Please tell me there is hope for a 34 year old single mom of 2..

[shelikesmorningglories]

This isn't really a bitch;I'm just heartbroken.I am a divorced mom of two great kids.Last year at my old job I developed feelings for an unmarried 32 year old sans kids.Through a series of coincidences,I ended up revealing my feelings to him.He was pleasant but clearly not into me.I left the job eight months ago and found out this past weekend that he is now dating another coworker.She is pretty,has a degree(I don't),is thin..and 23.I feel so old:(Please tell me there is some hope and that next guy I like might be into someone like me...

[Oak]

I am a 32 year old happily married guy. And I believe that there is hope out there for you. Maybe you need to consider where and when you will meet the next guy. The key is getting out there. However, I would avoid meeting other coworkers. That could be a disaster, and I would also avoid married men. That being said, think about where you could meet someone. If you like books, go to a bookstore. If you like insulation, go to Home Depot.

I would suggest that you let the guy know up front, though. It might take just the right guy, and I would consider a slightly older one, or a widower/divorcee. Get involved in your community. Don't focus on the fact that you are alone. Focus on the fact that you are awesome and have a lot to offer.

But whatever you do, remember, the kids come first!!!

[tarabenet]

Thirty-two is definitely *not* old. But it is old enought that you have no excuse for not making your experience work for you. By that I mean don't waste your energy on guys who are definitely not right. You are *not* desperate and don't forget that.

I once read somewhere that you should make a list of the top 6-8 things that are most important to you in a partner. According that book, if you found someone who lived up to at least half, they were keepers. I disagree. Don't settle for half. But make sure whatever is on your list is truly make-or-break-it important.

After a heartbreaking split from a man I truly thought was right for me, I came up with my list (ten things on mine) and every single morning I rewrote my list on a 3X5 card. Every morning. Why? To keep myself focused on what I really needed in a partner, to keep myself from going off-track and getting wrapped up with a guy who wasn't a good match. I was willing to "settle for half" as advised. But you know what? I ended up with a man who matched everything on my list and a lot of othr things that I wished for but that didn't make the list. I truly believe it had to do with not letting myself forget my priorities, as well as with focusing on what I wanted to attract into my life.

There are very good people in the world. Many of them are men. Don't worry about that! Focus on what you and your kids really need in your world and on being your very best self. Focus on your kids and your work and the hobbies and interests that make you happy. Then stay open to the world and the amazing way that things can work out. And one other thing: be open to meeting guys suggested by friends and family who know and love you!

I know I sound corny. But I know it works. It took me a long time to find my soulmate, but now I know for sure that ther are such things as soulmates! I met mine 9 years ago.

[ChunkyNicksChunkyMom]

Okay, I will let you in on a little secret, I met my DH through a personal ad. BUT before that I belonged to a fantastic dating service. I was in full on career mode and did not have time to sort through losers on my own. Outside of one guy who could not decide if he was into men or women, I met so many successful men who were in like situations, plus they were already aware of my circumstances. Worth a try........

[blisstwins]

I cannot tell you how many of my friends use on-line dating services. I think once you are mature enough to get out of the club/bar singles scene--because of children or age--this is an excellent option.

[nfowife]

There is lots of hope for you! Stop wasting time thinking about that guy from your old job. He was not "the one" for you. Chin up and think about your goal (find your "the one"). Then think of the steps you need to take to achieve it... how about match.com or eharmony? The good things about these types of services is that you can put up-front what your situation is (that you have kids) so that you can weed out the men from the boys!
You deserve it and it will come to you!

[JTsMom]

I fourth? fifth? whatever we're up to- online dating services. I met my DH online (just through a chat board though, not a dating service), my sister met her DH online, and about 5 other friends did as well. I think it really ups the odds you'll find a good match b/c it's easy, and you cut the crap. LOL What did I care what some random guy thought of me? I didn't, so I wasn't playing any games when I talked to him. He knew the real me, and I knew the real him, before we ever even met. Talking online really makes you focus on what the person says, and you aren't distracted by some little quirk the other person has.

There's ALWAYS hope, I promise! :)