Do you ever feel like...

[DrSally]

Your just constantly cleaning up after everyone. I just read that having a husband adds 7 hours of housework for a wife. I can tell the difference when DH is working from home. It's even worse when your preggo and sick.

[gatorsmom]

Yep. Constantly. all the time. It's what my life is about. sigh.

[wencit]

Yes. I clean up one area of the house, it gets messed up within the hour. DH is almost as bad as DS -- dirty dishes & cups everywhere, dirty socks, all his JUNK just lying around wherever he throws it. Why do I even bother cleaning? I am so SICK OF IT!!!

[Emmas Mom]

Yes. I clean up one area of the house, it gets messed up within the hour. DH is almost as bad as DS -- dirty dishes & cups everywhere, dirty socks, all his JUNK just lying around wherever he throws it. Why do I even bother cleaning? I am so SICK OF IT!!!

:yeahthat: In fact I was so fed up that a few days ago I sat down with DH & we discussed how I was having issues with how much I do & how little help he is. I thought it got through but as of two hours ago he still has a couple days worth of shirts & shoes laying around downstairs. I said it before today & I'll say it again. MEN!

[MontrealMum]

I just read that having a husband adds 7 hours of housework for a wife. I completely believe it! No matter what I do, he's just never going to learn to see dirt, or dust, or mess. I have dreams of a house with tons of closets that I can shove his stuff into and lock away, but down deep I know that won't work :(

[ellies mom]

Tell me about it. I really want to have this house clean before we have the baby but that nesting energy just doesn't seem to be showing up and I'm sick of having to do it all by myself and the fact that he can't even help maintain it once it is clean is making me crazy. So finally today, I decided that I just wasn't going to worry about it. Whatever gets done gets done and whatever doesn't will be waiting for me after I recover from my c-section. It isn't like it is going anywhere.

[DrSally]

I'm glad I'm not the only one (in some ways). It feels so frustrating when you also have a chlid to care for and don't have the energy. Then, you feel like you're nagging when you have to ask for simple things to be done (wipe your crumbs off the table)...Well why do I even have to ask, it's not like I like asking...

[AngelaS]

Um, yeah.....

[wellyes]

I really want to have this house clean before we have the baby but that nesting energy just doesn't seem to be showing up and I'm sick of having to do it all by myself and the fact that he can't even help maintain it once it is clean is making me crazy. So finally today, I decided that I just wasn't going to worry about it. W

Tell me about it. I kept waiting for the nesting - never showed up. Instead of "clean house for baby" I got "watch bad TV and doze off". Our solution? Cleaning lady. Having the house deep cleaned a week or two before baby was born was a HUGE burden off me. DH didn't care either way of course..........

[trales]

When DH works from home I wish I could go on vacation. How hard is it to put your dishes in the dishwasher or at least in the sink, do they need to stay in your office. No shoes in the house means no shoes, not just when you are coming in for awhile. Argggg.

[kozachka]

Definitely. And no amount of nagging seems to help.

[elephantmeg]

yes, it is horrible. The worst days are mondays after my weekend off. It is truly terrible.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I am not a naturally neat person so I have to clean up after myself plus dh. If one of us were remotely neat then life would be so much easier. I always get torn on complaining though b/c he does so many big projects around the house. Still, I would like help with day to day stuff!

Beth

[KrisM]

My house is much messier on Monday morning than any other day because DH does nothing over the weekend to help clean, but manages to add to the mess while he's here.

He keeps telling me I'll have to cut back on what I'm doing so I'm not so tired all the time. Cut back on grocery shopping, etc. is what he means. Has he offered to do it for me yet? No. But, he did tell me he needed more underwear a week or so ago and asked me to get some for him. Hmmm.

[Laurel]

I hate this, but I can't nag because DH does all the cooking and about 45% of the scrubbing-type cleaning.

It makes me so mad though that he can't seem to find the laundry basket, diaper pail, trash can, etc.!!!!

[ritacheetah]

I definitely have my days like that! If my DH didn't work so much I'm sure it would be much worse. But my IL's will be here in a few weeks and they are slobs so that will be fun...

One thing that has helped us in the past is instead of nagging or telling over and over, try to come up with a humerous way to let them know. Like once, back in the day when DH used to vacuum once a week (before kids), he piled all my shoes on the step and left a note on them that said "pile shoes here." Then when he left his wet towel draped over the laundry basket I left a note that said "Bob's mildew factory." It works for awhile but at least they kind of notice it, not like constant nagging.

Not sure what to do about the IL's, I think they've always been slobs.

Good luck...

[niccig]

Same store here. I used to be as bad as DH and we would do a big clean up on the weekends. Well, now we have DS, so I've changed and I clean up after myself. DH is still bad, but 2 things have helped him improve. 1. breaking expensive digital camera because it was left out for over a week 2. DS pouring soda over another expensive item - soda can had sat there overnight. I'm still picking up things and I need to get the house back into some sort of order, then it seems to stay that way more easily.

[DrSally]

DH does nothing over the weekend to help clean, but manages to add to the mess while he's here.


Exactly!......

[salsah]

yes. it is exhausting.

not only does dh not clean up after himself but he actually does not know how. and he is a slob who is dirt-blind and has no common sense when it comes to these things. my 3 yr old is better than he is!

i blame it on his parents. his family is actually worse than he is.

[almostmom]

Sorry you're feeling this way--

In my house, I'm the messiest. And it drives DH crazy. Do I like it messy? No, but I just don't care every day. That being said, the things that have helped are when he points out individual things that I do that get to him, like when I peel carrots in the sink, and don't clean it out (we don't have a disposal), or leave my clothes in the bathroom after my shower, or drop my and the kids stuff right in the front hall when we come home at the end of a weekday. When I have one thing to focus on, I can usually change that behavior when I put my mind to it, and feel good about not adding to the mess. But it is a tough slow process. I do love my house when it's cleaned up, it just never seems to last. DH would say it could last longer if I didn't put everything down just anywhere and that is some thing I'm working on. One more thing - I read this quote a few years ago, and it really stuck with me -- Clutter is just delayed decision. Much of the time, I want to delay the decision! But it's good to recognize, and realize that I'll have to decide sometime, why not now?