Wedding gift ?

[buddyleebaby]

My cousin is getting married and instead of registering for gifts has asked that money be donated to one of two charities.
Would you go with the donation or just give her a check to either spend or donate as she sees fit?

[AmyZ]

I would make the donation in honor of your cousin.

When DD2 was born, we encouraged as many people as possible to make charity donations instead of giving toys etc... I really appreciated it when people actually did what I asked.

[MamaMolly]

This is such a nice idea! I'd happily donate to her chosen charity. She will likely get a card that says a donation was made in her name from person XYZ. I really like the idea of a gift that doesn't clutter up your house and also helps people (or critters, or whatever). I don't know about anyone else, but we get very little use out of our wedding gifts.

[Kungjo]

I would donate to her chosen charity as well. WHat a lovely thing for her to do.

[wellyes]

Definitely give to the couples' preselected charity. I've seen this once or twice, both times from rather prosperous, older couples who don't want "stuff" and don't want money from family & friends.


I don't know about anyone else, but we get very little use out of our wedding gifts.

Some stuff I used, some I didn't, the cash was nice but not critical. In retrospect, I wish I'd thought of the charity idea. In the years since getting married our charity donations have definitely exceeded our wedding gift $$ and that pleases me.

[fortato]

I would make the donation....

As long as it's not for the "Human Fund...Money for People". That one is shady.

[JillSP]

I would give to one of the selected charities as long as the charity's mission was not in conflict with my values. In that case, I'd probably just give them a check to spend as they saw fit.

I might consider giving a donation to another charity in honor of the couple, but it would depend on the couple and how I thought they would react. I'm not giving money to an organization I don't support, but I'm also not going to make a donation to an organization in honor of the couple if I thought they would be offended by it.

[MontrealMum]

Assuming that the chosen charities are reputable, I would go ahead and do that. My cousin (who I don't know very well) did this a few years back when she got married, because she and her DH were a little older, already had lots of "stuff", and were both making extremely good salaries. I also think that since many of the friends/family were not as well off as they are, they felt a bit bad *causing* (by virture of the wedding) people to buy them gifts. The charitable donation seemed like a very nice compromise to me. If your cousin and fiance are also fairly well off I think that giving them a check would defeat the goal that they are trying to achieve with the charity suggestion. So, if you're against their chosen charities for whatever reason, I'd pick another, rather then give the couple money.