Shut UP Mrs. Jones!

[elizabethkott]

After the long President's Day weekend spent up at Mrs. Jones' parent's ski condo with two other couples (we were invited but had thankfully made prior plans with another couple for that weekend) Mrs. Jones calls me.
"So did you hear?"
Hear what?
"About Sara?"
Um, no.
"Well she told us all over the weekend!"
(Um, did you *forget* that we weren't with you?)
What?
"Oh, maybe I shouldn't say...
SHE'S PREGNANT AGAIN!!!!!"

Now, why would you deprive someone from telling a friend that they're pregnant? And why would you preface it with "maybe I shouldn't say...." and then SAY IT?

"So... what do you think?"
Think? I think it's great for them.
"Don't you think it's a little soon?"
(Sara and DH had had their first in May '07)
No, since she wanted to have children close together and right away.
"Are you guys trying?"

WTF?!?!?!?!?! First of all, WAAAAAAAAY personal question to kamikazi in there. Second of all, transition from one topic to the next - hear of it much? Thirdly, NONE OF YOUR F'IN BUSINESS!

Why do you ask?
"Well, because you guys are looking for a bigger house."
The two things have nothing to do with one another.
"Oh. Because your house is really small. So you're not trying yet?"

So now you've managed to insult my home by calling it small and STILL try to fish for information in the same breath.
Un. Be. Leave. Able.

Is anyone out there a lawyer? How many years would I get? Or could this be considered self-defense, or justifiable homicide?

Who wants to bet Mrs. Jones is now starting on her DH to have another baby as well? DH is of the opinion that they'll wait until we DO start trying or actually get pg again to try... won't that be FUN?! YAY! Yippie Skippie!

Sigh. Always glad to contribute to everyone else's entertainment value.

[LarsMal]

Okay, Liz, it's called CALLER-ID!!!! Or, just get a new number- although then we wouldn't get to hear all the good stories!

You need to tell her she'll be the first to know when you start "trying" again. Like the FIRST to know- right after- even if it's middle of the night sex.

"Hey, Mrs. Jones, just wanted to let you know we're trying, and MAN, was it a GOOOOOD try!!!!" :rolleye0014:

[maestramommy]

:hysterical:



Okay, Liz, it's called CALLER-ID!!!! Or, just get a new number- although then we wouldn't get to hear all the good stories!

You need to tell her she'll be the first to know when you start "trying" again. Like the FIRST to know- right after- even if it's middle of the night sex.

"Hey, Mrs. Jones, just wanted to let you know we're trying, and MAN, was it a GOOOOOD try!!!!" :rolleye0014:

[tylersmama]

:hysterical:

[hellokitty]

You know, I know someone who is a lot like this. She would be nosy and insulting all at the same time, and have no clue that she was doing anything wrong. Her biggest thing was CONSTANTLY asking if I was pregnant again. At least once a wk she'd ask me, "so are you pregnant?" I finally got sick of it and said, "no, I'm just fat" and that finally shut her up. I know she did not mean it that way (that I'm fat), but she is just one of those ppl who always gossips about other ppl and wants to be, "the first to know" so she can spread it around. She used to live in our neighborhood and would know ALL the dirt on everyone. Here I thought that she was friends with these other ppl, it turns out she didn't even know them at all, but somehow knew all the gossip. Funny enough she gets annoyed when ppl are nosy with her, but seems to think it is ok if she is nosy about other ppl. It's funny that mrs jones asked, "so what do you think?" The friend I speak of is the same way, like she wants to hear what *I* think first before sharing her opinion. She started ttc as soon as she found out that we were ttc, and would pretty much copy whatever we were doing. I was trying to figure out how to end the friendship when she finally moved out of state. Thank god! I think she and your mrs. jones could be cousins or something.

[Twoboos]

What is wrong with people????? I would have not an ounce of patience for any such thing.

I think you should tell her you ARE trying (especially if you're not), and then see how fast they start trying. Then say - goodness, why on earth are you doing that now?

[ThreeofUs]

Okay, Liz, it's called CALLER-ID!!!! Or, just get a new number- although then we wouldn't get to hear all the good stories!

You need to tell her she'll be the first to know when you start "trying" again. Like the FIRST to know- right after- even if it's middle of the night sex.

"Hey, Mrs. Jones, just wanted to let you know we're trying, and MAN, was it a GOOOOOD try!!!!"



BWAHAHAHAHAHA

ROTFL

Oh, man, I needed a good laugh and this was IT!

[LarsMal]

BWAHAHAHAHAHA

ROTFL

Oh, man, I needed a good laugh and this was IT!

*I* made a funny?!?! SWEEET! Glad I could help! :)

[egfmba]

I agree with Twoboos. Tell her you're trying again and then sit back and watch the fun begin. She'll invariably come to you with some sad story about how they really can't afford another one but they're trying anyway. Or she'll complain about how much work 2 kids is and wonder why you've got it so easy.

On second thought, she'll probably start telling people that you can't conceive if she thinks you're trying and then you don't get pregnant. So, unless you want to go to the trouble of pretending you're pregnant just to keep her on the line, nix that.

Good luck with her either way!

eva

[katydid1971]

When DH and I were first married and not ready to have DCs yet and people would ask I would say, "Yes were trying and not having any luck." It would shut them up fast and they would stop asking. I don't care if people believe things about me that aren't true because I know they aren't true. Let her think you and Dh are going to expensive fertility treatments etc and watch how long it will take her to start her own fertitly treatments :)

[AngelaS]

ROTFL!

When people would hound us about having a second child, I'd just say, "Well we're havin' sex twice a day, but so far, no baby." :P Busybodies annoy me!

[maylips]

We were married 12 years before we had our first child and often shared annoying "when are you having kids" questions with another couple who were also long-time married with no kids.

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"

THAT shut people up.

[bubbaray]

We were married 12 years before we had our first child and often shared annoying "when are you having kids" questions with another couple who were also long-time married with no kids.

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"

THAT shut people up.


:hysterical:
:hysterical:
:hysterical:

[MamaMolly]

:ROTFLMAO:

There are too many funnies to quote! This is the funniest thread EVER!

I always perk up at a Jones's thread, this one takes the cake.

:ROTFLMAO:

[gatorsmom]

Oh, no, what you have to do is First tell her yes, you are trying to conceive. Then let a couple of months go by. Then, when she brings it up again, say, "no, I never said that. We are definitely not trying to conceive! Oh, YOU are? Why? I mean, aren't you in debt as it is?" ok, if that last part about the debt is a little too naughty, then maybe just play with her head a little. That could be fun.

[LarsMal]

We were married 12 years before we had our first child and often shared annoying "when are you having kids" questions with another couple who were also long-time married with no kids.

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"

THAT shut people up.

OMG- that is the FUNNIEST thing I've ever heard!!!!!

:ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:

[Melanie]

Oh, no, what you have to do is First tell her yes, you are trying to conceive. Then let a couple of months go by. Then, when she brings it up again, say, "no, I never said that. We are definitely not trying to conceive! Oh, YOU are? Why? I mean, aren't you in debt as it is?" ok, if that last part about the debt is a little too naughty, then maybe just play with her head a little. That could be fun.

Oh yes! Love it!

That sucks that she 'stole your friends thunder' on the PG announcement. That's not her news to share!

[ha98ed14]

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"



THAT is an awesome line! I applaud anyone with b*lls enough to say it straight-faced!

[candybomiller]

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"


OH. MY. GOD.

You win for funniest line EVER on this board.

[jal]

...Always glad to contribute to everyone else's entertainment value.

Nailed that one.

[mudder17]

:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: Oh my stomach!

[kozachka]

Thanks for the laughs, ladies :).

[elizabethkott]

Oh yes! Love it!

That sucks that she 'stole your friends thunder' on the PG announcement. That's not her news to share!

This is really the main point of my b*tch. What kind of a person are you to just spread someone else's pregnancy news? She's such a swooper. You know, those people who swoop in and steal thunder?
Swooping copycat.
I do really like the f'ing up the butt statements, however.
Who knows? Maybe if she thinks *we're* doing it...
"Honey, guess what Liz and Dave are doing? Wanna try?"
:D

[Puddy73]

We were married 12 years before we had our first child and often shared annoying "when are you having kids" questions with another couple who were also long-time married with no kids.

His response to people who asked that question? "well, I keep f'ing her up the butt but nothing has happened so far. Any suggestions?"

THAT shut people up.

It's a good thing that my office door is closed because I just laughed out loud and spit Diet Coke on my desk. Oh, to be a fly on the wall when your DH used that line . . .

[caleymama]

This is really the main point of my b*tch. What kind of a person are you to just spread someone else's pregnancy news? She's such a swooper. You know, those people who swoop in and steal thunder?
Swooping copycat.
I do really like the f'ing up the butt statements, however.
Who knows? Maybe if she thinks *we're* doing it...
"Honey, guess what Liz and Dave are doing? Wanna try?"
:D

OMG :hysterical: