Nothing good you can say to a pregnant woman!

[sidmand]

Okay, I know there's pretty much not anything good you can say to a pregnant woman :D, and I know I didn't look pregnant for a long long time...

But I was wearing a pretty form fitting sweater and talking to someone (granted, she hadn't met me before), but now I have a pretty decent baby bump. Not really much else, but it's pretty obvious (I think!) that I'm pregnant. Maybe not 7 1/2 months, but...

And it came up that I was pregnant and due and April and she said, "I didn't even know you were pregnant!" So you think I always look like I have a huge bump for a stomach?

And all the people who told me I looked great was flattering in a way, but mainly meant they couldn't tell I was pregnant and I only looked great because I didn't look pregnant! Okay, petty I know, and if I was bigger and had people asking me if I was giving birth tomorrow, I'd probably be complaining about that.

Like I said, there's probably nothing good you can say to a pregnant woman!

[sarahsthreads]

Oh, I agree! This whole "you've got that glow" thing that everyone keeps telling me? What does that even mean?!? I'm probably just sweating because I feel kind of sick and I'm trying not to puke on you! :P

And when people tell me I don't even look pregnant yet (true, I'm only 17 weeks along, so it's not *that* obvious) it makes me feel even worse because that means I just look like I've been packing on the pounds. Sigh.

There's definitely nothing good you can say to a pregnant woman.

Sarah

[ellies mom]

Sure there is. You could try...

Sweetie, why don't you sit down and let me make dinner tonight/clean the house/etc.

Why don't you go take a nap and I'll take the kids out and run off some energy.

You know, I've been thinking, you should get that new stroller you've been eying even though we have an old stroller that still works.

But on your original topic, they really mean well. I'm in the same situation you are. And I can tell you, we (us pregnant ladies") can see our bumps long before anyone else. And depending on what we are wearing it can be really hard to tell. So, I just try and take it in the spirit it was given.

[sidmand]

I really do know that. I know most people totally mean well. And some of it is totally just hormones. I remember last time being upset that no one ever knew I was pregnant. I wished just one person would ask. But now I see that it can be a dangerous question because it isn't always obvious. And you don't want to ask someone who's NOT expecting when the baby is due, so it's better not to say anything!

And yes, it totally depends what I'm wearing. And DH has pointed out that I usually wear very big clothes anyway (which I knew!). And like you said, I could tell way earlier than anyone else that there was a bump there, but even he thought it was pretty obvious now. Ah well. I know nothing bad was meant. It's just getting a bit frustrating! Although I remember someone asking what was new THE DAY BEFORE I was going to be induced last time. I said, "well, I'm having a baby tomorrow." and he said, "really, I didn't know you were pregnant." Okay, at that point I had gained 50 lbs and looked huge!

DH has been really good too and keeps telling me to sit down and relax and I'm just not good at that. It's true, I feel guilty when someone says something nice and wants to help out. I've got to get over that. Especially once #2 comes!

[katydid1971]

I was just having a conversation with Dh the other day about this because of something he said (now I can't remember what it was) but I told him because I'm "crazy pregnant lady" (my new nick name) that any answer he gave me would be wrong and to just keep his mouth shut. He should know by the third time around you can't say anything to a pregnant lady without pissing them off. ;)

[rupptopia]

I hear ya!
I went to the Chicago auto show today (37 1/2 weeks prego) and I got comments ALL day long! Some highlights:
- "should you even be walking?! are you gonna drop tomorrow?"
- "wow, you're big" (master of the obvious)
- "oh, your baby bump is so cute & all up front, you can't even tell you're pregnant from behind" (OK, I liked that one but still odd to think the Lexus lady was checking out my rear end)
- "you don't know? well you're carrying high so it is a boy for sure"
- "yep, definitely a girl in there"
- "you ready? yes? well you know how to speed that along, do the same thing you did to get that way - you should be hanging from the chandelier tonight!" (pardon me?! now was that really necessary to say while ringing up our lunch, in front of a long line of people?!)

At that point I really, really wanted to come up with a smart answer how I "got this way" involving clomid & and an IUI in the obgyn's office but decided that wouldn't have been very appropriate either! :)

[dr mom]

My (least) favorite: "Oh my gosh you're huge, are you sure it isn't twins?"

Of course I'm big, I'm 37 weeks pregnant you moron. With ONE BABY. But thanks so much for stroking my ego.
And yes, I'm absolutely positive it's not twins...I think we would probably have noticed that second fetus on the ultrasound, don't you?

[klwa]

:) I ran into my old roommate from college when I was 7-8 months along with DS. We worked at the same place at the time, so we'd see each other every couple of weeks. She came up & asked me THEN if I was pregnant. I laughed & said, Yeah, what, did you just think I was getting fat? She then told me, "Well. It could be...." Wasn't kidding. Serious as a heart attack. And, trust me, I was pretty much "all baby".