How to get DD to eat?

[KrisM]

DD barely eats. I know that kids cycle through eating and not eating, but she's normally in not eating. She drinks a lot of milk and I think that gets in the way of eating real food. I've tried limiting milk, but that doesn't work, as she still doesn't eat and then she's very cranky. When she does eat, she's pretty picky and has never been a fan of trying new things. I keep offering food and she keeps ignoring it.

Any ideas?

[egoldber]

How much milk does she drink? If you cut back on milk it may take her a few days to figure it out and decide to eat more. As long as you offer her plenty of water, then I wouldn't worry about it taking up to a week to adjust. Also to limit milk, it may be easier to just switch to a smaller cup than to offer less or less frequently.

But there really is a limited amount to what you can do. You can offer foods (and you need to continue to offer them many, many, many times, not just once or twice) but that's it. You simply cannot make a child eat. My oldest DD is a very, very, very, very picky eater. A lot of people roll their eyes at me and her, but I cannot make her eat. Once I recognized and accepted that, my life became less stressful.

[karstmama]

i like the book 'child of mine - feeding with love and good sense' by ellyn satter.

lots of luck! your job to provide, hers to eat or not.

[KrisM]

I haven't measured her milk intake lately. I would estimate 8-12 oz about 4 times a day though. She occassionally drinks juice and then will have less milk.

Today, she got up about 5:30. She wouldn't eat breakfast at all or even drink the milk (in a regular cup). She did get some milk about 9:00 and drank about 8 oz (sippy cup). She did just eat 1/2 a grilled cheese sandwich and 1/4 cheese stick - big lunch for her!

She is so picky, that I am worried about her lack of types of food - very few veggies and fruits. Likes dairy and chicken.

Thanks for the replies. I will say she's growing a ton - she's about 30lbs and in a 2T now. At her 1 year last June, she was under 18lbs and in 6-9 months! So, she's getting it from somewhere, I guess.

[WatchingThemGrow]

I agree w/PP about Child Of Mine by Ellyn Satter. EXCELLENT advice to grow with through adolescence.

Our ped says about 20 oz. of dairy per day (for DD who is basically the same age of yours). We do a full sippy at waking and before bed and a 1/2 (4 oz) after naptime. Water with meals.

Satter says that toddlers will sometimes just go without eating and that it is completely normal. Freaks me out when it happens. Some things that have worked for us (not that it has been that much of a problem) are new/different utensils from the drawer, a change in plates, bowls, placemats, chairs, booster, position at the table, etc. We try to make sure she's at a comfortable height(love our craigslist stokke chairs), with easy to use utensils, with a variety of foods available. As the book recommends, you decide the when and what of feeding and they decide how much and whether. I think I said it like she does. Anyway, it puts my mind at ease if I've done my "job."

[karstmama]

every baby's different & i'm in no way ragging on you - wow! what a lot of milk! i'm thrilled if my former preemie gets his 16oz a day without too much hassle - i think i'm jealous of your child's milk intake! then again, my ds eats table food like crazy...except this week. i think he's hitting that toddler sudden intake slowdown. and he can't even toddle! he did start commando crawling today, though.

[tylersmama]

If you find something that works, PLEASE let me know! I'm in the same boat here, although I don't think DS overdoes it with milk. He probably drinks 2-3 sippy cups of milk a day, so no more than 30 oz. He is a complete and total carb addict, though, and in general will not try new things at all. That means his list of foods that he will eat is pretty much limited to: cheerios, waffles, pancakes, french toast (really any kind of bread for the most part), chicken nuggets, quesadillas, hot dogs, and sometimes pizza. Oh yeah, and FRIES (can't even mention the word...he hears it and is instantly obsessed and yells it over and over until he gets some!) He loves his snacks...cheddar bunnies, graham crackers, animal crackers, etc. The only fruits and vegetables I can get the kid to eat are raisins, craisins, and occasionally some edamame. It's SO frustrating. I try to keep offering things, but I get tired of having to throw out untouched food (or then I eat it so I don't waste it, which isn't good for ME). I was so excited today at Costco because they were sampling chicken salad sandwiches, and the kid actually ate it! I did figure out that he'll eat sweet potato fries, so at least that's kind of a vegetable. :rolleye0014:

I SWORE I would never have THAT kid, that my child would eat and like a wide variety of foods, but like Beth said, you just can't make a child eat. It's SO frustrating! :banghead:

[KrisM]

I agree w/PP about Child Of Mine by Ellyn Satter. EXCELLENT advice to grow with through adolescence.

Our ped says about 20 oz. of dairy per day (for DD who is basically the same age of yours). We do a full sippy at waking and before bed and a 1/2 (4 oz) after naptime. Water with meals.

Satter says that toddlers will sometimes just go without eating and that it is completely normal. Freaks me out when it happens. Some things that have worked for us (not that it has been that much of a problem) are new/different utensils from the drawer, a change in plates, bowls, placemats, chairs, booster, position at the table, etc. We try to make sure she's at a comfortable height(love our craigslist stokke chairs), with easy to use utensils, with a variety of foods available. As the book recommends, you decide the when and what of feeding and they decide how much and whether. I think I said it like she does. Anyway, it puts my mind at ease if I've done my "job."

I do have that book, but forgot that I had it. I'll dig it out tonight.

She does eat cheese and yogurt. How many ounces of cheese is an ounce of milk (weight vs. fluid)? Just wondering how to calculate "ounces of dairy". I'm going to keep track tomorrow and see if I'm close or not.

She does drink water and I didn't count that in how much fluid she gets. I may be completely off in my estimate!

[salsah]

we had that problem (and still do -- although it is better now). i finally just accepted that at her age, if she is hungry she will eat and if she isn't hungry then she will not eat. i found that when i stopped offering, she was more inclined to eat. i would just start eating whatever i prepared for her without offering her any and when she saw me eating it, she would tell me that she wants some too. my dd is a social eater. when she was younger, she ate better if we all ate together and ate the same foods (she wouldn't eat anything that we were not eating). now she eats well if she is sitting at a table with other children eating.

she usually eats the most in the morning so i focus on breakfast and let her snack for lunch and dinner. i heard that it isn't uncommon for toddlers to eat only one meal per day -- one really big meal and just nibble at the other two meals. i usually leave out a plate of veggies and/or fruit. if she sees it ready on the table, she is more likely to eat it than if she has to ask or if i offer. sometimes she'll just grab one cucumber stick and other times she will eat the entire plate.

as long as she is energetic and growing, don't worry about it.