Melaine
06-09-2008, 08:15 PM
*deep breath*
This may be a long drawn out question, but please read it and give me some input! I am new here, and my DH and I are first time parents to 19 month old twin girls. The last couple years have been, well, exhausting. I know this is normal for twins. Recently I was talking to someone whose child had some kind of sensory development disorder *or something to that effect*. I don't know anything about it, so please advise:
My girls have been HIGHLY sensitive since birth. Any change to their routine would kind of freak them out. They had colic, I guess; basically ALWAYS fussy and often inconsolablely so. (extreme reflux too). We didn't take them anywhere, because when we did they would just freak out, as in scream and never calm down. They would have what I would call a normal response to strangers and strange situations, but never return to a calm state, instead escalating into a fit of crying and we would have to leave. They would go from 0-60 in five seconds. Everything just seemed particularly difficult for them; the words "sensitive", "high maintenance", "moody", "unpredictable", "extreme" come to mind. As a first time mom, I wasn't sure what to make of this, but I felt strongly that it wasn't normal. My mom has four kids and she said it definitely didn't seem normal. I had concerns about possible autism...just didn't know anything about it and frankly was just trying to survive and keep them somewhat content on a daily basis.
Now as I look at them at 19 months old, things have drastically improved. We can go out in public, although there is still the chance they will get overwhelmed or scared and start crying. Usually they can be calmed without actually leaving now. Developmentally they are doing great, and I have sort of abandoned the idea of autism. Dr. says they are normal and they seem to be to me. They are affectionate, playful, like to read books and have a fairly extensive toddler vocabulary. However, there are still strange things: the intense mood swings that I am usually completely helpless to alleviate, the extreme fear for things as small as a fly, whining that just doesn't stop, complete meltdown fits when I try to give them a bath in a different place (Grandma's house which they are familiar with). None of my friends with children can remotely relate to these issues.
So my mother keeps encouraging me to seek answers; she worked with developmentally disabled kids but that was over 25 years ago. She seems to think perhaps there is some kind of mild issue that the girls are dealing with. I would love to know how I should respond to them. For instance, DD will be upset when she gets dirt on her hands. Should I take her to wash or just teach her to brush it off or should I encourage her to dip her hands in the dirt like get a sand box?
I'm sorry this post is so long and disjointed. Any help is MUCH appreciated, you guys have a lot of collective wisdom out there!
This may be a long drawn out question, but please read it and give me some input! I am new here, and my DH and I are first time parents to 19 month old twin girls. The last couple years have been, well, exhausting. I know this is normal for twins. Recently I was talking to someone whose child had some kind of sensory development disorder *or something to that effect*. I don't know anything about it, so please advise:
My girls have been HIGHLY sensitive since birth. Any change to their routine would kind of freak them out. They had colic, I guess; basically ALWAYS fussy and often inconsolablely so. (extreme reflux too). We didn't take them anywhere, because when we did they would just freak out, as in scream and never calm down. They would have what I would call a normal response to strangers and strange situations, but never return to a calm state, instead escalating into a fit of crying and we would have to leave. They would go from 0-60 in five seconds. Everything just seemed particularly difficult for them; the words "sensitive", "high maintenance", "moody", "unpredictable", "extreme" come to mind. As a first time mom, I wasn't sure what to make of this, but I felt strongly that it wasn't normal. My mom has four kids and she said it definitely didn't seem normal. I had concerns about possible autism...just didn't know anything about it and frankly was just trying to survive and keep them somewhat content on a daily basis.
Now as I look at them at 19 months old, things have drastically improved. We can go out in public, although there is still the chance they will get overwhelmed or scared and start crying. Usually they can be calmed without actually leaving now. Developmentally they are doing great, and I have sort of abandoned the idea of autism. Dr. says they are normal and they seem to be to me. They are affectionate, playful, like to read books and have a fairly extensive toddler vocabulary. However, there are still strange things: the intense mood swings that I am usually completely helpless to alleviate, the extreme fear for things as small as a fly, whining that just doesn't stop, complete meltdown fits when I try to give them a bath in a different place (Grandma's house which they are familiar with). None of my friends with children can remotely relate to these issues.
So my mother keeps encouraging me to seek answers; she worked with developmentally disabled kids but that was over 25 years ago. She seems to think perhaps there is some kind of mild issue that the girls are dealing with. I would love to know how I should respond to them. For instance, DD will be upset when she gets dirt on her hands. Should I take her to wash or just teach her to brush it off or should I encourage her to dip her hands in the dirt like get a sand box?
I'm sorry this post is so long and disjointed. Any help is MUCH appreciated, you guys have a lot of collective wisdom out there!