Feeling burnt out...how to recharge?

[firstbaby]

I am just burnt out. There, I said it. Between working FT from home, tackling all of the household responsibilities, spending quality time with the kids, doing meals, shopping, errands, activities for the kids, etc, it is a lot. We do have a great nanny that takes great care of the kids, so at least I don't have to balance working and caring for the kids at the *same* time. To be honest, I usually love controlling chaos :) DH could do more around the house, but he is under a lot of stress at work right now and I don't want to pull him in too many directions.

How often and how do you recharge? I am a faithful runner but even lately I haven't enjoyed my longer runs - it just feels like something else I have to do. But, I can't stop because I don't want to lose what I have worked hard for. I also enjoy crafting but finding the time / energy once work is done and the kids are in bed is a challenge. I am feeling so guilty because I just want a break so bad! And I don't think a couple of hours by myself just for myself would be enough. Anyone else BTDT and could give some advice?

For the record, I am pretty sure I am not depressed. I think it is just burn out and trying to figure out how to recharge a bit...

[SAHMIL]

My suggestion would be to do something that's a girls' night out type of thing or a girls' get together on a regular basis. It could be something as simple as having lunch, coffee, or breakfast with some girlfriends once a month. You could do a scrapbook night. (another good excuse to get together and chat) You could see if there's a local nail salon or something that will let you guys rent it out and you could all get manis and pedis. Or you could get a Mary Kay consultant and have a spa night at someone's house. Or even do an overnight somewhere. It would be kind of fun I think! Bunco night would be a good thing once a month. or do something where you go to a pilates class or something in the evening. Those are some ways.

One other thing too that's good is to look into doing something where you could have some quality one on one time with your kids. Kindermusik has a class called family time that goes from ages 0-7 years! A great way to spend time with your kids in a "non-home" setting.

[ellies mom]

I agree with the girl's night out. I have a group of mom friends and we go out to dinner once a month. It is amazing how recharged I feel afterwards. There have been several times driving home where I seriously think to myself, "OK, I can go back and do this".

Since you are a runner, maybe you could find a girlfriend to join you on your long runs. Another thing I do occasionally is just go and get coffee by myself. DH takes DD1 to the movies and I just relax or I bring my laptop and work on a digital scrapbook layout. Now with DD2, that is a little harder but she still sleeps a lot so it is almost like being alone.

[lizajane]

could you plan a girls' weekend? i am always so excited to see my kids after my girls' weekend every spring. a friend has a mountain house (her parents) and we go there to hand around, talk and shop all day at the nearby outlets. shopping is the only time we leave the house!! and there is a lot of wine, of course! even if you didn't actually GO anywhere- but got a few friends together to get a hotel room for a night. someplace with a great pool or restaurant. you could lounge by the pool all day, eat and drink at the restaurant, walk back up to the room or suite and then talk or sleep or rent a pay per view movie.

are you in a running group? DH runs with a group on sat am at 6am. they average about 10 miles and then go to get coffee together or breakfast. he is really chipper when he comes home from being with his crowd. it is co-ed and full of great people.

is there a crafting place nearby? my favorite sewing store has evenings where you can pay a few bucks to come do a project at their store. you can socialize with other folks and get something DONE which always makes me feel great!

do you have anyone available for overnight childcare? maybe you and DH can go "away" to a hotel for a night or two and get some spa services while you are there! couples massage??

[niccig]

Coud your DH take the kids to a class or have a regular outing on a weekend morning? DH has been taking DS to music class on Saturdays. I use the time to just rest or catch up some things I need to do, go to the gym etc. They're away for about 90mins, and it's a something they do by themselves to bond. My DH can work crazy hours, so sometimes it's the only alone time they have together.

[elephantmeg]

for me, gym time helps as well as scheduling some time to do errands by myself (haircut plus some time at costco). Could your nanny do some extra hours so you could squeeze some time? COuld you get out as a couple?

[hillview]

OMG I could have posted your post. I also work FT and have a great nanny set up but feel like I do "everything".

Things I find useful
Exercise (I am SOOO bad at this)

I go for a walk almost every morning (kids get up super early) with the kids (a couple of miles to get a bagle). Helps me clear my head and spend some time with the kids.

I try to schedule some time with another mom once a week

I try to schedule some time with DS at least once a week -- usually dinner

HUGS!!
/hillary

[cvanbrunt]

DH could do more around the house, but he is under a lot of stress at work right now and I don't want to pull him in too many directions.


Aren't you being pulled in too many directions? I certainly don't know his work situation but you work hard too. I can understand not wanting to pile-on but is it unreasonable to expect he pick up one or two chores? My DH is doing the job of two people right now and he still cleans up the kitchen every night. Have you told him you are running on empty? He might surprise you.