don't know how to respond to a situation.

I'm sure your family and friends are truely concerned for you. Try not to let the stupid comments from the socially inept get under your skin.

I hope your speech therapy helps and your voice improves quickly.

[pb&j]

Why would anyone laugh about a serious complication like that? It's incredibly rude. I'm sorry that you're dealing with that kind of insensitivity on top of what must be a devastating injury to you. All day long I look forward to reading DS his bedtime story, and I know I'd be crushed if that little moment were taken from us. :( Hugs, and best wishes for a speedy recovery.

[elizabethkott]

I am so sorry. That is just horrible. Those people deserve some horrible karmic slap in the face. Poop on them.
Other than the horror show that is the state of your voice, how are you recovering from the surgery? Did everything go okay? Noticing any other adverse affects?
Here's to hoping you feel better soon - physically and vocally!

[niccig]

Thanks everyone.
Maybe I should carry a note card explaining that it's mean to poke fun at someone with a physical injury. And then I can ask what's funny about choking on food and not being able to take a full breath.

It's difficult to deal with, and I don't need people around me that thinks it's funny. Maybe I should kick them in the shins as someone suggested - it'll get my point across without straining my voice.

ETA - Liz, Other than feeling awful due to the general anesthetic, which took a 12 hours for me to stop being nauseous, I've been fine. I've been tired and I took full advantage of DH home all last week - I read, I slept, I watched TV and then ate Taco Bell for lunch - he tried, he did cook at other times. Now it's back to caring for DS, but modified, I'm still taking it easy and I won't do any cleaning for a while longer. I stocked up on dream dinners and easy meals, so I'm not even cooking.

[julieakc]

I'm so sorry - that is horrible that your "friends" would laugh about your situation. When I first read your post in the longue my heart went out to you because I can just imagine how difficult it would be to care for DS without being able to talk.

Remember you're just in the next town over so PM me if you run into a tight jam and need some help.

:hug:

[Aunt to sweet baby boy]

I am so sorry the surgery had complications. It must be so hard to care for your ds without being able to speak to him. Avi is always talking and always wanting a response, it would be hard if I was physically unable to respond to him. I hope you are taking it easy and not pushing yourself during this recovery process.

I think you mentioned that you were having the surgery at Cedars, so I am thinking you are near me. If you need anything please send me a PM.

[niccig]

Thanks Julie and Ilana. For the most part I'm doing fine, just very inconvenient when I need to talk - like at the grocery store and I can't find anything - I think I'm going to do home delivery for a little while.

[Aunt to sweet baby boy]

I just wanted to see how you are doing. Did you start the speech therapy yet? How is your ds doing with the signing?

I hope everything is improving, and continuing to go in a positive direction!

[August Mom]

Something similar happened to my grandmother after carotid artery surgery. It definitely is not a laughing matter. She had some steroid injections that helped somewhat. Good luck.